(Vorador walks up to the real director and slaps her full across the face)

Raziel: Hey, I thought you once said that you would never hit a woman!!!

Vorador: Desperate times call for desperate measures, dear boy. Wake up woman, wake up!!! (Shakes the director)

Director: Zzzzzzzzzzzz…

Raziel: She's still out.

Vorador: I can see that. Did any medic come by at all?

Raziel: (Thinks carefully) Yeah, and they said that with the concussion that she has that she might not wake up until the day after tomorrow, Vorador. What about Anamae?

Vorador: Check for yourself. (Points at the girl which Umah is helping unroll from her fetal position and giving her a good dose of…some VERY powerful alcohol to get her back on her feet as best as she possibly could be)

Raziel: (Sees the young authoress muttering to herself and now pacing back and forth. He goes up to her warily) Director-in-charge, what are we going to do now?

Anamae: (Gives a sideways look at the vampire) What?

Raziel: Do we cancel the play for the evening or will we continue it?

Anamae: No, no, no, no, no, no!!!!!! The play will go on! It must go on!! This is my first time working on something this huge and I will not have it fall apart quite literally before my eyes! I need this in my resume to impress people! It will not become old and decrepit like the Sanctuary of the Clans!! Get the carpenters working on the stage immediately and-

Raziel: Already onto it. Anything else?

Anamae: Have you checked on Malek to make sure he doesn't go around and destroy anymore of the props and/or try to kill the vampire cast?

Raziel: Ariel is having a 'chat' with him right now. (Motions over in the direction of the two Pillar guardians. Malek is hanging his head in shame as best as he can while Ariel is talking very loudly and very rapidly to the Guardian of Conflict)

Ariel: I don't care at the moment for the continuation of the vampiric purges! We need this play to finish before you can go ahead and kill any more of them. And not all of them are as bad as we are led to believe; Umah has been helping out everyone here, Turel has actually gone out of his way to try and not hit on the female cast members, Dumah is for once not picking any random fights and Kain is…Kain is-

Kain: (Listening off to the side) I'm waaaaaaiiiiiiiiitttttttttiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnngggggggggg!!!!

Ariel: And Kain is just being Kain. If you don't stop Malek, then I'm going to have to revoke your guardianship and pass it onto someone else entirely. Do I make myself clear?

Malek: Yes, Ariel. Crystal. (Walks away and mutters to himself while twirling his staff in his hands and coming very close to hitting Janos in the chest with the pointed edge) Oh sorry, vampire friend for the moment. I might of impaled you had you not stepped two inches away just in time.

Janos: Remember Malek, I have a court order saying you have to stay a distance of ten feet from me at all times. (Flashes the court order, which looks very official to say the least) Got it? (The Guardian of Conflict looks at his hated nemesis for a few brief moments, then tugs haughtily on his costume's lapels and walks away…straight into a backdrop. Janos snickers as Malek tries to crawl away with as much dignity as possible)

(Rahab is, at the moment, putting the final touches on his costume, a simple friar's robe without the cross since when he did try to touch it the thing nearly burned him. Zephon walks up to his older brother and nods)

Zephon: Hey, maybe you should join the order Rahab. It suits you.

Rahab: I still can't believe that I am the poisoner. They should have handed that part over to you.

Zephon: (Voice drops dangerously low) Are you implying something by that, dear brother?

Rahab: Yes, I am. Even if this is a play, I have this on my conscious and you would have been better fitted for the part since you have none to speak of!

Zephon: I have a conscious! I just wouldn't want to switch costumes every few scenes. Getting in and out of this dress and brassier is harder than it looks. I really wonder how women manage to move around with their chest in the way all the time!

Rahab: -I really don't want to know anything, Zephon. Anyway my next scene is coming up and if these strange happenings for the play continue then I will never go onstage.

Zephon: (Exasperated) Rahab, get over it already! IT. IS. A PLAY. A play, not real life!!

Rahab: But it makes me think of that fling I had with that water nymph a summer back. Do you think that's she might be out there watching me?

Zephon: I don't know; why are you asking me these questions? Go away!!! (Runs in the opposite direction with his hands above his head and screaming at the top of his lungs. Turel walks in from one of the many doors leading off to the rooms below the stage and tisked)

Turel: Rahab, if I know anything about women - which is to say I know quite a bit - then most likely that that water nymph is sitting in the audience looking for you to come on.

Rahab: You think so?

Turel: (Parts a small section of the curtain and points over to a section of the audience where a sign reads: Mystical Beings Only) See, she's right over there! (Points to an alluring water nymph with her many other nymph friends) In fact, I might go over and introduce myself after the play.

Rahab: Oh no you won't! (Punches Turel in the face…and it looks like the prince won't be able to play his part for the next while. Dumah walks by and sees the so-called peaceful friar Rahab standing over the broken nosed Turel)

Dumah: And the people say I have anger management problems.

(In the audience)

Moebius: What is taking so long for this play to start up again?

Mortanius: Well, there are two rather large holes in the stage and from the sounds coming from behind the curtains they are trying to fix the problem as best as they can.

Dejoule: (Sarcastically) No, you think so.

Nupraptor: I know so!!!!

Bane: No one cares to know what you know, Nupraptor, so do what you do best and be quiet and then go insane after the play's over.

Nupraptor: Why am I not respected here?

Random Seraphim: If anyone's not respected from the Circle, it is Moebius.

Moebius: (Looks over at the blue skinned Ancient) What? I was under the impression that I was popular! Aren't I popular? (Looks over at the Circle guardians; watches them shake their heads)

Random Seraphim: With all the popcorn being thrown at you, as well as the water, blood, guts and other random projectiles, someone would think that you would take a hint. Also, in the brief time here, I have gotten the vampires, Seraphim and Sarafan to sign a petition against you.

Moebius: What type of petition?

Random Seraphim: Just asking you to castrate yourself and then throw yourself off a high cliff to your death. (Hands the long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long…it's a very long list…hands it to Moebius and sits back in his seat)

Moebius: What?! Mortanius, you signed this?

Mortanius: Yes.

Moebius: Dejoule? Bane? Ancarothe? He's not even here!!!

Nupraptor: See, I signed my name right here. The little smiley face adds affect, don't you think? (Points to his scrawled signature with a little smiley face beside it. The look that crosses Moebius' face can only be described best as being pissed off. Nupraptor ducked down in his seat in fear and even Mortanius began to grow a little worried)

(Four rows up and off to the left)

Suzu: Hey, is that Moebius beating Nupraptor over the head with his hourglass?

Faustus: I do believe it is. Oh, now Mortanius has gotten into the fight. For someone who looks quite frail, he can actually punch Moebius quite far.

Suzu: (Drinking her root beer) Yeah, Moebius is down and…uh-oh, the Time Streamer is back up and he had accidentally kicked Dejoule in the face!

Faustus: (Getting involved in the fight like Suzu) And now Nupraptor is fighting back by lifting up his chair and hitting Moebius over the head with it but the old man has moved to the left and the Guardian of the Mind has hit Bane!

Suzu: Is Dejoule allowed to kick an old man in the nuts?

Faustus: I don't know Moebius personally but in this case I'm going to let that rule slide!

(In fact, a fair number of people be they vampire, Seraphim or Sarafan have now started placing bets as they watch the Pillar Guardians duke it out WWF style. All sorts of projectiles by Nupraptor are hitting Moebius, while Dejoule is kicking and scratching Bane's face as the druid is trying to wrestle Mortanius off of him. From somewhere someone has put on the 'Egg Song' from Dragonhalf)

Marcus: Pathetic.

Sebastian: I agree.

(Faustus turns around to see the two other vampires from Blood Omen 2 waiting in the aisle, arms folded across their chest while they watch the fight)

Faustus: Hey, you guys finally decided to arrive. Saved the seats for you two right here. Suzu, move down two seats!

Suzu: No way, I was here first. (Looks over and sees Marcus and gets all lovey-dovey. She grabs the psychic vampire by the arm and drags him to a seat right beside her, using her wings to bash a Sarafan Glyph knight out of his seat) All right, you can sit beside me!

Sarafan Glyph Knight: Hey, I paid for that seat!


Marcus: (Nervously looks at Suzu) All right.

Sebastian: (Sits down between Marcus and Faustus) So what have we missed?

Faustus: Well, the first act seemed to be going well, but I do believe that half the cast was drunk and the other half did not know their lines properly. A few men are dressed as women because there were not enough women to play the parts and Kain…well let me just say that Kain dressed in tights and prancing around onstage making a fool of himself was well worth the price of the ticket. In the second act, which hasn't even finished, I believe that the props are being damaged on purpose and one tree fell into the stage and created a giant hole, which is now be repaired. Also Juliet's tower crashed and that is being repaired as well.

Marcus: And we missed all of this? Damn it all Sebastian, I told you we shouldn't have stopped along the way to feed off of those impudent humans. But no, you just had to go and see how many heads you could rip off in less than ten seconds and make a new record for yourself. (Looks at the programme for the play) Where is the director so I can go and complain?

Suzu: Knocked out!

Sebastian: How?

Suzu: (Smiles and munches on her popcorn, then speaks around the giant mouthful) A big fight over something trivial. The director got punched out and Anamae - she's the speaker for the whole 'Romeo and Juliet' play - has taken over!

Sebastian: Why is it taking so long for the play to go on?

Marcus: Why don't you go and find out?

Sebastian: You said you wanted to go and complain.

Marcus: Well I have decided against it. Besides you're tall, dark and scary so you can go and intimidate this Anamae easily enough.

Sebastian: I am not tall, dark and scary-looking!

Suzu: Hey, no one is going to go and intimidate Anamae! She's having enough troubles, as it is, buddy!!! (Sebastian and Suzu glare at each other, vampire staring down the half human/Seraphim. Faustus ducks down in his chair and waits for Sebastian to go berserk when suddenly-)

Dejoule: Watch out! (Crashes into the small group) Sorry, excuse me! Pissed off woman coming through!!! (Jumps back down the rows of seats and attacks Moebius, grabbing him by the head and bashing him into the floor)

Marcus: Go! Beat that old man up even if I do not know who he is or what his purpose in life might be!!!

Suzu: Hey, did you guys sign the petition against Moebius? Faustus and I did!

Sebastian: (Flatly) No.

Suzu: Hey, Seraphim, we need the petition list up here! There are two vampires who want to sign it!!!!! (List is sent up and Marcus and Sebastian sign it, and then send it back down to Moebius. Upon seeing two new names to the list, Moebius screams out in anger and bashes Nupraptor over the head with his staff)

Marcus: This is very interesting to see, even more than this play. Suzu, will you come with me afterwards to get more food at the stand?

Suzu: Sure!

Faustus: (Whispers to Sebastian) Somehow I think it was wrong to make those two sit together. Oh dear god, and there goes Bane, fried by Dejoule's energy. I do hope this play continues quickly!