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Beneath Two Moons
7. Scorched Innocence
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By Jessica Lynn S. (escaflowne@opalwings.com)
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Spoilers: The entire Escaflowne series.
Warnings: Sensuality, shoujo-ai (romance between two female characters), and a bit of violence.
Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne or its characters. No profit is being made from my silly fanfiction hobby. ^_^ I do, however, own this fic and the original characters in contains. Please do not post this story anywhere without asking first.
Summary: Hitomi rushes to save Van's life, but what of their relationship? What of Halena, who lays helpless in the dungeon, tormented by memories of her past?
IMPORTANT NOTE: So I don't confuse you; this chapter was formerly entitled "Damage Control." It's contents have been changed drastically, at least regarding Halena. Her interactions with Hitomi will be moved up to the next chapter. I felt I needed to expand upon the situation.
Note also, that with the posting of the next chapter, I will be changing my pen name (most likely to StarCollision.) If I am in your favorite stories or favorite authors, you won't have a problem finding me, but otherwise, if you want to be informed of the change, please e-mail me.
Merle and Allen couldn't hear much from where they stood in the hallway, but they figured that was a good thing. They assumed that Van and Hitomi were working things out, until a loud "thunk!" and a shout of "Just what the hell do you think you're doing?" rang out through the castle, echoing harshly off the walls. They shot each other mortified glances and rushed to the scene, which was not the scene that they were expecting to find.
The fight was not between Hitomi and Van at all. In fact, Van was curled up in his bed, all but hidden beneath several layers of blankets. He looked as if he was in a daze. Meanwhile, Hitomi looked as if she had succumbed to demonic possession. She had Halena pinned on the floor and was alternating between screaming at and slapping her as the maid struggled unsuccessfully to break free. But when Halena said "I poisoned him..." everything came together in their minds, and the cat-girl and Caeli knight clicked in to high gear.
Hitomi backed away from Halena as Allen pulled her roughly to her feet. "Find a guard and tell them to stick her in the dungeon!" Hitomi barked in command, before giving the girl one last, hard slap to the face. Allen winced inwardly at the sight of such violence being committed towards a female-- even if it was by another female. But he said nothing; the handmaiden had committed a horrible crime and he supposed that Hitomi did have a right, in this unique circumstance. He held Halena's arms behind her back and lead her from the room as he was ordered.
Halena cast her eyes down to the stone floor, making no attempt to break free. Her muscles had gone slack and her posture radiated submission, but no one really paid much mind to her as she was ushered out the door. Hitomi rushed back to Van's side and shot a glance to Merle, her anxious green eyes conveying terrible urgency.
"Van-sama?" Merle asked uncertainly, looking at her dear friend from across the room. She was met with no answer from the king. His eyes fixed straight ahead of him and he stretched out his arm, fingers clasping desperately at the air, as if he were trying to grab hold of some hallucinated object.
"I don't know where to take him, but he needs medical care." Hitomi stated the obvious.
"He needs gurar." Merle corrected, matter-of-factly. "And I am going to get some, right now. In the meantime, make sure you keep his temperature down." She scurried out and slammed the door. Gurar leaves were usually stocked in the castle's kitchen, but she found none there. Halena had most-likely disposed of them. Wench.
Merle made a mental note to go down in the dungeon later and slap that girl around far worse than Hitomi had. But at the time being, saving Van's life was a far more pressing matter. She had to go out to one of the merchants that sold herbs in the city. Thankfully, they weren't too far away, and one of them was bound to have what she needed in stock. Earlier that morning, Merle had pleaded with Hitomi to stay in Asturia a little longer, and was now feeling horribly guilty for it. If she had convinced Hitomi to stay, they would have definitely come back too late. Maybe she shouldn't have agreed to go to Asturia at all. She berated herself inwardly and ran as fast as her legs could carry her, trying to drown out the thoughts of what might happen if she didn't make it back fast enough.
Meanwhile, Allen had returned to Van's room to find Hitomi dousing the king's forehead with a wet cloth. Van writhed and muttered something incoherent, and though Allen could have sworn it was something about chickens, he sternly prohibited himself from taking amusement in it. Hitomi explained how Merle had run out for the medicinal leaves and Allen sat down in a chair, shaking his head at the situation. "It hasn't been the best of weeks for you, has it, Hitomi?" he offered with a sympathetic smile.
He felt utterly useless in the face of this particular situation, but nonetheless, he wanted to help in any way that he could. He expressed quite clearly to Hitomi that he intended to stay in Fanelia until the matter was resolved. The harsh realities of his own life forced him to be realistic about the situation. Silently and secretly, he knew that if the king died, Hitomi would need all the help that she could get. He wasn't going to gloss over that possibility. He hoped and prayed for all he was worth that things wouldn't come to that. Though he looked unfavorably upon Van's recent actions, Van was still his friend. Hitomi acknowledged Allen's smile with one of her own that seemed incredibly forced, then turned her attention back to Van. A poignant silence settled upon the room.
About twenty minutes later, Merle burst in and breathlessly deposited a small bag in Hitomi's hands before her legs gave out from under her due to sheer exhaustion. She had pushed her body to its limits and Allen was given a new duty; carrying the cat-girl off to her own room where she could rest. Hitomi wasted no time administering the leaves to Van. The royal physician was called in, but he said that there was nothing more which could be done. They had to wait for the gurar to take effect and keep Van as cool and comfortable as possible. The worst threat to his life was the fever which the poison had induced. That had to be watched closely.
The adrenaline levels of everyone in the castle were on high. Hitomi refused to leave Van's side even for a moment, so Merle filled the king's shoes temporarily, taking care of the most important matters of the day and putting the rest aside for another time. Allen questioned the guards about the previous attempt on Van's life, and addressed the security issues of the castle. After that was settled, he alternated between awkward attempts to reassure Hitomi - which did not seem to alter her mood in the slightest - and pacing. Lots and lots of pacing.
"There's a rhyme and reason
To the wild outdoors
When the heart of this star-crossed voyager
Beats in time with yours"
***
Everything was silent. Silent and dark and still, but warm. Van's eyes flickered open. Only a small sliver of the Mystic Moon was peeking out from behind the clouds outside the window. The tiny bit of light it reflected filtered through the glass, casting a pale golden illumination upon the edges of the dark, abstract sillouhettes which made up the room. One such sillouhette rose and fell like the tides of the ocean with a slow and steady rhythm. It was Hitomi, sleeping soundly beside him. She had come back, though the details of it all were still fuzzy in his mind.
He remembered her exchanging words with Halena, words he did not understand, then lifting his head to see the handmaiden pinned face-down on the floor. He remembered Allen and Merle appearing in the doorway then. He remembered Allen yanking the maid to her feet and leading her away, arms bound behind her back. He remembered Merle and Hitomi running to his side. He remembered drifting in and out of a feverish consciousness, the images of his surroundings blurring and whirling wildly before his eyes. He remembered the acrid taste of bile in his mouth, for it was all that was left inside him. He remembered the distinct thought that he was going to die.
Then he remembered someone slipping something through his lips. The taste was bitter on his tongue and he had wanted to spit it out, but he hadn't the energy. "Please Van, please chew it. Swallow it down." He remembered Hitomi's hand clasping his, her palms sweating and fingers trembling, and her other hand stroking his face, pressing lightly on his jaw to coax him. The jumbled memories danced like a chaotic kaleidoscope, then suddenly clicked in to focus, coming together to form a perfectly clear picture of the day's events. Gurar leaves! The antidote for poison... Halena had been trying to poison him with her tea! She had said something about the man he killed in the garden, what exactly, he was unsure.
He remembered that day, not so long ago, when he had laid in bed hating himself for the swift decapitation of his assassin and drinking himself in to a stupor. He remembered how he'd tried to hide it from Hitomi and how he had treated her when she came to him with genuine concern for his well-being. He remembered how her hand had struck his face, and how she'd fled to Asturia with Merle and Celena. But despite all of that, she came back. She came back and saved his life. She had been by his side the entire time since. He remembered her dabbing his forehead, face and throat with a cool cloth. He remembered her warm limbs wrapped around his body as the gurar and the poison fought for dominance in his bloodstream, wracking him with icy chills. He remembered her voice soft in his ear; desperate and pleading words he couldn't understand.
He looked up once again at the moon, and judging from its position in the sky, he could tell it was in the early hours of the morning. Dawn would soon be upon them. Despite the vigilance of the watch she'd kept over him, Hitomi had finally surrendered herself to well-deserved sleep. She was on her side, facing him, and he reached out towards her hesitantly. He weakly stroked a fingertip over her closed eyelids and down the side of her face, careful not to wake her. He then slid his hand beneath the collar of her shirt, pressing his palm against her breastbone. Her skin was warm and he could feel the gentle pulsing of her heart beneath it. He closed his eyes, and that heartbeat was all there was.
He remembered pressing the heels of his hands in to her chest there, pumping firmly and desperately in time with the rhythm of his own heart in order to restart hers in the Freidian dungeon. He remembered holding her hand through the bars of a cage in the Zaibach empire, both their free hands clutched to their chests as they felt the pain of Escaflowne's energist stone being torn from it, and fought to control the guymelef from afar. One could say that the organ responsible for circulating all of the body's blood and infusing it with life-giving oxygen had no real connection to love; it only fluttered in response to the adrenaline of the emotion. But Van and Hitomi had kept each other's hearts from stopping forever on several occasions, and this was another to add to the list.
Their relationship hadn't had a normal start at all. Back in those days, they were always saving each other's lives, but never admitting to their true feelings. The few times Van came close, he had become insecure and said something horrible to cover his tracks. His pathetic attempts to cover up the assassination attempt (well, the first one) hadn't been much different. She had slapped him and ran out on him, like an echo of their past. But yet, she had come back. Warm, sentimental tears rolled down his cheeks as, without thinking clearly, he reached out and pulled Hitomi's body tightly to his. Without realizing what was going on, Hitomi lashed out her hand towards him, her palm catching his cheek.
Van gaze a small laugh. "That is always how you showed me you loved me." he whispered.
She blinked her eyes open. "Van? You're awake?" She didn't give him time to answer before asking another question. "Van? Why was your hand in my shirt?!"
He turned his eyes away from her, sheepishly. "I...I wanted to feel your heart." he said softly, pressing his firmly in to the place where they'd rested to convey his sincerity.
"Hmm..." she said, then pulled out of his grip, rolling over to face away from him. "You have a lot of explaining to do, Van Slanzer Fanel."
"Eee...you sound like my mother!" Van said. He sighed. "But you're right, Hitomi, I do. And I will explain it all. Just please, turn around again?"
"Keep your hands off my chest?"
"I already said it wasn't like that! But, that's fair enough, I suppose..."
She rolled over again, and stared searchingly in to his eyes, keeping a considerable distance between their two bodies.
"God, where should I begin?" Van muttered to himself, feeling uncomfortable beneath her piercing gaze. "Okay, well, the day before you left...I was really, really happy. I was walking in the garden like I usually do, talking to Folken's statue." He blushed slightly. "I do that sometimes." he stammered quickly in explanation. "Anyway, out of nowhere, this man ran at me, swinging his sword. Without even thinking about it, I drew my own sword and well...well... I lopped off his head, fast and clean. All of that happiness faded. I could try for hours but still not be able to fully explain how I felt about the incident. I was really shaken."
Hitomi had uttered a surprised gasp and the revelation. "So that's what Halena was talking about..." she whispered. "We haven't sent anyone down to question her yet. I barely even thought of that with all that's been happening..."
Van continued his story. "I felt horrible that I killed him. Sure, he tried to kill me, but when I think back...if I had been thinking clearly at the time, I could have captured him, learned his motives, and had him tried for a fair punishment. Hitomi, I'm so sorry for hiding it from you. I know if I would have talked to you about it, you would have made me feel so much better. You've always had a knack for that, you know? But...I couldn't bring myself to. There was that guilt factor, but I was worried for you, too. I was worried, what if this were part of a larger plot? What if there were further attempts? What if you were endangered? I remember the war and how you were always trying to put yourself in harm's way for me. I didn't want you to do that again. I didn't want you to decide to start reading those cards again, and having those visions... Even if, some day, another war breaks out in Gaea, I still don't want you to go through that again."
He reached out and clutched her hand desperately, and let out a soft whimper, at which point Hitomi became aware that he was crying. She felt her chest tighten at the realization, and she wanted nothing more than to hold him and tell him everything was okay, but she bit down on her lip and said what she really needed to say. "So you got snappy with me instead, even a little bit violent, and then when I left for a few days you were stupid enough to get yourself poisoned? Totally unacceptable. Do you have any idea that you almost died? If I had come even an hour later; if your fever had climbed even a degree higher..." She didn't finish the sentence. His hands clasped hers even tighter, and though she'd made no effort to disengage him, she let her fingers lay slack, not returning his grip.
Van was silent except for one sharp, sniffling inhalation. "Thank you for saving me." he whispered, finally. "I'm sorry I caused you so much trouble."
"Don't think that I am just going to let this slide." Hitomi said sternly.
"I...I don't want you to leave me." Van whispered. "I can't blame you if you do, but if there's anything I can do to make it up to you, just let me know. If there's anything you want, say the word and it's yours."
Hitomi closed the distance between them brushed her lips over his cheek, sticky with tears. He let go of her hand to stroke her face, and shivered upon finding the warm, salty remains of tears there as well. "You've been crying too." he observed ruefully. "You just hid it better than I did." She let out an abrupt sniffle.
"How am I not supposed to cry after all of this?" she asked, the sound of tears now painfully evident in her voice. She laid her head on his chest, a few tears falling on his shirt, which already smelled of dried-out sweat and could not get much dirtier. Apparently, in her emotional distress, Hitomi's sense of smell failed her. Van reached his arms around her and caught her in a reassuring embrace.
"I never said you're not supposed to cry. It's just that I'm deeply saddened to be the reason for those tears." he responded.
"Well..." she whispered weakly, "you can start making it up to me by rubbing my back. You have no idea how tense I am right now." Van had neither the energy nor the leverage, with Hitomi so close to him, to administer proper pressure, but he wasn't going to give up the closeness for anything. He slid his hands over her back began kneading carefully at the knotted muscles on either side of her spine with his fingertips as best he could.
"You are tense." he sighed guiltily, then a small smile cracked on his lips as he remembered something. "You beat up Halena, didn't you?"
"Well, I...guess I did." said Hitomi, sheepishly. Van laughed and snuggled closer to her. Upon realizing exactly how out-of-character it was for her to be so violent, Hitomi began laughing too. Van kissed her forehead. In that one moment, he felt a lot of the aforementioned tension flow effortlessly from her body.
"New plan." said Hitomi. "Just hold me."
He gladly complied, pulling her as close as he possibly could without cutting of either her circulation or his own. She had relaxed completely in his arms - that was fast, he thought to himself - and her breath felt warm against his throat.
"You know, it was pretty damn stupid of me to get poisoned." he said, running his fingers through her soft, fine hair. "Halena's attempt was pretty half-assed. So was the other guy's, when I think about it. But look how much it almost hurt us."
"Mmhmm." muttered Hitomi, nuzzling in to his shoulder. "But I was stupid too, Van. I almost left Gaea. That's part of the reason I was crying. I feel guilty too, because...I almost gave up on you."
"Now that you've said that, I'm never going to let you go." Van said, his arms still locked tightly around her.
"That's just fine with me." Hitomi said. "Hold me like this forever." A few moments passed with only the peaceful sound of their breath, rising and falling in perfect unison. "Actually," Hitomi said, breaking the silence, "are you feeling completely better?"
"I have that weird feeling that you get when you've slept for too long." Van said, "But I really don't think that I'm sick anymore."
"Then would you...well, umm..." Hitomi stammered, a question dancing on the tip of her tongue before she finally found the courage to blurt it out. "...make love to me?"
"Hitomi, I thought we were going to wait until our wedding night?"
"I know you only said that to take the pressure off of me. And that whole principle of delayed gratification... You know, everything between us has been delayed, from the realization of our feelings, to our first kiss, to this fight that we just had. I don't want this to be delayed any longer. I want to claim you as my own." She wrapped her legs tightly around his torso. He brought a hand up to stroke the her hair.
"I've always been yours." he whispered, kissing her cheek. "And I'll always be yours whether you like it or not." She slid her hands over his hipbones, up his across his ribs and down over the front of his chest. Van caught her hands, his expression becoming mildly concerned.
"Please." she whimpered. She nuzzled his neck, planting small, fluttering kisses across it.
"Hitomi, you're right, I did say that to take the pressure off." Van affirmed. "We don't have to wait until our wedding night, but look... I'm tired, you're tired as hell, and really emotional. One minute you're yelling at me to get my hand out of your shirt...and the next you're saying you want me...inside you? No offense of course." he added quickly in a small voice, bracing himself for another slap, but it did not come. "It's good that we've got this all worked out, but to do that now would be disrespectful to you. Like I could have my way even though I was horrible to you."
"Mmmf." said Hitomi.
"I love you." said Van. He raised a worried eyebrow when she didn't say it back, but then she gave a loud snore, and he realized she was already asleep.
"Silly, silly girl." he said to himself. He closed his eyes, and let sleep find him again as well.
The cell was dark, musty and deathly chilly. The only light came from outside the dungeon door, where a guard stood watch throughout the early hours of the new day. Halena leaned back against the stone wall with her arms wrapped tightly around her body as she shivered against the cold. She brought the fingers of her right hand to her face and ran them absently over the raised scar tissue there as she thought back to her past. Like most common people in Fanelia, she'd come from a family of farmers. She had a mother, a father, a younger sister, and a baby brother. Everyone put in their share of work to feed and clothe the family, and despite their low income, they were all fairly happy together. They had everything they needed.
She remembered being twelve years old, wearing a long, dark blue silk dress with matching ribbons to hold elaborate looping braids in her hair. She wore a charcoal bodice over the dress which accentuated her developing curves, and a chain of fragrant white flowers that her sister had made for her around her neck. She had spun around admiring her reflection in the mirror and felt invincible. News had come in the morning that Prince Van returned unscathed from the rite of dragonslaying, and she and her father were to attend his coronation in the evening. Her feelings toward the royalty were different back then; she looked upon the boy who would become king with the same wide-eyed admiration as many of his subjects did now. She and her sister had even gushed over how handsome he was.
Her sister, who had to stay home, envied her for being able to witness history first-hand. Little did the younger girl know how much history Halena would be witnessing, and little did Halena know that her final glance in the mirror before she took off towards town was her last glimpse of her face and life as they'd always been; untainted and unmarred.
It was only moments after Van had been declared king that the battle broke out. Orders were given to the frenzied crowd to hurry to the mountains. She and her father rushed home to collect the rest of their family, but when they arrived, they found the house in flames. He commanded her to wait outside as he rushed in to the flames in attempt to save her mother and siblings. Halena stood in the doorway, desperately calling in to the roaring fire for him to return. She shielded her profusely-watering eyes from the unbearably hot, red-orange wind with her arm. The air was thick with smoke and it became hard to breathe. Suddenly, she heard a loud snap. The last thing she saw was the house she'd lived in her entire life coming to the ground in a violent crash of sparks and ashes.
She had no idea how much time lapsed between then and when she woke again. All she knew is that when she woke, her body ached and her skin stung like it had been torn from her body. The very act of breathing caused her immeasurable pain. She laid very still, unsure of where she was or what had happened, hoping only for death to come and relieve her of her suffering. Death did not come. The fates were not that merciful. When she could finally open her eyes to see and her mouth to speak, she discovered that she was in an encampment in the woods. An elderly lady had been caring for her. Halena asked her what had happened.
"Fanelia has been destroyed." the woman said.
As the pain gradually began to fade from unbearable to tolerable, she began to hope not for death, but to be found by her family. She wanted nothing more in the world then for them to be okay. Once again fate had no mercy. Days bled in to weeks, for which her entire world was nothing more than the dingy canvas roof of the tent she lay in and the moths and flies that fluttered around the lantern suspended from its ceiling. She was aware that she smelled rather unpleasant; not unlike jerky. Occasionally, rumor would reach the ruined kingdom. Messengers spoke of the young king fighting gallantly against their enemies in the distant lands of Asturia and Freid with the dragon, Escaflowne. The citizens hoped he would return victorious to rebuild what had been lost. That hope kept many going, despite the loss of their homes and worldly possessions, but to Halena, the stories seemed nothing more than fairytales. She had trouble believing in anything.
Eventually, her wounds had healed enough so that she could sit up, even though the movement of her muscles beneath her skin still made it sting and itch horribly. One night when her self-appointed caretaker had already retired for the evening, Halena snuck out of the tent and back to where her family's house once stood beneath the cover of darkness.
It confirmed the worst of her fears. She had hoped that the house's violent collapse had only been a dream; but there was nothing left of it or her old life. Her family was truly gone. Her sister, who was timid and beautiful. Her brother, who was obnoxious, but still cute. Her mother, who had taken ill over the winter but had been finally starting to recover. Her father, who was a rough man, but gentle underneath it all. They had all been swallowed in flame and perished there. She felt cursed to be left living when they all had to die. Salty tears stung the seared skin of her face.
When the moons hung at their highest, she found her way to a remote lake in the forest. There she took off the clothes the old lady had dressed her in and looked upon her body for the first time since the fire. She was shocked by what she saw in the water's moonlit mirror-surface. Almost all of her hair was gone, and the charred segments had been cut out unevenly from what was left. The left side of her face and neck was one gigantic and blistered bruise-colored burn with the exception of her green eye, which by some miracle she hadn't lost. A few smaller burns were on the right side of her face, her left shoulder and across her rib cage. There was another large one on her forearm where she had shielded her face from the flames.
She would have been horrified of the sight were it not for the sadness which already weighed heavy in her heart. She felt like something bent and broken; like she was dead but somehow still forced to live on anyway. She waded in to the water, hoping it would banish some of the jerky smell. Afterwards, she laid on the bank and let the water on her skin evaporate in to the warm summer air. She spent the entire night there, barely able to sleep. She didn't return to the encampment.
She wasn't quite sure why she didn't go back. Perhaps she felt she could not face the people with her disfigurement. Perhaps she just didn't feel as if she had a place among them anymore. None of them were her family, after all. For many days and nights, she would stay by the lake, watching the ripples in its cold, clear water. Occasionally she'd eat berries from the surrounding trees, but for the most part she wasn't very hungry. Starving to death had a certain appeal. She grew gangly and emaciated, though she barely noticed or cared. Her clothes were stained with grass and mud, but at least she could bathe at any time she wished.
Then one rainy day, he wandered out of the woods while she laid resting in the grass, staring up at the cloudy sky.
She jumped at the sound of snapping twigs and turned to see a man who was probably in his early twenties. He had long, chestnut-colored hair and a beard of thick stubble; as there hadn't been any means to shave since the fires. His eyes were of a soft golden brown. They were wrought with compassion when they fell upon her. She was about to scamper away in to the undergrowth when he spoke to her.
"Why aren't you at the encampment?" he asked. "They have food there. The men have been hunting in the woods." When she didn't answer, he came a few steps closer. She backed away. "You poor girl." he said with a frown. "Such crimes Fanelia has allowed."
She took off running. She couldn't bare it; couldn't bare being treated as something to be pitied. She was ashamed of herself. She ran until her lungs ached and her scabbed-over skin itched and oozed, then curled in to a ball on the forest floor. When she returned to the lake in the evening, he was gone. She thought she'd seen the last of him. But only a few days later, he returned. Like before, she ran away. He didn't pursue her. Instead, he sat down in the grass and began cooking a rather large slab of meat.
She hadn't realized before how hungry she really was and the smell slowly drew her back to the lake. She sat in the bushes watching him, hoping he'd leave at least a little bit when he was finished. After some time, he looked up and it was apparent that he knew she was there.
"Why don't you come eat some?" he asked softly. "I made this for you, you know."
Hunger and pride warred within her, but in the end hunger got the better of pride. She didn't know what his intentions for her were, but she didn't care. Being killed would be an even greater kindness than food. She hesitantly came forward and sat down cross-legged before him, several yards away from the fire.
"I can't blame you for not wanting to be near it." the man said. "Fire has left its mark on all of our memories. My name is Kipalisa."
She still didn't talk, and he seemed to accept that. No more words were said until the food was cooked, then they ate together in silence. Then he packed up his things and walked away. For just a second, he turned around and met her eyes. "Your eyes are a very pretty color." he said.
"Under a blackened sky
Far beyond the glaring street lights
Sleeping on empty dreams
The vultures lie in wait
You lay down beside me there
You were with me every waking hour
So close that I could feel your breath"
***
Kipalisa came every day after that with food. Sometimes the portions were meager, for it was only what he could kill and the local wildlife had suffered nearly as much from Zaibach's attack as the citizenry. The brown-haired man puzzled Halena. He didn't fuss over her wounds - which had become little more than a mosaic of scars - like the old woman back at the encampment had. He didn't talk to her like a child, when he actually talked, and he never expected her to respond. He just let her be whoever and whatever she was. After a while she decided that she could trust him; that perhaps she even liked him.
"My name is Halena." she told him, one evening after finishing their food. "Halena Mapel. Not that it matters, because I am the only one left by that name." He nodded understandingly in response.
"Your hair is starting to grow back, Halena." he noted. "It's a very interesting shade, just like your eyes."
After that, he didn't come for days. She wondered vaguely what had become of him; if perhaps he had died, or just simply forgotten about her. She even felt a little bit abandoned. He was the only human contact she'd had for a very long time. Then one night she awakened to him standing above her with a torch.
"The king has returned to Fanelia." he said. "The country is to be rebuilt. Won't you please come with me? We'll have to live in a shelter for a while, but it's better than out here in the woods. Winter will be here soon. You shouldn't be alone."
She reluctantly accepted his offer.
The castle was one of the first buildings in line for reconstruction; though not for reasons of vanity. As soon as the first floor had walls, it became a shelter to all those who had been left homeless so that they didn't have to spend the winter in their makeshift tents and shacks. Of course, the entire country didn't fit in to the castle. Other shelters were erected, too, and it was in such a shelter that Halena and Kipalisa found themselves. After they moved in there, Halena didn't see much of Kipalisa. He was always out, working to rebuild his home somewhere in the capitol. He came back to the shelter only to eat and sleep. The most he'd give her anymore was a glance.
I was a fool to think that his actions were anything beyond pity, she thought sadly to herself.
Other people in the shelter spoke to her, but their words were nothing but pity either. Kipalisa had at least called her a poor girl. They called her a poor thing. Granted she wasn't the only one there to have received unpleasant and scarring burns, she was still in the minority. She still felt as if she should have died, but somewhere over the course of months, the feelings of helplessness and submission gave way to something else. Anger and newfound conviction simmered within her slowly, building like thunderheads in a hot, hazy sky, until one day when she cornered Kipalisa.
"You're just like the rest of them, aren't you?" she demanded, an unearthly green fire smoldering in her eyes.
"I beg your pardon?" he asked her.
"When you look at me, all you see is a poor little orphan girl living in tainted skin. You took care of me in the woods as if I were a stray cat, but now that there are other people do to that, you don't have the time of day for such a pathetic creature!"
"No," he said, "I wasn't under the impression that you wanted company."
"I don't have a family." she hissed. "I had one uncle in this town, but he's gone too. Do you think anyone wants to be alone this much, with no one to actually respect or understand them?"
"No, Halena, I suppose not. I do respect you, though." Kipalisa said, and without any more words, he moved to embrace her. It was strange, being held by another person after so long without any physical contact. She braced herself, trying hard not to tremble in his arms. She didn't want Kipalisa to think that she was a weak, frightened child. She wanted him to see her as a woman; as a person. For the first time, she realized that she wanted him to love her, though that was foolish. No one would love her with her scars.
"Halena?" he asked. "You don't have a place to go once Fanelia is rebuilt, do you?" She shook her head no. "When my home is finished, you can live with me." he said, gently stroking her hair. For a moment, she felt as if a beam of sunlight had been cast over the dark clouds of her life.
"Pressed up against the glass
I found myself wanting sympathy
But to be consumed again
Oh I know would be the death of me
And there is a love that's inherently given
The kind of blindness offered to appease
In the light of forbidden joy
Oh I know I won't recieve it
***
After eight long months, Kipalisa's residence was rebuilt. Halena, now thirteen years old, was determined to make herself as useful for him as she had been for her parents, if not more so. She poured all her energy in to cooking meals, scrubbing floors, and making new clothes for her host and herself. Kipalisa would still be out for most of the daylight hours, helping to rebuild the kingdom. The day things changed the most between them was not unlike any other. She had been left to her own devices for the day, and was hard at work preparing the evening's meal. Her full attention was on the food she cooked, and she did not hear him come in, so she was startled when he came up and hugged her from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder.
"You're a good woman, Halena." he said softly in to her ear. "You've worked so hard. You've been so helpful to us. And I think...that I am falling in love with you."
"Kipalisa?" she asked, turning to face him, her eyes locked in to his. He pulled her close and ever-so-gently pressed his lips to hers. She was in complete and utter shock, paralyzed as he kissed her with the utmost tenderness and reverence. "But...my face..." she said, when he finally pulled away. She had never spoken directly with him about her injuries, in all the weeks and months they had spent together. She had been too ashamed to. It was like her dark secret which everyone in the world could see.
"I don't see scars when I look at you." he answered. "I see a woman with bright, beautiful green eyes and soft violet hair." He ran his fingers through the silky strands which now reached almost to her shoulders.
"I see a woman who is incredibly kind, hard-working and devoted. I see a woman who has been failed by the king and country that was supposed to protect her." She raised an eyebrow in confusion.
Kipalisa proceeded to sit her down at the table and tell her of all the secrets and shortcomings of the royal family; namely the accursed Draconian blood. If Van had really cared for his country, he wouldn't have run away to return when it was convenient for him - and as a hero, nonetheless - Kipalisa insisted. He would have fought to the end, even if that end was his own death. Leaving Fanelia behind in the wake of destruction made him no better than Folken, who had run from the rite of succession.
"I want you to help me, to get vengeance for your family and all the others who died because of this cowardice." Kipalisa told her.
He wanted to kill Van in the end, though it wasn't quite as simple as that. He had to bide his time as the country was rebuilt, as an assassination in the midst of the process would throw the entire country in to a worse chaos than there had been during the war. Without their king, they would be left totally vulnerable and could easily be absorbed in to the greedy bowels of another nation. In the meantime, he wanted to instill someone within the castle, an informant to keep him updated on the actions of the king and his advisors. Halena would be perfect for the job. The cat-girl who was now on the council had a soft spot for those left orphaned by the war. Halena was to go to her requesting employment.
A week later, Halena left for the castle, slightly frustrated with what had passed between them. She had asked Kipalisa to take her virginity before she left. He refused, saying that if his plans failed, he could be executed. He didn't want her to be spoiled for the future, when perhaps she could find a husband who would love and care for her as he had.
"Don't talk like that!" she admonished. Deep inside, she felt as if he was the only one who could ever love her.
"Look, Halena, I'll do my best." Kipalisa insisted. "But I can't promise anything. If everything works out as planned, we'll marry once someone new has ascended to the throne and we'll live out the rest of our days in happiness. It's just that if something should happen to me, I want you to be safe. I want you to go on living as you have always had."
She stared at wall of the cell. He had always put her before him. Even if he had used her to further his own cause, he had done so with the utmost concern for her safety. He didn't want any evidence that she was connected to his plans. She was surprised at how little his death had shaken her, when it all came down to it. You can only loose so much before to begin to expect loss. But there had been no way she was going to stand by and allow the man who'd slaughtered Kipalisa to live. Even though Kipalisa had wanted her to be safe, she put herself in harm's way in hopes that she could achieve his dream for a new, uncontaminated royalty. She had failed miserably.
Now, she was probably going to be executed. That would be all well and good, except that she did not want Van to have the satisfaction of being the one to order her killed -- or one of his men, if he still died from the poisoning. She reached in to her sleeve to find the small knife she had hidden there. In their haste to get her locked away, the guards hadn't bothered to search her. That was a foolish move on their part. She pressed the metal blade to her wrist. She hadn't cried in years. Now she would cry tears of blood and hope that death would finally embrace her as she thrust the knife in to her vein.
After everything that had happened, most people would have had the common sense and decency to let Van and Hitomi be. Merle, however, did not. Only an hour after sunrise, she burst in to the room without knocking and took a flying leap in to the bed, landing on the couple, who were still tightly entwined in each other's arms. "Van-sama?!" she squealed, shaking him. "Van-sama, you're alive, right?" Hitomi and Van groaned in unison. "Oh, thank goodness!" continued Merle in an anxious and high-pitched tone. "I didn't sleep a wink last night, you know, I was so worried... I felt responsible. I can't believe this happened..."
Hitomi detached one arm from Van and grabbed Merle around the waist, pulling her down in to the covers beside her. "So shut your damn mouth already and sleep!" she muttered. Her voice was agitated, but her embrace was understanding and sympathetic. Merle happily obliged, and her eyes were closed within minutes. It was nearly afternoon before any of them woke again.
"Chickens." Van muttered in his sleep. "Chickens?" He opened his eyes to look at his sleeping fiancee. "Oh, that's Hitomi." he said, correcting himself. Hitomi stirred at the mention of her name and blinked sleepily. Van then noticed a warm weight on his chest. Merle was still sound-asleep, sprawled out carelessly over top of both him and Hitomi. "Merle?" he shook her. "Merle?" When she gave no response, he gently rolled her on to the unoccupied sliver of bed beside him. Without conscious thought to the situation, she latched on to his arm and bit, hard.
"...Never waking anyone up again..." he muttered to himself.
Merle relinquished her mouthful of arm as soon as she realized where she was. "Van-sama!" she squealed. "You're alive!!!"
"I thought we already had that established." groaned Hitomi sleepily.
Van hugged Merle and kissed the top of her head. She purred contentedly. After giving Hitomi a similar kiss, he shifted himself in to a sitting position, stretched out leisurely, and announced "I am not doing any kind of work today. None whatsoever. Politics and meetings can wait."
"I'm definitely not going to argue with that." said Hitomi, in her warm, sleepy voice. "I'm so glad to have you back."
"We'll have a Van-sama's not dead party, instead!" Merle suggested with a grin. "Just the three of us."
"Geeze, you're morbid." complained Van, and slammed his elbow in to the Merle's arm, though not hard enough to inflict any actual pain.
It was some time later that Allen walked in to the room. He'd been rather concerned by the lack of activity, but he found the king of Fanelia alive and well, cuddling contentedly with the two most important women in his life.
"Oh..." said Hitomi, "I'm sorry I never came out to tell you that Van's better." She frowned guiltily.
"Want to join us, Allen?" asked Van with a goofy smile.
"Umm, I'll pass." said Allen uncomfortably. "I am glad to see your all right, Van, but I have to return to Asturia. Eries and Celena must be worried by now. Before I leave, I want to have a word with you...alone."
Hitomi and Merle took that as their cue to exit the room, and with great effort, hauled themselves out of bed. Van climbed out as well, standing face-to-face with Allen. "Thanks for looking after Hitomi," he said, "and thanks for helping out with this situation." He threw his arms around the Caeli knight and gave him a gigantic hug which Allen had definitely not been expecting.
"Is this...the same angstful young king I fought beside during the war?" he asked with a surprised blink.
Van shrugged. "Love does funny things to a person." he responded as Allen returned the hug awkwardly, then backed away.
"Well...about that..." said Allen, meeting his eyes with furrowed brows. "If Hitomi ever shows up on my doorstep crying because of you again..." He made a cut-throat gesture, his pupils narrowing.
Van frowned a little bit. "It won't happen again, I promise."
AN: Yeah, I kept Van hugging Allen. It was awkward and OOC, but it was supposed to be...that's the beauty of it! Okay, so maybe I take amusement in strange things, but I'm allowed. I'm sorry I couldn't get chap. 8 finished in time for Christmas. I didn't want to rush it this time only to have to go back and revise like all these other chapters. Speaking of which, anyone want to beta-read it for me when it's done? You have to be willing to provide negative criticism as well as positive - yeah, I know, that's hard for me too! - but I'll love you forever if you will! (Just e-mail me if you're interested.)
But yeah, I've been working hard on chapter 8 and it can be expected sometime in the New Year. Maybe even before, depending on how bored I get...hehe. Have a great Holiday, everyone, which ever one it is that you celebrate!
For anyone who's interested, I now have some piccies of my niece Lynn! You can see them at: http://www.opalwings.com/thebaybay.html
Song Quotes: 1. "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" by Elton John. (I heard the song on the radio a few nights ago and realized that the whole thing reminds me of Hitomi and Van...hehe. Yes, I'm sappy.) 2 & 3. "Wait" by Sarah McLachlan.
Site Plug: http://www.opalwings.com/escaflowne