Author's note: Sorry it took so long! But here is the FINAL chapter of WWE
kindergarten! (I actually finished a kindergarten fic!!!) This chapter is
quite a bit longer than the other ones because I was originally going to
write it in two or three chapters. There is an epilogue at the end of this
chapter so there MAY be a sequel or sequels (wwe elementary, wwe middle
school, wwe high school..) you get the idea.
********************
First period
********************
Ms Marie: Ok, it's time to read out your state assignments. Christian, you can go first
Christian: California is very sunny. The capital of California is Sunnydale where Buffy the vampire slayer lives. . .
Ms Marie: WHAT? Christian! Where did you get all of THIS from?
Christian: (nervously) UPN?
Ms Marie: Well done (write an "F" in her mark book) Now Booker,
Booker T: Maine is very cold and is. . .
**********************
55 mins later
*********************
Ms Marie : Ok everyone well done, time for Recess.
*********************
Recess (by the climbing frame)
*********************
Y2J: Ok everyone, the final battle will take place after school today. We will compete in the following events, (reads list) 100 metres, long jump, triple jump, gymnastics and dance routine. . . DANCE ROUTINE!!!
Steph: Yes! I asked HHH if we could!
Y2J: Ok, FINE! Just don't make ME join in.
Rock: And if the competition goes to a tie, a WRESTLING match between the team captains/
(all cheer)
Y2J: We'll pick our teams at lunchtime, go train everybody.
(everyone starts doing star jumps)
***********************
Behind the bike shed
***********************
HHH: (sings) Taker and Arianna, sittin' in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
Taker: (yells) SHUT UP!
Arianna: Make him stop Mark!
Taker: Shut up Hunter!
HHH: make me!
(Taker pushes him over)
HHH: OWWWWWW! I'm telling!
(HHH runs off)
Arianna: Why do you hang around with those people! I don't like them!
Taker: I don't really like them either.
Arianna: Then why do you still hang around with them.
Taker: Because . . .
Arianna: Because what?
Taker: I don't know. . . I don't even WANT to be their friend.
Arianna: Then don't.
Taker: hmmm. . . . .
*****************
By the climbing frame
*****************
Y2J: We need a song.
Rock: What?
Y2J: a theme song for our team, all great sports teams have one.
Rock: Ok, any ideas?
Y2J: 99 cans of whoop-ass on the wall, 99 cans of whoop-ass, take one down, pass it around, 98 cans of whoop-ass on the wall. . .
Rock: Great! Let's get the team together and teach it to them!
(Taker enters)
Rock: ARGH! Run run!
Y2J: HELP!
Taker: I'm not here to hurt you!
Y2J: Really?
Taker: I want to join your team.
Y2J: YAY!
****************
Start of sports festival
****************
Y2J: Before the festival starts we shall sing our group anthem.
All: Ninety-nine can of whoop-ass on the wall. . .
***************
4 hours later
***************
All: 3 cans of whoop-ass on the wall, 3 can of whoop-ass
HHH: STOP! I can't take anymore!
Y2J: You interrupted! Now we have to start again!
All: ninety nine cans of whoop-ass on the wall. . .
**************
4 hours later
**************
Y2J: Take one down, pass it around, no more cans of whoop-ass on the wall!
HHH: Thank God!
Rock: Now we can start the sports festival. 100 metres first.
(Cut to two kids at a desk with toy microphones)
Michael Cole: And here we have the 100 metres race a crucial face off between Kurt Angle and Kane.
Tazz: Oh this is gonna be good Cole.
(Kurt and Kane line up)
Rock: Ready set GO!
(They run, Angle is winning but the Kane chokeslams him and overtakes. Angle gets up and keeps running and overtakes Kane on the last 5 metres. Angle crosses finish line first but as he celebtreates Kane chokeslams him)
Angle: OW!
(That's for Ashley who said I should beat up Angle coz he talked too much)
Michael Cole: The winner of the first event is Kurt Angle!
Tazz: That gives the kindergarteners an early lead 1-0.
Michael Cole: Now for the second event. GYMNASTICS!
******************
Molly Holly and Big Show line up
******************
Tazz: Big Show, on the count of three, do your routine. One, two THREE!
(Big show does a forward roll, second graders clap)
Tazz: Ok, now Molly, Ready set GO!
(Molly does a triple backflip, a tuck somersault then cartwheels in a circle before doing a handstand to finish, Kindergarteners applaud Raucously)
Michael Cole: YOUR WINNER MOLLY!!!!
Tazz gives the kindergarteners a 2-0 lead Cole!
Michael Cole: Now we will take a short break, join us again in 10 minutes.
**********************
Kindergartener's Team talk
**********************
Rock: Ok, we're doing great so far. It would take some real bad luck for us to lose.
Y2J: (Writing list) Foot massage, shoe cleaning, homework doing, backpack carrying. . .
Rock: Dude? What are you doing?
Y2J: I'm making a list of all the things I want HHH to do once he's my personal slave.
Rock: (cackles) Yeah, this is gonna be great.
Hurricane: It's my event next, long jump!!!
Rock: Think you can win?
Hurricane: Of course, I can FLY!
Rock: oh boy,
Hurricane: (indignantly) I CAN!!!
Rock: Ok then, go fly coz it's your event Superman!
Hurricane: I'm NOT SUPERMAN!!!
Rock: Fine, fine
*****************
Tazz: Will the Long jump contestants please line up.
(Big Show and Hurricane line up)
Tazz: Hurricane, ready set GO!!!
(Hurricane jumps a short distance)
Tazz: Big show, GO!
(Big show takes one step forward and steps right past hurricane because he is so big)
Hurricane: HEY!!!
Tazz: That's perfectly rule abiding, BIG SHOW IS THE WINNER!!!
Michael Cole: The 2nd graders pull back to 2-1!
Tazz: Now for the triple jump.
(Hurricane and Big show line up again and the same thing happens)
Tazz: Your winner, BIG SHOW!!!
Michael: Now it's a 2-2 draw Tazz.
Tazz: Let's hope the kindergarteners have something up their sleeves.
*********************
Kindergarteners team talk
********************
Steph: We have something up our sleeves right?
Rock: Yes.
Lita: Well what is it?
Y2J: Look at the second grader's team and count them.
Steph: (on fingers) HHH, one, Kane, two, Big Show, three. HEY! Where's Undertaker?!
Rock and Y2J: (laugh evilly) MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You'll see.
********************
Second Grader's team talk
********************
HHH: (to kane) Where's Undertaker?
Kane: I dunno.
HHH: Big show?
Big Show: I dunno.
HHH: Oh poopy pants!!! He's gone off somewhere and we need him!!!
****************
Michael Cole: Now it's time for the Pole vault.
Tazz: We'll pit Jeff Hardy against Kane!
(Jeff does his jump and clears the bar)
Kindergarteners: YAY!
(Kane does his jump and knocks the bar over)
Kindergarteners: YAY!!!
(HHH runs over with a second grader.)
HHH: This is Earl Hebner, he's our referee!
Earl Hebner: Kane is the winner!!!
Kindergarteners: (Chant) YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF!
Earl Hebner: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
(He runs off)
HHH: Earl's decision stands! We win Pole vault!
Kindergarteners: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Second graders: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
Tazz: It's now 3-2 to the second graders
Michael Cole: This looks bad for the kindergarteners Tazz.
Tazz: Well Duh!
*******************
Kindergartener's Team talk
*******************
Y2J: Steph, you have to win the dance routine or we've lost!!!
Steph: Don't worry, I have a great routine worked out.
Y2J: great.
Steph: I've called it the Macarena.
Y2J: Super,
Steph: Chris?
Y2J: er. . . yes?
Steph: Can I have a good luck kiss?
Y2J: No!
Steph: PLEASE!!!!
Y2J: NO!!!
Steph: I won't do the dance routine if you don't!!!!
Y2J: (quickly weighs up which is worse. A) Kissing Stephanie B) giving HHH daily foot massages until middle school) Um. . . ok then. . . but don't tell anybody.
(He kisses her on the cheek)
Steph: DO IT PROPERLY!!!
Y2J: (shudders) ok
(he kisses Stephanie on the lips and then runs off pretending to be sick)
Steph: (swoons) CHRISSY!!!
*************************
Dance Routine
*************************
Tazz: First up, THE KINDERGARTEN GIRLS!!!
Kindergarteners: YAY!
(Music starts, it's "Macarena" by Los del Rios. Stephanie, Trish, Stacy, Lita and Molly all do the Macarena to raucous applause)
Tazz: Now the second grade girls!
Michael Cole: I didn't know there were any.
Tazz: well there they are Cole!
(HHH and Kane walk on in Wigs and Skirts.)
HHH: (falsetto voice) Hello! I am Huntara and this is Kaneianna. This is our dance routine.
(They skip around in circles for about 5 minutes then curtsey)
HHH: Tada!!!
(Kindergarteners laugh uncontrollably, HHH glares at them)
Tazz: Your winners THE KINDERGARTENERS!!!
(Mad applause)
Tazz: This means we go to a one-on-one wrestling match between HHH and. . .
Rock: UNDERTAKER!!!
Tazz: WHAT?
Rock: Undertaker is our contestant for the wrestling match.
HHH: ARGH!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Taker: Let's go!!!
Arianna: Get Him Taker!!!!
(Undertaker Punches HHH who falls over and cries.)
HHH: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Tazz: Your winner UNDERTAKER!!!
Michael Cole: And your overall winners KINDERGARTEN!
Kindergarteners: Wahoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Mr. McMahon: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON OUT HERE!!!!
Y2J: We were having a sports festival,
Mr. McMahon: All of you go home now!!!
All: aw..!
Mr. McMahon: NOW DAMMIT!!!
All: Ok.
(they leave)
*************************
Recess the next day
*************************
(Rock and Y2J stretch out on the tarmac while HHH massages their feet. Across the climbing frame Big show polishes all the kindergarteners shoes and Kane reads a story book to the girls)
Kane: Once upon a time there were some wrestlers. . .
Steph: Wrestlers? COOL!
Y2J: YAY wrestling!
Rock: I know, let's ALL be wrestlers.
(All pause in thought)
All: Nah! Boring!!!
**************************
HHH: I have a plan!
Big Show: I'm sick of your plans.
Kane: I'm sick of you!
(they walk off leaving HHH to do all the work)
HHH: what????
Rock: Get to work maggot!!!!
HHH: Yes.
Rock: Yes what?
HHH: (sighs) yes SIR
Rock: (To Y2J) I think the rest of this year is going to be fun.
Y2J: Me too actually.
(Steph comes up to Y2J and snuggles up to him)
Steph: Chrissy Darling! Aren't you coming to my picnic!
Y2J: Sure I am sweety! (Winks at Rock) This semester is gonna RULE!
Author's note: It's finally over! Please review. I hope you had as much fun reading it as I had writing it.
Lots of luv
Harriet
(Anikathepen)
********************
First period
********************
Ms Marie: Ok, it's time to read out your state assignments. Christian, you can go first
Christian: California is very sunny. The capital of California is Sunnydale where Buffy the vampire slayer lives. . .
Ms Marie: WHAT? Christian! Where did you get all of THIS from?
Christian: (nervously) UPN?
Ms Marie: Well done (write an "F" in her mark book) Now Booker,
Booker T: Maine is very cold and is. . .
**********************
55 mins later
*********************
Ms Marie : Ok everyone well done, time for Recess.
*********************
Recess (by the climbing frame)
*********************
Y2J: Ok everyone, the final battle will take place after school today. We will compete in the following events, (reads list) 100 metres, long jump, triple jump, gymnastics and dance routine. . . DANCE ROUTINE!!!
Steph: Yes! I asked HHH if we could!
Y2J: Ok, FINE! Just don't make ME join in.
Rock: And if the competition goes to a tie, a WRESTLING match between the team captains/
(all cheer)
Y2J: We'll pick our teams at lunchtime, go train everybody.
(everyone starts doing star jumps)
***********************
Behind the bike shed
***********************
HHH: (sings) Taker and Arianna, sittin' in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
Taker: (yells) SHUT UP!
Arianna: Make him stop Mark!
Taker: Shut up Hunter!
HHH: make me!
(Taker pushes him over)
HHH: OWWWWWW! I'm telling!
(HHH runs off)
Arianna: Why do you hang around with those people! I don't like them!
Taker: I don't really like them either.
Arianna: Then why do you still hang around with them.
Taker: Because . . .
Arianna: Because what?
Taker: I don't know. . . I don't even WANT to be their friend.
Arianna: Then don't.
Taker: hmmm. . . . .
*****************
By the climbing frame
*****************
Y2J: We need a song.
Rock: What?
Y2J: a theme song for our team, all great sports teams have one.
Rock: Ok, any ideas?
Y2J: 99 cans of whoop-ass on the wall, 99 cans of whoop-ass, take one down, pass it around, 98 cans of whoop-ass on the wall. . .
Rock: Great! Let's get the team together and teach it to them!
(Taker enters)
Rock: ARGH! Run run!
Y2J: HELP!
Taker: I'm not here to hurt you!
Y2J: Really?
Taker: I want to join your team.
Y2J: YAY!
****************
Start of sports festival
****************
Y2J: Before the festival starts we shall sing our group anthem.
All: Ninety-nine can of whoop-ass on the wall. . .
***************
4 hours later
***************
All: 3 cans of whoop-ass on the wall, 3 can of whoop-ass
HHH: STOP! I can't take anymore!
Y2J: You interrupted! Now we have to start again!
All: ninety nine cans of whoop-ass on the wall. . .
**************
4 hours later
**************
Y2J: Take one down, pass it around, no more cans of whoop-ass on the wall!
HHH: Thank God!
Rock: Now we can start the sports festival. 100 metres first.
(Cut to two kids at a desk with toy microphones)
Michael Cole: And here we have the 100 metres race a crucial face off between Kurt Angle and Kane.
Tazz: Oh this is gonna be good Cole.
(Kurt and Kane line up)
Rock: Ready set GO!
(They run, Angle is winning but the Kane chokeslams him and overtakes. Angle gets up and keeps running and overtakes Kane on the last 5 metres. Angle crosses finish line first but as he celebtreates Kane chokeslams him)
Angle: OW!
(That's for Ashley who said I should beat up Angle coz he talked too much)
Michael Cole: The winner of the first event is Kurt Angle!
Tazz: That gives the kindergarteners an early lead 1-0.
Michael Cole: Now for the second event. GYMNASTICS!
******************
Molly Holly and Big Show line up
******************
Tazz: Big Show, on the count of three, do your routine. One, two THREE!
(Big show does a forward roll, second graders clap)
Tazz: Ok, now Molly, Ready set GO!
(Molly does a triple backflip, a tuck somersault then cartwheels in a circle before doing a handstand to finish, Kindergarteners applaud Raucously)
Michael Cole: YOUR WINNER MOLLY!!!!
Tazz gives the kindergarteners a 2-0 lead Cole!
Michael Cole: Now we will take a short break, join us again in 10 minutes.
**********************
Kindergartener's Team talk
**********************
Rock: Ok, we're doing great so far. It would take some real bad luck for us to lose.
Y2J: (Writing list) Foot massage, shoe cleaning, homework doing, backpack carrying. . .
Rock: Dude? What are you doing?
Y2J: I'm making a list of all the things I want HHH to do once he's my personal slave.
Rock: (cackles) Yeah, this is gonna be great.
Hurricane: It's my event next, long jump!!!
Rock: Think you can win?
Hurricane: Of course, I can FLY!
Rock: oh boy,
Hurricane: (indignantly) I CAN!!!
Rock: Ok then, go fly coz it's your event Superman!
Hurricane: I'm NOT SUPERMAN!!!
Rock: Fine, fine
*****************
Tazz: Will the Long jump contestants please line up.
(Big Show and Hurricane line up)
Tazz: Hurricane, ready set GO!!!
(Hurricane jumps a short distance)
Tazz: Big show, GO!
(Big show takes one step forward and steps right past hurricane because he is so big)
Hurricane: HEY!!!
Tazz: That's perfectly rule abiding, BIG SHOW IS THE WINNER!!!
Michael Cole: The 2nd graders pull back to 2-1!
Tazz: Now for the triple jump.
(Hurricane and Big show line up again and the same thing happens)
Tazz: Your winner, BIG SHOW!!!
Michael: Now it's a 2-2 draw Tazz.
Tazz: Let's hope the kindergarteners have something up their sleeves.
*********************
Kindergarteners team talk
********************
Steph: We have something up our sleeves right?
Rock: Yes.
Lita: Well what is it?
Y2J: Look at the second grader's team and count them.
Steph: (on fingers) HHH, one, Kane, two, Big Show, three. HEY! Where's Undertaker?!
Rock and Y2J: (laugh evilly) MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You'll see.
********************
Second Grader's team talk
********************
HHH: (to kane) Where's Undertaker?
Kane: I dunno.
HHH: Big show?
Big Show: I dunno.
HHH: Oh poopy pants!!! He's gone off somewhere and we need him!!!
****************
Michael Cole: Now it's time for the Pole vault.
Tazz: We'll pit Jeff Hardy against Kane!
(Jeff does his jump and clears the bar)
Kindergarteners: YAY!
(Kane does his jump and knocks the bar over)
Kindergarteners: YAY!!!
(HHH runs over with a second grader.)
HHH: This is Earl Hebner, he's our referee!
Earl Hebner: Kane is the winner!!!
Kindergarteners: (Chant) YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF! YOU SCREWED JEFF!
Earl Hebner: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
(He runs off)
HHH: Earl's decision stands! We win Pole vault!
Kindergarteners: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Second graders: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
Tazz: It's now 3-2 to the second graders
Michael Cole: This looks bad for the kindergarteners Tazz.
Tazz: Well Duh!
*******************
Kindergartener's Team talk
*******************
Y2J: Steph, you have to win the dance routine or we've lost!!!
Steph: Don't worry, I have a great routine worked out.
Y2J: great.
Steph: I've called it the Macarena.
Y2J: Super,
Steph: Chris?
Y2J: er. . . yes?
Steph: Can I have a good luck kiss?
Y2J: No!
Steph: PLEASE!!!!
Y2J: NO!!!
Steph: I won't do the dance routine if you don't!!!!
Y2J: (quickly weighs up which is worse. A) Kissing Stephanie B) giving HHH daily foot massages until middle school) Um. . . ok then. . . but don't tell anybody.
(He kisses her on the cheek)
Steph: DO IT PROPERLY!!!
Y2J: (shudders) ok
(he kisses Stephanie on the lips and then runs off pretending to be sick)
Steph: (swoons) CHRISSY!!!
*************************
Dance Routine
*************************
Tazz: First up, THE KINDERGARTEN GIRLS!!!
Kindergarteners: YAY!
(Music starts, it's "Macarena" by Los del Rios. Stephanie, Trish, Stacy, Lita and Molly all do the Macarena to raucous applause)
Tazz: Now the second grade girls!
Michael Cole: I didn't know there were any.
Tazz: well there they are Cole!
(HHH and Kane walk on in Wigs and Skirts.)
HHH: (falsetto voice) Hello! I am Huntara and this is Kaneianna. This is our dance routine.
(They skip around in circles for about 5 minutes then curtsey)
HHH: Tada!!!
(Kindergarteners laugh uncontrollably, HHH glares at them)
Tazz: Your winners THE KINDERGARTENERS!!!
(Mad applause)
Tazz: This means we go to a one-on-one wrestling match between HHH and. . .
Rock: UNDERTAKER!!!
Tazz: WHAT?
Rock: Undertaker is our contestant for the wrestling match.
HHH: ARGH!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Taker: Let's go!!!
Arianna: Get Him Taker!!!!
(Undertaker Punches HHH who falls over and cries.)
HHH: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Tazz: Your winner UNDERTAKER!!!
Michael Cole: And your overall winners KINDERGARTEN!
Kindergarteners: Wahoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Mr. McMahon: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON OUT HERE!!!!
Y2J: We were having a sports festival,
Mr. McMahon: All of you go home now!!!
All: aw..!
Mr. McMahon: NOW DAMMIT!!!
All: Ok.
(they leave)
*************************
Recess the next day
*************************
(Rock and Y2J stretch out on the tarmac while HHH massages their feet. Across the climbing frame Big show polishes all the kindergarteners shoes and Kane reads a story book to the girls)
Kane: Once upon a time there were some wrestlers. . .
Steph: Wrestlers? COOL!
Y2J: YAY wrestling!
Rock: I know, let's ALL be wrestlers.
(All pause in thought)
All: Nah! Boring!!!
**************************
HHH: I have a plan!
Big Show: I'm sick of your plans.
Kane: I'm sick of you!
(they walk off leaving HHH to do all the work)
HHH: what????
Rock: Get to work maggot!!!!
HHH: Yes.
Rock: Yes what?
HHH: (sighs) yes SIR
Rock: (To Y2J) I think the rest of this year is going to be fun.
Y2J: Me too actually.
(Steph comes up to Y2J and snuggles up to him)
Steph: Chrissy Darling! Aren't you coming to my picnic!
Y2J: Sure I am sweety! (Winks at Rock) This semester is gonna RULE!
Author's note: It's finally over! Please review. I hope you had as much fun reading it as I had writing it.
Lots of luv
Harriet
(Anikathepen)