Pairings: SenRu; SenKosh ::waves SenKosh banners wildly::
Notes: I'm not really a SenRu fan (make a wild guess what pairing I support ::waves X banners wildly:: ^_^) but I thought I'd write a kind of side-fic to Colleague (don't know what I'm talking about? Look at the list of stories then you'll see the fic). This will be a bit angsty but not much, as I dislike anything relatively heart-breaking. Just Koshino musing on his standing with Sendoh's infatuation (I'm biased, I know) with Rukawa.
Warning: Language, boy+boy love—as if you didn't already know! ^_____^
Disclaimers: I have powerful people backing me up with what I do—screw the fact that they're imaginary—so you better be careful when you sue. As usual, I don't own these delicious bishounen, I'm merely borrowing them for a while. Sue me then prepare yourself for retribution. ::readies flame thrower:: Make…my…day.
Your Sun and Your MoonBy Kuroi Tenshi
The sun slowly disappeared into the faint red-orange sky. The last rays of the setting sun gave little warmth as a gentle breeze picked up, causing the short raven-black strands to dance with the wind. The sky was gradually darkening and it would be mere minutes before total darkness then light would come from the sky, provided by the moon and the million stars scattered across the horizon.
"See you tomorrow, Kaede-kun!"
Another afternoon wasted. Another afternoon spent watching Sendoh pathetically attempt to catch the stoic basketball player's heart. Another afternoon endured with a knife thrust deeper.
Koshino Hiroaki looked away, keeping his eyes trained on the trees and shrubbery that was everywhere. His voice was dripping of pure hero-worship, it was pathetic. He leaned against the metal railing and sighed impatiently.
He didn't know why he even agreed to come anyway. He detested the sight of his best friend throwing himself all over the rival team's ace's feet and practically licking every toe on his feet. He disliked (immensely, actually) Rukawa's casual indifference to the precious gift Sendoh offered him: his heart.
But most of all, he hated with vehemence the pain that clawed his very core whenever he saw his best friend within a mile of the one he offered his love to.
When he was sure Rukawa was well out of sight and the puddle of drool by his friend's feet had dried up, he walked toward him and offered a small smile. "Lost another match?"
Sendoh merely blinked at him, still with the goofy expression on his face. After a heartbeat or two, he shrugged. "Thanks for the support, Kosh. Even though I lost this match, I think I'm progressing a bit, don't you think?"
He was about to argue that beating him yet again and pounding him into dust wasn't exactly the conventional way of showing interest when he spoke again and all line of reason left him in a moment of stupor.
"He agreed to go out with me again this weekend."
"That's…" fucked up, he said in his mind, "great." I need another session with Hanamichi. It's time to gather the broken-hearted and still in-denial club. Then we'd probably end up shadowing them on their date. How pathetic can one get?
"I really think he's interested in me," Sendoh said softly, a faint blush coloring his smooth creamy cheeks. They started walking toward the street lined up with diners and small shops. "I know you've already heard this a million times," he said, rolling his eyes at me, "but I feel different when I'm around him. He's different."
By this time, I learned to tune him out when he was talking about Him. Him. HIM. HIM. It was always about him. I guess I shouldn't let this affect me too much. I mean, before, Sendoh was already always jabbering about Rukawa. How well he played, how he'd like to play against him again someday.
There was once a time we both shared the same dream concerning the Shohoku Ace. We both dreamed that one day we would be able to defeat him and his strong team. That one day it would be our team in the IH instead of theirs.
Funny that until a year ago, I wasn't even interested in basketball. It was just a silly ball game then before I met Sendoh. He showed me the depth of the game. I learned from him that basketball could be something other than a sport. It could be your life.
But unlike him, I wasn't gifted as he was. I could play well, but never beyond what was normal. I didn't have it to make basketball my life. But Sendoh did. And I was happy just knowing he had it and supporting him. That was enough.
Then he met Rukawa Kaede. Rukawa had it, too. Basketball was Rukawa's life, it was pretty obvious. And from defeating him, Sendoh wanted to be with him. I don't know when exactly that happened but I knew it even before he did.
It's always been that way since we met at the first day of classes. I would always stand at the back, observe him, support him then notice things about him. I was Koshino Hiroaki, Sendoh Akira's personal one-man cheering squad. I would always be behind him, urging him to go forward and relentlessly cheering him on.
But does he even notice? Sometimes, I guess. My ego wouldn't take it too lightly if my existence had been entirely overlooked. Not that I'd mind, when you think about it, but it would hurt. But I've grown accustomed to it.
What's a one-man scowling cheering team to the handsome embodiment of basketball, his life?
That's right. Rukawa embodies the game for him.
Which brings me back to the same dream we once shared. We both saw Rukawa as a challenge then, nothing more. Basketball didn't mean as much to me as it did to Sendoh but it didn't mean it was completely nothing to me. It gave me a purpose, breathed life into my otherwise insipid existence. It gave me something to look forward to, a means of venting whatever anger, frustration or fear that I have; it gave me a purpose.
It holds true for the both of us; Rukawa was basketball epitomized.
Only we embraced that fact in different ways. Sure, like the moon gets its light from the sun, basketball gave me life. But like the moon orbits the earth, my life doesn't revolve around it.
Sendoh's case was different. He was sunny; he thrived in sunshine. He was trapped in the sun's orbit as I am ensnared in my own path revolving around him.
I snapped out of my trance-like state and glance irritably at him, realizing he had been trying to get my attention for the past five minutes. "What?"
"I said I can't wait for tomorrow," he replied with that impossible smile of his. Did he know how much power he held over me merely with one of his smiles like that? Perhaps not. If he did, he never let on.
"You'd like that, won't you?" I asked, still looking irritated but hurting inside. "Because with tomorrow's promise of sunshine, you'd be dragging me across town just so you can play one on one against Rukawa, right?"
He just gave me that stupid grin. I sighed, letting him see my exasperation but never letting on the secret pain. That's right. He is your sun after all. But during the night when your sun is not around to shield you from the darkness, I will be here, your moon, with my borrowed light, to guide you and light your way until the first rays of your beloved sun shyly glides through for another day.
High above, the silver moon peeked from beneath the clouds, casting its light on the odd pair of young men walking side by side along a crowded street, gleaming spherical body seeming to follow them with each step that they take.
Fin
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Well? Did it make sense at all? ^^;; Please tell me. Any form of response is always much welcome. ^_^