Broke!- Chapter 5: No, the Streets Aren't A Pretty Place
JK: Hi everyone!
Yami: MEAGER?! MEAGER?! YOU FOOLISH MORTALS! I WILL TAKE YOU BY YOUR TOES AND HANG YOU FROM A CLIFF! THEN I WILL ROAST YOUR BRAINS AND USE IT AS HAMBURGER MEAT!
JK: Yami, shut up! You moron! You want me to raise the rating so everyone that you're ticking off can curse you out without censors?
Yami: MORTALS! YOU SHALL ALL BOW DOWN BEFORE ME!
(Malik decided to take the matter into his own hands. He uses the Millennium Rod to control Yami. Yami then takes a mallet and whacks his own head. He faints.)
JK: Thank you, Malik!
Malik: Sure. (Bows to JK.)
JK: I could get used to this.
Isis: I hope you die, Kaiba!
Seto: Why am I constantly getting death threats?
JK: What did you say to her now?
Seto: That she should pay more attention to my desire for the God Cards.
Isis: Oh, if I had Malik's powers I would so hurt you! Or, get you to hurt yourself.
Seto: But you don't! Ha! In your face!
Mokuba: You fight like an old married couple!
Isis and Seto: Keep out of this, you immature bed-wetting punk!
JK: When they say their insults in perfect synchrony, you know they like eachother.
Isis and Seto: We do not! Stop mimicking me! I said stop! I will hurt you! Yeah right!
JK: Okay, people, I get it. Just stop doing that.
Isis and Seto: Okay then!
JK: Oh, god...
Yami: Hiya!
JK: You sure take naps quickly.
Yami: I know.
JK: Okay, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh or any of the characters. But I do own this idea...
Seto (sarcastically): Oh, what joy!
JK: Seto...
Seto: I'm not going to shut up! I am not your puppet! I will not shut up!
JK: I can see that.
Seto: Good! Because I-
Yami (hungrily): Just start the story!
"Mokuba, didn't Seto ever get you help for this problem?" asked Isis wearily.
"He wet my bed! That disgusting moron wet my bed! And I had to sleep on the couch!" screamed Malik, "How come he took my place?!"
"Just shut up, Malik. He's only going to be here for a little while until Seto can figure out a way to get his money back from Yami," said Isis, "In the meantime, Mokuba, change the covers. I don't have servants, so you're going to have to take care of your own chores."
"Isis, are you mad at me?" asked Mokuba.
"Just change the covers! And you're sleeping on the couch tomorrow!" screamed Malik.
"I didn't know your name was Isis," said Isis, "No, Mokuba, I'm not mad at you."
"But I am, you disgusting brother-of-a-"
"Malik, I am warning you," said Isis.
"Oh, sorry. I almost insulted your boyfriend!"
"Do you want me to kick you out again?" asked Isis.
"I'll get the popcorn!" Mokuba said gleefully. When Isis and Malik started arguing, it went on for hours. It was also very interesting.
Seto, of course, wasn't happy. He was forced to sleep on a bench, and he was now wandering around, looking for a place to get food. Then he had an idea. Seto dug through a few garbage cans until he found a piece of paper and a marker. On it he wrote, "Will work for food and money." After he peeled the food off it to make it look halfway presentable, he sat on the sidewalk and held it up. This is so brandishing to my dignity, he thought gloomily.
Seto probably sat there for hours, but no one offered him a job or shelter of any sort. He eventually dozed off, but a familiar voice awoke him.
"Look, Isis, it's a bum! Can I throw rocks at him?" came the voice.
"NO, Mokuba," said Isis.
"But he's so pathetic looking!" continued Mokuba.
"No, Mokuba," said Isis.
"Please!" begged Mokuba.
"Tell you what. I'll let you throw rocks at Malik. Okay?" offered Isis.
"Okay! But can I give him a dollar?" asked Mokuba.
"Fine. Here," said Isis, giving Mokuba a dollar. Mokuba ran over to Seto, but Seto shielded his eyes.
"Here, mister!" said Mokuba, handing Seto a dollar. Seto took it happily, making a mental note to repay Isis. Mokuba, however, didn't seem to want to leave. Isis had to come over there.
"Mokuba, we have to go. Sorry, sir, he's a bit high-strung," explained Isis. He didn't fool her, though. Seto could wear a dress, make- up, and a wig for all she cared, she'd still know it was him. But for Mokuba's sake, she wouldn't say anything.
"I'll repay you one day," said Seto, making his voice deeper. Oh, great, now I sound like an old man, thought Seto.
"I'm sure you will," said Isis, smiling. And with that, she grabbed Mokuba's hand and walked away from Seto. Seto frowned and sighed. No one had offered him a job. He was presentable; he didn't smell yet. His clothes weren't torn. So what was the problem? Wait, maybe that was the problem. He needed some ugly clothes. Perhaps people thought he was faking being homeless. And for the clothes, there was only one person to turn to...
Seto rang Yugi's doorbell fervently. He needed clothes! That puny idiot better be home, thought Seto, Well at least Yami won't be there. He's too busy spending my money. Finally, Yugi answered the door.
"Kaiba? What a pleasant surp-"
"Skip the introductions. I'm not here for a tea party. This is strictly business," said Seto.
"Okay, then. What do you want?" asked Yugi.
"Can I borrow some of your clothes?" asked Seto quickly.
"Excuse me?"
"I mean the clothes that are too big on you."
"Why don't you come in?" asked Yugi reluctantly. Seto needed to sit down, he had been walking for hours. Why did Yugi have to live so far away? Seto entered the house and sat down.
"Well if it ain't Kaiba," said a voice.
"Hello, Chihuahua," said Seto, not even looking up.
"I am not a Chihuahua!" screamed Joey.
"Aren't you late for your rabies vaccinations?" asked Seto.
"Why you-"
"Actually, we're waiting for Yami to arrive. He's coming in a limo! We're going to go for a joy ride through the city. Then he's taking me, and only me, shopping!" said Tea dreamily.
"Reality check, hag. He's probably going to ditch you at the mall," said Seto. Luckily, before Tea had time to reply, Yugi arrived carrying some clothes. Seto grimaced. He couldn't believe that he had to wear that!
"Here Seto, I managed to find something that might fit you. My parents bought this for me, and they hardly know I exist so you can't expect them to know my size."
"Maybe they figured you were the same size as most normal fifteen- year-olds," said Seto, "Never mind. At least now I can pass as a homeless person."
"That's it, Kaiba! Prepare to be hurt very badly!" screamed Tea.
"Yugi scares me more than you do, Tea," said Seto calmly. With that, he got up to leave. But whom should he meet at the door but Yami?
"Having fun, Kaiba?" asked Yami, "I know I am."
"Mark my words, you moron. I will get my revenge!" Seto pushed Yami out of his way and proceeded out the door.
"I hate him! Stupid Pharaoh!" screamed Seto. A few people stopped to stare at him. After all, this was the 21st century. Pharaohs didn't exist anymore, so this person couldn't have known any personally.
"Wait, aren't you Seto Kaiba?" asked a teenage girl.
"No, I'm his twin brother," said Seto.
"You know, I think your brother is so cool! The way he pushed his step father out the window...so cool! But he was a real ditz to lose his money to Yugi Mutou. You know, he's way cuter than you are. Are you sure you're his twin brother? Anyway, I can't believe that Isis Ishtar invited him to a private exhibition that day! I bet they secretly went out or something. Oh, and you know what? I so totally wish I had his autograph! Do you think you could get one for me? Maybe you could get him to meet me in person! That would be so cool! My boyfriend would get really angry though. I don't know if you know him, but his name is Joey Wheeler. Ever heard of him? I don't think you have, he is such a commoner! Wait whatever happened to your brother? Is he living outside? I hope so. Maybe I can invite him to live with me! I could give him Joey's house! Maybe we'll get married and I'll get a BIG wedding with a lot of people! What do you think?" the girl rattled on and on.
"Well, I'd advise you not to hold your breath. Seto Kaiba doesn't go for people like you!" said Seto angrily.
"Oh, I knew it! He's taken, isn't he? By who? I bet it's that Ishtar girl! Is it?" asked the hyper teenager. Seto turned crimson.
"Well, no, he's not taken. But I'll say it again. Why would he go for someone like you? I mean, you fit more words into one minute than anyone I've ever met," said Seto, "I don't think he'd fit one word in."
"Well, I bet he's not as big a jerk as you are! Oh, wait, can I have your autograph?" she asked hopefully.
"No," said Seto. He walked away from her. That was by far the most annoying thing that had happened to him. But what bothered him most was the fact that people already knew about his huge blunder. Yami would really pay for this! Seto entered a restaurant and snuck into the bathroom. There he changed into Yugi's disgusting clothes. Seto looked in the mirror, horrified at his reflection. He was wearing ugly non-designer jeans that were to short to be pants, too long to be shorts. He was also wearing an ugly t-shirt that was too short as well. Oh, great, it looks like I'm wearing a belly shirt. Now people are going to think that I'm gay! He thought. To make himself look better, he pulled on the jacket Yugi had given him. Luckily, that wasn't too short. He sighed and snuck out.
It was getting hot, and Seto sat on a bench in the shade of a tree. He held up his sign again. People passed by, not even paying attention to him. He figured it was his sign that was the problem. He crossed out the word money so the sign read "Will work for food."
He sat there, pathetically holding the sign. He was about to doze off again when something wet landed on his head.
"Oh, crap!" he yelled, tugging at his hair. His suspicions were confirmed. He had bird poop in his hair! Seto ripped off a piece of the pants he was wearing and did his best to clean it out.
As he was cleaning his hair, someone ran out of nowhere and jumped onto him.
"Big brother!" squealed Mokuba, hugging Seto fervently.
"Mokuba, get off me," said Seto. But even though he sounded indifferent, Seto hugged Mokuba back. Isis ran over there.
"Mokuba! I told you not to run across the street! How does Seto control you?" asked Isis.
"I found Seto!" cried Mokuba happily.
"Nice choice of miss-matched clothes, Seto. Oh, and I like the little accessory in your hair," said Isis, smirking.
"Ha ha, very funny. Don't you have a lunatic to be baby-sitting?" asked Seto.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" asked Isis. Mokuba understood the joke, and laughed. Seto, of course, understood the joke, and screamed.
"Shut up! I bet insanity runs in your family, and that's why you're so stupid," Isis looked like a teapot that was boiling for so long it was on the verge of exploding.
"Have fun in the streets, Seto! Because I would rather die before helping you! And I'm sure all the other people you know feel the same way!" she screamed, "Come on, Mokuba. Let's go."
"So I guess this means you're not getting married, huh?" said Mokuba, looking at his feet.
"No, Mokuba," said Isis and Seto in unison. (A/N: They do that a lot, don't they?)
"Oh," said Mokuba, "Bye Seto." Isis was anxious to leave, and she tugged at his hand.
"Let's go Mokuba!" she said unhappily.
"Bye Mokuba," said Seto. Mokuba once again nudged Isis, but Isis chose to ignore it this time. Just as they were about to leave, a limousine pulled over. The back window opened, and Yami looked out.
"Hop in, Isis! I'll give you a lift," said Yami, attempting to be cool. (A/N: I don't get it. I always make Yami seem like a total loser. Oh well. Back to the story.)
Isis took a look at the other people in the car, and saw Joey, Tristan, and none other than Malik! He must be drunk, thought Isis.
"Hey, sissy! What up? I was just hangin' with my buds. Wanna come?" said Malik. His words were barely decipherable, so Isis was sure he was drunk.
Malik turned green in the face and then retched in a CLEAR plastic bag.
"Aw, man, I told you not to mix beer with cognac!" screamed Joey, moving away from Malik. Malik continued retching violently.
"Yugi is such a wimp. That was so much fun! I can't believe he refused to come," said Yami.
"Oh, and when you ditched Tea at the mall, too cool!" said Malik, who had finally stopped retching.
"No, thanks, I have my own car," said Isis, not wanting to hear, or see, anymore of this.
"Come on sissy, chill wid us!" Malik said.
"Number one, get rid of that stupid Brooklyn accent. Number two, don't ever call me sissy again. And number three, I would rather date Kaiba than join you and your moronic friends!" screamed Isis.
"Oh, I knew it! You like that rich-"
"Mokuba is right here, Malik. And we wouldn't want him hearing any bad words," said Isis quickly, "Now, excuse me while I go search for a bit of sanity. Oh, and Malik, why don't you sleep at Yami's new house? There's plenty of room. Or sleep in the streets for all I care. Just don't come home."
"Wait, how do you know that?" asked Malik suspiciously.
"Know what?"
"That Seto's house is big! I knew you've been there! Okay, that's it! I'm going to watch you like a hawk! He's too young for you Isis! You can't be-"
"Malik, shut up!" said Isis, looking around. The last think she needed was for Seto to hear all of this. But to her surprise...and relief, Seto was no where in sight.
"Well, Mokuba, we better get going," said Isis. And with that, she and Mokuba walked away.
"Such morons," Isis muttered under her breath.
To say the least, Seto was disgusted. His money, the money he had devoted most of his life to acquiring, was being spent on- he didn't even want to think about it. What more could go wrong in one day? Well, he was about to find out.
Without even realizing it, Seto had wandered into an alleyway. People began to follow him. Seto, wallowing in his misery, didn't even notice. Until one of them spoke.
"Seto Kaiba!" Seto seemed to wake up.
"What?" he asked, turning around. But he didn't like who he saw...
...it was quite plainly some of Malik's rare hunters. And just because Seto was broke, didn't mean that he wasn't snobby.
"Ah, I see. Your leader goes off and gets drop dead drunk, and leaves you goons to do his dirty work. And I presume you want my rare cards?" he said.
"Yes, we do."
"Well, I'm not sorry to inform you, but I don't have them," said Seto, beginning to walk away from Malik's slaves. On of them swiftly stepped in front of him.
"Kaiba, we could do this the hard way," he said.
"Or, I could drop you where you stand," said Seto, glaring at the Rare Hunter. He was definitely not to be trifled with today. Actually, any day when he was living outside.
Someone tried to land a blow on Seto's head from behind, but he was well prepared and ducked. He spotted a standard kitchen knife on the ground lying in a pile of garbage, and he quickly picked up. Seto grabbed the person closest to him, and put the knife near his neck.
"You step away, or your colleague dies," he said. And he was full willing to hurt them all. The Rare Hunters were strongly reminded of their leader, Malik Ishtar.
"Hey, Kaiba!" said a very happy voice. Seto turned around, his hand never leaving the Rare Hunter's neck. But Seto didn't really know what happened next. But his last thought was, "Ow."
As it turned out, drunken Malik Ishtar had arrived at the scene. When he hit Seto over the head with a broken (and heavy) lamp, he didn't really realize what he was doing. It just seemed like it was something he had been wanting to do for a long time. But to a different person...an older person...a few millennia older person...
"Hey peeps!" said Malik. His workers stared at him fearfully.
"What?" he asked stupidly. One of them finally had the courage to speak.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked.
"What? Oh, you mean why I knocked out my future brother-in law? I don't know. It seemed like a good idea.
"Okay," they said. The Rare Hunters decided to leave their insane leader. And that's just what they did.
Tea came running toward Malik.
"Oh, great! Have you seen Yami? I really want to give him a piece of my mind! I cannot believe he ditched me! That arrogant Seto Kaiba was right!" she screamed. Tea was about to say something else, but she spotted Kaiba.
"What happened to him?"
"I hit him," said Malik coolly.
"Whatever. Have you seen Yami, then?" she asked.
"He's back at the car. Why?" asked Malik. Tea felt that Malik needed help, and she should be his friend, blah blah blah blah blah. So she started to drag him toward where he said the car should be.
"Yami! You moron! How dare you ditch me and fulfill Kaiba's prophecy?!" she screamed, pushing Malik in.
"Oh, sorry. I just forgot you were there," Yami lied.
"Oh, okay then!" she said, swooning. Yami thought, Where's a camera when you need one? Wait, what's a camera?
"Isis, where will Seto sleep?!" asked Mokuba worriedly.
"He'll find a place to sleep, don't you worry Mokuba," she said. Mokuba continued to stare out the window.
"But what if he gets hurt? Oh, Isis!" Mokuba began to cry.
"Mokuba, Seto's a pretty good fighter. He'll be fine in the event that he gets attacked," she said. This calmed Mokuba a bit. But how very wrong she was...
JK: That was so corny.
Seto: How dare you knock me out, you hideous excuse for a human being?!
Malik: Hey, I was drunk.
Seto: I'm sure you were.
Malik: Fine don't believe me.
Seto (to JK): I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!
JK: You're going to hate me even more once you find out who you're going to work for...
Seto: No, not-
JK: Yes, him.
Seto: I hate you! I hate you!
JK: Hey, you don't know what the final outcome of the story will be.
Seto: I better not have any bruises on my face.
(JK laughs nervously.)
Seto: Don't tell me that I will have bruises on my face!
JK: Okay, I won't.
Isis: Ha ha! You're going to look even uglier now!
Seto: Shut up, sister of an insane person!
Isis: Was that an insult?
JK: Okay, please review while I keep these "enemies" from killing eachother. Oh, and by the way, I'm sorry if I offended anyone's opinions in this story!
JK: Hi everyone!
Yami: MEAGER?! MEAGER?! YOU FOOLISH MORTALS! I WILL TAKE YOU BY YOUR TOES AND HANG YOU FROM A CLIFF! THEN I WILL ROAST YOUR BRAINS AND USE IT AS HAMBURGER MEAT!
JK: Yami, shut up! You moron! You want me to raise the rating so everyone that you're ticking off can curse you out without censors?
Yami: MORTALS! YOU SHALL ALL BOW DOWN BEFORE ME!
(Malik decided to take the matter into his own hands. He uses the Millennium Rod to control Yami. Yami then takes a mallet and whacks his own head. He faints.)
JK: Thank you, Malik!
Malik: Sure. (Bows to JK.)
JK: I could get used to this.
Isis: I hope you die, Kaiba!
Seto: Why am I constantly getting death threats?
JK: What did you say to her now?
Seto: That she should pay more attention to my desire for the God Cards.
Isis: Oh, if I had Malik's powers I would so hurt you! Or, get you to hurt yourself.
Seto: But you don't! Ha! In your face!
Mokuba: You fight like an old married couple!
Isis and Seto: Keep out of this, you immature bed-wetting punk!
JK: When they say their insults in perfect synchrony, you know they like eachother.
Isis and Seto: We do not! Stop mimicking me! I said stop! I will hurt you! Yeah right!
JK: Okay, people, I get it. Just stop doing that.
Isis and Seto: Okay then!
JK: Oh, god...
Yami: Hiya!
JK: You sure take naps quickly.
Yami: I know.
JK: Okay, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh or any of the characters. But I do own this idea...
Seto (sarcastically): Oh, what joy!
JK: Seto...
Seto: I'm not going to shut up! I am not your puppet! I will not shut up!
JK: I can see that.
Seto: Good! Because I-
Yami (hungrily): Just start the story!
"Mokuba, didn't Seto ever get you help for this problem?" asked Isis wearily.
"He wet my bed! That disgusting moron wet my bed! And I had to sleep on the couch!" screamed Malik, "How come he took my place?!"
"Just shut up, Malik. He's only going to be here for a little while until Seto can figure out a way to get his money back from Yami," said Isis, "In the meantime, Mokuba, change the covers. I don't have servants, so you're going to have to take care of your own chores."
"Isis, are you mad at me?" asked Mokuba.
"Just change the covers! And you're sleeping on the couch tomorrow!" screamed Malik.
"I didn't know your name was Isis," said Isis, "No, Mokuba, I'm not mad at you."
"But I am, you disgusting brother-of-a-"
"Malik, I am warning you," said Isis.
"Oh, sorry. I almost insulted your boyfriend!"
"Do you want me to kick you out again?" asked Isis.
"I'll get the popcorn!" Mokuba said gleefully. When Isis and Malik started arguing, it went on for hours. It was also very interesting.
Seto, of course, wasn't happy. He was forced to sleep on a bench, and he was now wandering around, looking for a place to get food. Then he had an idea. Seto dug through a few garbage cans until he found a piece of paper and a marker. On it he wrote, "Will work for food and money." After he peeled the food off it to make it look halfway presentable, he sat on the sidewalk and held it up. This is so brandishing to my dignity, he thought gloomily.
Seto probably sat there for hours, but no one offered him a job or shelter of any sort. He eventually dozed off, but a familiar voice awoke him.
"Look, Isis, it's a bum! Can I throw rocks at him?" came the voice.
"NO, Mokuba," said Isis.
"But he's so pathetic looking!" continued Mokuba.
"No, Mokuba," said Isis.
"Please!" begged Mokuba.
"Tell you what. I'll let you throw rocks at Malik. Okay?" offered Isis.
"Okay! But can I give him a dollar?" asked Mokuba.
"Fine. Here," said Isis, giving Mokuba a dollar. Mokuba ran over to Seto, but Seto shielded his eyes.
"Here, mister!" said Mokuba, handing Seto a dollar. Seto took it happily, making a mental note to repay Isis. Mokuba, however, didn't seem to want to leave. Isis had to come over there.
"Mokuba, we have to go. Sorry, sir, he's a bit high-strung," explained Isis. He didn't fool her, though. Seto could wear a dress, make- up, and a wig for all she cared, she'd still know it was him. But for Mokuba's sake, she wouldn't say anything.
"I'll repay you one day," said Seto, making his voice deeper. Oh, great, now I sound like an old man, thought Seto.
"I'm sure you will," said Isis, smiling. And with that, she grabbed Mokuba's hand and walked away from Seto. Seto frowned and sighed. No one had offered him a job. He was presentable; he didn't smell yet. His clothes weren't torn. So what was the problem? Wait, maybe that was the problem. He needed some ugly clothes. Perhaps people thought he was faking being homeless. And for the clothes, there was only one person to turn to...
Seto rang Yugi's doorbell fervently. He needed clothes! That puny idiot better be home, thought Seto, Well at least Yami won't be there. He's too busy spending my money. Finally, Yugi answered the door.
"Kaiba? What a pleasant surp-"
"Skip the introductions. I'm not here for a tea party. This is strictly business," said Seto.
"Okay, then. What do you want?" asked Yugi.
"Can I borrow some of your clothes?" asked Seto quickly.
"Excuse me?"
"I mean the clothes that are too big on you."
"Why don't you come in?" asked Yugi reluctantly. Seto needed to sit down, he had been walking for hours. Why did Yugi have to live so far away? Seto entered the house and sat down.
"Well if it ain't Kaiba," said a voice.
"Hello, Chihuahua," said Seto, not even looking up.
"I am not a Chihuahua!" screamed Joey.
"Aren't you late for your rabies vaccinations?" asked Seto.
"Why you-"
"Actually, we're waiting for Yami to arrive. He's coming in a limo! We're going to go for a joy ride through the city. Then he's taking me, and only me, shopping!" said Tea dreamily.
"Reality check, hag. He's probably going to ditch you at the mall," said Seto. Luckily, before Tea had time to reply, Yugi arrived carrying some clothes. Seto grimaced. He couldn't believe that he had to wear that!
"Here Seto, I managed to find something that might fit you. My parents bought this for me, and they hardly know I exist so you can't expect them to know my size."
"Maybe they figured you were the same size as most normal fifteen- year-olds," said Seto, "Never mind. At least now I can pass as a homeless person."
"That's it, Kaiba! Prepare to be hurt very badly!" screamed Tea.
"Yugi scares me more than you do, Tea," said Seto calmly. With that, he got up to leave. But whom should he meet at the door but Yami?
"Having fun, Kaiba?" asked Yami, "I know I am."
"Mark my words, you moron. I will get my revenge!" Seto pushed Yami out of his way and proceeded out the door.
"I hate him! Stupid Pharaoh!" screamed Seto. A few people stopped to stare at him. After all, this was the 21st century. Pharaohs didn't exist anymore, so this person couldn't have known any personally.
"Wait, aren't you Seto Kaiba?" asked a teenage girl.
"No, I'm his twin brother," said Seto.
"You know, I think your brother is so cool! The way he pushed his step father out the window...so cool! But he was a real ditz to lose his money to Yugi Mutou. You know, he's way cuter than you are. Are you sure you're his twin brother? Anyway, I can't believe that Isis Ishtar invited him to a private exhibition that day! I bet they secretly went out or something. Oh, and you know what? I so totally wish I had his autograph! Do you think you could get one for me? Maybe you could get him to meet me in person! That would be so cool! My boyfriend would get really angry though. I don't know if you know him, but his name is Joey Wheeler. Ever heard of him? I don't think you have, he is such a commoner! Wait whatever happened to your brother? Is he living outside? I hope so. Maybe I can invite him to live with me! I could give him Joey's house! Maybe we'll get married and I'll get a BIG wedding with a lot of people! What do you think?" the girl rattled on and on.
"Well, I'd advise you not to hold your breath. Seto Kaiba doesn't go for people like you!" said Seto angrily.
"Oh, I knew it! He's taken, isn't he? By who? I bet it's that Ishtar girl! Is it?" asked the hyper teenager. Seto turned crimson.
"Well, no, he's not taken. But I'll say it again. Why would he go for someone like you? I mean, you fit more words into one minute than anyone I've ever met," said Seto, "I don't think he'd fit one word in."
"Well, I bet he's not as big a jerk as you are! Oh, wait, can I have your autograph?" she asked hopefully.
"No," said Seto. He walked away from her. That was by far the most annoying thing that had happened to him. But what bothered him most was the fact that people already knew about his huge blunder. Yami would really pay for this! Seto entered a restaurant and snuck into the bathroom. There he changed into Yugi's disgusting clothes. Seto looked in the mirror, horrified at his reflection. He was wearing ugly non-designer jeans that were to short to be pants, too long to be shorts. He was also wearing an ugly t-shirt that was too short as well. Oh, great, it looks like I'm wearing a belly shirt. Now people are going to think that I'm gay! He thought. To make himself look better, he pulled on the jacket Yugi had given him. Luckily, that wasn't too short. He sighed and snuck out.
It was getting hot, and Seto sat on a bench in the shade of a tree. He held up his sign again. People passed by, not even paying attention to him. He figured it was his sign that was the problem. He crossed out the word money so the sign read "Will work for food."
He sat there, pathetically holding the sign. He was about to doze off again when something wet landed on his head.
"Oh, crap!" he yelled, tugging at his hair. His suspicions were confirmed. He had bird poop in his hair! Seto ripped off a piece of the pants he was wearing and did his best to clean it out.
As he was cleaning his hair, someone ran out of nowhere and jumped onto him.
"Big brother!" squealed Mokuba, hugging Seto fervently.
"Mokuba, get off me," said Seto. But even though he sounded indifferent, Seto hugged Mokuba back. Isis ran over there.
"Mokuba! I told you not to run across the street! How does Seto control you?" asked Isis.
"I found Seto!" cried Mokuba happily.
"Nice choice of miss-matched clothes, Seto. Oh, and I like the little accessory in your hair," said Isis, smirking.
"Ha ha, very funny. Don't you have a lunatic to be baby-sitting?" asked Seto.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" asked Isis. Mokuba understood the joke, and laughed. Seto, of course, understood the joke, and screamed.
"Shut up! I bet insanity runs in your family, and that's why you're so stupid," Isis looked like a teapot that was boiling for so long it was on the verge of exploding.
"Have fun in the streets, Seto! Because I would rather die before helping you! And I'm sure all the other people you know feel the same way!" she screamed, "Come on, Mokuba. Let's go."
"So I guess this means you're not getting married, huh?" said Mokuba, looking at his feet.
"No, Mokuba," said Isis and Seto in unison. (A/N: They do that a lot, don't they?)
"Oh," said Mokuba, "Bye Seto." Isis was anxious to leave, and she tugged at his hand.
"Let's go Mokuba!" she said unhappily.
"Bye Mokuba," said Seto. Mokuba once again nudged Isis, but Isis chose to ignore it this time. Just as they were about to leave, a limousine pulled over. The back window opened, and Yami looked out.
"Hop in, Isis! I'll give you a lift," said Yami, attempting to be cool. (A/N: I don't get it. I always make Yami seem like a total loser. Oh well. Back to the story.)
Isis took a look at the other people in the car, and saw Joey, Tristan, and none other than Malik! He must be drunk, thought Isis.
"Hey, sissy! What up? I was just hangin' with my buds. Wanna come?" said Malik. His words were barely decipherable, so Isis was sure he was drunk.
Malik turned green in the face and then retched in a CLEAR plastic bag.
"Aw, man, I told you not to mix beer with cognac!" screamed Joey, moving away from Malik. Malik continued retching violently.
"Yugi is such a wimp. That was so much fun! I can't believe he refused to come," said Yami.
"Oh, and when you ditched Tea at the mall, too cool!" said Malik, who had finally stopped retching.
"No, thanks, I have my own car," said Isis, not wanting to hear, or see, anymore of this.
"Come on sissy, chill wid us!" Malik said.
"Number one, get rid of that stupid Brooklyn accent. Number two, don't ever call me sissy again. And number three, I would rather date Kaiba than join you and your moronic friends!" screamed Isis.
"Oh, I knew it! You like that rich-"
"Mokuba is right here, Malik. And we wouldn't want him hearing any bad words," said Isis quickly, "Now, excuse me while I go search for a bit of sanity. Oh, and Malik, why don't you sleep at Yami's new house? There's plenty of room. Or sleep in the streets for all I care. Just don't come home."
"Wait, how do you know that?" asked Malik suspiciously.
"Know what?"
"That Seto's house is big! I knew you've been there! Okay, that's it! I'm going to watch you like a hawk! He's too young for you Isis! You can't be-"
"Malik, shut up!" said Isis, looking around. The last think she needed was for Seto to hear all of this. But to her surprise...and relief, Seto was no where in sight.
"Well, Mokuba, we better get going," said Isis. And with that, she and Mokuba walked away.
"Such morons," Isis muttered under her breath.
To say the least, Seto was disgusted. His money, the money he had devoted most of his life to acquiring, was being spent on- he didn't even want to think about it. What more could go wrong in one day? Well, he was about to find out.
Without even realizing it, Seto had wandered into an alleyway. People began to follow him. Seto, wallowing in his misery, didn't even notice. Until one of them spoke.
"Seto Kaiba!" Seto seemed to wake up.
"What?" he asked, turning around. But he didn't like who he saw...
...it was quite plainly some of Malik's rare hunters. And just because Seto was broke, didn't mean that he wasn't snobby.
"Ah, I see. Your leader goes off and gets drop dead drunk, and leaves you goons to do his dirty work. And I presume you want my rare cards?" he said.
"Yes, we do."
"Well, I'm not sorry to inform you, but I don't have them," said Seto, beginning to walk away from Malik's slaves. On of them swiftly stepped in front of him.
"Kaiba, we could do this the hard way," he said.
"Or, I could drop you where you stand," said Seto, glaring at the Rare Hunter. He was definitely not to be trifled with today. Actually, any day when he was living outside.
Someone tried to land a blow on Seto's head from behind, but he was well prepared and ducked. He spotted a standard kitchen knife on the ground lying in a pile of garbage, and he quickly picked up. Seto grabbed the person closest to him, and put the knife near his neck.
"You step away, or your colleague dies," he said. And he was full willing to hurt them all. The Rare Hunters were strongly reminded of their leader, Malik Ishtar.
"Hey, Kaiba!" said a very happy voice. Seto turned around, his hand never leaving the Rare Hunter's neck. But Seto didn't really know what happened next. But his last thought was, "Ow."
As it turned out, drunken Malik Ishtar had arrived at the scene. When he hit Seto over the head with a broken (and heavy) lamp, he didn't really realize what he was doing. It just seemed like it was something he had been wanting to do for a long time. But to a different person...an older person...a few millennia older person...
"Hey peeps!" said Malik. His workers stared at him fearfully.
"What?" he asked stupidly. One of them finally had the courage to speak.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked.
"What? Oh, you mean why I knocked out my future brother-in law? I don't know. It seemed like a good idea.
"Okay," they said. The Rare Hunters decided to leave their insane leader. And that's just what they did.
Tea came running toward Malik.
"Oh, great! Have you seen Yami? I really want to give him a piece of my mind! I cannot believe he ditched me! That arrogant Seto Kaiba was right!" she screamed. Tea was about to say something else, but she spotted Kaiba.
"What happened to him?"
"I hit him," said Malik coolly.
"Whatever. Have you seen Yami, then?" she asked.
"He's back at the car. Why?" asked Malik. Tea felt that Malik needed help, and she should be his friend, blah blah blah blah blah. So she started to drag him toward where he said the car should be.
"Yami! You moron! How dare you ditch me and fulfill Kaiba's prophecy?!" she screamed, pushing Malik in.
"Oh, sorry. I just forgot you were there," Yami lied.
"Oh, okay then!" she said, swooning. Yami thought, Where's a camera when you need one? Wait, what's a camera?
"Isis, where will Seto sleep?!" asked Mokuba worriedly.
"He'll find a place to sleep, don't you worry Mokuba," she said. Mokuba continued to stare out the window.
"But what if he gets hurt? Oh, Isis!" Mokuba began to cry.
"Mokuba, Seto's a pretty good fighter. He'll be fine in the event that he gets attacked," she said. This calmed Mokuba a bit. But how very wrong she was...
JK: That was so corny.
Seto: How dare you knock me out, you hideous excuse for a human being?!
Malik: Hey, I was drunk.
Seto: I'm sure you were.
Malik: Fine don't believe me.
Seto (to JK): I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!
JK: You're going to hate me even more once you find out who you're going to work for...
Seto: No, not-
JK: Yes, him.
Seto: I hate you! I hate you!
JK: Hey, you don't know what the final outcome of the story will be.
Seto: I better not have any bruises on my face.
(JK laughs nervously.)
Seto: Don't tell me that I will have bruises on my face!
JK: Okay, I won't.
Isis: Ha ha! You're going to look even uglier now!
Seto: Shut up, sister of an insane person!
Isis: Was that an insult?
JK: Okay, please review while I keep these "enemies" from killing eachother. Oh, and by the way, I'm sorry if I offended anyone's opinions in this story!