"The Heart's Silhouette"
My eyes are pasted open, starting straight up through the trembling air. The open, gaping, blackness of my dilated pupils seems to let the tangible darkness into every internal organ within me. Crashing down upon the windows above, the torrential heavens try to seize me through the brittle glass with their chafed breath and singeing tears. Oh, the liberation to have an unseen culprit halt my ceaselessly expanding lungs! Oh, the mercy that a warm butcher to this web of pumping arteries would be!
My friend…Alone you lay on my bed. The same bed that induced so many synthetic hopes to my juvenile mind. A gentle gleam passes over your compact frame. These sparks flying above glisten in patterns over your features. Your beautiful belly holds my messenger of freedom. And your perfect lips kiss only for the last time.
I open my mouth and allow you to rest in my throat, pointing you forever towards my fresh Fate. I release all harboring ties and allow my mind to fall into a bitter chasm unending. I see the sky alight one final time through shivering panes above and sweep in decidedly the last of my shares of putrid breath.
I let my eyelids fall. From a straggling somewhere in the back of my vacant mind, a marble rolls down and circles through my consciousness, playing lightly around my strewn and shredded imagination. It weaves an intricate dance up to where I finally grasp it, wishing to hurl it away, this obtuse blockade in the way of my destiny. The memory scrapes at me, screaming that it must not be disregarded. I concede and unwillingly pick at the sludge around its edges. It glows, soothingly, and I allow my mind to come back, only to investigate this foreign thought that has arisen. A very young child is revealed, her face distorted and haunting. Surrounding her is a stinging aura of despair and mourning. Empty eyes reflect nothing but a reflection of my own silhouette. The most diminutive sample of emotion flashes swiftly across her face, portraying a feeling that was too brief to grasp. But the surrounding picture reverberates instantaneously with blinding light. I physically tremble at the pain snapping through my head. I collapse onto my knees, abandoning and forgetting my accomplice. My body tremors in waves of agony. I do not cry. But my soul contracts and curls into a charred flake.
Her memory can never leave me. The undying enigma within her has bitten into me and tugged me away from ever being truly free from myself. She is always there.
And I think maybe it's time I thank her for that…
~*~
Hello, I'm a long-time HA! fan, and although this isn't my first fanfic it's the first one I've posted. Yes, it is very dark…And I'm sure you can derive the meaning of it for yourself, you can interpret it the way you want to (reasons why, etc…). I don't really intend to continue the story unless you all say there's good reason I should. It's meant to be more of a very brief glimpse.
R/R if you'd like, any sort of comment is appreciated. :)
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine, they're Craig Bartlett's. That's why I'm disclaiming them. Doi.
...like a flower in the rain...-§-@
~Rae