Chapter 5 – Secrets and Soup
Disclaimer: I own nothing you have heard of before.
A/N: please forget that Lucius Malfoy was ever in their year! He is older than them! The story has been altered! Sorry! Chapter three will be modified if possible. Please review if you want me to continue!
***
The three boys ran through the deserted corridors to the hospital wing, robes thrown on carelessly, over pyjamas in Peter's case. Sirius reached the door first, and would have burst through straight away, if James hadn't grabbed the back of his robes and given him a warning look. They stood there for a moment, catching their breath, before cautiously opening the heavy wooden door and stepping through.
Remus was lying fast asleep on a hospital bed, his face turned away from them. A shaft of sunlight from the window above fell across his pillow, shining on his hair. It looked like strands of living gold. His arms lay at his sides, heavily bandaged. As they stepped forward they were able to see his face. It was pale and wan, and it struck them how tired he looked, and there were two big plasters on his face.
He looks so tired; Sirius groaned inwardly, he shouldn't be so tired… he collapsed in the chair at Remus' side, an almost comical look of dismay on his face. James stood behind him, his arms folded and his face grim. Peter stood to the side, looking nervous and concerned, and strangely out of place.
*
Remus felt himself being pulled unwillingly upwards towards consciousness, wanting only to sleep, to escape life and its many pains. But something was tugging at his mind, and would not be ignored.
Oh how he hurt. Every muscle ached, every inch of flesh felt bruised. He opened his eyes reluctantly. There was a shadow over his face. This was not normal. He was usually alone when he awoke. Fear gripped at his throat and chest, and he turned his head slowly, dreading what he might see.
Beside his bed sat Sirius, leaning forward with an anxious expression on his face. James loomed behind him, arms folded over his chest, his face serious but his eyes tender. Peter hovered behind them, his little hands fluttering nervously.
The boys saw Remus turn his head towards them, saw his eyes widen in horror, saw him dig his nails into already bruised and battered palms, saw him flinch as if he had been struck, before closing his eyes again unhappily.
"What happened Remus?" James said gravely "Who did this to you?"
"I… I cant tell you." Remus muttered miserably. "I'm sorry. Really sorry." With that he turned his head away from them so that they would not see the tears brimming in his amber eyes.
"Its ok, Remmie." Said Sirius gently, tentatively reaching out a hand to touch Remus' arm, but pulling back when the other boy flinched at his touch. "You can just tell us when you're ready." He continued nervously. Remus turned his face towards his friend, and gave a tiny nod, before squeezing his eyes shut, wanting desperately not to cry. They will find out, whispered a nasty little voice in his head, they will find out and they will hate you.
Sirius watched as the pearly tears leaked out of his friend's tightly shut eyes, misery written all over his pale face. He had a sudden urge to take away all the unhappiness the boy was suffering. He wanted to see smile, he wanted to see him get up and run with laughter on his lips and light in his eyes. Would that ever happen? Would he ever be able to fight Remus Lupin's demons for him?
"Can we get you something Remus?" he asked softly, "Breakfast maybe?"
" Do you think I could have some soup or something?" he managed, his voice husky.
"Sure," said James smiling, "We'll bring some up right away. Come on." He tapped Sirius' shoulder and swung around, pushing Peter before him. Sirius got up, with a last glance at Remus, whose eyes were now closed, and left the room, a tiny frown on his face. When he was gone, Remus let a sigh escape him. They hadn't questioned him. They hadn't pressured him. They hadn't demanded anything.
"You can just tell us when you're ready." He groaned at the memory. No Sirius, he thought. You're wrong. I can't ever tell you. You would only hate me.
*
The table in the Great Hall was already loaded with food for the early risers, and a few of the people who had remained for Christmas sat there, talking amongst themselves. No one paid much attention to the three boys as they piled food onto plates, although Dumbledore watched them, the corners of his lips twitching in a pleased smile.
James found some tomato soup, close to where the boys usually sat. He grinned to himself. It was funny how everything turned up in the right place at Hogwarts. He filled up a bowl and buttered some toast, and loaded it all onto a tray, and made for the other two. He felt rather surprised when Sirius took it out of his hands, and shoved his own tray in its place. He turned, motioning for James to follow him, grinning slightly but offering no explanation. Peter trotted after them, his tray loaded with sausages, bacon, eggs and some pastries at the side. He enjoyed his food.
Remus had fallen asleep again in their absence, but as soon as they entered the room he awoke, and smiled up at them tentatively, amber eyes still anxious.
"Here's your soup, Remus," Sirius grinned proudly, "still hot!" He waited while his friend struggled to sit up a little against his pillows before placing the tray carefully on his lap. The boy just smiled, and slowly began to drink the soup. The others took the hint, and tucked into their own breakfast happily, chatting between mouthfuls.
They stayed there for most of the day, just talking and playing wizard chess or exploding snap, happy in each other's company. Lily dropped by with Amy, but they didn't stay long. They were shocked at Remus' condition, but refrained from saying anything, although he couldn't help but feel self-conscious, and hope that they wouldn't spread it around when everyone came back after the holidays.
Madam Pomphrey had given him a potion to build up his strength, and by the following day he was walking, most of the bandages gone, but still feeling a little sore. His friends still made no demands for information, although James looked thoughtful at times, and Sirius could be caught suspiciously eyeing the students (and teachers) at the table at mealtimes.
Before they knew it, the Christmas holidays were over, and the other pupils were returning. In some ways it was nice to have everyone back, but it took a while to get used to not having the castle to themselves. They played countless pranks in welcome of their friends and enemies, and everything returned to normal. Severus Snape was as unpleasant and arrogant as the previous term, and the rivalry still rages, although Remus wondered what made the Slytherin look so miserable when he thought no one could see him.
*
It was not long before the snow was melting on the trees, and the ice on the lake was cracking and disappearing. Soon winter passed into spring, and as flowers were born anew, it was Remus' birthday, in February. It still surprised him that people other than his parents gave him gifts, but his friends brushed off his thanks.
The full moon came and went as usual, and if they noticed his condition once a month, the boys said nothing of it to Remus, and as the year wore on they got ever closer, and spent every minute they could together. Sirius and Remus in particular were now inseparable; where you found one, you found the other.
They soon began revising for their end of term tests, spurred on by Remus, who wanted desperately to pass with flying colours, to prove himself worthy of his place at the school. Peter was panicking, convinced he would fail in everything, and it took all the help and support the bigger boys could give for him to pass, but pass he did, and so did the others. Remus got the distinction he had craved, with James and Sirius not far behind.
Before they knew it, it was their last week in the castle, and everyone was talking about what they would do that summer. James invited the other three to visit him, and the dates were duly arranged. Due to the full moon Remus would have to cut short his stay by a few days, but he claimed it was on account of relatives visiting.
When they clambered off the Hogwarts express together, and Remus saw his parents standing on the platform waiting for him, he suddenly felt very reluctant to leave this world that he had mysteriously become a part of. But it was only few months, and he would see his friends at least once. As he walked towards his mother and father he grinned.
His friends.