CHAPTER FIVE: Goa'uld's and elevators are a no no! (Part One)
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Meanwhile on Ra's ship......
"Ha ha ha....I am the all evil Ra! I have taken you prisoner and you won't go far!"
Ra looked evil as ever, "Go to the Stargate and then report back to me!"
"Yes my Lord"
"And remember, I want O'Neill ALIVE!"
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"Oh crap!"
"What's that Sir?"
"Ahh, come over here, I think you'll be unpleasantly surprised."
The goa'uld had really, truly run at "neck-breaking". He had broken his neck and it wasn't a pretty sight.
"Oh my god"
"Yup"
"Is it dead?"
"I dunno, don't tell me the slimy snake's still alive somewhere!"
Carter bent over the dead body.
"So much for our forklift" Mumbled O'Neill.
Jack stood next to Sam and bent over with her.
"Are we okay on the "deadness" of this guy?"
"The guy yes........ the goa'uld though........."
Just then, Jack saw something move.
"Ah crap!"
Jack pulled Carter away and they both stood there watching.
"It's alive!"
"Oh yeah!"
The goa'uld slithered out of the body and took it's flight down the corridor and into the elevator.
Jack looked puzzled.
"Um, Sir? Do you have an idea?"
"No actually, I was just wondering...."
"What?"
"How's he going to push the buttons?"
Sam rolled her eyes.
"What?! Think about it! He's 30 cm high for cryin' out loud!"
"Then we can still catch him sir."
"Right! I knew that! Let's go!"
They ran down the corridor, following the icky translucent gook trail that the goa'uld had left behind.
"Hey there he.....ah.....it goes!"
Sam pointed to the elevator, but as she spoke the doors started to close and the goa'uld, beside the fact that it had no face, looked really really evil!"
"Hey! It's getting away!" Jack stood and looked at the elevator and then to Sam and then to the little lights on the elevator that indicate which floor you're on.
"Well that's great. I did say he was getting away."
"Yes Sir but how did he press the buttons? As you said........"
"I know! But that was just TOO logical!!"
"Well Sir, we'd better g.........."
"No! No way! We're not going after that thing!"
"But Sir!"
"NO!
"Why not?"
"Well for starters, I can't stand those slimy, creepy.....snakes and what would we do with it if we caught it?"
"It might help us to find out why everyone in the base is acting so strangely."
"Well, maybe."
"And second of all?"
"I think it would be easier to find that thing if it was inside someone making them go all haywire."
"But Sir, everyone's acting haywire."
"WELL WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE WE DO THEN? WE CAN'T ASK ANYONE FOR HELP SEEING AS THOUGH THEY ARE ALL SCREWED!"
"I suggest we catch it Sir."
"FINE! WE'LL DO IT YOUR WAY MAJOR!"
"Sir?"
"WHAT?"
"Would you please stop yelling?"
"Oh, sorry Carter."
Jack pushed the elevator button and they waited.............
*BING* the doors opened.....
*SCREECH*
"Huh?"
The goa'uld slithered up the wall and out the hole in the top of the elevator.
"Hey wait! You little...."
"Sir."
"Oh soreeey then! I can't help it if I'm a little frustrated because some evil little goopy looking worm is crawling around in my WORKPLACE!"
"Hey, I wonder if this would qualify under worker's comp....."
"CARTER!"
They jumped up and squeezed through the emergency exit.
"Hey, where'd that little maggot go?"
"THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC!!!"
"What the?"
The off-tune noted echoed around the elevator shaft.
"Carter?"
"Wasn't me Sir."
"Well then who......"
"UP LIKE A BIRD I WANNA FLY AWAY!"
Sam and Jack looked up. There, hanging from a long cable, was another maintenance man. He started to flap his arms and laugh loudly at the pair beneath him.
"Hey you two! Look over there! I can see an un-cooked noodle sliding down the wall! Ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
The cable broke and the man fell to his fate below.
"They don't make cables like they used to!"
"Sir the goa'uld!"
"Oh, right. Help me down there will you?"
"How Sir?"
"What do ya mean, how Sir?"
Sam raised her eyebrows.
"What?"
"Explain to me Sir, just how I am supposed to help you down there."
"Oh so I'm supposed to think of a plan then am I?"
"Well Sir, I don't know how you....."
*OFF WORLD-ACTIVATION!!*
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