All My Life
*~* Laela *~*
*~* What'll you do when you get lonely, *~*
And nobody's waiting by your side?
You've been running and hiding much too long,
You know it's just your foolish pride.
Laela, you've got me on my knees.
Laela, I'm begging darlin' please.
Laela, darling won't you ease my worried mind.
I tried to give you consolation,
When your old man let you down.
Like a fool, I fell in love with you,
You turned my whole world upside down.
Laela, you've got me on my knees.
Laela, I'm begging darlin' please.
Laela, darling won't you ease my worried mind.
Let's make the best of this situation,
Before I finally go insane.
Please don't say, we'll never find a way,
And tell me all my loves in vain.
Laela, you've got me on my knees.
Laela, I'm begging darlin' please.
Laela, darling won't you ease my worried mind.
Laela, you've got me on my knees.
Laela, I'm begging darlin' please.
*~* Laela, darling won't you ease my worried mind. *~*
It was about a month later and the band was practicing their very first song in the empty transfiguration classroom, on a lonely Saturday evening.
"Remus, when am I supposed to start playing, after or before James?" Sirius asked his friend for the eighth time.
"I've told you a million times! After me, and before James!" Remus said while throwing his hands up in frustration.
"Got it." Sirius said, as Remus struck a chord, and their song began.
She screams when I'm away, she's been gone before.
I worry all the time, why worry anymore.
Now I go, away.
Now I know, today.
They were entering the first chorus when Dumbledore walked in, looking for James.
"Mr. Potter, can I ask you a favor?" Headmaster Dumbledore asked as he almost tripped over the cords leading to the amp.
"Sure Headmaster, what can I do for you?" James asked, grinning.
"I need you to show around a new student, seeing as though I am wanted at the Ministry, for something or other. I figured since you and the other gentlemen don't seem to be doing anything at the moment that maybe you could…" He explained and James interrupted.
"Ok, Headmaster, that's fine I will show this kid around. Where is he?"
"She," a girl said as she walked in the room, "is right here."
Sirius dropped his drumstick in awe of the creature entering the room. She was tall, with long brown hair and dark purple eyes, and a tan complexion.
"Hello," she said holding out a French-manicured hand, "I'm Laela Banks. And you are…"
"J-James Potter." He said shaking her hand, and gazing into her violet eyes.
"Ok children, I will be going now," Dumbledore said as he walked out of the room.
"My name is Sirius Black." Sirius stated as he stumbled towards her, freed from the entanglement of his drum set.
"And this is?" She said smiling towards Remus.
"Remus Lupin. Very pleased to meet you, Laela." He said, trying very hard to disguise the unpleasant tone in his voice. No one else seemed to notice his struggle.
"Well James, you don't have all day! Run along, and don't you two stay out too late!" Sirius said, his grin getting bigger by the second, as Laela and James walked out the door. He turned to get back to the drums, but was stopped by the look of total and utter disgust in Remus' eyes.
"What's your problem?" He asked his friend.
"I don't like her." Remus answered flatly as Sirius stared at him as if he was out of his mind.
"Are you nuts?" He asked. "Because if you are serious, I am rethinking our whole friendship! She was beautiful! How could you not like her?"
"Looks aren't everything, Sirius." Remus retorted.
"Looks aren't everything, my ass! Everyone says that, but no one knows what it means. Yeah, the 'personality' might be the thing you stick around for, but who is kidding who? You would not go up to some 4 ton, hygiene challenged, front-tooth missing, greasy-haired slob, because the poor girl 'looks like she had a good heart.' Honestly, Remus."
"No Sirius. You don't understand. That girl, Laela, she is going to be the end of us!"
For this comment, Remus received a rather large eye-roll.
"Please Remus, you sound like a fortune cookie."
"Sirius! Listen to me! I know these things, its like, my werewolf 'powers,'"
"Are you kidding me?! Remus, before you make all these accusations, just get to know the incredibly gorgeous girl." Sirius finalized and walked out of the room. Remus just stood, taken-aback, not believing that one of his best friends thought he was crazy.
"Oh well." He said aloud, "he'll find out sooner or later." He said as he set down his guitar and walked towards Sirius' retreating back.
"So, Laela, where are you from?" James asked as he led her into the Great Hall.
"I used to live in California, but my Dad got a job in the Ministry, and we moved here." She said, slipping her arm through his, linking them together.
"That's cool." He said as they walked on, and talked about nothing in particular. As they were walking, Lily ran through the doors to the Great Hall, and her gaze fell upon them. Her eyebrows rose, and she smiled and raced towards them.
"Hello James," she said smiling.
"Hey Lils, this is Laela Banks, she just moved here from the US." He said, as Laela released her grip on James and shook Lily's hand.
"Laela. This is my girlfriend, Lily Evans." Laela's stare narrowed as the words escaped James' lips.
"Oh, a girlfriend." She said coolly and looked straight at Lily, "Quite a catch you got here, Lily." She winked at Lily, making Lily question this new person.
"Yes," she answered, "I know." She leaned towards James and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you tonight, James."
As Lily was almost out of the hall, she heard Laela's giggle, and her face burned with hatred.
"So where did you find that one? Toys R Us?" Laela asked, smiling at James.
"What do you mean?" He asked, not quite clear on what Toys R Us was.
"I just mean that she's a little, rough. You know, a little immature and prude."
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"Just that I bet that's about as far as you've gone with her, a kiss on the cheek."
"No." James said, thinking about the statement. How far had Lily and him gone?
"Oh, surprise, surprise. Is Miss Evan's a slut? A wolf in sheep's clothing?"
"No, not at all!" He said, getting frustrated.
"So what have you done with her, James?" Laela asked, eyebrow raised.
"We've, uh, we've,"
"Oh my God. You've only kissed her, haven't you." She stated, laughing.
"Well, yeah."
"How long have you been going out with her for?"
"Almost a year." James was getting a little depressed now, as his voice went up an octave. Why hadn't him and Lily gone further?
"Ha!" She laughed, and walked off, towards the Hogwarts grounds.
"Nice to meet you, James 'never-gonna-get-any' Potter. I will see you soon." She blew him a kiss and disappeared.
"Oh, I'm gonna get some tonight," he mumbled, hands thrust into his pockets, walking back to the common room.
"I hate her!" Lily screamed as she emerged through the door to the third year girl's dorm. She had gotten lost in anger, and was just making it back to her room.
"I'm sorry, I know it! I ate your last Chocolate Frog! But I was so hungry, and," Ava confessed, but was interrupted by Lily.
"Ava!" Lily screamed. "Not you! Laela! I hate her! She is trying to steal James away from me, I know it!" She flopped onto her bed as Ava ran over to her.
"Lily, why does it matter? James is crazy about you!" Ava said, and as an answer, a knock was heard from the door. Lily got up and answered it.
"James!" She said, hugging him tightly, as if someone was trying to pull him away from her.
"Hey Lil, wanna go on a walk with me?" He asked, smiling at her.
"Yeah!" she said as she winked at Ava and was led out of the door by James.
"Where are we going?" Lily asked, after 5 minutes of trekking through the castle.
"Right here."
"The astronomy tower, James?" Lily asked, smiling. He nodded and gestured for her to come sit down next to him. She did, and they started kissing. After awhile, he started to unbutton her pants.
"James." She stopped kissing and looked into his eyes. "No." He looked at her and then smiled and started kissing her again. A little while later, his hand was traveling up her shirt, but she grabbed it before he got anywhere.
"James!"
"Lily!" He laughed and tried to put his hand further up her shirt.
"James!" She screamed while moving away. "I'm serious, stop it!"
"God, Lily." He said getting up. "You're so prude, maybe you should grow up." He walked out of the astronomy tower as Lily just stared at the closing door.
"Oh my God?" She asked herself, "What just happened?"
"James? What is the matter with you?" Lily yelled, running after him.
"The matter with me?" He screamed, an octave higher than usual. (A/N: Maybe James is going thru 'the change' lol.) "What is the matter with you?"
"What are you on about, James."
"Lily, we have been going out forever, and all we have ever done is kissed!"
"James, we're only 14! We shouldn't be doing anything more than that! And you've always been fine with just kissing before! What's up with you? Why are you acting like this?" Lily asked, not yelling any more, just searching for an answer in his eyes.
"Yeah Lily, we're 14. We're not 60! We are young, and should be doing more than holding hands and talking about the weather!" He took a step closer to her and grabbed her hand. "I just, I just want more."
"More? What does more mean? More of being together and stuff like that, or more sex?" She said while taking her hand out of his.
"No! That's not what I mean, I mean,"
"Why are you all of a sudden acting like this? Answer me, James."
"Well, me and Laela were,"
"Laela!" Lily screeched. "I hate that girl! I don't want her hanging out with you!"
"Lily, there is nothing that you have to worry about with her."
"Whatever James."
"Do you not trust me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.
She flinched, and failed to come up with an answer.
"How can you not trust me?" He yelled. "I don't like this jealous part of you Lily.
"And I don't like this horny part of you, James!" She retaliated.
"What!?"
"Maybe we should just," her voice trailed off.
"Maybe we should just, what?" He asked. "Break-up? Is that what you were gonna say?"
"Well, I just," she started, but was cut off.
"Fine! We are broken up. We are no longer dating, Lily." James said, himself almost not believing the words flying out of his mouth.
"No, James, I just meant that," She started, tears forming in her eyes.
James was walking away at this point, but turned back towards her, "Just remember Lily. You said it first. Not me."
"James!"
"Goodbye Lily." He said as he walked out of sight.
The thunder and lightning was terrible that night. It was as if God knew that Lily and James need each other, but they had let their own pride get in the way. This was one of the many times that God regretted giving humans freewill. At least, that was what Sirius thought.
"What can we do to get them back together?" He asked at the first of many LJBT (Lily & James Back Together) meeting.
"I don't know that there is anything we can do. I think that James might have to get this out of his system. Because Lily won't have sex with him, but someone else will." Elle said, taking a sip of butter beer.
"So long as that person isn't Laela." Remus said, crunching on some pretzels.
"Pshaw. If James were so lucky!" Sirius scoffed.
"No, Remus is right, that would absolutely kill Lily. She might do something crazy, like try to get back at him somehow." Ava said, agreeing with Remus.
"How?" Sirius asked, sucking on a sugar quill.
"Like, go and mess around with someone James hates." Remus said.
"Like, Snape?" Ava asked.
"No, she hates him too. Like, Amos Diggory." Elle said, cringing at the thought.
"Fuck James, I'd kill her if she did that. Diggory. What a prick." Sirius said, grabbing his fifth sugar quill.
"Seriously guys, I don't think we have any control over this." Elle said, and the rest of the group finally agreed.
"Yeah I guess your right." Sirius finally caved.
"Well, off to bed then. I guess we'll do damage control in the morning." Ava said, yawning and heading up to the dorm.
"I think we miss-judged Lily!" Ava said as she tore in the common room, three weeks after that night. It was still bad weather, raining hard all the time, letting up slighty when dawn hit, but other than that, just terrible. Over the past three weeks, the group was surprised at what had occurred. It was as if James and Lily had switched places. Lily was alive and happy. No one saw her cry at all, except for that night that they broke-up. Whereas James was moody and distant from the rest, sad about the person he had lost.
James was getting better though, him and Laela had been together a lot, driving Lily insane.
"What do you mean, 'we miss-judged Lily'?" Sirius asked, as he yelled checkmate. Remus slammed his fist down, knocking over all the chess pieces, which really pissed them off.
"Come with us!" Elle said quietly as she ran out the portrait hole, and Remus and Sirius ran after them.
They ended up by a closet in a forgotten 3rd floor corridor. The noises within brought a smile to Sirius' face. The group hid in a closet across from the noisy one, and settled in.
"Is that James and Laela?" Sirius grinned as him and Remus gave each other high-fives. "Atta-boy Jim!"
"Guess again." Ava said unhappily. Just as she said it, two things happened simultaneously.
First, James started walking down the hall, probably looking for the gang.
Then, Lily and Amos fell out of the closet at James' feet. They both shot-up, Lily adjusting her bra and her shirt, and Amos buttoning his pants.
"Oh, uh, hello James." Lily said, smiling awkwardly.
"Hello, Lily." He said, smiling, raising one eyebrow. "Amos." He said, nodding towards the Hufflepuff quidditch captain.
"J-James." Amos said nodding, as James walked past them.
"Oh and Amos?" James said, as the other two spun around.
"Yeah?"
"Your fly is undone," he said shaking his head, and then mumbled to himself while turning around, "you great prat."
Lily heard this though, and let out a sound that was remarkably like the air leaking out of a tire. "Come on Amos," she said, tugging on his arm, while he struggled to zip his zipper.
Once everyone had gone, the rest of the friends emerged from the closet, confused.
"Why didn't James freak out?" Elle wondered aloud.
"Why was Lily in that closet with a stupid git like Amos is what I want to know!" Sirius said, furious at the prospect of Lily and Amos.
"I'm worried." Ava said, wringing her hands together.
"Why?" They all asked in unison.
"Because, tonight is going to be the hardest night yet. Perhaps, ever."
"Why d'you say that?" Remus asked.
"Look outside." Ava answered, as the rest of the friends turned towards the window facing the lake. The weather, was indeed, more terrible than it had ever been. The wind was whistling, and it was pouring like no other. The lightning was keeping the sky illuminated for more than 5 minutes at a time. The thunder was rumbling so bad that it looked as if there was an earthquake, making the lake slosh all about. In a way, it was absolutely beautiful. But in another way, it was the most terrifying experience of any of their lives.
Later that night, Lily was wandering back to the Gryffindor tower from the owlery, after sending a letter to her parents. It was almost Christmas holidays, and she wanted them to know that she was staying at Hogwarts again this year. As she was nearing the tower, she saw James and Laela walking away from her, holding hands, and every once in a while, stopping to kiss. This made Lily sick. What made her sick even more was the fact that she let him go. And now, she realizes that she might have been in love with him. She had already told the girls this, when they finally did ask why her and James hadn't gone any further.
This brought tears to her eyes. Why had she screwed things up so bad? Why couldn't she have realized sooner that she needed him? But he obviously didn't need her. He didn't even blink when Amos and her stumbled out of the closet. She didn't even like Amos, he was just, there. No emotional attachment, just a physical thing. But isn't it funny, she thought, that lack of physical activity was what broke them up in the first place? It's weird, because she isn't a very 'moral' person. Yes, she thought, being nice and polite is all well said and done, but having sex was never a big deal to her. Why wouldn't she do it with James? It was as if something told her not too. Too late now though.
She went and sat in the common room, staring at the fire, as she drifted off to sleep. She awoke hours later, not to the sun streaming in through the window onto her four-poster bed, but to the sounds of angry voices.
"I can't believe you James! You know you still have feelings for Lily!" Sirius whispered rather loudly in the common room.
"So!"
"Then why did you do it?"
Do what? Lily thought to herself, straining to hear the rest of the conversation.
"I don't know Sirius, maybe because I am a teenage guy? It's not like you haven't done it before!"
"Yeah, but I don't have the perfect girl for me right under my nose!"
"Sirius, Lily is with Amos! You saw them in the closet today!"
"Yeah, but she didn't have sex with Amos!" Sirius said exasperated.
"Like she will even care, Sirius. She is the one who wanted to break-up with me. She is the one who has been walking around here, all happy. Not me."
"So having sex with Laela and a 12 other girls is gonna help how?"
"Sirius, why are you being like this? You and Ava did it! You and God only knows who else have done it?! And you don't even know what you're talking about. Why are you on my case?"
"Because James, you can do better."
"No, Sirius, I can't. Maybe I could have, but Lily will never take me back now! I've totally ignored her, and just went off with Laela. But every second I had with Lily meant more to me than my whole life combined. And now, there's nothing I can do to get it back. I like her so much Sirius, and I've messed everything up."
"You need to tell her what you just told me." Sirius said to his friend, feeling very sorry for him.
"Don't you see Sirius? I can't."
"You already did." Lily said standing up, scaring Sirius to death.
"Holy shit!" He jumped, bumping into a chair and falling to the ground. "God, that hurt like a Mo-Fo."
"A mo-fo, Sirius?" James said, forgetting the conversation that they were just having, "I haven't said that since I was like, 8."
"I've never said that." Lily said, getting up and starting to walk away, as Sirius mumbled something that sound like, "oh shut up."
"Lily," James said unsure of what to do.
"James, why did you do that?" She asked, walking towards him.
"Do what?"
"Why would you go and do that with all those girls? I mean, don't I mean anything to you?" She asked him honestly, tears forming in her eyes.
"Lily, don't you get it? You mean everything to me! But I just, needed to get it out of my system, I guess."
"Get it out of your system?! No, you want to fly and take a spin around the quidditch pitch. That is getting something out of your system. Not having sex with 13 girls in three weeks!"
"I may have exaggerated that number…" Sirius said, immediately regretting speaking up at all, because of Lily's death glare.
"Look whose talking!" James said, looking down at Lily. "I heard Diggory talking about you all the time! How do you think that felt, hmm Lily? Him talking about how you and him did it every night, and shit like that? Why are you up in here lecturing me, if you are a guilty party too?"
"That was with one person James, and we barely did anything anyway."
"Ok, Lily, whatever you say."
"James!"
"Lily, its just what Diggory told me, ok? It's probably what drove me to the edge in the first place.
"What are you talking about?"
"The only reason I did anything with anyone, was because Diggory started saying all this shit. Like how you were amazing in bed, and how he'd never seen a red head scream quite like that." James shuddered at the thought. "The only reason I did anything with anyone, was because you did."
"Oh my God that asshole! I never did anything more than 2nd base with him! Why would he say that?" Lily was freaking out now, and Sirius had fallen asleep in a chair near them.
"Are you serious Lily? You never had sex with Amos?" James asked looking into her frantic eyes.
"No! I swear! I didn't like him like that! I only like you like that! Oh God! That is sick! I feel disgusting now that everyone thinks that." She said, looking at James. She then started laughing, hysterically.
"Lily? Are you ok?" He asked worriedly, bending down to her level.
"Why-would-you-believe-that???? Diggory?" She said between laughs, as his face broke into a smile.
"Well I didn't know, I mean, I don't know," he said, trying to figure out the right words.
"What are we gonna do James?" She asked, straitening up, and calming back down.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean with us? I still like you a lot, I just don't know what to do anymore." Lily said honestly looking up at him.
"Well Lil, I don't know either," he paused, smiled, and put his arm around her, "I guess only time will tell." He gave her a quick squeeze and stated that he was going to bed, because this was a tough subject, and he needed his full awakeness to comprehend everything that was going on
"Only time." She said quietly, blinking back tears, her gaze following his retreating back.
"Night Lil," James said, blowing her a kiss. She caught it and replied.
"Night James." She said, and then whispered, "I love you."
As she was walking up her own stairs, Sirius' eyes shot open.
"Lily loves James?" He asked him self, a panicked look sweeping across his face. "Oh great."
I absolutely hate this chapter. I am seriously considering giving up this story. I think that I might tie up 5th year and then give up on it. Grrrrrrrrrr. Well tell me if you have any suggestions, because I might rewrite this chapter, with Laela liking Sirius, and him falling for her, and her screwing up the whole group of friends. I dunno. Ok I will talk to you all later.
FYI~ (5-15-03) Laela was really the only one James messed around with. I am not at liberty to discuss what they did at the moment, because it will ruin what is gonna happen later on… But we will find out a little more about laela in the next chapter, shes not quite who we think she is (or maybe exactly who, I don't know how intelligent you all are…) She is important to the story though, for reasons that will become clear later. Um, Lily and James will not get back together for a while, because I kind of want to concentrate on other people in the story, (like Sirius, and Voldemort.) Sorry, but they will get back together, eventually.
Also, another thing to explain. They did go to Dumbledore with the video, and the ministry is working their little wizard butts off, trying to figure out what the hell he Voldemort was doing. Lily is off the Imperius curse and is normal, except for being a tad annoying. (you can tell she is not my favorite character. I'm rather partial to Remus and Sirius, personally. I like giving them the good lines.) Ok, hope I cleared some of this up.
PS!!!!!!! The song in the beginning is Layla, by Eric Clapton. And the song the boys play, is Your Star, by The All-American Rejects. AWESOME BAND, I LOVE THEM!
I don't own anything.
LIZ~