Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story (more's the pity--they could help pay my student loans) except for Eve Berger. Nor did I come up with the plot of PoA, and the scenes and dialogue included in that fab book, which I humbly reproduce at certain points herein. All that belongs to J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., Bloomsbury, Raincoast, Scholastic...the list goes on!
A/N: Ooh, tension. :-) No real notes for this chapter, just enjoy!
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Chapter 8: Some Helpful Advice
As Eve stormed out of the Potions classroom, Snape walked into it, momentarily watching her slam the door behind her before registering the wide-eyed expressions all staring at him from the desks.
Class is dismissed--clean your cauldrons and get out! Snape barked, and the class scurried to comply and escape his wrath.
As soon as everyone had cleared out, Snape stormed out of the classroom himself, locking the door behind him. Paying little attention to those in his way, he brushed past cowering students as he stormed up to Dumbledore's office. To say he was angry would have been a gross understatement. He was beyond anger, beyond rage. He never--never--could have believed that a student would have the gall to be so...so insolent to him of all people! And to have it be an upstart, no-talent, know-it-all, Gryffindor...!
Dumbledore looked only a little surprised to see Snape stalk in after a perfunctory knock.
Is something wrong, Severus? Dumbledore said mildly.
I demand that you expel--or at the very least suspend--Eve Berger at once!
Dumbledore's eyebrows twitched upwards, annoying Snape to no end. The man hardly looked curious as to what he had to say!
And why would that be?
Because she shows absolutely no respect for authority! Snape launched into a somewhat biassed retelling of what had happened moments before. He paced as he spoke, eyes blazing, gesturing violently with his hands.
So? What do you plan to do about it? Snape said, stopping in his pacing and placing his hands on the back of one of the winged chairs in front of Dumbledore's desk.
Dumbledore held up one finger as a gesture for Snape to wait a moment. Walking over to his fireplace, Dumbledore removed some powder from a carved box on the mantle and threw it into the flames.
he said to the fire, and within a moment McGonagall's head appeared in the flames.
Yes, Headmaster?
Would you please go and fetch Miss Berger to my office? I believe she is in her room at the moment.
McGonagall looked puzzled by this request, but nodded and disappeared.
Dumbledore walked back to his desk and sat down before answering Snape's question.
Well first I plan to try and convince her not to leave, at least until the Christmas holidays. I then plan to try and find a way to make her want to stay beyond that time.
Snape's jaw dropped, stunned for once. He actually spluttered, But--what about--
Let's put all concerns about personality aside, shall we? Can you imagine what might happen if she goes back out into the Muggle world? At this stage in her education, she will lose what little control over her powers she has, and every time she became upset or angry she would be a danger to herself and others. I believe you mentioned that at the meeting last summer?
Snape gritted his teeth, not sure if he was angrier at Dumbledore for taking her side in this or for throwing his own words back in his face.
Futhermore, there are others in this world who would be more than willing to instruct her in return for her allegiance. Now while I don't believe that she would do that, if she leaves this school with her heart hardened against us, that scenario becomes a more likely possibility. And if she was approached with that offer and she refused... He let the conclusion dangle in the air between them. When Dumbledore spoke again, his tone was light, casual, but there was steel in those blue eyes. Remember yourself at that age, Severus?
Certainly Snape remembered. Bitter, angry at his parents, his teachers, at the whole world, feeling that he was an outsider, that his talents were going to waste...
And look where it led you... a small voice said in his head. That was no doubt the point Dumbledore was trying to make.
But what do you plan to do about her blatant disrespect--
None of her other teachers have reported any apparent personality problems. By their reports, she seems rather quiet and studious. I plan to ask you to give her some respect, Severus. I have never quarrelled with your teaching methods, and still do not plan to. I merely wish to point out that she is not a typical student, and that you may have to try a slightly different tactic with her. She will respect you if you at least outwardly seem to have a little respect for her. I'm not asking you to favour her or go easy on her by any means. But she is an adult, and more sensible than some her age. You only have to treat her like one.
There was a sharp knock on the door and Dumbledore called for McGonagall and Eve to come in. Eve was obviously still furious, her face hard as stone, back ramrod straight. Dumbledore gestured to the other chair and she sat stiffly, not even glancing at Snape.
You may go, Professor McGonagall, I will discuss matters with you later. McGonagall gave a quick nod and left. Now, Miss Berger, Professor Snape has informed me of your discussion earlier, including your expression of an intention to leave Hogwarts. Might I ask why?
Because I am tired of being treated like a child and having my lack of magical knowledge thrown in my face.
Have your other teachers done this as well?
Occasionally, but only in hints or glances. Professor Snape is the only one who was ever obvious about it, or-- She bit her lip.
She paused as though considering her words, though she didn't break eye contact with Dumbledore.
Or who seemed to take some enjoyment in doing so.
Snape was about to protest but Dumbledore held up a hand to stop him.
What if I asked you to delay your departure until Christmas holidays, on the assurance that your concerns will be dealt with?
Her eyes flickered upward as she weighed the offer. After a moment she looked back at Dumbledore, that same determination in her face.
In that case I'll wait until then to make a final decision.
Dumbledore said, nodding seriously. "Please wait in the hall for a few minutes; I would like to talk with you privately as soon as Professor Snape and I have finished.
Thank you, sir, she said, and quietly left the room. She hadn't looked at Snape for even a second the entire time.
Aren't you going to say anything to her? She-- Snape said as soon as the door had closed.
I will deal with her in a moment, Severus, Dumbledore interjected, At the moment I am more concerned with you. I notice that you have still not scheduled any extra tutoring time with her.
I haven't seen her do well enough to deserve advancement beyond her class, Snape replied stiffly.
Then she would probably benefit from some extra help. I believe you both have Friday afternoons off? Dumbledore's tone indicated that that hadn't been a question, and that the interview was over. Snape rose to leave.
Dumbledore called as Snape was about to open the door, At least make an attempt to be somewhat civil with Miss Berger. You will regret it if you are the one who drives her away. Dumbledore stared at him with one of his intense, meaningful stares, then turned back to the papers on his desk.
Snape wrenched the door open, glancing over at where Eve was staring at the wall opposite, before turning and storming down the hall, spitting on the floor. He hated it when Dumbledore seemed to know more than he was willing to tell.
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Eve knocked on the office door as Snape stormed away, and entered at Dumbledore's call of Come in!
Dumbledore stood as she walked in again, smiling kindly as he stepped out from behind his desk. I think we would be more comfortable in my parlour. Please, follow me.
Eve followed as Dumbledore led her into a small sitting-room. Like Dumbledore's office, it was cluttered, this time with floor-to-ceiling bookshelves, a chaise, numerous small tables and two fat, winged armchairs set in front of a roaring fire.
Please, make yourself comfortable, Dumbledore said, and Eve sat in one of the armchairs. Still very angry and defensive, she tried to sit straight-backed in the chair, but its softness wouldn't let her, so she finally gave up and leaned back slightly.
Dumbledore seated himself in the other chair, resting his elbows on its arms in a relaxed manner.
Would you like to tell me about what happened this morning? he asked, calmly and kindly.
Eve wasn't exactly sure how much to say. Somehow she doubted that, as Headmaster, he'd take very kindly to any criticism of his teachers. However, he hadn't made any mention of punishment when he'd called her in his office in front of Snape, and she sincerely doubted that Snape had told Dumbledore the bare-bones truth of what had been said. Keeping her eyes on the fire, Eve went through the morning, mentioning the annoyances she'd had before Potions class, as well as everything that she and Snape said as best she could recall it, and with only a little embellishment and partiality.
When she finished explaining how McGonagall had fetched her in the middle of packing, Dumbledore remained silent for a minute, making Eve more nervous than she already was. Finally, in a quiet, calm voice, he asked, Why do you think that Professor Snape's comment about your former education was the one that made you lash out?
Eve looked up at him momentarily, but could see nothing but pensiveness in those blue eyes. She swallowed, looking back at the fire. Did she really want to tell him what she'd been thinking for all those weeks? Pour out everything to him? But then, what option did she have? If she wanted him to sympathize, to help things, she had to tell him. Besides, she felt she could trust him, though she wasn't entirely sure why. Maybe because he hadn't just expelled her as soon as Snape had told him about their argument, because he'd actually asked for her side of the story and then really listened to what she had to say.
Probably because what he said is the same thing I've been saying to myself, she said, in a soft voice. Dumbledore didn't say anything, and she assumed it was a hint to continue. Ever since I got here...I've seen that this magic ability of mine means that my future will have changed permanently. I mean, I can't really go back to working in a museum like I used to. This ability means that I have to do something with it...like having any other great ability that could help people. You can't just have a gift like this handed to you and not use it. But this means that, well...everything I've done, everything I've worked for...all my work in secondary school and university...it doesn't have any use, now. All the plans I've made, everything I've been working towards has completely disappeared. My university diploma, something I've been rather proud of, something I worked hard for, has absolutely no value in this world; it's just a piece of paper. All that work I did to get my degree means nothing to anyone here, because it's something completely useless and foreign to this world. Not only that, I don't know anything about the world I'm now in. I know even less than someone half my age with magic parents! And I certainly don't need to have that pointed out to me.
Eve glanced over at Dumbledore and saw him nodding thoughtfully. Lightly stroking his beard, he said, You mentioned some of the other teachers occasionally treating you...unfairly as well?
Well...sometimes some of the other teachers talk down to me, like I don't know anything, not just about magic. But at the same time they sometimes seem to expect me to do better than some of my classmates because I'm older, which really just emphasizes the point that I don't know anything about magic.
Dumbledore paused when she'd finished, staring into the fire before saying, softly, Eve, I'd like you to consider two things, one for each of your problems. The first is that you should take a moment to see things from your teachers' point of view. They're used to teaching children and teenagers, they have developed ways of teaching those age groups which have become second-nature to them. Having an adult in a first-year class can't be easy for them--they're trying to teach the class as they usually do, but then they have one student in the class who is a little too mature for those tactics. They're trying to teach both ways, which isn't easy. I think you should look at the way your teachers treat you during your tutoring sessions. Do they still treat you like a child when you are working together one-on-one?
Eve thought about it. Actually, when she was working alone with her teachers, the relationship between the two of them was more like those when she'd discussed class work with her university professors--slightly more equal. She hadn't really paid attention to the difference between her classes and tutorials before.
The second thing I want you think about is this: you have learned so much more in your life than just what you studied in school. You were raised to adulthood as a Muggle, and because of that, you have some understanding of how Muggles think, why they do what they do and believe what they believe. That is, unfortunately, not a common ability among wizards. Most never bother to wonder why people act as they do, and many believe that Muggle psychology is not worth knowing. To them, it would be the same as a Muggle wondering how dogs think. But what very few of them realize is that the same things that drive Muggles to act as they do are the same for wizards. Magi and Muggles differ only in their ability to do magic, both are members of Homo Sapiens. Homo Sapiens-Magi can be just as greedy, selfish, prejudiced and mean as some Muggles are, and Muggles can be just as kind, generous, courageous and wise as some witches and wizards. Because of that similarity, magical history has parallels to Muggle history, and the two are often interconnected. You have been doing some reading about recent magical history, I know, surely you can see parallels between Lord Voldemort's reign and events in Muggle history and literature?
Eve wasn't sure if she was more surprised at Dumbledore's knowledge of what she'd been reading, or about his using You-Know-Who's real name. It was the first time she'd ever heard someone actually say it aloud. Most of the students, and even the teachers, seemed too frightened of him to dare say the name.
Now, before I send you back to class, was there anything else--anything not connected with this incident--that you wanted to discuss?
Eve paused. Her instincts said , but there was something that had been troubling her off and on for weeks. Ever since the Sorting, really. But would she just sound neurotic if she actually said it? It wouldn't hurt, really, just to mention it. She gulped. Well, there was one other thing.
Dumbledore's face was neutral, hard to make out.
Well...it's just I'm not really sure that...I really...belong in Gryffindor. I mean, the Sorting Hat said it found courage in me, but I really doubt I'm the brave type. I mean, I'm not sure I'd ever have the courage to anything really brave, like jump into a raging river or something. I don't know, I've always considered myself the more brainy or loyal type, really.
Dumbledore smiled kindly, and Eve got the feeling he'd heard these same doubts before.
There are all kinds of bravery, Miss Berger, he said softly. There was a slight pause before he added, smiling slightly, "You did just argue with one of the more...formidable teachers at this school."
"That sounds more like stupidity to me," Eve said, responding with a small smile of her own.
That too. Now," Dumbledore switched to a more businesslike tone, "I believe your class is in the library due to the inclement weather; I'll write you an excuse slip. Dumbledore conjured up a quill and piece of parchment, and scribbled on it briefly before handing it to her. Also, I'd like to talk with you every couple weeks, just to see how you're getting along. Would every other Thursday, first period suit you? Good. If there is anything greatly troubling you, please come and see me as soon as you can. I will always make time for a student. Don't let things get out of hand again, before coming to see me about them. He fixed her with a sharp stare, and Eve felt a small rush of guilt. And Professor Snape mentioned giving you some tutoring time on Friday afternoons. I would also suggest that if you have a problem you want to discuss with him, that you do it at that time, not in front of your classmates. I'll see you two weeks from tomorrow, then.
Eve made her exit, and hurried down to the library, clutching the note tightly in her hand. As she ran, she had to think that Dumbledore certainly had a way of telling you you'd done something wrong without saying those exact words. She wasn't sure whether she liked his way better or not.