"NOT ME"
He could still remember how it happened, as clearly as if it was happening now. The picture was as crisp and fresh as an early autumn morning. Everything was so vivid to him, he could see it all playing over and over and over in his head.
And he wanted it to stop.
It was roughly ten years later, and this pain, anger, even…hate, was still fresh on his mind. He couldn't get it out. He had tried everything, meditating, relaxing, working, speaking with the Jedi Council, and even seeing a Jedi mind healer. Yet none of it had helped. His feelings were yet unchanged.
And he blamed it all on the Council. It was all their fault! It they hadn't sent Qui-Gon and himself to negotiate with the Trade Federation ten years previous, none of this would have happened…
"Master!" He cried in a whisper as he pulled Qui-Gon Jinn's head into his lap.
Qui-Gon's eyes fluttered open, and met Obi-Wan's. "It's too late, my young Padawan." He told the boy hoarsely.
"NO!" Obi-Wan yelled in defiance.
"Obi-Wan, promise me you will train the boy." Qui-Gon managed to say through the pain that was overtaking his body.
A flicker of anger washed through Obi-Wan's body, though he knew not why. "Yes, Master." He promised without thinking.
"He is the Chosen One, Obi-Wan. He will bring balance to the Force. Train him well."
Those were his last words, before his body fell limp, and all life drained out of him. Not 'Goodbye.' Not 'I will always be with you, my young Padawan Learner.' Not even, 'may the Force be with you.' They had been on that boy. The Chosen One. The one who would bring balance to the Force.
"I HATE HIM!" Obi-Wan roared, breaking his meditation.
Luckily, he was alone. His Padwan was at his classes, and he was in his room. No one heard him. And it was better that they didn't. Jedi weren't allowed to hate, and Obi-Wan would never admit this emotion to anyone.
When his Master had lay, dying, in his arms, after he had defeated the Sith Lord that had run Qui-Gon through, all the elder could talk about was that boy. After all of the years they had had together. After all of the things he and Qui-Gon had gone through, it was a nine year old boy who evaded his last thoughts. And it wasn't fair!
Did he despise the boy because of it? Oh yes. He hated Anakin Skywalker with the deepest desperation he possessed.
Obi-Wan began to cry. Slowly at first, then the tears began to stream heavily from his eyes. He fell to his knees, and they rushed down his face, rolling off his cheeks, hitting the ground.
"Oh Master." He sobbed. "Why not me?"
He could still remember how it happened, as clearly as if it was happening now. The picture was as crisp and fresh as an early autumn morning. Everything was so vivid to him, he could see it all playing over and over and over in his head.
And he wanted it to stop.
It was roughly ten years later, and this pain, anger, even…hate, was still fresh on his mind. He couldn't get it out. He had tried everything, meditating, relaxing, working, speaking with the Jedi Council, and even seeing a Jedi mind healer. Yet none of it had helped. His feelings were yet unchanged.
And he blamed it all on the Council. It was all their fault! It they hadn't sent Qui-Gon and himself to negotiate with the Trade Federation ten years previous, none of this would have happened…
"Master!" He cried in a whisper as he pulled Qui-Gon Jinn's head into his lap.
Qui-Gon's eyes fluttered open, and met Obi-Wan's. "It's too late, my young Padawan." He told the boy hoarsely.
"NO!" Obi-Wan yelled in defiance.
"Obi-Wan, promise me you will train the boy." Qui-Gon managed to say through the pain that was overtaking his body.
A flicker of anger washed through Obi-Wan's body, though he knew not why. "Yes, Master." He promised without thinking.
"He is the Chosen One, Obi-Wan. He will bring balance to the Force. Train him well."
Those were his last words, before his body fell limp, and all life drained out of him. Not 'Goodbye.' Not 'I will always be with you, my young Padawan Learner.' Not even, 'may the Force be with you.' They had been on that boy. The Chosen One. The one who would bring balance to the Force.
"I HATE HIM!" Obi-Wan roared, breaking his meditation.
Luckily, he was alone. His Padwan was at his classes, and he was in his room. No one heard him. And it was better that they didn't. Jedi weren't allowed to hate, and Obi-Wan would never admit this emotion to anyone.
When his Master had lay, dying, in his arms, after he had defeated the Sith Lord that had run Qui-Gon through, all the elder could talk about was that boy. After all of the years they had had together. After all of the things he and Qui-Gon had gone through, it was a nine year old boy who evaded his last thoughts. And it wasn't fair!
Did he despise the boy because of it? Oh yes. He hated Anakin Skywalker with the deepest desperation he possessed.
Obi-Wan began to cry. Slowly at first, then the tears began to stream heavily from his eyes. He fell to his knees, and they rushed down his face, rolling off his cheeks, hitting the ground.
"Oh Master." He sobbed. "Why not me?"