I won't bug you with a ridiculously long A/N, this is going to be a short part anyway!

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Part Twelve

Late Saturday night. The party, after calming down for a bit, had started up once more sometime during the late afternoon. But I wasn't there to witness it. I was somewhere else.

I was hanging out in the Degrassi Community School's boiler room. I was just sitting with my knife, my backpack, and my jacket all wrapped around my boney frame.

Hell, I felt right at home. ~ Yep, just me, the rats, and the boiler. ~ I had spent the night here countless times before, why not again?

I had needed to escape from the noise. Social situations, like that loud party, gave me nasty headaches. In the Boiler Room, with the exception of the pulsating boiler, I had near silence.

Yep, just me. All alone in the dark appliance room. Sitting, doing nothing-.

~ Ok, now it's too fucking quite. La la la la la... Doesn't help. Kind of wish I had someone to talk to. ~

I giggled at the sheer stupidity of it all.

~ All aboard for the Pity Train! Whoot Whoot! Your conductor would like to thank you for being so downright disheartened. Next stop: Rejectville! ~ A joke I had with myself. I just kept riding the rails of the Suicide Express and guess what? The train was about to crash at the last station.

"Very funny, Ams. This is the part where you start talking to yourself now..." But nothing came out of my mouth. "Ha; I don't even have anything to say to myself! Classic!" Too bad I didn't have the actual determination to get on a real train and get my ass out of Degrassi.

It was something I had put off doing for a long time. I was supposed to run away. ~ What was it, two years ago..?. ~ I'd get out of the hellhole called Degrassi. ~ I'll go somewhere else, where no one knows me – yeah, that's what I'll do. I'll make a new life... But away from Craig? Naw, I can't. ~

"Absolutely pathetic." I really was. Putting myself on the line for a guy. "But Craig... he is my soul mate." I contemplated this. "Yeah, he is. And tomorrow, I'm gonna go fucking tell him."

I wasn't going to run away; I was gonna fucking stay. Stay for Craig. "I'll go over to his house and tell him." ~ Fuck yeah. Screw Emma and the rest of 'em. It's fucking time that I did something 'bout my... infatuation. ~

It was decided. On the morrow, I would go over to Craig's house and confess my eternal love to him. And then, he would realize his true feelings for me, and we would live happily forever away from Degrassi and its inane citizens.

But for now, in the Janitor's closet, I would have to get some sleep.