Chapter eight: My eagle eye keeps an eye on things whilst life goes on at
Hogwarts.
"Ah headmaster, Sir, I wonder if I could have a moment of your precious time?" I asked Dumbledore about a week after the incident with Harry's arm. I was careful to always speak very respectfully to Dumbledore- the last thing I needed was him thinking he was a better wizard than me like young Harry.
"Certainly Gilderoy, what seems to be the problem?" Dumbledore asked me. As always I was struck by his twinkling eyes, and another thought occurred to me.
"You know with an eye color like yours I wonder- have you ever thought about wearing robes to match them, or bring out the color in them? I do, and as you can see," I swished my robes grandly. "They come up pretty well if I do say so yourself."
To my surprise Dumbledore looked more amused than anything else. "Thank you for the advice Gilderoy, I shall consider taking it on board." He said softly. "Now, was there anything else?"
"Actually there was headmaster. I have been thinking that it might be prudent to perhaps teach the students to duel. I remember learning it here and as well as being fun it was a useful skill to have. I could have gone on to make a career from it, but decided to dedicate myself to the dark arts. Anyway, in the present uh.circumstances here I think not only would it be handy for the students to know how to defend themselves, but also a welcome distraction." I recited, remembering how the night before Flitwick had said something similar giving me the idea to Snape and the divination professor, Trewlaney.
Dumbledore nodded slowly. "I think you're right on both counts there- very well Gilderoy, you have my permission to start a duelling club."
*****
Later that afternoon I admired my handiwork. A large picture of myself winked out at me from the poster which declared that "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin third class, honorary member of the Dark Force Defence League, five times winner of Witch Weeklies most charming smile of the year award, is prepared to teach Hogwarts students his great duelling skills." I smiled at my picture which smiled back at me- one of my better ones too.
"What have you got there Gilderoy?" Asked Snape as he peered over my shoulder.
A strange noise escaped him as he looked at the poster. "Duelling club?" He finally said. "Interesting idea.. wherever did you get it from?"
"It just popped into my head." I replied. "What do you think?"
"I think perhaps the poster is a bit much to be honest." Snape said dropping down into the seat opposite me.
"It is?" I asked dismayed. "Was it the gold stars everywhere?"
"I was thinking more along the lines of the wording." Snape replied slowly. "I think perhaps the students would get more of a surprise if they saw you turn up if they didn't know you'd be there."
"I don't follow." I said confused.
"It's well known news Flitwick's a champion dueller so it will no doubt be assumed he will be teaching the class." Snape explained. "So this way- you can make an entrance."
"An entrance." I repeated smiling. "Brilliant plan Severus."
"In fact Gilderoy, I'll even offer to be your duelling partner in a demonstration to the students." Snape added.
I hesitated, wondering whether he was any good at duelling? I didn't want to be hurt. But then it occurred to me that this might be a very good way of keeping an eye on him further. In the last week since the Quidditch match he hadn't done anything particularly suspicious, but I was keeping a good eye on him. "Ah.alright..yes, yes thank you." I said making up my mind that he couldn't be much good at it, he didn't look like he moved fast enough.
*****
I peered through the doors leading into the room, and to my surprise the room was packed. "Rather good turnout." I told Snape, who was with me. "I suppose they heard a rumor I was going to be here after all?"
Snape simply grunted. I fixed my robes, making sure they were perfect as they were one of my favorite plum ones. "Shall we?" I asked.
Snape grunted again, and I took it for a yes, and strode onto the platform, Snape right behind me. I waved my arm to get the attention of the chattering students. "Gather round, gather round. Can everyone see me? Can you all hear me? Excellent." I said as the crowd moved forward to see me. I was glad I had chosen to wear the plumb robes. "Now, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little duelling club, to train you up in case you ever need to defend yourselves like I myself have done on countless occasions- for full details see my published works. Let me introduce my assistant Professor Snape. He tells me he knows a tiny little bit about duelling himself and has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration before we begin. Now I don't want any of you youngsters to worry- you'll still have your potions master when I'm through with him, never fear!"
I turned to face Snape and we both stood in the accepted duelling stance. I bowed to him, with much flourish, since I hardly considered this a challenge- more like a picnic. Snape, however, just nodded abruptly- he was probably beginning to realise what he could have gotten himself into. We both raised our wands in front of us, and I explained to the students how this was also accepted, and how on the count of three we would cast our first spells, which were, of course to disarm only, nothing more. I didn't want to scare the students by doing something terrible to Snape in front of them!
"ONE-TWO-THREE!"
Before I could bring my wand up and cast Snape had his up and yelled "Expelliarmus" and I felt myself being lifted up, and flying back into the wall. I landed with a thud. The first thing to go through my mind was: Is he trying to kill me? Does he know I know he's up to something, that he might be the one behind the chamber of secrets?
I took a deep breath, determined not to let the students see my fear, what if it incited Snape and he went crazy and opened the chamber right then and there. I put my hat back on and smiled at the students as cheerily as I could manage. "Well there you have it. That was a disarming charm- as you see I've lost my wand- ah, thank you Miss Brown. Yes, an excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don't mind my saying so, it was very obvious what you were about to do. If I had wanted to stop you it would have been only too easy. However I felt it would be instructive to let them see.." Snape's lip curled at that and I decided to quickly change the subject- we didn't want carnage in here with the chamber of secrets. "Enough demonstrating! I'm going to come amongst you now and put you all into pairs. Professor Snape, if you'd like to help me.."
We moved through the crowd putting them into pairs. Before I reached Harry and Ron Snape was there. "Time to split up the dream team, I think." I heard him say and he paired Harry with Malfoy, who was looking delighted with the idea. I shrugged, not really caring who was partnering who, although I had a slight idea that it would be nice to have Harry lose, if he won he'd probably think he was better than me and start behaving like a prima donna again! I moved back onto the platform where everyone could see me and called "Face your partners and bow!" They obeyed. "Wands at the ready. When I count to three, cast your charms to disarm your opponent-only to disarm them- we don't want any accidents.ONE, TWO, THREE!"
To my shock there was complete disarray in the room. A Hufflepuff was tap dancing, a Ravenclaw was turning purple, a Slytherin was snorting like a pig, and a Gryffindor was crying buckets. "I said disarm only!" I shouted, but there was no response from the crowd. My eyes wandered to Harry, out of curiosity. His legs were clearly out of his control as he danced around. "STOP! STOP!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
"Finite Incantum!" Snape yelled, and all of a sudden order was restored. I took a deep breath wondering why I hadn't thought of that.
"Dear, dear." I muttered as I walked along the room. I hesitated, in the middle of the room wondering what do to now. "I think I'd better teach you how to block unfriendly spells. Let's have a volunteer pair- Longbottom and Finch-Fletchley, how about you?"
Snape hurried over. "Bad idea, Professor Lockhart. Longbottom causes devastation with the simplest of spells. We'll be sending what's left of Finch-Fletchley up to the hospital wing in a matchbox. How about Malfoy and Potter?"
"Excellent idea!" I cried, deciding it wouldn't hurt Harry to be humiliated one more time. Whilst I was aware of the fact that he hadn't been acting too badly lately, I still wanted him to know who was second best.
Harry and Malfoy came into the middle of the ground. "Now, Harry, when Draco points his wand at you, you do this." I raised my wand and did a contemplated jig which would have looked very impressive if my hand wasn't sweaty. I dropped the wand. "Whoops- my wand is a little over-excited."
I noticed Snape whispering something to Malfoy, and Harry must have noticed it too as he asked me to repeat the move. "Just do what I did, Harry." I told him.
"What, drop my wand?" Harry asked, but I pretended not to be listening. I wasn't going to justify that with a response.
"THREE-TWO-ONE-GO!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.
Malfoy was the first to raise his wand, and he shouted "Serpentsortia" and a long black snake shot out of his wand towards Harry, who looked shocked as the snake moved towards him. I shot a glance at Snape, had he told Malfoy to do this? And what did it mean- was he trying to assert himself as the one who opened the chamber of secret? Before I could think about it anymore Snape said "Don't move Potter. I'll get rid of it."
I hurried to the fore. "Allow me." I brandished my wand at the snake, and there was a loud bang, but the snake didn't disappear. Instead it flew up into the air and then back onto the ground, and it wasn't too happy with what had happened. I glanced at my wand wondering what was wrong with it- I hadn't done the wrong spell. The angry snake was slithering towards Justin Finch-Fletchley and it raised itself ready to bite. Before I could do anything Harry was there, and he hissed something at the snake, in a strange tone of voice. The snake stopped, and curled up on the floor ready to go to sleep. I was trying to work out what Harry had been hissing at the snake for as Justin yelled at Harry. "What do you think you're playing at?" and hurried out of the room.
Snape stepped forward and got rid of the snake, and then Ron was rushing Harry out of the room. Voices were calling excitedly, some however, where not so sure what was going on:
"He's a parselmouth." Someone said.
"So?" Another one asked.
"Slytherin was famous for being one." The first person explained.
I felt my jaw drop- were they suggesting that Harry was the one who had opened the chamber of secrets? Was I looking at the wrong person?
"Under the circumstances I think this will be enough for today, if that's okay with Professor Lockhart?" Snape called. I nodded. And the students filed out of the room.
Snape was looking thoughtful. "Who'd have thought?" He muttered.
"Thought what?" I asked.
"You heard Potter- he's a parselmouth." Snape replied as we began to walk out of the room. "Next thing you know everyone is going to be going round saying Potter opened the chamber. That he's the heir of Slytherin."
"Maybe he is.." I said slowly, wondering how Snape would react to that. But my trick didn't work.
"Maybe so." Snape replied as we parted in the corridor.
I walked towards my office thoughtfully. This was a new turn of events- now I wasn't sure who to suspect. It looked as though I was going to have to keep my eyes open from now on, make sure nobody got hurt.
"Ah headmaster, Sir, I wonder if I could have a moment of your precious time?" I asked Dumbledore about a week after the incident with Harry's arm. I was careful to always speak very respectfully to Dumbledore- the last thing I needed was him thinking he was a better wizard than me like young Harry.
"Certainly Gilderoy, what seems to be the problem?" Dumbledore asked me. As always I was struck by his twinkling eyes, and another thought occurred to me.
"You know with an eye color like yours I wonder- have you ever thought about wearing robes to match them, or bring out the color in them? I do, and as you can see," I swished my robes grandly. "They come up pretty well if I do say so yourself."
To my surprise Dumbledore looked more amused than anything else. "Thank you for the advice Gilderoy, I shall consider taking it on board." He said softly. "Now, was there anything else?"
"Actually there was headmaster. I have been thinking that it might be prudent to perhaps teach the students to duel. I remember learning it here and as well as being fun it was a useful skill to have. I could have gone on to make a career from it, but decided to dedicate myself to the dark arts. Anyway, in the present uh.circumstances here I think not only would it be handy for the students to know how to defend themselves, but also a welcome distraction." I recited, remembering how the night before Flitwick had said something similar giving me the idea to Snape and the divination professor, Trewlaney.
Dumbledore nodded slowly. "I think you're right on both counts there- very well Gilderoy, you have my permission to start a duelling club."
*****
Later that afternoon I admired my handiwork. A large picture of myself winked out at me from the poster which declared that "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin third class, honorary member of the Dark Force Defence League, five times winner of Witch Weeklies most charming smile of the year award, is prepared to teach Hogwarts students his great duelling skills." I smiled at my picture which smiled back at me- one of my better ones too.
"What have you got there Gilderoy?" Asked Snape as he peered over my shoulder.
A strange noise escaped him as he looked at the poster. "Duelling club?" He finally said. "Interesting idea.. wherever did you get it from?"
"It just popped into my head." I replied. "What do you think?"
"I think perhaps the poster is a bit much to be honest." Snape said dropping down into the seat opposite me.
"It is?" I asked dismayed. "Was it the gold stars everywhere?"
"I was thinking more along the lines of the wording." Snape replied slowly. "I think perhaps the students would get more of a surprise if they saw you turn up if they didn't know you'd be there."
"I don't follow." I said confused.
"It's well known news Flitwick's a champion dueller so it will no doubt be assumed he will be teaching the class." Snape explained. "So this way- you can make an entrance."
"An entrance." I repeated smiling. "Brilliant plan Severus."
"In fact Gilderoy, I'll even offer to be your duelling partner in a demonstration to the students." Snape added.
I hesitated, wondering whether he was any good at duelling? I didn't want to be hurt. But then it occurred to me that this might be a very good way of keeping an eye on him further. In the last week since the Quidditch match he hadn't done anything particularly suspicious, but I was keeping a good eye on him. "Ah.alright..yes, yes thank you." I said making up my mind that he couldn't be much good at it, he didn't look like he moved fast enough.
*****
I peered through the doors leading into the room, and to my surprise the room was packed. "Rather good turnout." I told Snape, who was with me. "I suppose they heard a rumor I was going to be here after all?"
Snape simply grunted. I fixed my robes, making sure they were perfect as they were one of my favorite plum ones. "Shall we?" I asked.
Snape grunted again, and I took it for a yes, and strode onto the platform, Snape right behind me. I waved my arm to get the attention of the chattering students. "Gather round, gather round. Can everyone see me? Can you all hear me? Excellent." I said as the crowd moved forward to see me. I was glad I had chosen to wear the plumb robes. "Now, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little duelling club, to train you up in case you ever need to defend yourselves like I myself have done on countless occasions- for full details see my published works. Let me introduce my assistant Professor Snape. He tells me he knows a tiny little bit about duelling himself and has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration before we begin. Now I don't want any of you youngsters to worry- you'll still have your potions master when I'm through with him, never fear!"
I turned to face Snape and we both stood in the accepted duelling stance. I bowed to him, with much flourish, since I hardly considered this a challenge- more like a picnic. Snape, however, just nodded abruptly- he was probably beginning to realise what he could have gotten himself into. We both raised our wands in front of us, and I explained to the students how this was also accepted, and how on the count of three we would cast our first spells, which were, of course to disarm only, nothing more. I didn't want to scare the students by doing something terrible to Snape in front of them!
"ONE-TWO-THREE!"
Before I could bring my wand up and cast Snape had his up and yelled "Expelliarmus" and I felt myself being lifted up, and flying back into the wall. I landed with a thud. The first thing to go through my mind was: Is he trying to kill me? Does he know I know he's up to something, that he might be the one behind the chamber of secrets?
I took a deep breath, determined not to let the students see my fear, what if it incited Snape and he went crazy and opened the chamber right then and there. I put my hat back on and smiled at the students as cheerily as I could manage. "Well there you have it. That was a disarming charm- as you see I've lost my wand- ah, thank you Miss Brown. Yes, an excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don't mind my saying so, it was very obvious what you were about to do. If I had wanted to stop you it would have been only too easy. However I felt it would be instructive to let them see.." Snape's lip curled at that and I decided to quickly change the subject- we didn't want carnage in here with the chamber of secrets. "Enough demonstrating! I'm going to come amongst you now and put you all into pairs. Professor Snape, if you'd like to help me.."
We moved through the crowd putting them into pairs. Before I reached Harry and Ron Snape was there. "Time to split up the dream team, I think." I heard him say and he paired Harry with Malfoy, who was looking delighted with the idea. I shrugged, not really caring who was partnering who, although I had a slight idea that it would be nice to have Harry lose, if he won he'd probably think he was better than me and start behaving like a prima donna again! I moved back onto the platform where everyone could see me and called "Face your partners and bow!" They obeyed. "Wands at the ready. When I count to three, cast your charms to disarm your opponent-only to disarm them- we don't want any accidents.ONE, TWO, THREE!"
To my shock there was complete disarray in the room. A Hufflepuff was tap dancing, a Ravenclaw was turning purple, a Slytherin was snorting like a pig, and a Gryffindor was crying buckets. "I said disarm only!" I shouted, but there was no response from the crowd. My eyes wandered to Harry, out of curiosity. His legs were clearly out of his control as he danced around. "STOP! STOP!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
"Finite Incantum!" Snape yelled, and all of a sudden order was restored. I took a deep breath wondering why I hadn't thought of that.
"Dear, dear." I muttered as I walked along the room. I hesitated, in the middle of the room wondering what do to now. "I think I'd better teach you how to block unfriendly spells. Let's have a volunteer pair- Longbottom and Finch-Fletchley, how about you?"
Snape hurried over. "Bad idea, Professor Lockhart. Longbottom causes devastation with the simplest of spells. We'll be sending what's left of Finch-Fletchley up to the hospital wing in a matchbox. How about Malfoy and Potter?"
"Excellent idea!" I cried, deciding it wouldn't hurt Harry to be humiliated one more time. Whilst I was aware of the fact that he hadn't been acting too badly lately, I still wanted him to know who was second best.
Harry and Malfoy came into the middle of the ground. "Now, Harry, when Draco points his wand at you, you do this." I raised my wand and did a contemplated jig which would have looked very impressive if my hand wasn't sweaty. I dropped the wand. "Whoops- my wand is a little over-excited."
I noticed Snape whispering something to Malfoy, and Harry must have noticed it too as he asked me to repeat the move. "Just do what I did, Harry." I told him.
"What, drop my wand?" Harry asked, but I pretended not to be listening. I wasn't going to justify that with a response.
"THREE-TWO-ONE-GO!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.
Malfoy was the first to raise his wand, and he shouted "Serpentsortia" and a long black snake shot out of his wand towards Harry, who looked shocked as the snake moved towards him. I shot a glance at Snape, had he told Malfoy to do this? And what did it mean- was he trying to assert himself as the one who opened the chamber of secret? Before I could think about it anymore Snape said "Don't move Potter. I'll get rid of it."
I hurried to the fore. "Allow me." I brandished my wand at the snake, and there was a loud bang, but the snake didn't disappear. Instead it flew up into the air and then back onto the ground, and it wasn't too happy with what had happened. I glanced at my wand wondering what was wrong with it- I hadn't done the wrong spell. The angry snake was slithering towards Justin Finch-Fletchley and it raised itself ready to bite. Before I could do anything Harry was there, and he hissed something at the snake, in a strange tone of voice. The snake stopped, and curled up on the floor ready to go to sleep. I was trying to work out what Harry had been hissing at the snake for as Justin yelled at Harry. "What do you think you're playing at?" and hurried out of the room.
Snape stepped forward and got rid of the snake, and then Ron was rushing Harry out of the room. Voices were calling excitedly, some however, where not so sure what was going on:
"He's a parselmouth." Someone said.
"So?" Another one asked.
"Slytherin was famous for being one." The first person explained.
I felt my jaw drop- were they suggesting that Harry was the one who had opened the chamber of secrets? Was I looking at the wrong person?
"Under the circumstances I think this will be enough for today, if that's okay with Professor Lockhart?" Snape called. I nodded. And the students filed out of the room.
Snape was looking thoughtful. "Who'd have thought?" He muttered.
"Thought what?" I asked.
"You heard Potter- he's a parselmouth." Snape replied as we began to walk out of the room. "Next thing you know everyone is going to be going round saying Potter opened the chamber. That he's the heir of Slytherin."
"Maybe he is.." I said slowly, wondering how Snape would react to that. But my trick didn't work.
"Maybe so." Snape replied as we parted in the corridor.
I walked towards my office thoughtfully. This was a new turn of events- now I wasn't sure who to suspect. It looked as though I was going to have to keep my eyes open from now on, make sure nobody got hurt.