Hello! Got an extra day off, so you get an update a few hours early. Kinda makes me sad though, if I update faster, I get to the end faster... If I had stuck to my original "post every 3 days" plan, this story would be ending about a week before the movie was to open. You figure it out.
Anyone that's reading this before the movie, and thinks this won't/wouldn't happen, you are probably right. To anyone thinking that AND reading this after the movie, you are definitely right. But this is what I would like to see happen... Not the whole "Miranda's got a problem" thing, but the L/G G/L moments...
To those who have found this story recently, or those who pointed it out to others, THANK YOU! I got as many hits in 24 hours for the last part, as I did in 72 hours for the previous. WOW.
I stated waayyyyy back at the beginning I was going to keep posting, no matter what type of response I got, and that's true, but I really do appreciate everyone who's taken the time to review and/or email me. I've responded to every email, and every review with an email attached, even those who have reviewed multiple times.
Yeah, the title of the last part was easy to figure the source, so's this... I can't fit all the songs I want in this story. Maybe in a sequel? Some that I thought of using, they don't quite work unless they are already in a relationship, or experience a breakup. There is a song in this chapter that I bet most of you have never heard, but I swear it's a real song, and I knew I had to use it, because of the fourth line, but couldn't figure out where. Hope it works here.
Of course, when I use "obscure" songs here, it lessens the impact of the words, but some I just couldn't leave out. There are hundreds of songs that could fit into this story, but while most of you like the songs, others probably think there are too many, and you are both right.
I seriously considered cutting the last chapter when Lizzie fell asleep, and some of you probably think I should have. But it was at such an emotional peak, I thought maybe it would be best to change the mood a little before the end. I could still change it, but I think I'll leave it that way. This is just a continuation of the last chapter, starts right after it. There is another part here where I could cut it, but decided against it, for the same reason I didn't cut the last.
Gordo IS very brave to give her the CD. I almost did the same thing to someone, but, it was a cassette, and, I chickened out. Of course, it WAS full of cheesy wannabe pop like "I wanna Be Your Boyfriend" by "The Party". Yuk!
I'm glad you guys think I write well. All positive reviews for the last two chapters. I went back and tried to fix typos in the other chapters, spelling errors, paragraph breaks, missing words, blah, blah, blah. If anyone finds some I didn't fix, in ANY chapter, please email me and let me know.
I know my story isn't 100% original, but not all of it has been done before. There are only so many ways to say certain things, and with close to 1,000 LM stories here at fanfiction.net now, there are bound to be similarities here and there. If you think I stole something from someone, I didn't mean to, this story was written a month ago, remember that. Of course, if anyone wants to use what I've done in a story, go for it. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, just don't go overboard, and take it all, k?
Someone commented on their story it seemed weird to use a song sung by a female for Gordo, or a song done by a male for Lizzie. I was thinking the same when I started adding songs, but then I realized it really doesn't matter. The meaning of the song is the important thing. Your interpertation of these songs may differ from mine, but it's my story, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah.
Am I talking too much? "Yeah, why don't you kiss her, instead of talking her to death?" Sorry, had to sneak in a line from one of my favorite movies, It's a Wonderful Life. I bet some of you are thinking the same about my story, why doesn't he just kiss her? Well, I'll say it's a 99.9% possibility to come up soon, but I ain't one to gossip, so you ain't heard that from me!
Disclaimer- I own nada. Have nothing to do with Disney, Ren-Mar Studios, etc. All song titles, lyrics, etc, are property of the respective artists, labels, writers, agents, etc, and ASCAP/BMI.
On to Chapter 15. Yes, finally.
Chapter 15
"Lizzie? Are you awake? Can I come in?"
It was her mother. Should she pretend to be asleep, or not? No, she could use her mother at a time like this. "Yes, Mom," she called out, but not too loud, as not to wake her brother or father.
Jo had gone to bed, then returned, wondering if, since Matt had been awake, maybe Lizzie was as well. If she wasn't before, all the noise Matt had caused surely woke her up. She carefully opened Lizzie's door. The pizza pocket sat on Lizzie's desk, cold, forgotten. She had taken maybe two sips of the juice, then left it as well. Lizzie's trash basket was full of tissues. Lizzie's face was red and puffy, and was streaked with dried tears. "Poor baby!" she thought. "But, she's no longer a baby, she's becoming a beautiful young woman."
Lizzie looked up at her mother, not knowing what to say. She removed the headphones, and sniffed several times, but she was out of tissues.
"Oh, honey! Just a minute, I'll be right back." She went down the hall, emptied Lizzie's garbage, grabbed more tissues, and wet a washcloth. She passed by the coffee spill. It was beginning to seep through the newspaper. She dropped some of the tissues on the mess. Probably it wouldn't help, but couldn't hurt.
She returned to Lizzie's room, and softly shut the door 99% of the way. Her daughter hadn't moved. She handed her the tissues, and started to wipe her face with the washcloth. Lizzie stopped her, and took away the washcloth, putting it off to the side, as if she wanted to let the tears stay there awhile. Neither knew quite what to say.
Lizzie blew her nose, then wiped at her eyes. "Mom, do you think Gordo likes me, or loves me?"
What a question. What kind of answer did that warrant? They were both just fourteen, but did true love have an age requirement? She tried to give her the best answer she could, but it was just speculation on her part, she couldn't answer for Gordo any more than she could for Lizzie.
"Well Lizzie, I know there are many types of love, and I know he loves you as a friend. But, as for the kind of love I THINK you are referring to, it's very possible, but honestly, I don't think he truly would love you like that, unless you loved him back." She paused, and posed a loaded question to her daughter. "Do you?"
"I don't know, Mom. It's just, it's just..." She couldn't finish the sentence. She was glad her mother had brought her fresh tissues, she needed some...
"Those must have been SOME songs, huh?"
All Lizzie could do was nod.
"Can I see what songs he picked?" Jo knew more about computers than her family gave her credit for. She waited for a response. Lizzie had started to eat the petrified pizza. She paused, and moved to the bed, so her mother could sit down in front of the computer.
Jo McGuire quickly scanned over the list of songs Lizzie had already opened. Of course, she didn't know all of them just by title, but the few she didn't know, just by reading the names she knew they were something special. She avoided re-entering the folders, they seemed a little too personal. She unplugged the headphones, set the volume, and scanned over the huge amount of unsorted music. She clicked one at random.
When you're feeling lost in the night,
When you feel your world just ain't right
Call on me, I will be waiting
Count on me, I will be there
Anytime the times get too tough,
Anytime your best ain't enough
I'll be the one to make it better,
I'll be there to protect you,
See you through,
I'll be there and there is nothing I won't do.
I will cross the ocean for you
I will go and bring you the moon
I will be your hero your strength
Anything you need
I will be the sun in your sky
I will light your way for all time
Promise you,
For you I will.
I will shield your heart from the rain
I will let no harm come your way
Oh these arms will be your shelter
No these arms won't let you down
She turned, and looked at Lizzie. She had started to cry heavily again. She didn't want her to choke on the pizza, so she cut off the tune mid-song, and just read the titles instead. Wow, Gordo had done his homework.
"Do You Believe In Us" by Jon Secada, "Can't Let Go" by Mariah Carey, "I Only Have Eyes For You" by the Flamingos, "Cupid" by Sam Cooke, "Just One Look" by Doris Troy, "Too Late To Turn Back Now" by Cornelius Brothers and Sister Rose, "I Swear" by John Michael Montgomery.
Wow, wow. New songs, old songs, rock, r & b, country, soft, hard, it was all here. There were even a few hip-hop songs she didn't recognize. How incredibly romantic. Lizzie asked her a question, but she didn't hear. She turned. "What was that, honey?"
"Did you ever hear of a song called "Short People", Mom?" asked Lizzie innocently.
Wow, why was she asking about that? That wasn't in the list of songs that Lizzie had opened. "Uh, yeah, it's by Randy Newman, you know, the guy who did the music in Toy Story. Why do you ask?"
"Well, I found it there, in a folder, and it was marked as something he was supposed to delete, but he didn't. So, I didn't think it was for me, and I didn't play it. What's it about?" Lizzie had a feeling, but she'd better ask.
"Well, Lizzie, Mr. Newman said it was supposed to be a joke, but it made some people really mad. Something about short people being ugly, and having no rights to live, basically."
Lizzie stared at her mother, not believing. "No! Why would anyone write such a cruel song? And why would Gordo listen to that nonsense?"
"Well, like I said, he claimed it was a joke, but, I don't know the whole story. It did make #2 on the charts though." She paused before answering the second part of Lizzie's question. "Why would Gordo listen to it? I hope he doesn't think what I think he thinks, but it's hard on him, he's about your height, and look at the other boys in your class. A couple of them are six feet already. It doesn't change who he is on the inside, but he's probably very sensitive about not being at least several inches taller than you. At least, I hope that's all it is."
Lizzie was already in shock, or else that would have hit her much, much harder. When he tried to get Parker to attend the dance with him, he'd tried to make himself appear to have more stature, but she thought he had gotten over it. By giving her this CD, it was almost as if Gordo had given Lizzie a long, hard look into his soul, if that was at all possible. She turned to her mother.
"After checking the CD out, even just a little, NOW do you think Gordo loves me?"
"Yes, I do, but it's still ultimately up to you whether you accept that love or not. It's in your hands."
"But, Mom! We ARE just fourteen, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, what if, what if, we don't last together in the future? Next year, five years from now, or even twenty, thirty years away?"
"I don't know, dear. I can't decide these things for you, but I promise to always be there, for Gordo, and for you. Or, if it happens, whoever else you invite into you life. I love you, and whatever you do I'll support you, as long as you are satisifed with where life takes you." With that, she turned back to the computer, and began to scan the song titles once again. She gasped. "Oh, Lizzie! Make that a definite yes. Gordo loves you, I'm sure of it. If he put this song here, he's serious."
"What? What?" Lizzie wanted to know NOW what song her mother was referring to...
"It's the same song your father played for me when we were dating. In a way, it says the same thing that other song just did, but I'll let you listen, and decide." She clicked the track, and softly sang along with the simple tune. Lizzie had heard it many times, but now, there was actual meaning behind those words. Words meant for her.
You and I must make a pact
We must bring salvation back
Where there is love
I'll be there I'll be there
I'll reach out my hand to you
I'll have faith in all you do
Just call my name
And I'll be there, I'll be there
And, ohhhhh
I'll be there to comfort you
Build my world of dreams around you
I'm so glad that I found you
I'll be there with a love that's strong
I'll be your strength; I'll keep holdin' on
Holdin' on, holdin' on, holdin' on
Yes I will, yes I will
Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter
Togetherness, girl it's all I'm after
Whenever you need me
I'll be there I'll be there
I'll be there to protect you
Yeah baby
With a non-selfish love that respects you
Just call my name
And I'll be there, I'll be there
And ohhhhh...
I'll be there to comfort you
Build my world of dreams around you
I'm so glad that I found you
I'll be there with a love thats strong
I'll be your strength; I'll keep holdin' on
Holdin' on, holdin' on, holdin' on, holdin on'
If you should ever find someone new
I know he'd better be it good to you
'Cause if he doesn't
I'll be there I'll be there
Don't you know baby yeah yeah I'll be there I'll be there
Just call my name, I'll be there
Just look over your shoulders honey, ooohhh
I'll be there I'll be there
They both listened as the chorus faded softly away.
"Mom, that was beautiful! But does it mean what I think it means?"
"Well, honey, I don't know what you think it means, but I'll tell you what it means to me, that is, what I thought when you father played it for me." She paused, not sure if she should tell Lizzie everything, for she had been a senior in high school when Sam used it to describe his feelings for her, and she was then four years older than Lizzie was now. She decided Lizzie was able to handle it all. She took a deep breath, and slowly started to explain.
"He loves you, he'll always be there if you need him, but if you ask him to back off, he will. If you get in trouble, he'll be there. If you tell him to go away, then need him, he'll be there. He just wants to be with you anyway he can, so if you decide at any time, that you love somebody else, he'll be there. Of course, it will hurt him not to be the one you love, but to see you happy is all that matters to him, because he won't make you do anything that would cause you pain, for it will cause him twice as much pain in return. If you choose another, and things don't work out, he'll be there to support and console you, hoping that he'll get one more chance with you, but he will never force you to make any decision against your will."
Lizzie tried to soak all that in. It was almost too much to comprehend. "It's weird. We DID make a pact, today, in fact. We promised each other that no matter what happened to either of us, that we would always stay close to each other in high school."
Her mother smiled. "Now that's exactly what I'm talking about. No matter what happens in high school, how many new friends you meet, whether you join clubs, or get jobs, or whatever, even if you chose another boy, and he, another girl, he will always be there when you need him most, and deep down, he will always love you."
I guess I never knew how good I had it, huh? Guess I should have tried to open my eyes to him earlier."
"Yeah, he's a real catch, and it's about time you figured that out!"
Both mother and daughter turned to the door, at the sound of the voice. Both spoke at the same time. "Matt! What are you doing here, how much did you hear?" "Matt! Get out of here, you little creep!"
"I came to apologize again for the mess out here, I heard enough, and I am not a creep!"
Lizzie glared at her sibling. She didn't need insults right now.
"Mom, can I talk to Lizzie alone for a minute, please?" Their mother hesitated, and looked at Lizzie. Lizzie didn't actually object, so she got up to leave.
"Matt, be nice, okay? Let me know when you are finished, your sister and I have more to discuss."
"Mom, trust me just once, please." As she left, he handed her $10. "It's all I have right now," he apologized.
Stunned, she left the room, then hid around the corner, curious.
"Lizzie, I didn't come here to insult you. I came to say I'm glad for you. I think Gordo and you being together would be great. I mean, you're always together anyways, just add kissing."
Lizzie blushed. "Matt!"
"Sorry, sis, but it's true. He'd also make an excellent brother-in-law."
Lizzie blushed more, then threw a pillow at her brother. "Out, Matt!"
"Okay, okay. Just don't tell anyone other than Gordo what I said, I don't want to ruin my reputation or anything. Well, you can tell Mom, but I'm sure she knows already, she's probably listening in right now." He tossed the pillow back, to Lizzie, and left the room.
Jo McGuire quickly changed her position, but Matt knew she had been listening, and she apologized. "It's ok, Mom. Really." She hugged him, and he went back to bed. Both her kids were growing up fast, but rather nicely. She picked up the papers from the hall, stuffed them in the bathroom trash, which was now almost overflowing, then went back to Lizzie's bedroom.
"Mom, Matt was just almost nice to me, can you believe it?"
"Honey, after what's happened today, I can believe almost anything."
"What mess was he talking about, Mom?"
"Oh, nothing for you to worry about. You know how I've wanted to clean the carpets for awhile? Let's just say that now is the perfect time."
Relieved that her mother told her not to worry, they again began to discuss matters of the heart. Finally, Lizzie was beginning to show she needed rest. It was just after midnight. Her unplanned nap had let her stay up a little more than usual, but not much.
Jo kissed her daughter on the forehead, messed up her hair, and gave her a hug, again, reassuring her that, whatever happened, she'd be around to do whatever Lizzie needed her to do. She shut down the computer, turned off the lights, and said "Good night."
Lizzie was tired, both physically, and emotionally. All the music she had listened to, brought back a song she thought she had long forgotten. It was silly to think of where it came from, but what did it matter? The Brady Bunch used to be one of her favorite TV shows. Miranda never cared much for it, but Gordo would sit with her for hours, through reruns they'd seen numerous times.
She loved the musical numbers that were in several episodes, and her mother informed her that they had made several albums of music from the show, but that was many years ago. After repeated requests from Lizzie, to get her some of the music, Jo did a little research and found that all the albums had been reissued on CD. She bought the whole set for Lizzie, and she was ever grateful.
She listened to them non-stop, but skipped over the "bonus" tracks at the end of each, they were from an album done by only two of the "Brady kids", "Marcia" and "Peter". One day, she let the CD's play all the way, and was surprised at a track tacked on to the second CD. It was at the beginning of fifth grade, and some of the lyrics fit, and some didn't. She had put the CD away, and not listened to any of them anymore. When Gordo asked her if she wanted to watch the Brady Bunch on reruns, she made an excuse, or tried to find something better.
She didn't need the light now. She reached into her closet, and found the CD, exactly where it had been for almost 4 years. She took a deep breath, then pulled out her portable CD player. No MP3's here. She grabbed her headphones from her desk, and plugged them in. She skipped ahead, and track #13 started to play as she lay back, and started to think...
I went into town, this afternoon,
To show the people my new tune,
And waiting for the elevator,
Who should I see, but the boy with the blue-gray eyes, who once belonged to me
Well, I just stood there frozen in the hall,
I knew my heart was backed against the wall.
I wonder how I sounded, when I said I'm doin' fine,
He has no business knowin' 'bout this lonely road of mine
'Cause now he has someone of his own,
And here I am in music land, just singin' alone
I guess it's just because he was the first,
But getting left behind hurts all the worst
Every day, the music smiles, and dances 'round my head,
Yet, every night I wish that he had stayed with me instead.
Yes, I guess you've got to give it time,
And life and love will come around, to rhyme,
And when it's right, it happens, just as easy as can be,
But it seems I sit and watch it come to everyone but me
'Cause now he has someone of his own,
And here I am in music land, just singin' alone
The lyrics meant much more now than four years ago. Gordo was the first. Crush, that is. And though she never considered him to "belong" to her, maybe that was how she would have felt, or should have felt, during Gordo's relationship with Brooke. All Parker got was one dance, but it made Lizzie feel almost empty inside. Miranda got to dance with Ethan, and she had to watch. She told herself then she was down because she was the only one who didn't have someone to dance with, but looking back now, she knew it was because somebody else was dancing with Gordo, and not her.
She turned off the CD player, set it on her desk, then laid back down, trying to sleep. After fifteen, twenty minutes, she was successful, but the strangest thing of all, that night, every one of her dreams seemed to have a soundtrack.
Lizzie woke up humming a song she couldn't place. She grabbed her watch, and looked at the time. "Oh no! I'm going to be late for school! Today, on the last day, of all days! Ahhh!"
She got dressed in three minutes flat, and rushed downstairs. "Hey, sleepyhead!" Her mother greeted her as she entered the kitchen.
"Mom! I'm going to be late! Why didn't you wake me up?"
"Relax, honey. I thought you could use a few more minutes. I'll give you a ride. You've got time. Go ahead, go back upstairs, and get dressed right."
Lizzie looked down at herself. Her shirt was tucked in on one side only, two buttons were buttoned wrong, her skirt was wrinkled, and her hair was in a messy ponytail. "Uh, okay." She turned to leave, then turned back. "Mom? Thanks." She hugged her mother, and a tear fell on her shoulder.
She broke away, and went upstairs, still humming the song she couldn't remember the name of. Twenty minutes later, Lizzie accepted a Pop Tart, and a juice box from her mother, as they got in the car to go to school. She had changed her clothes, fixed her hair, and felt refreshed.
Her mother turned on the radio, and adjusted it to find a good, peppy song. She left it on a station where a commercial was just ending, and soon, a happy tune filled the air.
I used to think maybe you loved me now baby I'm sure
And I just can't wait till the day when you knock on my door
Now everytime I go for the mailbox, gotta hold myself down
'Cause I just can't wait till you write me you're coming around
I'm walking on sunshine, woooah
I'm walking on sunshine, woooah
I'm walking on sunshine, woooah
and don't it feel good!!
Most times Lizzie would be ecstatic to listen to the radio in the morning. She sure didn't get to in the school bus. Usually, she would just bounce along with the music. But now, she found herself paying attention to the lyrics. Was she walking on sunshine? Not just yet, but maybe this afternoon.
For now, she had Gordo here. She didn't have to wait for him to write, and visit. But what would happen after graduation, if they went to seperate schools, and Gordo went away to become a famous director? Could she handle it? She chose not to think about it anymore. After all, like she had told her mother just last night, she was only fourteen. She had plenty of time to worry about that kind of stuff later.
She was relieved when they reached the school. "Mom? I'll be home early, remember only a half day today."
"Sure, honey, just give me a call if you decide to do something later. Here."
Her mother handed her several coins. Lizzie thanked her, then walked up to the school, looking for Gordo. Several students were inside already, but she wasn't late. She walked in, saw Gordo, and just had opened her mouth to speak, when the bell rang. They entered the classroom together, and, this time, sat side by side.
The day before, Gustav had been a "plant" to keep Lizzie and Gordo apart. Though Kate, Lizzie, and Larry had decided to keep Gustav's name secret when they had been accused of starting the food fight, after lunch yesterday, both Kate and Larry had approached him, told him what they had figured out several months ago. They said they were not going to turn him in, they just needed a favor. He didn't quite understand, but he was to sit next to Lizzie, to keep Gordo away, that was all. Kate and Larry knew there would be tension between the two after "the kiss", and thought it best to keep them apart, so that neither could be embarrassed. Too bad they hadn't asked Gustav to do the same today as well, the level of tension between Lizzie and Gordo yesterday was nothing compared to what it was now.
Mr. Dig addressed the class. "I know, you probably are wondering why I'm here, and not your regular teacher. They gave him the day off, so that he can chaperone tonight. Today is basically just a day for you to get your report cards, and clean out your lockers and desks. For anyone that forgot, today being the last day, school ends at 12:30. Graduation starts promptly at seven. Those of you who were in my last period study hall yesterday, will remember an assignment I gave you. Write what you are going to do for the summer, and what you wish you were going to do. At least three sentences of each. This was not an assignment I just made up, a teacher gave me the same assignment before vacation, when I was your age, but I had to do two pages on each subject. And I'd like to read for you now, what I wrote."
The class groaned in unison. They were glad they didn't have to do any work, but none of them wanted to hear Mr. Dig's paper. He droned on, and on, and Lizzie was unable to give him her complete attention. A note landed on her desk, and again, she carefully opened it, keeping an eye on her teacher.
Lizzie, did you listen to some of the CD? Nod for yes, shake for no.
Even though he was sitting right next to her, she nodded without looking at him. She continued to read.
If you are still willing to talk to me about it, would you please meet me at the park across from my house, at one o'clock? Nod for yes, shake for no. Gordo
Again she nodded, then glanced over at Gordo, who she found was already watching her. They both blushed and looked in opposite directions. She folded up the note, and attempted to get her mind back on what Mr. Dig was saying. He gave her a stern look, as if he had caught her. Then he smiled, and continued to read. It was alright! He wasn't upset!
The class finished, and everyone spent the rest of the morning cleaning, organizing, packing. Soon, it was time to leave, and everyone picked up their report cards, and even though they would all see each other in just a few hours, most shook hands, and said tearful goodbyes.
Larry kissed her hand, and bid her a fond farewell, winking at her in the process. Kate insulted her, then finding no one else nearby, gave her a quick hug, then jumped back, as if Lizzie was on fire. She quickly retreated. Ethan found her, and surprised her most of all by what he said.
"Lizzie, I'm sorry things between us could never work out. But don't worry, Gordo's a great guy, he truly cares for you, and you don't have to change a thing for him." He gave her a hug, then walked away. He had realized she had tried to change her image falsely to acquire his affection, but he was okay with it.
She walked out of the school, and looked over her report card. Three A's, Three B's, and an A- in Gym. She wondered how many of those B's would have been C's or A's been B's if not for Gordo's help. She felt so good today, she avoided the school bus, and walked to the park. School let out about the time she'd normally have lunch, and she should be hungry, but her stomach was full of butterflies instead.
She slowed her pace as she approached Gordo's street. He'd be home by now, but they weren't due to meet for another ten minutes. She stopped for a drink of water, then just like yesterday, sat on a swing, head down, letting her thoughts wander.
She looked up when she saw a shadow on the ground in front of her.
"Is this swing taken?"
She shook her head no, and Gordo sat next to her. He took a deep breath, but neither spoke.
Where to begin, where to begin?
A/N Way longer than the last chapter, this time though, it wasn't due so much to the amount of songs used, but by two things, 1) my little "filibuster" at the beginning, and 2) things are getting very detailed.
To everyone reading this story, whether you like it, or not, whether you review, or not, thanks again.
Review if you like, or email JP5683@msn.com or JP5683@webtv.net I respond to everyone.
Next chapter up Sunday night, or Monday morning.
Thanks,
JP
List of songs used in this chapter:
Monica - For You I Will
Jon Secada - Do You Believe In Us
Mariah Carey - Can't Let Go
Flamingos - I Only Have Eyes For You
Sam Cooke - Cupid
Doris Troy - Just One Look
Cornelius Brothers & Sister Rose - Too Late To Turn Back Now
John Michael Montgomery/All 4 One - I Swear
Randy Newman - Short People
Jackson 5/Mariah Carey - I'll Be There
Maureen McCormick - Just A' Singin' Alone
Katrina & The Waves - Walkin' On Sunshine
March 28, 2003