See Chapter 1 for disclaimer. Sorry this chapter is shorter than normal, I
should be updating more regularly now. I've had this chapter written for
over a month now, I would really appreciate some feedback as I'm quite
uncertain about it.
Chapter 8
I feel drained and I don't really understand why, my plan was working perfectly. It's an effort to hold a conversation with anyone, I just nod and say what is expected of me, a demure, innocent minister's daughter, and nobody has even guessed the truth about me.
I'm like a robot now, get up, do some chores, go to class, study, do more chores and then sleep. The repetition is kind of soothing; I don't have to think anymore, I just focus on my next task. If I have nothing to do, my mind fills itself with image of the damage that I- my mother could of done. So I help out with Sam and David more, do volunteer work at the church and study harder then I have ever done before and works I don't think, I just live. I work hard to stay out the house, the tension is unbearable. The house has never been this quiet; I think we're all scared that if we break the silence we'll explode.
Dad's back, he had a 'talk' with Captain Michaels, Mom is attending alcohol awareness classes under the guise of using the experience to educate the community about the dangers of alcohol. No criminal record, no shame and to most of the community she remains a paragon of morality.
No permanent changes seem to happen to Camdens, except marriage and children. Mary is the only one who has challenged this and she made mistakes, but she has her own life and she's happy. All it took was one half beer and our loving parents sent her to Buffalo, is it any wonder she hid her debts from them. Simon drank a lot more than half a beer at that party, but he's still here.
So for the last few weeks I've focused on nothing but study and being a good daughter, but it doesn't work anymore, I can't sleep and I don't want to leave my room. I've been hiding the truth from myself and I can't bear it any longer. When I set my mother up to drink drive, I became her, Annie Camden. I've turned into this manipulative, controlling and unpleasant person, the thing I feared I would turn into if I stayed here. I don't know if I can live with myself now. What do I do now? I lay my head on my desk and stare into space. What do I do now?
Chapter 8
I feel drained and I don't really understand why, my plan was working perfectly. It's an effort to hold a conversation with anyone, I just nod and say what is expected of me, a demure, innocent minister's daughter, and nobody has even guessed the truth about me.
I'm like a robot now, get up, do some chores, go to class, study, do more chores and then sleep. The repetition is kind of soothing; I don't have to think anymore, I just focus on my next task. If I have nothing to do, my mind fills itself with image of the damage that I- my mother could of done. So I help out with Sam and David more, do volunteer work at the church and study harder then I have ever done before and works I don't think, I just live. I work hard to stay out the house, the tension is unbearable. The house has never been this quiet; I think we're all scared that if we break the silence we'll explode.
Dad's back, he had a 'talk' with Captain Michaels, Mom is attending alcohol awareness classes under the guise of using the experience to educate the community about the dangers of alcohol. No criminal record, no shame and to most of the community she remains a paragon of morality.
No permanent changes seem to happen to Camdens, except marriage and children. Mary is the only one who has challenged this and she made mistakes, but she has her own life and she's happy. All it took was one half beer and our loving parents sent her to Buffalo, is it any wonder she hid her debts from them. Simon drank a lot more than half a beer at that party, but he's still here.
So for the last few weeks I've focused on nothing but study and being a good daughter, but it doesn't work anymore, I can't sleep and I don't want to leave my room. I've been hiding the truth from myself and I can't bear it any longer. When I set my mother up to drink drive, I became her, Annie Camden. I've turned into this manipulative, controlling and unpleasant person, the thing I feared I would turn into if I stayed here. I don't know if I can live with myself now. What do I do now? I lay my head on my desk and stare into space. What do I do now?