Kamitari: Chapter four is once more written by meeee. Kao-chan will TRY and update the fic when she can but she's busy. She has so many exams x.x Damned exams... CURSE YOU!!! Anyway... *smoothes clothes* why did Kaoru break down all of a sudden? Why did she just cry? Isn't she supposed to be one of the strongest, most skilled and stealthiest assassins? I'm not asking them... I'm giving you points to ponder on until the end of the chapter, where, hopefully, the answers will be revealed. Hope you like! We will never own RK unless we were people like the dude who has copyright for RK in Sony and Nobuhiro Watsuki. Ah yes, this is mostly a Kenshin's POV sorta chapter. He's battling with the feelings of his heart, and the decisions of his mind n_n; So it's all flash-backy x.x Or maybe not... eh... just read ^^;

Blood Stained Hearts : Battling with my Mind and with my Heart

:: + ::

Kenshin was panic-stricken at the site of Kaoru, just crying there, like a helpless child. Kenshin thought all the while, that for the past five years, he had hated her, he had loathed her, he had wanted to kill her, but his mind was denying his heart of the true feelings he really felt for her. During those long five years, Kenshin wanted to be beside her, be the one she trained with, be the one she depended on, but he couldn't. He was always sent on a mission every time Kaoru had been freed from her training. If he was free on the other hand, she wasn't because she was training. He had always wanted to say how he felt about her, but the fact that he had a reputation of being a cold hearted killer, stopped him from doing so. Was now a good time to say how he really felt about the girl? He looked at her tear-stained face once more before standing up and leaving the kitchen. Kaoru stopped crying for a while, just catching a glimpse of Kenshin's retreating figure, thinking that he didn't care about her, not that she cared for him anyway, and thinking that he didn't want to see an assassin, namely her, cry the tears of her heart out into the open. With that, tears fell from her face and she began crying once more.

:: + ::

"Damn it, why can't I just face my fears?!" cursed Kenshin as he slammed his fist onto the wall in his room. He was there to contemplate his feelings, his heart's feelings, and his mind's thoughts. His eyes were a furious shade of violet; he still wasn't angered, lost and confused. He was just one of the three at the moment.

"Why can't I tell her? Is it because I'm afraid of her? No, that's not possible. Is it because I mocked her during these past five years?! Could be it... Is it because I'm afraid she'll reject me?! Most definitely it," thought Kenshin as he mentally battled with himself, before sitting down in the center of the futon. Kenshin sighed a little as he recalled the countless times he had purposely pissed her off for his enjoyment. At that time, he really didn't know how he felt about her, but after seeing her being so vulnerable, as powerful as she is, he felt strangely different around her, as if he wanted to right all the wrongs ever done to her.

"Gah... why now... why not after the war?!" growled Kenshin as he slammed his fist on the floor. Kaoru's tears and sobs were still heard in the place, maybe not for Sano since he was still asleep. Kenshin felt slightly bad slightly not caring at all what was happening, he was in serious need of SOME psychological help.

"Where's the god damned psychological help when you need it?!" cursed Kenshin out loud as he clenched his fists even tighter.

:: + :: Mental Argument :: + ::

"BAKA DESHI!" yelled an oh so familiar voice in his mind.

"Shi-shi-shishou?! What are YOU doing here?! I left the mountain at least five years ago!" cried out Kenshin.

"Eh... what can I say... I'm just a disembodied thought faraway from my true origin... anyway... YOU ARE AN IDIOT! Why did you leave for the war when I specifically told you NOT to," growled Hiko.

"Because I believed in it! HECK! Kamiya sacrificed her family's love for her in order to pursue her beliefs!" shot back Kenshin.

"That's exactly what you did right? Except this time, I'm not exactly your father, or anyone related to you," growled Hiko.

"What?! Just because I did it to doesn't mean that it's all my fault on why she's crying!!!" growled Kenshin.

"It is, in a sense. You didn't treat her the way she needed to be treated."

"But she treats me exactly the same way I treat her!"

"Because that's how you WANT to be treated, as if you were mere nothingness, Kamiya on the other hand has a more fragile heart!"

"Gee... I wonder how this helps me... anyway... I'm still NOT changing how I feel about her... she's not my type."

"Then what is your type?"

"Well... you know... those girls who are-- Hey... wait a minute... I DON'T HAVE A THING FOR GIRLS!!! Goodbye shishou," grumbled Kenshin as he blocked all thoughts coming from Hiko. Kenshin's violet eyes looked in the direction of the kitchen, where Kaoru would probably still be by now, crying. Either that or her tears were subsiding. He spent the next hour or two contemplating on his thoughts and feelings for the female assassin whom he was always forced to work with.

:: + ::

Kenshin, for some reason, fell asleep, dreaming about a certain raven haired girl. Everything he thought about, seemed to be connected to her, and his mind wandered to her face, to her eyes, to her voice, never to her smile. She never smiled, not once, and if she did, no one was ever alive to tell the others how it looked like... except for her parents, who were somewhere there, in Japan, probably never wanting to talk about their only daughter, who became an assassin, and killed countless lives without mercy.

"Damn it," mumbled Kenshin as he snapped awake. He didn't want to think about her, he didn't want anything to do with her, but whatever he thought or did, it was always somehow connected to Kaoru. He shook his head, trying to remove all thoughts of the other assassin, but to his disappointment, and maybe to his delight as well, he couldn't remove his mind off of her.

"Why the hell am I thinking about HER? I mean... I could be thinking of a way to get out of here but no... It just has to be about HER!" cursed Kenshin as he rubbed his temples. He still couldn't stop thinking about her. Everything, as if he couldn't live without her.

"GAH! Can't I just think about something else?!" growled Kenshin out loud. This time, Kaoru had heard him. Her tears had subsided though her face was still tear-stained since she was too tired to wipe her face dry. Kaoru looked over to where Kenshin was staying as she stood up. She looked around desperately for a damp cloth to wash her face with. Finding one, she took it and wiped her face clean of any tear stains before walking over to where Kenshin was.

"What are you trying to forget, Himura?" asked Kaoru with a somewhat cold voice, as if she forgot all about earlier.

"Nothing you should bother yourself with, Kamiya," replied Kenshin nonchalantly. When she had called him 'Himura' rather than Kenshin, he felt a pang of pain course through his body. He didn't understand why it happened but all he knew was that it did.

"Fine, just trying to be concerned," taunted Kaoru slightly, noticing the fact that he was going soft, a little softer than usual anyway.

"You don't need to care about me. I don't need someone's support to stand, unlike you," replied Kenshin as he closed his eyes and crossed his arms. Kaoru grimaced at his words. She walked up to him and slapped him on the face, really hard.

"I may need emotional support as you don't know how rickety my childhood was before this war but that doesn't mean people like you can torture me about it. I lost everything, everything, because of what I believe in. I lost my mom, my dad, my home. Now, even after the war is over, I DON'T HAVE A HOME TO GO TO! I lost it all because I wanted to do what I thought was right. I can tell why my father doesn't want me back in Tokyo... because I'm using the Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu for killing, rather than protecting the lives of the oppressed and helpless!" spat Kaoru angrily as tears started to blur her vision once more. Kenshin rubbed his sore cheek slightly. Sighing, he too snapped.

"Well, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW IT IS TO SEE YOUR FAMILY MASSACRED RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR EYES!" spat Kenshin angrily as he stood up to face the other assassin.

"You on the other hand don't know how hard it is to be accepted here! You're not a girl! I am! People prefer to have men do their bidding! I'm a girl! PLEASE! It took me FIVE goddamn years for people to know I'm just as good as everyone! I'm just as good as you!" snapped Kaoru.

"You don't know how it is to leave a school and not finish it completely! Heck! I may be the best assassin the Ishin Shishi has got along with you but unlike you, I HAVEN'T FINISHED THE HITEN MITSURUGI RYUU! I never learned the Ama Kakeru Ryuno Hirameki, its succession technique!"

"Yes! But at least your master isn't your immediate family! Don't you know how much it hurts when they say they don't love you anymore?! When I went to Tokyo, alone, on another mission, I went to the house of my family quietly and spied on them! I sat on a tree and I watched them. That was last year; on the day I left home to join the Ishin Shishi. They were burning my things, they were forgetting all about me! DON'T YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURTS?!" snapped Kaoru as she clenched her fists tightly.

"Unfortunately, I don't, but you weren't nearly sold to pirates now were you?" snapped Kenshin angrily. With that, Kaoru just burst into tears once more, her heart needing some serious mending. Kenshin just looked at her, slightly pained at the fact that he, again, caused her to cry.

"Why am I feeling this way towards her? As if I want to hold her in my arms, and comfort her, to forget everything and anything bad that happened or is happening to her," said Kenshin mentally as he looked at the sobbing girl. Unconsciously, Kenshin walked towards Kaoru, kneeled in front of her, and just hugged her, not really knowing what to do. Kaoru looked at the blackness in front of her, which wasn't so black because she saw strands of red here and there.

"Ken--shin?" murmured Kaoru softly as the tears began to subside once more. Kenshin just sighed and hushed her and let her continue crying on his chest. He felt slightly happy that he was doing this. Soon, Kaoru pushed him lightly aside, curiosity filling her face.

"Why did you do that?" asked Kaoru quietly as she pressed the damp cloth once more onto her face.

"I don't know... it felt right... after treating you the way I did for five years..." replied Kenshin quietly as he sat down in his place. Kaoru only nodded briefly before remembering how good it felt to be in his arms, as if she belonged there. She blushed slightly at the thought before rising and leaving the room.

Kenshin looked at her retreating figure and sighed, "At least she's not THAT mad at me anymore..."

:: + :: Ishin Shishi Headquarters :: + ::

"YOU WHAT?!" shouted Katsura as he slammed his fist on the table.

"We-we-we-we- left them in the Mizuwata forest," said a much younger yet capable assassin.

"WHY DID YOU DO THAT?! WHO KNOWS WHAT'LL HAPPEN?! THAT'S THE FOREST NO ONE CAN FREE THEMSELVES FROM!!!" snapped Katsura as he slammed his fist repeatedly on the table, "Who knows that the Shinsengumi scum are going to plan to do to us next! They know that with those two out of the way, it'll be easier to slay the next official we were assigned to protect!"

"I'll go fetch them from the forest," piped in a man who had a grin plastered inwardly.

"What?! You?! ICHIRO?! I might as well bet my life with the Shinsengumi if you think I'll assign to you to find Battousai and Kurai no Musume!" said Katsura in rage. He never said their real names openly to most of the assassins. He, Kenshin and Kaoru were the only ones who really were ever able to call them by their first names. The others would just call Kenshin, Battousai or Himura and they would call Kaoru, Kurai no Musume or Kamiya, never Kenshin or Kaoru respectively.

"But I can handle this, Katsura! I know I can! Only if you give me a chance!" argued Ichiro.

"No, you don't know how much the Ishin Shishi needs them. I need to assign someone of their level or close to it, not someone who just started working for us. Tough luck Ichiro but I can't assign you on this... you can't even be part of the group that will go with the person I'm assigning this to," said Katsura, "Iwata, go with nine other assassins to Mizuwata Forest and be sure you don't come back here without Battousai and Kurai no Musume." The man called Iwata nodded. He summoned nine other assassins of his level. He bowed respectfully in front of Katsura as did the other nine before leaving the place.

"Why can't I go, Katsura?!" said Ichiro as he looked back at the older man.

"Because, you're an easy target for the Shinsengumi and one mistake could be fatal," growled Katsura, "Go on, go sharpen your skills, you have a mission to prepare for." Ichiro nodded stiffly as he walked to where he would be practicing his sword skills. As soon as he stepped out of the room, he groaned and continued walking to where he would be practicing... that is... until he bumped into a certain raven haired doctor.

"Gomen, Ichiro-san," said Ameyama as she bowed slightly. Ichiro just shrugged it off leaving Ameyama to pick up her fallen materials.

"I sometimes wonder what he has in mind," said Ameyama to herself as she picked the materials up and set them down in the box she was carrying.

:: + :: Mizuwata Forest :: + ::

The tension that used to fill Kenshin and Kaoru's feelings for each other disappeared more as time passed on. They were somewhat able to say hello to each other, without one of them snapping. It felt slightly good to the both of them to be able to talk together freely. Sano, the boy from yesterday, decided that he was going to stay somewhere else, probably a more peaceful place so he packed his very few things, along with a lunch that Kaoru prepared for him and left the lives of the two, probably forever, probably not, who knows, they might meet again somewhere in the future.

"Kenshin?" asked Kaoru as she wiped some beads of sweat off of her forehead. Kenshin didn't answer. He was looking longingly at her; he wanted to make her his own territory.

"Kenshin?" asked Kaoru again, this time, directing her attention to the red haired assassin. Kenshin still didn't answer. He stood up, and walked cautiously towards her. Kaoru was looking nervously at the stronger assassin as he bent his head down slightly and captured her lips in his own, not brushing past them anymore. Kaoru instinctively put her hands on his chest, as if she was going to push him away, but no, they just remained there. Good thing that Kaoru was just boiling water, or else, they'd be in big trouble if the food burnt.

:: + ::

Kamitari: Gomen! Gomen! Gomen! Gomen for making you wait! Yesh! I know! The ending is sappy ^^; And Kenshin fell in love too quickly, can't really say the same for Kaoru but eh, they knew each other for five years and if you read the earlier portions, Kenshin fell in love with her during those five years, just that he couldn't be with her whenever he was free or whenever she was free and don't forget about his reputation being cold-hearted assassin! Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter and review onegai! If you read my random ramblings, please put 'Sakabatou' at the end of your review or something n_n;;; Now press that button!