A Sexy Jutsu
By Mukumuku
Disclaimer She was an author, she hailed from Canada where it snowed, it's snowed, it snowed. He was a mangaka who hailed from Japan, he wrote of ninja's who turned into women. His name was Kishimoto-senei. Her name was Mukumuku. She took his work, crediting him with all her glory that the angels smiled down from the heavens and then justice lived again. Justice lived again.
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"I love you," Naruto looked up at Sasuke. He had not changed out of his Hokage's clothing after returning from his duties in the village. Sasuke was a very busy man and not being able to reach the rank of Hokage, Naruto ended up supporting him with meals and what he needed.
"Shouldn't you be." Sasuke interrupted Naruto with his kisses. Sasuke had not seen Naruto for three months and he was getting overworked. He needed to relieve stress.
"Paperwork can wait," Sasuke brushed a strand of hair out of Naruto's eyes. "We still haven't."
Sasuke pushed Naruto on the couch and pinned him down so that he couldn't protest. "Sasuke!"
Sasuke started to slip his hand into Naruto's pants. "How am I supposed to take my husbandly duties seriously if I can't even get with my wife?"
Naruto frowned, Sasuke was saying this now but he knew everyone would be on his ass later if Sasuke didn't hurry his behind off to his next meeting. "I'm not you wife!" Naruto gritted him teeth and shoved his hand against Sasuke's cheek. "I'm your lover. Be more romantic."
Sasuke cocked an eye and examined Naruto's clothing. He was wearing his normal orange outfit with some slight alterations here and there. His precious headpiece was removed and placed on the table. Sasuke tugged at the article of clothing around Naruto's waist, cocking his eye. "A lover that wears a frilly apron?"
The stealthy Sasuke leaned in for another attempted stolen kiss. Naruto intercepted and placed a finger on his lips. "You have a meeting today at lunch."
Sasuke grimaced, started thinking and stopped. He started to tug at his own clothing. "Screw it."
Naruto grabbed Sasuke's earlobe and blew in his ear. Sasuke blushed and made a move to remove his pants when Naruto whispered in a husky voice, "even one with Raikage?"
Sasuke moaned he looked through his head. "Tomorrow how about."
Naruto a step ahead cut him off. "You have a meeting to discuss project funding."
Sasuke bit his lip. He looked through his memory harder. "We continue this on---"
"You're booked until the end of the month with things you can't cancel." Naruto and Sasuke where now sitting on opposite ends of the love seat. Sasuke looked at Naruto, rubbing his temple. Naruto sighed and went into the kitchen to make Sasuke some tea.
Sasuke dropped his head and sighed. "I'm sorry."
Naruto slipped his fingers around the kettle handle concentrating his thoughts on pouring water, "I know."
Naruto suddenly paused and remembered something Sasuke could put off. It was his lucky day. "Oh yeah. And some villagers said they wanted to talk to you this afternoon, said it was important. No details." Naruto turned from his slowly boiling water and beamed, "you think you can put it off."
Sasuke's eyes widened. He turned away so he didn't have to face Naruto. "I can't. It's important. You know. village stuff."
Naruto's heart stopped.
Sasuke was the Hokage. He was always improving the quality of the village making everyone happy. The Hokage was always great. Everyone adored him. People aspired to be like him. Sasuke was worshipped in school and Naruto was wrong thinking that he could beat Sasuke out there. As if he could ever be as loved as Sasuke. Respected as Sasuke.
Being Sasuke's lover made it even harder. Now they hated him for being loved by Sasuke, he had to get his mind off of it.
"Oh. What's it about." Naruto inquired.
Sasuke stilled looked out the window, "I'm not obliged to say."
Naruto was hurt for a second. When had he and Sasuke grown apart? He never usually tried to pry into his life as others did. But he felt like.
Naruto flashed his teeth in a smile to reassure Sasuke that it was okay. "C'mon Sasuke, you have several minutes." Naruto bowed down to the Hokage in a respectful manner, something he only did away from the prying eyes of persecutors. Naruto jokingly batted his eyelashes, "please? For me?"
Sasuke turned around slowly and looked at Naruto cold and unfeeling.
Naruto felt a pang of raw emotion, as if Sasuke wasn't looking at him at all.
As if he was looking through Naruto. As he were looking at someone else. A killer, a rapist, a monster. Naruto stepped back knocking the kettle off the stove. Naruto panicked. He thought rapidly, choking on air. 'Sasuke. Not you too! Anyone. Anyone but you!'
Naruto edged closer to the stove trying to create as much distance as possible that he felt the heat, it was too hot. He was sweating. But that was because Naruto was afraid of turning his back on Sasuke. He reached him hand behind him to turn the heat off, blindly.
Sasuke spoke. It was like time freezing as a thousand kunai's hit Naruto's heart. "It's about you."
That's when Naruto burned himself.
{Memory End} -------------------
Kazekage and Hokage looked at their teacups, trying to avoid eye contact with each other. The meeting had broken out into a verbal fight in which Gaara started to insult Sasuke on his tactics and that Sasuke was a coward trying to erase the Sand Village. Sasuke returned the fact that Gaara was an incompetent leader and a killer, at that. Morimoto, Teguchi and Kankuro who sat behind Gaara decided they needed a break then and there to cool off.
Sasuke sipped the tea. 'Naruto used to make me tea like this all the time.' He clutched the cup in his hand afraid of loosing the memory. He looked up at a blissful Gaara. Gaara noticed Sasuke's watching him, but he feigned disinterest.
Gaara knew things about Sasuke. Things he was afraid to tell Naruto, things that he could use against Sasuke to keep him away. Make him realize that he was unworthy of the fox possessed boy.
"I heard a rumor that you---" Sasuke's eyes burned with anger and he reached into his pouch retrieving a throwing weapon. His hearing shut off but knew what Gaara was saying. Gaara was mocking him.
Once his hearing came back he settled his weapon in his lap. He breathed in and out, trying to retrieve his common sense.
Gaara looked up and smiled, "congratulations, Sasuke."
Lee and Neji stepped forward and held Sasuke back from Gaara he sat quietly, not noticing Sasuke's shouting and attempting to escape from their grips. Gaara looked through his paper, "wow. We could use the money for that one," Gaara thought aloud not even noticing his attempted murder.
"Shut up!" Sasuke pointed a kunai at Gaara's throat, his eyes glowing with anger. "Don't talk about them lightly like that! I'll kill you."
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"Natsume! Try this! On!" Sakura handed Natsume another dress. Naruto added it to the pile of growing shirts and dresses. Natsume sighed, Naruto knew he was going to be a woman. But this was overkill.
Temari smiled and nodded, "I agree, it'd look great on you. Natsume, Sakura, I'm going to go check out the lingerie store across the street. I'll be back."
"Okay, Temari." Even though one could not see his facial features Hatake Kakashi was grinning happily, for the day he was given permission to be Temari's fashion advisor and now Temari was dressed better than ever. He followed after Temari like a puppy, almost skipping to the lingerie store.
Natsume headed to that back room of the store where many of the stalls were white and unworn clothing and department hangers lay strewn on the ground. He chose the cleanest stall and kicked the unworn clothing out the stall door. Sakura followed her and stopped in front of the closing door. Natsume poked her head out the semi-closed door and smiled.
Sakura looked a bit trouble, Naruto knew she had something to say now. Naruto moaned internally. "Is it okay if I talked to you while you dressed?"
Natsume shrugged, "sure? Why not."
Sakura decided to start out by introducing Naruto. "You may not know this, but it was quite famous news around Leaf Village," Naruto tore off his ruined shirt with annoyance. He knew the story Sakura spoke of. They were still talking about him after three years, even though they acted as if he never existed. "When Sasuke first became our Hokage in Leaf Village, Sasuke was in love with a man named Naruto."
"I heard rumors about it." Natsume replied with the frustration of removing her pants.
"It was said that Naruto was the reincarnation of the nine tails fox." Sakura held the memory of their friendship in her mind. "Naruto was such a nice guy."
Sakura bit back her anger and repulsion, "Naruto was hated by the villagers, one day he disappeared for no reason. When he came back he was practically ripped apart." Sakura shuddered at the memory. She had heard some Genin had found him half-alive. "Something human or more like inhuman, since what they did to Naruto was cruel. Not even animals were that cruel."
"Three days later Naruto left and went missing. He's missing today." Sakura finished off the history for Natsume. 'She must not know her connection to Sasuke. I should tell her.'
"Aya, you look a lot like Naruto," Naruto held back his laughter. If she only knew, he looked at his dress. It was the only one her considered trying on. He hated it. He was re-buying the same shirt over so that was settled. He moved to unlock the door when Sakura spoke again. "Are you a Sasuke seeker?"
"Huh?" Naruto paused. How much had changed in three years? Sasuke Seekers?
"They're women who sometimes dress up like Naruto and try to win Sasuke's heart. They think that being Sasuke's wife will lead them to fame and fortune and they're somewhat right." Sakura knew this, as long as Sasuke had a Sasuke Seeker in his favour, she saw her old dream coming true.
"After the event people found out about Naruto and Sasuke and the women started to dress like him. They thought it was what he liked," she remembered trying on Naruto's clothing with Ino when they were cleaning out his house. How much they had laughed at Naruto's expense, "I thought it was really funny for a while. They had a fanclub for him and everything. I was a member for a short period of time."
"And then." Sakura had to tell Natsume-sensei. She knew she had to tell her, because she was not a Sasuke Seeker and that Sasuke deserved to get a descent woman like Aya. "Sasuke started to date them. But what he really wanted to do was rebuild his life and have a family."
Naruto closed his eyes. He didn't want to hear this.
"He ended up getting a friend of mine pregnant," Sakura paused as she heard the clatter of hangers fall to the ground.
'No.' Naruto knew that Sasuke would not stay with him forever. It was just.
"Are you okay Natsume?"
"It's just the shock." Naruto faked a laugh.
Sakura tried to act as if she weren't sad reminiscing about Sasuke's past. "He ended up doing the right thing and married her but. She was like the others, looking to get with Sasuke." Sakura remembered her friend, how happy she had been. Sakura had started going out with Lee shortly after. "But, she was different. For a short while Sasuke was really, really happy."
Natsume paused in her tracks, 'is that why Sasuke looking so tired out? Did she leave him or cheat on him?'
Sakura paused. It was hard for her, saying the next part. "She died giving birth to a son." Naruto leaned against the stall putting her shorts back on, 'so that's what happened..."
"Her name was Yamaka Ino, she was a friend of mine."
Naruto paused, Ino? Ino. He remembered her. At least it was someone he knew. Someone who was desperately in love with a man that no one dared to love and dared to love no one. Not even Naruto, who he tried to desperately. He understood her feelings and knew that Sasuke would not stay single forever. If it were someone else, he'd be upset. But. Ino was just like him, madly in love with Sasuke.
Naruto felt guilty. He never thought Ino would die though. Ino looked to be a strong ninja. 'But I guess it doesn't change the fact that she died.' Naruto gathered his unwanted clothing in a messy pile. 'Already someone has died for my choice. But. I guess that those few years Ino had with Sasuke would have been the happiest of her life."
Sakura continued on, raising her finger in the air recalling the image of Sasuke's son. She remembered the day he was born, looking a lot like a mini Sasuke. Born with a frown. "His son is really cute, his name is Daisuke. He was born almost a year ago. Sasuke didn't even know what to do with him when Daisuke was first born, but now Sasuke's a proud father." Naruto created an image of Sasuke trying to feed a crying child that refused milk. He couldn't believe it, if only he was there to see it. "He's all right now, he's with Ino's parents now that Sasuke's on a trip."
Sakura. Was trying to get him to like Sasuke. Naruto decided not to take that bait. He closed his eyes and spoke with clarity. "I love Gaara."
Sakura remembered the closeness he's seen with Gaara and Natsume, such closeness. "I know. I wanted to tell you if Sasuke falls for you, he's only looking for Naruto." Sakura knew in her heart it was better to tell Natsume the truth about Sasuke, Sasuke would be relentless in his pursuit. Because of all the women she bore not only the haze of Naruto, but she also had the kindness that Ino had shown him and motherly instinct that Daisuke required. Natsume opened the door, she had chosen to buy the angel wings shirt and wore it. Natsume tucked the ripped shirt under her arm "But. If you're really willing to give him a chance, please be good to Daisuke and please take care of Sasuke."
Natsume nodded to Sakura, making eye contact with the mature woman that he had not had the pleasure of knowing in depth. He walked to the cashier, his mind occupied with thoughts of Sasuke, Ino, and Sakura as children he had grown up with.
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[Oh no, SELF INSERT/]
Mukumuku: Hah hah. Made you believe Sasuke wasn't a father.
Audience Member: But didn't you say something like: "Sasuke? A father?" Like he wasn't a father? Unprove that!
Mukumuku: That was me talking! That was my author's voice slipping in, if it wasn't an author's voice it'd be in brackets. Bwah ha hah~!
Audience: Booooo! Stop lying to us and covering up your mistakes.
Mukumuku: That's not true, I planned this from the beginning! To lead you on!
Audience member: That's diabolically evil! To us and Sasuke!
(Sasuke is weeping in the background)
Mukumuku: Hey you. I didn't ask for your opinion. I in the fanfic writer. AM GOD!
(Background: On a banner, "Mary Sue Forever"]
Audience: (All whispering:) Let's kill her.
[/SELF INSERT END, bloody death by mass mauling.]
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Many women hid their disgust as they watched Kakashi look through the panty pile at the women's lingerie store. 'I don't know what's their problem is. I'm enjoying myself immensely and I'm helping Temari find a cute design.' Kakashi flipped through the multicolored panties with stride.
Iruka returning from the long line up at market breathed heavily, looking around to see if he could find Kakashi and the others. He looked up to see a sight that would take his breath away.
Kakashi in a woman's lingerie store, buying panties. "KAKASHI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE!?" Iruka gasped for his breath back, he felt like a mother with a two-year-old that had knocked over a display case of expensive china.
Kakashi lifted up a pair of pink panties, high so that Iruka could see. Kakashi didn't even have to remove a single weapon for the death move.
"This is your color---" Iruka's heart exploded, he dropped the bags of groceries he was holding. A lone apple slipped out of a bag and rolled. Kakashi finished his sentence with pride, "---Temari."
"Oh thanks! I'd look and feel great in this!" Temari looked at the color, thankful of Kakashi's good taste and style. Besides, every woman needed a gay friend. She passed Hinata on the way to the sales clerk. Hinata was pawing through the lacy cream colored bras, unable to pick up the one she wanted. She didn't want her Academy teacher to see the bras she was to wear, even though she knew which one she wanted to buy. "Iruka-sensei."
Iruka was watching her for a while. She looked embarrassed and he didn't understand why until he realized the reason. "I'm. I'm. I'm sorry. Hi-hi- Hinata!" He attempted to nudge Kakashi away who was already looking through the racks of bondage outfits. "Ca-Can-Can I talk to you for a second?"
"Me?" Hinata had picked up the bra and was trying her best to crumple and hide it from Iruka.
"N-n-no!" Iruka stammered.
"Me." Temari pointed to herself from across the store as the sales clerk was folding away her goods.
"NO!" Iruka shook his head frustrated. He looked at the apple that had fallen on the ground. It lay outside the store, slightly bruised. "Kaka- Kakashi!"
Kakashi was playing with a crop, testing it out on a scantily clad mannequin. Kakashi looked up from the mannequin with an evil glint in his eye, "what's wrong?"
Iruka shoved the groceries in Kakashi's arms, tossed the crop into the air which it landed in the panty pile. He hurried his lover out of the store. A safe distance away from where he threw the crop.
He picked up the apple and began to clean it on his clothing, looking around nervously. Kakashi blinked, wishing he still had the crop in his hands. Iruka manage to get out his jumbled words finally with a lot of effort. "IhavetotellsomeonethatnatsumeayisnarutoorI'mgoingtoexplode!"
"Natsume is Naruto, I had an inkling it was him." Kakashi scratched his head, "but if it wasn't and you were telling the truth I was going to ask her to join us."
Iruka paused. 'Join us.' It took a long time for Iruka to register what Kakashi was saying. "Join us?! Kaka. Kaka. Kakashi?!" Iruka was turning as bright red as the apple he clutched and was diverting his embarrassment into it.
"Hey, that means I'll just find another way to spice up our sex life," not that he was bored, Iruka needed a lot of coaxing to even get into bed. He needed to be in the mood and he had tried all the normal stuff he could to get Iruka in the mood. "Naruto's technique is pretty nice."
Iruka blushed more and fed up with nonsense, he looked Kakashi in the eye. "I'm not being a woman," Iruka said straight out, taking back the groceries into his arms.
Kakashi wandered back into the store much to Iruka's dismay and reached onto the self pulling a feminine piece of lingerie and holding it to his body.
"How would I look in this?" Kakashi teased.
Iruka's heart exploded for the second time in that day.
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Author's Note:
Oww.. My stomache. Anywho! Poor Ino died. I had to sacrifice someone. And I though, why not Ino? You win some. You lose some. Actually I did plan it out this way, somewhat, but I screwed up some writing. I then thought. Dagnabit! Leave it in.
If I have some spelling errors forgive my soul so it may pass onto heaven.
Half wrote chapter five, will have Gaara, Sasuke and Naruto in the bathroom together.
IN THE NUDE!
Atomstar, can you see my spelling mistakes when you re-read my fanfic. I do. (Tears.) taikoubou42, you have the same wish as many. Hazar! (Reads list:) Vampire Goddess Jekyll (may your dreams come true!), Lady Dragon, Silver reviewed thrice! And Pantantlantic, um.. Dan Inverse. I shall grant it now! .
There.
It's done.
WuffieLuver, I've made it harder. Sasuke's got issues and Gaara's. He's cool. Athravan, I hope this chapter suits you. I promise you more angst and less Mary-sueism!
M-i, I'm joking! He does!
Sun. Don't worry. There's going be. (trails off)
SW, sorry for all the past revealing killing the humor. Added Kakashi spice. Kakashi wants a more interesting love life. (nods)
Cheryl-san, Naruto's "special" Genins are essential herbal essences for this fanfic! They're parallels of his old genin team. Jin=Sasuke Jacques=Naruto Yuri=God knows who! Lee will come soon! He will sweep Sakura away to their love room!
Nora D, I'm glad you're okay with Jacques. Whew!
Nemi, I though Lee would be twice as ugly and ten times as charming to make up.
Kakashi wants to utilize it for a better sex life. See, review and your dreams come true. Go thank Shadow of Arashi for that one.
Kira, you had me gasping for a second. Forgive my OOC. They're older and angsty. Neko Nicole. I have a chapter for you. I promise you more. N-oooo! Tsuki-tsu-ten-tsu-tsu--- aw, too long.
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Next time on a very special A Sexy Jutsu
We're previewing ahead to god knows what chapter.
Naruto finally takes his long awaited bath.
Naruto. Don't bathe in the Kage's special bathroom. Kages bathe there. That means Sasuke and Gaara. And is there any room for Sasuke x Gaara/Gaara x Sasuke in an already Sasuke x Naruto, Gaara x Naruto fanfic. Gaara. Your mascara scares me. Where are you eyebrows?
Naruto. Don't invite horny people into your house if you intend to sleep tonight. Kakashi looks good in lingerie. Can Iruka resist having sex in his pupil's house? Apparently not. But Mukmuku can't write sex scenes so it's going to be okay.
Naruto, don't accept invitations you can accept. Naruto, don't date two people at once.
Naruto. Naruto? Naruto. Noooooooooo!!!
Mukumuku needs to get chapter 5 and 6 and possibly 7 uploaded on the same day. For some drastic changes and some super love. Be there. Or be square.
[Review or Naruto ends up with Orochimaru. And if you want that. Review some more.]
Disclaimer She was an author, she hailed from Canada where it snowed, it's snowed, it snowed. He was a mangaka who hailed from Japan, he wrote of ninja's who turned into women. His name was Kishimoto-senei. Her name was Mukumuku. She took his work, crediting him with all her glory that the angels smiled down from the heavens and then justice lived again. Justice lived again.
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"I love you," Naruto looked up at Sasuke. He had not changed out of his Hokage's clothing after returning from his duties in the village. Sasuke was a very busy man and not being able to reach the rank of Hokage, Naruto ended up supporting him with meals and what he needed.
"Shouldn't you be." Sasuke interrupted Naruto with his kisses. Sasuke had not seen Naruto for three months and he was getting overworked. He needed to relieve stress.
"Paperwork can wait," Sasuke brushed a strand of hair out of Naruto's eyes. "We still haven't."
Sasuke pushed Naruto on the couch and pinned him down so that he couldn't protest. "Sasuke!"
Sasuke started to slip his hand into Naruto's pants. "How am I supposed to take my husbandly duties seriously if I can't even get with my wife?"
Naruto frowned, Sasuke was saying this now but he knew everyone would be on his ass later if Sasuke didn't hurry his behind off to his next meeting. "I'm not you wife!" Naruto gritted him teeth and shoved his hand against Sasuke's cheek. "I'm your lover. Be more romantic."
Sasuke cocked an eye and examined Naruto's clothing. He was wearing his normal orange outfit with some slight alterations here and there. His precious headpiece was removed and placed on the table. Sasuke tugged at the article of clothing around Naruto's waist, cocking his eye. "A lover that wears a frilly apron?"
The stealthy Sasuke leaned in for another attempted stolen kiss. Naruto intercepted and placed a finger on his lips. "You have a meeting today at lunch."
Sasuke grimaced, started thinking and stopped. He started to tug at his own clothing. "Screw it."
Naruto grabbed Sasuke's earlobe and blew in his ear. Sasuke blushed and made a move to remove his pants when Naruto whispered in a husky voice, "even one with Raikage?"
Sasuke moaned he looked through his head. "Tomorrow how about."
Naruto a step ahead cut him off. "You have a meeting to discuss project funding."
Sasuke bit his lip. He looked through his memory harder. "We continue this on---"
"You're booked until the end of the month with things you can't cancel." Naruto and Sasuke where now sitting on opposite ends of the love seat. Sasuke looked at Naruto, rubbing his temple. Naruto sighed and went into the kitchen to make Sasuke some tea.
Sasuke dropped his head and sighed. "I'm sorry."
Naruto slipped his fingers around the kettle handle concentrating his thoughts on pouring water, "I know."
Naruto suddenly paused and remembered something Sasuke could put off. It was his lucky day. "Oh yeah. And some villagers said they wanted to talk to you this afternoon, said it was important. No details." Naruto turned from his slowly boiling water and beamed, "you think you can put it off."
Sasuke's eyes widened. He turned away so he didn't have to face Naruto. "I can't. It's important. You know. village stuff."
Naruto's heart stopped.
Sasuke was the Hokage. He was always improving the quality of the village making everyone happy. The Hokage was always great. Everyone adored him. People aspired to be like him. Sasuke was worshipped in school and Naruto was wrong thinking that he could beat Sasuke out there. As if he could ever be as loved as Sasuke. Respected as Sasuke.
Being Sasuke's lover made it even harder. Now they hated him for being loved by Sasuke, he had to get his mind off of it.
"Oh. What's it about." Naruto inquired.
Sasuke stilled looked out the window, "I'm not obliged to say."
Naruto was hurt for a second. When had he and Sasuke grown apart? He never usually tried to pry into his life as others did. But he felt like.
Naruto flashed his teeth in a smile to reassure Sasuke that it was okay. "C'mon Sasuke, you have several minutes." Naruto bowed down to the Hokage in a respectful manner, something he only did away from the prying eyes of persecutors. Naruto jokingly batted his eyelashes, "please? For me?"
Sasuke turned around slowly and looked at Naruto cold and unfeeling.
Naruto felt a pang of raw emotion, as if Sasuke wasn't looking at him at all.
As if he was looking through Naruto. As he were looking at someone else. A killer, a rapist, a monster. Naruto stepped back knocking the kettle off the stove. Naruto panicked. He thought rapidly, choking on air. 'Sasuke. Not you too! Anyone. Anyone but you!'
Naruto edged closer to the stove trying to create as much distance as possible that he felt the heat, it was too hot. He was sweating. But that was because Naruto was afraid of turning his back on Sasuke. He reached him hand behind him to turn the heat off, blindly.
Sasuke spoke. It was like time freezing as a thousand kunai's hit Naruto's heart. "It's about you."
That's when Naruto burned himself.
{Memory End} -------------------
Kazekage and Hokage looked at their teacups, trying to avoid eye contact with each other. The meeting had broken out into a verbal fight in which Gaara started to insult Sasuke on his tactics and that Sasuke was a coward trying to erase the Sand Village. Sasuke returned the fact that Gaara was an incompetent leader and a killer, at that. Morimoto, Teguchi and Kankuro who sat behind Gaara decided they needed a break then and there to cool off.
Sasuke sipped the tea. 'Naruto used to make me tea like this all the time.' He clutched the cup in his hand afraid of loosing the memory. He looked up at a blissful Gaara. Gaara noticed Sasuke's watching him, but he feigned disinterest.
Gaara knew things about Sasuke. Things he was afraid to tell Naruto, things that he could use against Sasuke to keep him away. Make him realize that he was unworthy of the fox possessed boy.
"I heard a rumor that you---" Sasuke's eyes burned with anger and he reached into his pouch retrieving a throwing weapon. His hearing shut off but knew what Gaara was saying. Gaara was mocking him.
Once his hearing came back he settled his weapon in his lap. He breathed in and out, trying to retrieve his common sense.
Gaara looked up and smiled, "congratulations, Sasuke."
Lee and Neji stepped forward and held Sasuke back from Gaara he sat quietly, not noticing Sasuke's shouting and attempting to escape from their grips. Gaara looked through his paper, "wow. We could use the money for that one," Gaara thought aloud not even noticing his attempted murder.
"Shut up!" Sasuke pointed a kunai at Gaara's throat, his eyes glowing with anger. "Don't talk about them lightly like that! I'll kill you."
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"Natsume! Try this! On!" Sakura handed Natsume another dress. Naruto added it to the pile of growing shirts and dresses. Natsume sighed, Naruto knew he was going to be a woman. But this was overkill.
Temari smiled and nodded, "I agree, it'd look great on you. Natsume, Sakura, I'm going to go check out the lingerie store across the street. I'll be back."
"Okay, Temari." Even though one could not see his facial features Hatake Kakashi was grinning happily, for the day he was given permission to be Temari's fashion advisor and now Temari was dressed better than ever. He followed after Temari like a puppy, almost skipping to the lingerie store.
Natsume headed to that back room of the store where many of the stalls were white and unworn clothing and department hangers lay strewn on the ground. He chose the cleanest stall and kicked the unworn clothing out the stall door. Sakura followed her and stopped in front of the closing door. Natsume poked her head out the semi-closed door and smiled.
Sakura looked a bit trouble, Naruto knew she had something to say now. Naruto moaned internally. "Is it okay if I talked to you while you dressed?"
Natsume shrugged, "sure? Why not."
Sakura decided to start out by introducing Naruto. "You may not know this, but it was quite famous news around Leaf Village," Naruto tore off his ruined shirt with annoyance. He knew the story Sakura spoke of. They were still talking about him after three years, even though they acted as if he never existed. "When Sasuke first became our Hokage in Leaf Village, Sasuke was in love with a man named Naruto."
"I heard rumors about it." Natsume replied with the frustration of removing her pants.
"It was said that Naruto was the reincarnation of the nine tails fox." Sakura held the memory of their friendship in her mind. "Naruto was such a nice guy."
Sakura bit back her anger and repulsion, "Naruto was hated by the villagers, one day he disappeared for no reason. When he came back he was practically ripped apart." Sakura shuddered at the memory. She had heard some Genin had found him half-alive. "Something human or more like inhuman, since what they did to Naruto was cruel. Not even animals were that cruel."
"Three days later Naruto left and went missing. He's missing today." Sakura finished off the history for Natsume. 'She must not know her connection to Sasuke. I should tell her.'
"Aya, you look a lot like Naruto," Naruto held back his laughter. If she only knew, he looked at his dress. It was the only one her considered trying on. He hated it. He was re-buying the same shirt over so that was settled. He moved to unlock the door when Sakura spoke again. "Are you a Sasuke seeker?"
"Huh?" Naruto paused. How much had changed in three years? Sasuke Seekers?
"They're women who sometimes dress up like Naruto and try to win Sasuke's heart. They think that being Sasuke's wife will lead them to fame and fortune and they're somewhat right." Sakura knew this, as long as Sasuke had a Sasuke Seeker in his favour, she saw her old dream coming true.
"After the event people found out about Naruto and Sasuke and the women started to dress like him. They thought it was what he liked," she remembered trying on Naruto's clothing with Ino when they were cleaning out his house. How much they had laughed at Naruto's expense, "I thought it was really funny for a while. They had a fanclub for him and everything. I was a member for a short period of time."
"And then." Sakura had to tell Natsume-sensei. She knew she had to tell her, because she was not a Sasuke Seeker and that Sasuke deserved to get a descent woman like Aya. "Sasuke started to date them. But what he really wanted to do was rebuild his life and have a family."
Naruto closed his eyes. He didn't want to hear this.
"He ended up getting a friend of mine pregnant," Sakura paused as she heard the clatter of hangers fall to the ground.
'No.' Naruto knew that Sasuke would not stay with him forever. It was just.
"Are you okay Natsume?"
"It's just the shock." Naruto faked a laugh.
Sakura tried to act as if she weren't sad reminiscing about Sasuke's past. "He ended up doing the right thing and married her but. She was like the others, looking to get with Sasuke." Sakura remembered her friend, how happy she had been. Sakura had started going out with Lee shortly after. "But, she was different. For a short while Sasuke was really, really happy."
Natsume paused in her tracks, 'is that why Sasuke looking so tired out? Did she leave him or cheat on him?'
Sakura paused. It was hard for her, saying the next part. "She died giving birth to a son." Naruto leaned against the stall putting her shorts back on, 'so that's what happened..."
"Her name was Yamaka Ino, she was a friend of mine."
Naruto paused, Ino? Ino. He remembered her. At least it was someone he knew. Someone who was desperately in love with a man that no one dared to love and dared to love no one. Not even Naruto, who he tried to desperately. He understood her feelings and knew that Sasuke would not stay single forever. If it were someone else, he'd be upset. But. Ino was just like him, madly in love with Sasuke.
Naruto felt guilty. He never thought Ino would die though. Ino looked to be a strong ninja. 'But I guess it doesn't change the fact that she died.' Naruto gathered his unwanted clothing in a messy pile. 'Already someone has died for my choice. But. I guess that those few years Ino had with Sasuke would have been the happiest of her life."
Sakura continued on, raising her finger in the air recalling the image of Sasuke's son. She remembered the day he was born, looking a lot like a mini Sasuke. Born with a frown. "His son is really cute, his name is Daisuke. He was born almost a year ago. Sasuke didn't even know what to do with him when Daisuke was first born, but now Sasuke's a proud father." Naruto created an image of Sasuke trying to feed a crying child that refused milk. He couldn't believe it, if only he was there to see it. "He's all right now, he's with Ino's parents now that Sasuke's on a trip."
Sakura. Was trying to get him to like Sasuke. Naruto decided not to take that bait. He closed his eyes and spoke with clarity. "I love Gaara."
Sakura remembered the closeness he's seen with Gaara and Natsume, such closeness. "I know. I wanted to tell you if Sasuke falls for you, he's only looking for Naruto." Sakura knew in her heart it was better to tell Natsume the truth about Sasuke, Sasuke would be relentless in his pursuit. Because of all the women she bore not only the haze of Naruto, but she also had the kindness that Ino had shown him and motherly instinct that Daisuke required. Natsume opened the door, she had chosen to buy the angel wings shirt and wore it. Natsume tucked the ripped shirt under her arm "But. If you're really willing to give him a chance, please be good to Daisuke and please take care of Sasuke."
Natsume nodded to Sakura, making eye contact with the mature woman that he had not had the pleasure of knowing in depth. He walked to the cashier, his mind occupied with thoughts of Sasuke, Ino, and Sakura as children he had grown up with.
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[Oh no, SELF INSERT/]
Mukumuku: Hah hah. Made you believe Sasuke wasn't a father.
Audience Member: But didn't you say something like: "Sasuke? A father?" Like he wasn't a father? Unprove that!
Mukumuku: That was me talking! That was my author's voice slipping in, if it wasn't an author's voice it'd be in brackets. Bwah ha hah~!
Audience: Booooo! Stop lying to us and covering up your mistakes.
Mukumuku: That's not true, I planned this from the beginning! To lead you on!
Audience member: That's diabolically evil! To us and Sasuke!
(Sasuke is weeping in the background)
Mukumuku: Hey you. I didn't ask for your opinion. I in the fanfic writer. AM GOD!
(Background: On a banner, "Mary Sue Forever"]
Audience: (All whispering:) Let's kill her.
[/SELF INSERT END, bloody death by mass mauling.]
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Many women hid their disgust as they watched Kakashi look through the panty pile at the women's lingerie store. 'I don't know what's their problem is. I'm enjoying myself immensely and I'm helping Temari find a cute design.' Kakashi flipped through the multicolored panties with stride.
Iruka returning from the long line up at market breathed heavily, looking around to see if he could find Kakashi and the others. He looked up to see a sight that would take his breath away.
Kakashi in a woman's lingerie store, buying panties. "KAKASHI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE!?" Iruka gasped for his breath back, he felt like a mother with a two-year-old that had knocked over a display case of expensive china.
Kakashi lifted up a pair of pink panties, high so that Iruka could see. Kakashi didn't even have to remove a single weapon for the death move.
"This is your color---" Iruka's heart exploded, he dropped the bags of groceries he was holding. A lone apple slipped out of a bag and rolled. Kakashi finished his sentence with pride, "---Temari."
"Oh thanks! I'd look and feel great in this!" Temari looked at the color, thankful of Kakashi's good taste and style. Besides, every woman needed a gay friend. She passed Hinata on the way to the sales clerk. Hinata was pawing through the lacy cream colored bras, unable to pick up the one she wanted. She didn't want her Academy teacher to see the bras she was to wear, even though she knew which one she wanted to buy. "Iruka-sensei."
Iruka was watching her for a while. She looked embarrassed and he didn't understand why until he realized the reason. "I'm. I'm. I'm sorry. Hi-hi- Hinata!" He attempted to nudge Kakashi away who was already looking through the racks of bondage outfits. "Ca-Can-Can I talk to you for a second?"
"Me?" Hinata had picked up the bra and was trying her best to crumple and hide it from Iruka.
"N-n-no!" Iruka stammered.
"Me." Temari pointed to herself from across the store as the sales clerk was folding away her goods.
"NO!" Iruka shook his head frustrated. He looked at the apple that had fallen on the ground. It lay outside the store, slightly bruised. "Kaka- Kakashi!"
Kakashi was playing with a crop, testing it out on a scantily clad mannequin. Kakashi looked up from the mannequin with an evil glint in his eye, "what's wrong?"
Iruka shoved the groceries in Kakashi's arms, tossed the crop into the air which it landed in the panty pile. He hurried his lover out of the store. A safe distance away from where he threw the crop.
He picked up the apple and began to clean it on his clothing, looking around nervously. Kakashi blinked, wishing he still had the crop in his hands. Iruka manage to get out his jumbled words finally with a lot of effort. "IhavetotellsomeonethatnatsumeayisnarutoorI'mgoingtoexplode!"
"Natsume is Naruto, I had an inkling it was him." Kakashi scratched his head, "but if it wasn't and you were telling the truth I was going to ask her to join us."
Iruka paused. 'Join us.' It took a long time for Iruka to register what Kakashi was saying. "Join us?! Kaka. Kaka. Kakashi?!" Iruka was turning as bright red as the apple he clutched and was diverting his embarrassment into it.
"Hey, that means I'll just find another way to spice up our sex life," not that he was bored, Iruka needed a lot of coaxing to even get into bed. He needed to be in the mood and he had tried all the normal stuff he could to get Iruka in the mood. "Naruto's technique is pretty nice."
Iruka blushed more and fed up with nonsense, he looked Kakashi in the eye. "I'm not being a woman," Iruka said straight out, taking back the groceries into his arms.
Kakashi wandered back into the store much to Iruka's dismay and reached onto the self pulling a feminine piece of lingerie and holding it to his body.
"How would I look in this?" Kakashi teased.
Iruka's heart exploded for the second time in that day.
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Author's Note:
Oww.. My stomache. Anywho! Poor Ino died. I had to sacrifice someone. And I though, why not Ino? You win some. You lose some. Actually I did plan it out this way, somewhat, but I screwed up some writing. I then thought. Dagnabit! Leave it in.
If I have some spelling errors forgive my soul so it may pass onto heaven.
Half wrote chapter five, will have Gaara, Sasuke and Naruto in the bathroom together.
IN THE NUDE!
Atomstar, can you see my spelling mistakes when you re-read my fanfic. I do. (Tears.) taikoubou42, you have the same wish as many. Hazar! (Reads list:) Vampire Goddess Jekyll (may your dreams come true!), Lady Dragon, Silver reviewed thrice! And Pantantlantic, um.. Dan Inverse. I shall grant it now! .
There.
It's done.
WuffieLuver, I've made it harder. Sasuke's got issues and Gaara's. He's cool. Athravan, I hope this chapter suits you. I promise you more angst and less Mary-sueism!
M-i, I'm joking! He does!
Sun. Don't worry. There's going be. (trails off)
SW, sorry for all the past revealing killing the humor. Added Kakashi spice. Kakashi wants a more interesting love life. (nods)
Cheryl-san, Naruto's "special" Genins are essential herbal essences for this fanfic! They're parallels of his old genin team. Jin=Sasuke Jacques=Naruto Yuri=God knows who! Lee will come soon! He will sweep Sakura away to their love room!
Nora D, I'm glad you're okay with Jacques. Whew!
Nemi, I though Lee would be twice as ugly and ten times as charming to make up.
Kakashi wants to utilize it for a better sex life. See, review and your dreams come true. Go thank Shadow of Arashi for that one.
Kira, you had me gasping for a second. Forgive my OOC. They're older and angsty. Neko Nicole. I have a chapter for you. I promise you more. N-oooo! Tsuki-tsu-ten-tsu-tsu--- aw, too long.
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Next time on a very special A Sexy Jutsu
We're previewing ahead to god knows what chapter.
Naruto finally takes his long awaited bath.
Naruto. Don't bathe in the Kage's special bathroom. Kages bathe there. That means Sasuke and Gaara. And is there any room for Sasuke x Gaara/Gaara x Sasuke in an already Sasuke x Naruto, Gaara x Naruto fanfic. Gaara. Your mascara scares me. Where are you eyebrows?
Naruto. Don't invite horny people into your house if you intend to sleep tonight. Kakashi looks good in lingerie. Can Iruka resist having sex in his pupil's house? Apparently not. But Mukmuku can't write sex scenes so it's going to be okay.
Naruto, don't accept invitations you can accept. Naruto, don't date two people at once.
Naruto. Naruto? Naruto. Noooooooooo!!!
Mukumuku needs to get chapter 5 and 6 and possibly 7 uploaded on the same day. For some drastic changes and some super love. Be there. Or be square.
[Review or Naruto ends up with Orochimaru. And if you want that. Review some more.]