One day, Boston Jane woke up. She was only moments from death, but, unaware of this, all Jane could think about was her boyfriend and archenemy.
As she was thinking about these two people, Sally, who just happened to be Jane's archenemy and had come all the way from Philadelphia for unknown reasons, came up behind Boston Jane and said, "Jane we've got to talk."
"Why?" asked Jane.
"Did you know that the only reason I came all the way out here was because I've been in love with you for my whole life. Please say you return my affections," said Sally Biddle.
Jane, who was flabbergasted, replied, "I don't love you, I love Jehu. He's been everything to me since I came here."
"What do you mean?" asked Sally, "You don't love me? You must DIE!" And Sally killed her.
She deserved it.