AN: Okay, the real author's note. Lemel and I wrote this whole story in like five days. It does have a plot! We own pretty much all of
the characters with the following minor exceptions - the original concept of Tawny was created by Kara, and Lexy just improved
him. Thanks to Kara. Krit and Syl technically belong to James Cameron, the Sex Crazed idea belongs to Jane the Frog on the Wall, and
the Evil idea was originally Pooh_Bah's. Other than that, Sexcrazed_Krit, Tawny, all the animal muses and Evil_Syl belong to Lexy. Jacey is an actual person, as
is Jello. Lemel and I are actual real people, which is actually scary.

No offence to any one we insult (except Nicki Webster, Pokemon etc).

Blame Lexy for the lack-of-updates cause... she updates it. Reviews = Chocolate-y and Coke-y goodness!

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Lemel glanced at her watch. "I'd better be going, Jellyboy. Lexy's pissed as it is, without me being stupidly late."

Jello laughed. "As if 3am isn't stupidly late?"

"No, 3am is stupidly early," replied Lemel.

"Ah, I see." Jello nodded sagely.

Lemel stood, and adjusted her robes. "Thanks, Jello. Though, sorry for depleting your chocolate supply again.

Jello laughed as he stood and accepted a hug from Lemel. "Never mind."

Lexy opened 'Lemel's Spells' – one of Lemel's multiple spell books. Jelly knees? Ooh… a spell to turn one into a canary! Perfect! That would be one that Lexy would have to learn in the immediate future.

"Lexy?" Tawny, one of Lexy's fic writing Muses, appeared.

"I'm not speaking to you." Lexy said. "Now P.O.Q or I'll turn you into a canary."

"The Donutians have started a war – the egg shelf doesn't agree with the environmental development of the vegetable drawer."

Lexy sighed.

"And Kermit will be here in 2.95 minutes," Tawny nodded and began to go back to the Muse Room with Krit and Syl.

"Lemel!"

Lemel materialized in the living room, looking quite pleased with herself. "Yo, Lexy. How's things?"

Lexy glared at her. "Your Donut People are fighting a war. Go fix it."

Lemel sighed tolerantly. "Yeah, yeah etc." She went into the kitchen, on the way passing by the Muse Room, and just to irritate Lexy, she winked at Tawny, waving her fingers. Tawny just looked confused but that wasn't what Lexy was focused on.

"AND LEAVE TAWNY ALONE!" Lexy yelled. Lemel turned around to see Lexy began yelling at Tawny. "First Jacey, now Lemel! Can you not just be a good Muse?!"

Lemel sniggered to herself. The damage she had done was priceless. So she went to the fridge. "Why are you warring?"
"We want Herman! We want Herman!" Thousands of tiny voices squeaked in a chant.

A hovercraft smacked Lemel's skull. "Ow," she said. "Fine. You want Herman?" Reaching into her pocket, she withdrew the tiny blue man. "Here he is. And get out of sight – Kermit will be here any time now."

"OH MY GOD!" came a voice. Lexy again. "Lemel! Help me!"

Lexy was standing in the HALL ROOM, completely white. And next to her was… Lemel tried to hard not to laugh. Next to her was an enormous canary, wearing a tutu and a beanie.

"What h-happened?" Lemel was laughing hysterically.

"I lost my t-temper with Tawny," Lexy stuttered tearfully.

Lemel snickered. "Lost your temper? Why?"

"LEMEL! IT'S NOT FUNNY!" Lexy shrieked.

"Fine." Lemel waved her hand dismissively, and Tawny was returned to his former self. "And he didn't do anything, anyway."

"WHAT?!" Lexy cried. "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

Lemel shrugged. "I'm just saying…"

"WHAT ARE YOU JUST SAYING?" Lexy yelled.

Lemel wanted to inflict pain on Lexy as a glazed look came over Lexy's face.

"Not the bleach, Lexy." Lemel pleaded.

Lexy snapped her fingers and a big yellow and pink rubber chicken appeared in her hand. "What are you just saying? What did you do to my boyfr… Muse?" Lexy blushed a little and waved the chicken in Lemel's face.

"I didn't do anything to HIM," Lemel pushed the chicken away. "I just wrote that stupid letter to piss you off, cause I was mad about the tutu thing. That's all," she grinned. "So he's your boyfriend? What about that thing with Jacey?"

Lexy blushed and put her hands on her hips, gripping the neck of her rubber bird. "You WROTE that letter? Why? Why? Why? The tutu thing was marginally funny, like the Turtle Wax. Writing the letter was EVILNESS. And what I do with my Muses… boyfriend is such a specific word." Lexy stuck the bird in her robes. "Tawny had a foursome with Jacey! I mean, how could she? But that was after she died and the Trey-Krit-and-me triangle at the funeral… Can you fix him?" Lexy pleaded.

Lemel scowled. "The tutu thing was NOT funny at all. And take another look at your precious 'Muse' – he should be all better now." She turned and headed back towards the kitchen. "I'm going to go and be Moon Goddess, and help my Donutians sort out their war."

"Suit yourself," Lexy retorted and turned to Tawny who was completely shedding his yellow feathers, tutu and beanie in a heap. "I'm sorry, Tawny," Lexy said in a torrent of tears. "I gotta go fix the donut war now." With a kiss to Tawny's cheek, she bounced downstairs. "Lemel, have you resolved the war…" Ding-Dong. "Because Kermit is here! And maybe we could redecorate our bedrooms?" Lexy saw Kermit trying to see through the window. "Gotta go." As she ascended back up the stairs, she scooped up a purple fuzzy chicken that was napping on the stairs.

Half an hour later, Lemel found herself in the living room, discussing the taste of flies – well, listening to the frogman Kermit, describe the taste of flies. Sighing, she put up with it – Kermit paid their rent, after all.

And damn Lexy was upstairs, lucky bum, with three muses, and the entire menagerie. She had decided to throw a wild party in the Party Room – a costume party! She had her muses, the pets, Winnie the Pooh and Various People – and had sent a message to Jello to invite him to join them. Lexy was dressed up as a fairy and handing out tiny Rhubarb Surprise Cakes – with Woobily Worms™ in the middle. Woobily Worms™ were made of goo and were very…gooey. And there was lots of cake!

Suddenly, Lemel's cellphone rang. Grateful for the interruption, she excused herself and left the room. "Yel-low?"

"Lemel?" It was none other than the Jello-man.

"Hey, Jello!" Lemel smiled, feeling better already. "I thought you were going to Lexy's party?"

"Are you going?" Jello asked hopefully.

"Doubt it." Lemel replied dully. "Kermit the Frogman stopped by, and Lexy's abandoned me. Even after I cured Tawny, she's abandoned me!"

"Cured Tawny?" Jello asked curiously.

"Yeah. Cause of my letter, she lost her temper, and," Lemel smirked, "Turned him into a giant, beanie-and-tutu-wearing canary."

Jello laughed. "Cool. Hey, I'll tell you what. Give me Kermit's number, I'll call him, give some excuse, and we'll crash Lexy's little 'party' and cause some chaos."

Lemel grinned. "Jello, you're a legend!"

"I know."

Lemel waited 2 minutes… 15 minutes… 20 minutes for Jello's phone call, while Kermit chatted on about the absolutely fascinating lifecycle of mealworms. Finally, when Lemel felt like chewing her arm off and beating Kermit with it, Kermit's cellphone rang. He snatched it up instantly and turned his back on Lemel. "Hello? Yes. Yes. Siberia? Yes. No. Possibly. That's a very personal question. Um, no, Petrol. Yes and coddled eggs. Well, that's wrong. I feel robbed. Constipated? Well…I'll be there very soon, I'll leave now."

Kermit snapped his phone shut. Lemel crossed her fingers. "An…emergency has cropped up. I have to leave now and will be back sometime late next week. I'll call when I get home."

"I hope the emergency isn't too…y'know, concerning," Lemel smiled politely. "We'll see you soon, okay?"

"Yes, and it was very pleasant to see you," Kermit said. "Though, I didn't see that nice lamb again."

Lemel coughed. "I'll make sure she's around next time you drop in. Oh, and you should talk to Lexy – what you had with Lickety-Split has always been a dream of hers."

Kermit's eyes widened (if that's possible…) "Really?"

"Yeah." Lemel managed to look fairly innocent. "Anyway, I don't want to keep you, so…"

"Yes, yes, I really must be going." Kermit left.

A few minutes later, Jello appeared.

"Hey, Lemel," he smiled as he accepted a hug.

"Hey, Jello. Thanks. I guess I owe you one."

"You owe me several. But hey, who's counting?" Jello grinned, then hooked his arm through Lemel's. "Well, I believe we have a party to 'crash'?"

Lemel grinned. "Indeed we do, Jello my man."

Lexy stared around at her party with A Look of General Frustration. The chickens were all puffed up from cake. Tawny was in a corner, in a ball, listening to S Club 7 as loud as possible after some insult from one of Lexy's other Muses, Sex-Crazed Krit. Evil Syl (the 3rd Muse) was miming a stripper and, Lexy realized with horror, the Christmas M&M's had run out! And then, the door swung open…

…Lemel practically waltzed into the room, followed by an abnormally over-cheerful Jello.

"Yo, Lex, Kermit's gone thanks to some manipulatory genius on Jello's behalf, but he wants to see you and Lickety-Split upon his return. And no, we don't have anything planned…" Lemel turned to grin at Jello, "Lastly, just so you know, there's a purple fuzzy chicken playing in the oven, and…"

"NO!" Lexy screamed, "MY BABY!!!" she raced from the room. As soon as she was out of sight, Lemel closed the door.

"Jello, music. Tawny, decorations. Krit, 'entertainment'. Syl… keep doing that for Jello's benefit." Lemel grinned and rubbed her hands together. "What with the Superglue on the oven door, Lexy should be gone for quite a while…"

** Two and a Half Hours Later **
Lexy came back into the room, clutching her slightly burned chicken close. "Sorry I took so long, everyone…" Her voice trailed off as she froze in horror.

Eminem was playing loudly and there were huge puddles of Lemel's Concoction on the floor. The multicolored decorations had been traded for black and silver ones. All of the animals she had left in the Party Room were completely smashed. Evil Syl and Sex-Crazed Krit were gone and suddenly, Lexy didn't want to know where they were; Sex Crazed Krit had to get his name from somewhere.

Lexy patted her slightly singed Purple Fuzzy Chicken and placed him down. Lemel, Jello and Tawny were playing…strip go fish?!

"Lemel, explain."

Lemel looked up with eyes slightly glazed by a mix of her concoction and Force-knows-what. "Yo, Lex," she said, voice more than slightly slurred. "Y'know, Syl and Krit are…"

Lexy cut her off. "I don't want to know." She scowled at the decorations for a moment longer, then tried again. "What the hell have you done to my party?!"

Lemel smiled sloppily. "Well, I thought it was kinda obvious…" Standing unsteadily, she somehow made it over to Lexy and threw her arms around Lexy's shoulders – despite the fact that she was only wearing her undergarments and a pair of board shorts – that looked like Jello's! And Jello was only wearing a Siith robe that looked suspiciously like Lemel's.

"See, Lex, the music you have bites," Lemel slurred. "Eminem rocks…uh…someone else's socks anywho," she grinned. "I've got no idea what happened to my socks."

"Actually, at this point," Lexy sighed. "I don't want to know where your socks are either, Lemel." Snapping her fingers, Lexy changed from her sparkly fairy costume to a very funky red top and black jeans.

"Y'know, Lexy," Lemel grinned wobbily. "I lurve you. You're my best pal-y. Putting up with all my evil jokes and me putting your ad-or-able chooken in the oven….I can just be so mean!" Lemel flung her arms around Lexy's neck.

Lexy froze, more than a little scared. Luckily, Jello wasn't quite as drunk and he somehow managed to walk over.

"C'mon Lemel," he slurred. "It's your turn, y'know."

"Oh right," Lemel smiled. "What're we playin' again?"

Jello shrugged. "Who knows? The rules vanished a few centuries ago, and now we're just kinda laughing and losing socks and shirts and…." He was cut off as Lemel stumbled and he had to catch her. This was made even weirder by the fact that they hadn't started moving yet.

"Damn gravity," Lemel muttered as Jello led her back over to the 'card-game'.

"Blaming your mistakes on 'large animate objects' now, Lemel?" Lexy asked, beginning to herd her plump chickens to the Bed Place of Lexy's Purple Fuzzy Chickens Room because it was way too late for them to be eating Lemel's pancakes and custard. As Lexy tucked all of them in, she heard a thump and crash from Krit's Room of Xtreme Busy-Ness™ (cough, cough). 'Ewww,' Lexy thought and made her way back to the Party Room. And almost died. Somehow, in the space of fifteen minutes, Jello had exchanged Lemel's robe for a sock. Tawny was passed out drunk on the floor ('Darn,' Lexy thought, 'No fun for me tonight.') And…obviously Lemel had been taking stripping lessons from Syl…

Lemel was now wearing a sarong as a mini-dress, and she had somehow made it over to Lexy, but half slumped against the wall.

"Hey, Lexy," she grinned, though her voice was barely understandable, "How are your little…fuzzy thingies?" Before Lexy could answer, Lemel kept talking. "What do you think've Jellybone's outfit-sock-thingy?"

"I think I need a therapist, Lem," Lexy said patiently. "You are very drunk – plastered, in fact. Past plastered. You should be dead from alcohol poisoning; if you were a norm."

"'Member the time you were drunk and Krit was drunk and even Syl was drunk and you all played naked Twister?" Lemel said. "Those were good times."

"How do you know about that?" Lexy exclaimed, blushing.

"Lil birdie told me," Lemel grinned cheesily. "A little purple fuzzy thing, in fact."

Lexy just stared.

"Hey, Lemel!" Jello's more-than-somewhat-slurred voice joined the conversation. "Are ya interested in playin' some poker?"

"Poker?" Lemel's face showed confusion. "What're the crazy rules of that crazy game?"

Jello shrugged, sort of. "Who knows? Who cares? Who has more LC?"

Lemel grinned. "LC? Good idea!" After several tries, she snapped her fingers and a large barrel of LC appeared.

Lexy stared at Lemel and Jello as they started to drink – or slurp and spill – huge glasses of LC. "What do you think you are doing?" Lexy cried out.

Jello looked up. "Getting even more sloshed, 'Exy."

"Are you aware you are wearing nothing but a pink and purple striped sock?" Lexy pointed out. Then there was the sound of something smashing, something sloppy hitting the floor and a frantic 'Maaaah!'.

"Wonderful!" Lexy threw up her hands. "Why must the shrimp tease Lickety-Split so much?" She turned to leave. "Oh, and Lemel, Jello?" DO NOT drink anymore alcohol. Or lose anymore clothes, okay?"

"Yes, Lexy," both said angelically.

Lexy stared at them for a moment longer, then went to save her lamb. As soon as she'd gone, Lemel continued drinking – despite the fact she had somehow managed to drape her self rather uncomfortably over the table. Jello was lying on his back, drinking straight from the barrel, using the little tap thingy.

Lemel glanced blearily at Jello. "What're you doin', Jelly?"

Jello stopped drinking, but failed to turn off the tap, so LC rained down on him.

"Lemel?"

"Yeah?"

"What're you doin'?"

Lemel frowned. "Jelly, what're you doin'?"

Jello began laughing. "What're you doin'?"

Lemel laughed as well. "What're you doin'?"

Lexy reappeared. "LEMEL! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Lemel and Jello glanced at each other and burst into laughter – drunken, scary laughter but laughter none-the-less.

"Right," Lexy crossed her hands. "It's 8 a.m. I think it's time for…you both to go to bed. Dontcha think?"

"Nope," Lemel grinned.

"Nah," Jello grinned and turned back to drinking LC.

"Well," Lexy said. "I do. My muse boyfriend dude is plastered thanks to you. Syl and Krit are… 'at the fair.' And I serve breakfast in an hour. So, you can either sleep here or in Lemel's Room. It's up to you."

"Here."

"Hereamundo!"

Lexy stared at them. "Okay, usually when people are drunk – especially if they're friends as close as you seem to be, they end up doing something similar to…what Syl and Krit are doing. Why don't you?"

Lemel looked at Jello, who stared back. The, Lemel looked at Lexy, and said seriously, "Jello, a guy? I thought he was a Grand Admiral."

Jello hit her. "Shut up, Lemel."

Lemel shrugged, causing herself to overbalance and fall from the table. When she recovered, she said, "Nah, Jello's my friend. And besides, I already did that with Tawny and…"

"WHAT?" Lexy yelped. "Y-You and T-Tawny?" In a fit of temper, she snapped her fingers and they all ended up covered in aloe vera – which everyone knows has the consistency of clear, gooey snot. "Him and Jacey, you and him…WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?"

Lemel considered. "D'ya want me t'answer than ques…ques…thingy?"

Lexy covered her face with her hands and began to cry. Lemel crawled over and gave her an aloe-vera hug.

"If it makes ya feel better, when he was really, really plastered, he kept calling me Jacey." Lexy's crying got louder. Lemel continued, "Then, when he was waaay past plastered, he kept calling me Syl."

Lexy's crying became full out wailing.

"Then, when he was waaay past waaay past plastered, he kept calling me Lexy."

Lexy shut up. "He did?" she sniffled.

"Yeah." Then Lemel frowned. "Then he passed out and it wasn't fun anymore."

"Really?" Lexy wiped her face. "Wow, what was Jello doing while you did…Tawny!" And the cries started again.

Lemel frowned. "I don't know. I think he was dancin' or somethin'." She looked at Jello. "What WERE you doing, Jelly-Boy?"

Jello shrugged. "Don't 'member."

Then Lemel's eyes lit up. "I 'member. Threesome, it was. Fun."

"WHAT?!" Lexy screeched . "WHAT! WHY ME?" She snapped her fingers again in temper and everyone was suddenly dressed in yellow and red cheerleading outfits - complete with pompoms strapped to their hands. She (being Lexy) marched over the Tawny's prostate form (LC was not good for him) and kicked him. "How. Could. You. You. Unimaginable. @!*?\\$!!"

Both Lemel and Jello looked up at the torrent of naughty words that came from Lexy's mouth.

"Oooh," Lemel said. "I don't think Lexy's very happy."

Tawny groaned, rolled over, and fell back into unconsciousness.

Lemel glanced down at her clothes. "Lexy," she moaned. "Stop doing that. It hurts my brain."

"WHAT THE @*!# do you expect me to do, LEMEL?" Lexy screeched. "YOU'VE COMPLETELY RUINED MY PARTY!"

Lemel grinned lopsidedly. "I beg to differ. I made it better."

"NO YOU DIDN'T, YOU…YOU…THERE AREN'T ANY WORDS BAD ENOUGH TO DESCRIBE YOU!"

Lemel considered this. "I'm sure there are," she slurred. "But maybe they is in another language."

"I'll say," Lexy muttered. "This is very bad. I feel the need for Orange Juice, okay? I'll be in the kitchen, with all 32 of my Purple Fuzzy ChickensÓ." And with that, Lexy left.

"Y'know, Jelly," Lemel said thoughtfully. "Who was it I sent to spike the Orange Juice?"

Jello attempted to concentrate. "Was it me?"

"Who knows?" Lemel shrugged. "LC?"

"All gone," Jello said sadly. "Can you make more?"

Lemel attempted to snap her fingers, but was unsuccessful. "How do you snap your fingers again?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Reviews make us more Evil - or Less Evil, depending on what you prefer. And any demands to update go to me (Lexy) cause ... yeah, I have to type it up and all... REVIEW LIKE THE FIENDS YOU ARE! Muahahahaha!