AN: Yes, Lexy raided her computer for an update! The usual disclaimers apply.

AN2: Unimpressed: Loosen up, dude! This is just a fun piece of writing! Lemel and I are both veteran fic writers, and you were the only one who doesn't seem to like it.

And we're evil. We do evil stuff. Muahahaha. Review, damnit.

*~*~*TWO HOURS LATER*~*~*

Lemel half-stumbled into the kitchen into the kitchen, for some Coke. Lexy sat at the kitchen table.

"Ahh, so you've emerged. Incredible. Cause I missed you, Lem. Drunk isn't 'you', ya know?" Lexy grinned. "Okay, I'm going to have a nice big bubble bath, okay?"

"Yuppers," Lemel said, rooting around the fridge, trying not to disturb any of the donutarians' constructions.

And Lexy skipped off, slightly tipsy from the Spiked Orange Juice. Lemel finally emerged with her Coke and noticed all 32 Purple Fuzzy Chickens were perched near Lexy's breakfast plate, and one was lapping at The Orange Juice That Was Spiked.

Lemel's face broke into an evil grin… and she hit the switch to the ceiling fan 'on'.

*~*~*HALF AN HOUR LATER*~*~*
Lexy came back down, done up in her purple and white robes, singing cheerfully.

"Lemel, why are all 32 of my Purple Fuzzy Chickens sitting on the stove top?" Lexy said cheerily.

"Only 31," Lemel replied, equally cheery. "One of them took a sip of your 'Orange Juice' and flew into the fan."

"WHAT?!?"

Lemel shrugged. "You heard what I said."

"WHAT?!?"

"What is such a silly word, don't you think?" Lemel mused. "Do we have any Panadol, Panadeine, Herron or other pain relieving medication?"

Lexy gaped at her. "IT FLEW INTO THE FAN?"

Lemel winced. "Not so loud. Where's Jello?"

"Lying on the Party Room floor, wearing a cheerleading uniform, talking about umbrellas with a poster of Leonardo DiCaprio." Lexy fussed about the nest of her Chickens. "What happened to my Chicken that hit the fan?"

"Uhh…" Lemel winced. "I think I'll go revive Jello." She stood and headed for the door."

"I'll put a Wibbily Wobbily Spell on him," Lexy said crankily. "Lemel, why are there masses of Purple Fuzzy Chicken Feathers in the garbage?"

"You CAN'T spell him!" Lemel cried. "He's already going to be kinda upset about the threesome and all, and if he's talking about umbrellas, then his hangover's bad…"

"Lemel, why are there masses of Purple Fuzzy Chicken Feathers in the garbage?"

Lemel sighed. "There's more than that, it's just that the feathers are on top." She held up a hand as Lexy turned a shade darker than the chickens. "Hey, I didn't put it there. That's where it landed."

"I-Is she dead?" Lexy murmured tearfully.

Lemel hesitated. "Good question. Why don't you check, I'll go fix up Jello, and if it…she's dead, I'll get you another one." Her humongous hangover putting her in an unusually sensitive mood, Lemel put her hand on Lexy's shoulder. "I didn't mean to hurt her, it was the LC." Lemel hid a smile - usually she did want to hurt then, to make Lexy shriek - but this was a time she had an excuse.

Lexy nodded, and sniffled. "Can y-you do me a favour, Lemel?"

"Sure," Lemel said. "What?"

"Kick Tawny when he wakes up - hard," Lexy sniffled. "Fickle bastard. Oh, and can you see if Krit's Room of Xtreme Busy-Ness is still, um, being extremely busy? Walking in on him can be so ugly."

Lemel nodded and vanished up the stairs. Lexy turned to her fallen baby.

"LEMEL!" Lexy screamed thirty seconds later.

Thirty seconds after that, Lemel stumbled into the kitchen with a now at least partially dressed Jello - he was wearing his shorts again.

"What is it, Lex?" Lemel draped Jello over the table, and the Grand Admiral proceeded to fall asleep again.

"MY BABY!" Lexy wailed. "MY POOR LITTLE BABY!"

Lemel stared at her, arms folded. "That tells me nothing. Calm down, stop yelling, tell me what's wrong, except wait until I've take some kind of pain-relieving medication before you start explains anything."

"The fan…hit…oh…" Lexy gasped, as the colour drained from her face. And then, as Lemel gazed at the ball of fuzz in Lexy's hands…

Jello's snoring broke the silence. Lexy stared wide-eyed at Jello for a second, and the colour came back to her face. "W-When my poor bird hit the fan, her wings got sliced off!" And with that, Lexy clutched the unconscious partially-dead bird to her chest and began to cry hysterically.

"If it helps, the bird was so drunk, it probably didn't feel any pain," Lemel pointed out. Lexy's cries stopped mid-sniff.

"And WHOSE fault was it that there was LC in my OJ anyway?" Lexy hissed, furious.

Lemel considered. "Well, Jello and I were so very drunk…" At the sight of Lexy's fury, Lemel got to the point. "My idea, Jello did it. I turned on the fan. But I told you it was the LC…"

But the damage was done. Lexy snapped her fingers and Lemel was all of a sudden wearing a giant bunny costume and a bright, fluoro green face - which didn't fade for four hours. And Jello? He got a pink and gold tail for his trouble, and an orange fuzzy nose, Then Lexy went upstairs to try and help her 'precious '.

Jello woke up and groaned. "Lemel?"

Lemel turned to look at him, suddenly not so cheerful anymore. "Yeah?"

"I don't feel so good."

"Yeah, I know. You're hung over pretty bad, Jello." Lemel snapped her fingers and got rid of the bunny costume - unfortunately she needed to wait a few more minutes before her goddess magic would work on the face - and the tail and nose on Jello.

"C'mon. We have some Coke, and nice softy fluffy rooms Lexy doesn't know about." Lemel retrieved the Coke, and helped Jello stagger towards the Hangover Recovery Rooms.

Meanwhile Lexy had taken her injured Purple Fuzzy Chicken to The Room Full of Nurses, Doctors and Other Healing Things and left her with a Nice Nurse Person. And went to where Tawny hung out - The Room of Tawny-ness.

Barging in, she spied him lying on his (coughKingsizecough) bed, reading a men's magazine. In three steps, Lexy ripped the magazine from Tawny's grip.

"What? Syl, Jacey AND Lemel? WHY?"

Tawny shrugged. "I like variety?"

"VARIETY?" Lexy shrieked. "Then buy a box of selection chocolates! You don't go around *doing* stuff like that with people I know! And the threesome with Lemel and Jello?! You weren't interested when I suggest a threesome between you, me and Sexcrazed Krit!"

Tawny sat up. "Lex, Sexcrazed Krit makes *everyone* feel inadequate, so that's not going to happen *ever*."

Lexy sat heavily on the bed, looking suddenly very depressed. "Aren't I good enough for you?" she asked plaintively.

Tawny hesitated - and was saved from a reply when a now-fully-recovered-and-normal-looking-Lemel threw open the door and waltzed in.

"Hey Tawny-baby. Yo Lex." Then, she paused. "I interrupted something, didn't I?"

"HELL YES!" Lexy yelled. "Can't you and Jello go sabotage all of Kermit's underwear - again - or something! I'm trying to convince my muse-boyfriend-dude-like person to have a threesome with me and Krit!"

Lemel held up her hands. "Whoa, Lex, that ain't never gonna happen, you know that. I mean, Krit is great one on one…" Lemel's voice faltered as Lexy's fury doubled, "But no guy wants to be compared to him on the spot like that."

"On the spot?" Lexy raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, you know that I mean, Lex," Lemel waved her hand dismissively. "Point is, no guys want threesomes that involve Krit. It makes them feel inadequate."

"But when TAWNY IS HAVING THREESOMES with people other than me - his Maaster and girlfriend - I FEEL INADEQUATE AND HOPELESS and I FEEL LIKE FLYING INTO A FAN!" Lexy wailed in one breath, giving Tawny the Evil Eye.

"I suddenly feel this conversation is none of my business," Lemel began to step backwards out of the room. "Jello and I'll just go and um… start an illegal pig farm, okay? Bye."

"GET BACK IN HERE, LEMELEMIE!" Lexy yelled. Lemel froze - she'd never seen Lexy quite this furious before.

"HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!" Lexy wailed. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FRIEND!"

Lemel hesitated. "I am your friend, Lex." She winced. "Well, maybe its past-tense now. And technically, I did stuff to Tawny - or him to me - or whatever, so technically…"

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR SILLY TECHNICALITY EXCUSES!" Lexy yelled.

"B-But, Lex, babe, I was so completely plastered…" Tawny said.

"Do you want to be with m-me or would you rather be with t-that … TRAITOR?!" Lexy shrieked. Lemel looked at Lexy curiously - was she turning purple again?

"L-Lex, it was only a one time thing," Tawny pleaded. Lexy glared at him with disbelief.

"ONE TIME?? TRY THREE! YES, I KNOW ABOUT SYL!" Lexy thundered, and with that, she vanished and Lemel and Tawny were left, staring at each other.

Lemel folded her arms and scowled. "She didn't have to call me a traitor." Then she smiled. "Good thing she doesn't know about the other times then, eh?" With that, she disappeared as well, it was quite likely Jello would need protection from Lexy.

And Lemel was correct, in fact; Lexy had gone after Jello next. With a Rusty Spoon™. "L-Lexy, what have I-I done?" Jello asked uneasily.

"Tawny, you and Lemel?" Lexy spat. "Jog your memory?"

"Um, no?" Jello said hopefully. And found himself strapped to a table. "Which version of the Rusty Spoon Punishment™ are you going to perform?" he asked anxiously.

"Traditional digging of the heart," Lexy said venomously. "Maybe some other vital organs."

Lemel appeared. "No, you are not, Lexy," she said firmly. "Jello was drunk, and he didn't know that Tawny was your boyfriend. We were all drunk so, furious as you may be, by The Rules, you aren't allowed to give either me or Jello any kind of Punishment, except yelling and verbal abuse." Walking over, Lemel crossed the room in two strides, grabbed the spoon (which isn't rusty yet, as it requires a spell to achieve the correct rust level) snapped it in half with her bare hands, and ate it.

Lexy glared at Lemel, who swallowed the spoon halves. "Mmm, pointy."

Lexy continued glaring. Lemel released Jello and began brushing him off.

"That's it!" Lexy yelped. "I'm moving out! Alone!" And with that, she vanished.

Lemel straightened and turned to look at the empty air where Lexy had been standing. "Alone? What about her chickens, shrimp, lamb, and other pets and objects? What about Tawny, Krit and Syl? She paused, then added softly, "What about me? I know I'm mean sometimes, but…"

Lexy was sitting on her bed which was an actual hammock, listening to Music That Was Angry. And reading books. And not thinking about hat she said. 'Leave my shrimp, my chickens, my lamb, goat, ferret, Syl, Krit and Tawny? And Lemel? We've lived together since I became a Siith! Why did she have to go and get to have all the threesomes?"

*~*~*~*~*

Ohhhh, cliff hanger! Woohoo! We have a plot, ladies and gentlemen! Review like the fiends you are!