WARNING: A SEMI-LEMON SCENE HERE. PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK.
KYTE, I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING RIGHT NOW. STOP IT.
I fell in love with her? How could that have happened? It can't be!
Hatori's mind was still in a turmoil after he and Shigure parted ways that morning in the coffee shop. He was still fighting with himself when he arrived home, expecting to see Tohru's welcoming face again.
But to his surprise, there was no Honda Tohru waiting for him in the living room. He tried looking for her in the kitchen, in the bedroom, in the dining room, in his clinic…but to no avail.
He instinctively reached for his car keys.
Tohru was walking back home, eyes on the pavement. She still couldn't comprehend how the web of events was revealed to her. She was still in the state of shock.
Hatori-sensei was never my husband. Never.
How could he do this to me? Lie so blatantly about something that he must have known all along.
Honks of cars snapped her out of her trance.
One head popped out from one of the car windows. "Are you insane? If you want to kill yourself, don't make me your killer, ok? I have a wife waiting for me!"
The words barely entered her mind with comprehension. Except for the word wife.
She collapsed in the middle of the road, crying all over again.
A policeman made his way towards her. "Miss, you have to leave this place. You are causing traffic here."
She still couldn't summon the strength to reply. She was too tired…to exhausted…
"Officer, I can take care of this," bellowed the familiar authoritarian voice.
The next thing she knew, she was being carried by a pair of strong arms, as if she was just a rag doll.
"You idiot! What were you doing in the middle of the road? Do you really want to make it to the front page of the news when a hundred-strong Tokyo traffic runs over you like a stampede?"
Her blurred vision recognized the familiar angry face of Sohma Hatori. She felt that she must hate him, but she was too tired even to hate…
"Look at you! You are so filthy!" Hatori yelled at the silent girl. "How did you get there anyway?"
She still remained silent.
"Take a bath and get dressed!" he ordered.
She didn't move.
Hatori knew that she was medically in a state of shock, but he couldn't help it. He was overwhelmed by too much relief and confusion and ten more emotions he couldn't point a finger on when he saw her safe.
"Get dressed," he ordered again, this time, his voice was softer.
Her eyes, blank and lifeless, were staring at him.
Sighing, he knelt in front of her. "Tohru, what the hell is the problem?"
When he still got no response, he got up and headed towards the kitchen. He decided to make a cup of tea to calm her down.
"W-Why?"
Hatori paused and turned around. Tohru was standing by the kitchen door, looking at him.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
Fresh tears streamed down her cheeks. "You…lied to me."
His heart stopped beating.
She then lost her balance. She was about to fall down on the floor had not Hatori caught her, careful not to let her hands wrap around him.
"Tohru?"
"D-Don't touch me…you are a liar…" she said, her voice broken. "I…was never…we were never…married…"
Hatori cursed under his breath. "I'm so sorry…"
Awhile ago, while on his way home, he had contemplated on Shigure's parting words. That sooner or later, Tohru would find out about his lies. That he should prepare himself for her wrath. It was the price of keeping everything a secret.
The novelist told him that he had no right to decide for her what truths should she not know and what lies should she believe in.
"He was right," he realized aloud.
His hand ran on her hair. "Tohru, I'm sorry."
"I said, don't touch me…" she ordered, but it sounded more as if she was begging.
No, Tohru was not mad. It was much worse. She was confused. She was sad. She was hurt.
And that pain was torturing him even more. He silently wished that she should have slapped him instead. So he wouldn't feel this guilty. No, more than guilty…the pain on her face was ten times the one he was feeling.
"I hate you…" she whispered. "Let me go…"
He instinctively held her closer as he planted small, feathery kisses on her eyelids, her forehead, her nose, her cheeks. He then gazed at her tenderly. "No, I won't let you go. You hate me already. Surely, nothing can be worse than it." His kisses finally found her mouth, and they lingered there, worshipping the honey sweetness of her lips, probing, searching…
His lips slid down the slender smoothness of her neck as his hands started to find a life of its own. He began to unbutton her blouse.
Hatori's lips made its way back to her lips, then managed to whisper, "Tohru, tell me to stop. Just say it…before I lose my control…"
Tohru couldn't speak. She loved the sensation his lips were giving her. Did she really want to stop?
When he heard no objection, he kissed her again, more passionately this time, as he carried her again. They ended up in the living room sofa, lips still imprisoned by each other's. His kisses made their burning trail down her neck again, towards her breasts that were exposed already. His hands began to massage one of the twin peaks, while the other was being worshipped by his mouth.
He felt Tohru arch her body in pleasure. Unmeasurable joy flooded his heart. She wanted him too, just as badly as he wanted her.
His kisses covered every inch of her skin, leaving no stones unturned. He loved every curve of her body, he loved her contours that he found was so beautiful, he loved her velvety softness against his own rough hardness, and he loved her scent and touch. He loved everything about her.
So when he lowered himself into her, he was careful to do it gently as he could. He wanted her to feel the heaven he was feeling right there and then.
Pain crossed her face, so he quickly kissed her mouth with savage passion. She responded with equal fire that was enough to make him melt back into her arms. It was enough to melt every little speck of ice within him. Enough for him to cry out her name in happiness abandon. That he loved her and needed her.
Until the primitive rhythm made them dance – hand in hand. Dance until they both reached the peak, both panting, but both deliriously happy.
Tohru woke up when she felt feathery kisses on her bared shoulder. She turned to her left and found Hatori gazing at her tenderly.
"H-Hatori…"she murmured.
"You gave me the most wonderful dream in my entire life," he whispered huskily. "It was so beautiful…Tohru, you are so beautiful."
Her cheeks turned red. "H-Hatori…"
Silence.
She was the first one to look away. "But this is a mistake…"
His smile vanished.
"We're not husband and wife," she said finally. "This is…this is…"
She remembered Yuki, and guilt filled her heart.
"Rape," he finished, coldness returning to his face.
She flinched.
He sat up abruptly. "I'm sorry then. Now I'm sure my crimes to you and Yuki have increased."
"Hatori…" Her eyes began to well with tears again. She could feel her heart break with the obvious pain that he was feeling. But she had to make sure of one thing. She stood up and covered her body. "I'm leaving."
He lit a cigarette. "The door is over there."
She paused.
He looked at her sarcastically. "Go ahead. The door is not locked. No one's stopping you."
She tried her best to smile as she leaned over to his face and kissed him. "Thank you."
He watched her get dressed, as if it was in slow motion – a slow motion that was crushing his heart with every agonizing second. She then left the front door.
For a moment, he was just staring blankly off into space.
Until finally, like a dam that had broken loose, his frustration and fury made him throw his cigarette on the floor and crush it on the floor with enormous force, as if he was venting out all his emotions into the cigarette butt.
"Damn you, Tohru! Why did you have to come into my life and then disappear so quickly?" He buried his face on his hands. "Why now, when I know I love you?"
tsuzuku