Do ever realize that when you think things are absolutely perfect, it all comes crashing down?

I am now sitting on my bed, absolutely weak from cryiing. I feel like dying, and I don't know what to do. Here is what happened.

*******************************

"Miranda, I got you a cookie."

I smiled at Gordo shyly as he slipped me the big chocolate chip cookie. He was such a good boyfriend. He always walked me to class and never was late. He remembered my favorite movies and drink and colors, and gave me flowers for no reason.

He was a true romantic.

"Sub today in English," Lizzie said as she walked up, "I heard he was a real wacko."

I laughed, and slipped the cookie into my purse. I would eat that during English.

I walked in, taking a seat between Lizzie and Gordo. I had never seen this sub before; he must have been new.

"Hello," he said, "I am Mr. Dig. Mrs. Harris has had her baby, and I will be replacing her for the next three months."

Everyone cheered. No one had liked Mrs. Harris.

"I am assigning a writing assignment."

Everyone stopped cheering.

"You are to write a poem," Mr. Dig said, "A poem that really comes from the heart."

"Thats stupid!" Someone (someone who sounded an swful lot like Danny Kessler) shouted from the back.

Mr. Dig ignored him. "I really want you to put feeling into this. Emotion! Straight from the heart! Got it? I will be grading this on the amount of effort it looks like you put in it."

I tapped my pencil on my chin. What did I feel strongly enough about to write a poem about. I really liked chocolate pudding...Suddenly I looked to the left of me, where Gordo was already writing feverishly. Gordo. My boyfriend.

I began to write.
***********************

"Mom, will she not stop SCREAMING?! I'm trying to do my homework!"

I slipped my headphones on to cover up the sound of the wailing baby. I was putting the finsihing touches on my poem about Gordo. Of course, I never mentioned his name; did I want to die of embarrassment. No, I just called him 'you.' That was vague enough.

I let my head sway to the music that filled my ears. I really liked this song. I stood up and fell on my bed. It was Hilary Duff, a real xool singer that everyone said Lizzie looked like. Lizzie, of course, didn't think she could look like someone so famous and pretty. Oh well.

How it happens
I don't care
If it's rainin'
Or what I wear
I know today is taking me
Where I'm meant to be.

I thought about Gordo. He was sweet and gorgeous. His hair smelled real good too. Very...
Gordo-y. That was a good thing. His kisses felt real good, too. Like it was actually an angel kissing you...or something. I was never very good at thinking up analagies.

Doesn't matter where I go
With my boy shoes
And my rock star phone
I'm waiting for a friend to call
Or the rain to fall.

I went to my backpack and opened it up. I had some math homework to do, too. Searching for my math book, I came opon a blue notebook. I opened it and looked inside the front cover.

David Gordon.

Gordo must have accidently given me his notebook by mistake. I flipped through it. God, Gordo was so smart! It amazed me.


Life goes by
Who knows why

[chorus]
I can't wait for the world to spin
I can't wait to be happenin'
Ooh, What's it gonna take

I can't wait for the time to come
When I'll be shining like the sun
I can't wait (I can't wait)


I found his English poem. I decided to read it. I mean, it wasn't like it was invading his privacy. We were boyfriend and girlfriend, and what could Gordo have to hide?


Bum bum bum
Bum bum bum
Bum bum bum
Yeah.

I read his poem.
Theres this girl I know.
She's my sunshine and my joy.
She smells like strawberries and laughs like melodies.
I'm no writer, and this poem can't do her justicve.

She has hair like beams of light,
Long, gold, wonderful tresses.
That you want to kiss and kiss.
And eyes like sapphires glowing in the light.

Theres this girl I know.
I've known her forever and its seems like all of the sudden
Things are different.
Do I want to be her friend,
Or more.

I stared at that poem. I re-read it and re-read it, trying to make sense of it. But I could only come to one conclusion, and it was a conclusion I didn't like. Gordo loved Lizzie. Not me.

Hot, salty tears filled my eyes and poured over. I wanted to scream. How could he?! How could he lead me on like this? Was it a joke? Was he laughing about it right now?

I ran out of my room. As soon as I removed the headphones, I could hear Cassie screaming at the top of her lungs. The high-pitching wailing only encouraged my heart to beat faster, and I ran out of the house, just running to get as far away fromt hat notebook as possible. I didn't even stop and realize I had left my CD player on the floor, still playing.

Everybody has their day
Where things just seem
To go their way
An angel's gonna
Smile on me
When it's meant to be
'Cause anything's possible
No matter how incredible
You never know who I might meet
On this crowded street

Life goes on
Like a song

I can't wait for the world to spin
I can't wait to be happenin'
Ooh, what's it gonna take

I can't wait for the time to come
When I'll be shining like the sun
I can't wait

I haven't got forever
And I haven't got all day
Oooh, I don't want my world to stay the same
So where's a magic moment
To carry me away

I can't wait for the world to spin
I can't wait to be happenin'
Ooh, what's it gonna take

I can't wait for the time to come
When I'll be shining like the sun
I can't wait

I can't wait for the world to spin
I can't wait to be happenin'
I can't wait

I can't wait
********************************

Oh, pooooooooor Miranda! But it isn't over yet! I think Gordo has what I like to call "Winne Cooper Syndrome". (Oh, I'm so confused, I don't know what love is or who I like) Err, I always hated her. Okay, I'll update real soon!