Author Notes: To be quite honest, I wasn't sure whether I should continue with this fic. It's strange, I know exactly where I want this to go. I have all the romance and the angst figured out—In fact, I even have quite a lot of it written & I have to say, I loved writing the romance. But I'm totally stuck on this chapter. In case you're wondering, chapter 9 - in all its parts - is the set up chapter—the transition chapters if you like. And it's incredibly difficult to write, especially since I decided to take a little detour from the original plot. But basically, I'm trying to work in a little politics for the coming chapters and I know next-to-nothing about American politics, so research is just…
Also, we're so far into S4 that this all seems to surreal to continue with, but some of you kind people decided to email me for this and since it was already written, I'm posting. It's quite possible I'll re-work this part and if any of you have any ideas for any politicking that could be included, or just something you'd like to see this fic tackle, feel free to email me.
And if anyone who emailed me about When I First Met You is reading this, I promise to have the next chapter up with a week. Thanks so much for your interest.
So, now, getting back to this…
Previously…
"Sam's worried about you … He thinks that you should have had more of a reaction to Donna leaving … is there anything you'd like to share?"
Chapter 9b
A noise wakes me up. It's loud and annoying and coming from somewhere in the room. What the hell is that noise? Don't people know I'm trying to sleep here?
Oh, it's the phone.
Don't people know I'm trying to sleep here?
"There better be a national emergency going on somewhere," I mutter into the phone (which, for some reason is on the floor). I manage to grab it barely opening my eyes. It's a skill I've been honing over the last few years.
"Aren't you a ray of sunshine this morning."
"What day is it?"
"Its Friday Josh. You haven't forgotten that you're supposed to pick me up from the airport later, have you?"
"No," there's a hint of indignation in my tone, "I take offence to that Donnatella."
"Yeah, whatever, Joshua." I can just picture her smug look right now.
"You realise that for the first time in what feels like forever, I had the opportunity of getting eight hours uninterrupted sleep right?"
"Well, I do now."
"Donna, I realise this has become something of a ritual for us, but could you do me a favour and stop calling me so early?" I ask using a tone that contradicts the sentiment I just expressed. I really don't mind her calling in the morning. In fact, I might even venture to say that I look forward to it. When I'm not asleep that is.
"Why?"
"I don't know, because maybe I like sleeping?" I add sarcastically, since there's never really anything wrong with that.
"I'm not interrupting anything am I?" Her voice gets a little high as she asks.
"What? No." I'm confused. "Why would you think that?"
"No reason," she answers quickly.
Why would she think-- ah, Amy. I haven't told Donna that we're no longer together, and I don't think Hannah would have told her either.
Interesting.
"You know, for some reason I get the impression that people think I have something against sleep. I like sleep, Donna," I state emphatically, or as emphatically as a man can when woken up abruptly after only four hours sleep and no coffee.
"Yeah, but it's not like you can sleep forever. You have to get up sometime. The country can't run without you, Josh."
"Oh you think you're so funny."
"And I take it you don't." And now I can hear the pout in her voice.
"Well, you do have moments of shall we say--"
"Josh, should I put the phone down now? Let you get back to sleep?" The pout is still there. In fact, I suspect it's out in full force now.
She looks cute when she pouts.
"Well, I'm awake now," I smile.
"So… I shouldn't put the phone down?" I can hear the smile return in her tone and I can't help the fact that my own smile grows wider.
"No," I say softly.
"Ok," she replies using a similar tone.
I relax back against the pillows. "So, what does Donnatella Moss have planned for the day?"
*
"The contents of her fridge?" he asks – or rather, smirks – as we finish Senior Staff and begin to walk back to our offices. "I mean, sure the balloon thing could have been cute, but she throwing yoghurt and chocolate sauce and what ever the hell she threw at you, from a twelve story window no less, well, that's just littering. Imagine the mess she made on the walk below," he grins. Her aim, unfortunately, was pretty good on Monday.
"Sam?"
"Yes?"
"I broke up with Amy on Monday."
"So?"
"It's Friday."
"Again, so?"
"You're only now getting around to asking about this? I'm disappointed in you."
"I can live with that."
"Sure you can."
"I'm going now," he throws out, heading towards the communications bullpen.
"Actually Sam, walk with me for a minute, would you?"
"Sure. What's up?"
Not wanting to have this conversation in view of others, I try and buy some time. "Sam my man, when was the last time you got a hair cut."
"What's wrong with my hair?"
"It's well… you know."
"I think I'm feeling a little insulted here."
"It wasn't a compliment."
"Hey, you asked me here," he says entering my office, "I could always leave.""I need a favour."
"I already agreed to meet with Karen," he states, scrunching up his face. I imagine he's trying to think of what it is I could possibly need from him.
"This isn't about that."
"What kind of favour?"
Now or never, Josh.
"I need you to talk to Donna."
"About what?" he takes a look at my uncomfortable expression and states fervently, "No." He shakes his head for emphasis.
It's not what he thinks.
"It's not what you think."
He strikes his 'challenging' pose; arms crossed over his chest, face stern and his hip kinda, you know, jutted out. "What is it that I think?"
"I'm not trying to sabotage her relationship or anything, because, well, I'm over that."
"That's always good to know. Only I wasn't thinking that," he states talking a seat.
Really? I could have sworn he was.
"Oh. Well good. Good."
"Except, that it sounds suspiciously like you want to sabotage her relationship."
Knew it.
"You don't even know what it is that I need you to talk to her about? How can you assume it has anything to do with Nathan or sabotaging of any kind?"
"Is that meant to be a trick question?" I glower at him. He shrugs, "I know you."
"Sam." I'm using my warning tone, although lately it seems to be having little effect on him, or on anyone really, for that matter.
"Does it have anything to do with Nathan?"
Well…
"It's not what you think," I repeat. It's really not.
He smirks. It's not something he does often, but when he does… Have I ever mentioned that smirking is not one of Sam's endearing qualities? No? It isn't.
"So enlighten me."
"You need to talk to her about moving to London."
Sam's a sensitive guy; he can talk Donna out of what will clearly be a very big mistake. Right?
"She hasn't made a decision yet," he points out.
"Yes, and I want her to make an informed one." And the informed one would be where she chooses to stay here, in DC, preferably with me.
"You think she won't?" He's perplexed.
"You've seen her track record with men."
"Yeah, it's much like yours with women."
Touché.
"Why can't you talk to her?" he asks.
Donna and I have difficulty taking about our significant others with each other; hell we have difficulty talking about anything regarding personal relationships.
But most importantly, I have a feeling I'll be me and say exactly the wrong thing.
"Because she hasn't told me about London herself yet," I say. If she wanted me to know she would've told me.
"So?"
"I don't think she would talk to me about this." I realise that is not a comforting thought right now.
"And you think she'll talk to me?"
Honestly? No. But there's always hope. Except I'm not telling Sam that, so instead I say, "Sure."
"Why not ask CJ to talk to her?"
CJ would laugh at my complete ineptness in being able to tell Donna why I don't think she should go. I'm not in the mood to hear her ridicule me.
I give him a look.
"Hannah then?"
I don't think she would appreciate my second guessing Donna. "She would tell me to butt out."
"That's not bad advice," he murmurs absently.
"Look Sam, I'm really not trying to interfere, I just want her to be absolutely sure about this guy."
Donna once said that Nathan was everything she wanted on paper but something was missing. I just don't want her to rush into things because she thinks she may not find anyone else.
Ok, if I hadn't already been aware of the fact that Amy and I were wrong for each other, that sentence would've been a real eye opener.
Actually, thinking about it, I doubt it very much. I'm pretty sure after that revelation I wouldn't have walked, but ran in the opposite direction, back into the comfortable realm off denial.
"Josh," I'm not sure I like this tone, "I don't know how to tell you this, but Donna may not be rushing into things."
Yep. Definitely not liking it.
"What does that mean exactly?"
"When did Donna last talk to you about Nathan?"
"At her farewell thing," I answer Sam's question. While not entirely accurate—I mean, we have talked about… things since then, but her last day of working for me was the last time Donna gave me a clue as to how she really felt about the boy wonder. Since then she's been…
We don't talk about things like this. And I only now realise how much that scares me.
"Things may have changed since then. From what I can tell, she and Nathan seem to be growing closer. They spend as much time as they can--" She's working on a Presidential campaign, where in the hell is there time for them to 'get closer'? Sam must clearly see what I'm thinking as he states with gravity, "They're making time."
Okay. This is well, news. Hannah never mentioned that. Could she have missed it? Maybe Sam's got it wrong. That's not impossible, right?
"Josh?" I look up to see Cait at the door.
"Yeah?"
"Leo needs to see you."
"Ok."
I slowly walk around my desk towards the door while ignoring the questioning looks from Sam.
"Sam, could you just talk to her? Humour me?"
"Sure."
Ok.
"Ok."
*
"You wanted to see me, Leo?"
"Yeah, Hannah was wrong," Leo says without permeable.
This is not good. "Bruno accepted Stackhouse's offer, I take it. CJ was going to issue a statement--"
"It's a campaign issue. The administration is therefore not going to comment." After a quiet moment he sighs, "Hannah's pissed."
"I would imagine so." She's never liked Bruno but has always respected his political expertise, or at least tried to.
"Bruno told her flat out he wasn't going to take the job. And she believed him."
"So how…"
"Apparently," he looks at me before commenting, "A Senior Strategist for Stackhouse's campaign leaked it to a reporter from The Times." Amy. "Hannah got wind of it before she released any statements."
Thank God for small favours.
"So 'Hannah's pissed' would actually be an understatement," I finally contribute.
"Bruno making her feel like an idiot coupled with Amy's remarks earlier this week… to you and the press-- yeah, pissed would be an understatement. She's not out for blood, yet, but she's on the verge."
"Yeah," I agree.
"Look, lunch tomorrow has been moved. Instead it's dinner tonight."
I'm lost. "Lunch?"
"Karen."
"And you want me to go to dinner," I guess.
"I don't want you to go, but since Hannah is now attending this thing I need you to go. To keep an eye on her."
"Why is Hannah going?"
"Nick told her that Ritchie's people are planning to bring the tape back into play. Their polls aren't looking nearly as good as ours, and that debacle gained them some valuable points. She wants to launch a pre-emptive strike."
"She doesn't think she'll be making the same mistake Sam did?"
"No."
"How does she know that Nick's source is reliable? It's possible that Ritchie's camp leaked that information precisely because they need for her to make the first move."
"Nick wouldn't pass on the information to her unless he knew for certain it was true. Listen to what she wants to do. Even if it is a calculated move from Ritchie's camp, she'll render any plan they had moot."
"Why do you need me there?" I'm doing my absolute best not to whine. Really. It's just that I had plans for tonight, plans that have just been blown to hell. Leo throws me his, 'I really chose this man to be my deputy?' look. "Seriously, she doesn't need me to baby sit her, she can take Sam and…"
It takes me a second to connect the dots.
Sam. The tape. Bruno. Amy.
"Hannah will talk to Sam later, she has some stuff to take care of first so she flying in with Donna. Take Sam with you to the airport. He can take Donna home and you and Hannah can head straight to dinner."
"Sure."
***
"I could go with Hannah," I offer, "The tape was a mistake; I've dealt with it and moved on." It's time everyone else did to.
"Sam, it's not about the tape. Bruno's bound to come up and I should be there to deal with that," he states moving through the crowd of people. "He's not exactly her favourite person right now."
"When was he ever?" I know there's something he's not telling me, but I decide not to press the issue. "Ok. So what of your plans has Bruno managed to screw up?" I ask trailing behind him.
"What?" He's distracted; he didn't even comment on the convoluted sentence I just threw out.
"Donna. Tell me that you didn't plan on picking her up here," I gesture around the airport, "Take her home and then go back to work." I'm not sure that I should pursue this line of questioning given our earlier discussion on the topic. I don't want to encourage him to try and sabotage Donna's relationship with Nathan, but at the same time, I don't think he should avoid her or stop being her friend.
"What does it matter if I did?"
He's an idiot. This is a fact that bears saying out loud.
"You're an idiot."
"I had actually planned on helping her pack, sharing takeout and just… talking. It was going to be a nice relaxed evening," he sighs with regret.
"It could still be that. Karen shouldn't take that long, you could meet up afterwards."
"Yeah."
"In fact," another voice says, "Hannah's going to insist that you do." We both turn around to find a tired looking Hannah smiling softly. I wonder if Josh notices how rung out she looks. I'm also wondering what the hell is happening to cause her to look this weary? Beating herself up over her mistake with Bruno couldn't have had this much of an effect on her.
"Where's Donna?"
"Anxious are we, Joshua?" she smiles.
"Annoying are we, Hannah?"
Josh encompasses her in a surprising bear hug, which she gratefully accepts. I think I hear him ask if she's really ok. In reply, she just hugs him tighter for a second and then smiles.
"Donna's waiting for our luggage; go help her. Sam and I will wait for you by your car."
Josh studies her face for a moment and then answers, "Sure," before leaving.
"Was that meant to be a ploy to get me alone?" I ask, while giving her a quick hug of my own.
"Yes," she states simply as we walk to parking lot.
"What was that with the bear hug and--"
"Nothing," she evades, "Look Sam, I wanted to talk about the--"
"Hannah, like I told Josh, the tape isn't a sore spot for me anymore. I just wish everyone else would get over it." That gets her attention.
"People are hassling you about the tape? Still?" She seems incredulous. And a little pissed that statement could be at all true.
"The fact that Josh is--"
"Josh is coming with me because Leo decided that I needed a chaperone. It has nothing - absolutely nothing - to do with the tape," she states as we reach my car. "Sam, the tape incident was a shambles, you were ignorant and what you did was idiocy pure and simple."
"Let's not beat around the bush or you know, apply tact to our comments."
"You want me to sugar coat everything? Forget it." After a moment she stops, shakes her head and sighs, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be such a bitch there. Sam, the whole tape fiasco? Was ultimately not your fault."
"Hannah." I really don't want to hear false reassurances.
"No, listen Sam. The tape was a campaign issue; the campaign staff should have dealt with it. The second Bruno knew you had the tape he should've taken it away from you and kicked your ass if you even thought about doing anything with it. At the very least, he should have explained the possible ramifications. He was negligent. He didn't do his job and because of that we looked like idiots. I'm not trying to absolve you of anything, I'm just stating the facts as is."
I nod. However, I can't quite manage to keep the scepticism out of my tone.
"What's wrong, Sam?"
"You'd think, being in politics for as long as I have, I should have been able to figure out the 'possible ramifications.'"
"I hate to point this out to you buddy, but you never know everything. Leo, Josh, Toby, hell even me—we've all been doing this longer than you have and yet, we continually make mistakes. The point is that there was someone there at the time who knew more than you did, and he didn't share that knowledge."
"Yeah."
"What's wrong Sam, I mean, really, what's bothering you?"
She's using her mother hen voice, which I should note, has never been tinged with exasperation and exhaustion, until now.
"Is there something going on that I should be aware of?" I ask. "Because it's not unheard of for me to be kept out of the loop." She looks genuinely perplexed. "I get the feeling that Josh is hiding something, and you look almost dead. There's no way you'd let Bruno get to--"
"Oh," she slips.
"Hannah?"
"It's nothing."
"Hannah." There's an edge of warning in my tone now, telling her not to lie to me.
"Don't look at me like that."
"Like what?" I challenge.
"You have a way of looking at me—you should have more faith in me."
"If had just let anyone of us help you, you wouldn't have gotten screwed quite so often."
"Well, yeah, there was that."
I continue giving her that look.
She relents, "Amy threw out some crap about Josh and I when he broke up with her. She insinuated that Josh broke up with her because he and I were-- look, lets just say in Amy's world, what Josh feels for me does not come close to resembling brotherly love."
"You're kidding me."
"I'm really not."
"Seriously?" There maybe some anger in my tone right now. Amy accusing Hannah of stealing Josh is just… Especially considering their history.
"Sam, please don't."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm asking you not to. I've gone through this with Leo, Josh and Abbey already."
"It's not hard to guess, when you did this with Josh you didn't say a thing, with Leo, you told him you were fine and he didn't push, instead he stuck Abbey on your case. And Abbey? You've been avoiding her calls haven't you?" She fails to look me in the eye. "So now you go through this with me."
"Sam."
"Hannah."
"Look, I went through this once already during college. If she still can't get over the fact that Chris chose me then there's really nothing I can do about that. I am not going to let her use my personal life like this."
"What if she doesn't stop with just throwing around insinuations?"
"Then all bets are off. You have my permission to kick her ass any way you want, but only after I'm done with her," she jokes. "Look… what she said is a personal matter, it's between her and Josh, it has nothing to do with me."
I give her a look.
"I'm not going to let her walk all over me Sam, but at the same time I'm not going to let her every stunt dictate how I should behave. I pretty much did that during my first year at college and it got extremely tiring. I've grown up since then even if she hasn't. Okay?"
"Yeah," the doubt still clearly present in my tone.
"Sam, if you can get past that twelve year old girl image you have of me in your head, you'll realise I have grown up in the last fifteen years. I know how to ask for help."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do." She's indignant.
"No you--"
"Look, can we just agree to disagree?"
"Sure." I never realised sarcasm could be so effectively portrayed with one word.
"And you know, this thing you and Josh do, it really is getting to be a pain in the ass."
"This thing Josh and I do? What 'thing.'"
"You and Josh, you—never mind. Josh and Donna are almost here."
"Fine," I grouse.
"Sam. I swear, my mood really has nothing to with Amy."
I study her for a moment and realise that she's telling the truth.
"So, what is the problem?"
"This week has just been one headache after another; I made rookie mistakes and spent far too much time trying to fix them. I'm annoyed because I managed not to do my job this past week. Moreover, we still have over three months till the election and so it's far to early for me to only be sleeping three hours a week, that's it. Well, there's also the fact that I hate looking like crap."
"You don't look well."
She squirms and suspiciously avoids looking at me. I was so willing to believe that Hannah allows Amy to affect her more than she lets on, I didn't actually take a good look at her. I'm beginning to realise that I was concentrating on the wrong issue for the past ten minutes. She doesn't look well at all.
"Have you seen a doctor?"
"Oh for the love of God--"
"Have you?" I press.
"Would it make you feel better if I did?"
"Yes."
"Fine."
"Good."
"Sam?"
"Yes?"
"I love it when you play big brother." She smiles softly. And well, I have to smile back. Reluctantly.
Instead of being annoyed with Hannah, I should make sure Josh's realises Hannah hasn't been well lately.
"Sam," she warns. It's scary when she does that, reads your mind and tells you off before you have a chance to do anything.
"Ok, fine," I placate. I decide to change the topic, "There's something I need to know," I ask in a considerably lighter tone.
She flashes me her grateful smile, "Sure."
"What's happening between Nathan and Donna?"
She smirks, "Is that you asking or Josh?" I think the answer is written on my face. "If he wants to know, he should ask himself."
"Yeah, well, he asked me to talk to Donna on his behalf."
"You're not going to, right? Right?" she questions warningly. "Sam?"
"No, of course not." She doesn't look convinced.
"Sam, do not interfere. Is that clear?"
"Crystal." She still looks sceptical.
Josh and Donna arrive at this precise moment saving me a lecture from Hannah.
"Hannah, we should get going," Josh states after placing their luggage in the trunk of my car.
"Yeah," she says looking at me suspiciously.
Once Hannah's out of earshot, I ask, "So Donna… how's Nathan?"
TBC…
And next on Since Last May…
Oh God… Sam, my man, please, please, *please* tell me you haven't done anything stupid.
"Sam?"
"Just remember that I'm your best friend, and I was trying to help you."
"Sam, I swear, if you don't tell me in 2 seconds--"
"I talked to Donna."
Why do I get the feeling I'm not gonna like this?
"And…?" I prompt.
"You want the good news or the bad?"
Oh God.
"Is the good likely to outweigh the bad?" Please say yes.
"Ah… no."