Screw the Ministry Cause it Can't Screw Back

By: Reirei no miko: Reirei_no_miko@hotmail.com

Warnings: This chapter: PG-13 swearing and adult situations Whole Story: R for angst, rape, torture and psychological manipulation

Chapter 7- Fuck being the School Bitch

"This would look good."

Severus turned his head to eye Narcissa carefully. They were in his dorm- room, the five, four poster beds hung with heavy velvet green hangings, the wood a rich oak. The still burnt-redhead stood, her face stuck in his wardrobe, poking around and pulling things out every so often. "Or this." She held up another black silk dress robe and he rolled his eyes turning back to his book -Macbeth by the wizard playwright Shakespeare.

"Ohhhhh, this is nice." She was fingering his new forest green robe- he knew it by the sound it was making as she ran it through her fingers. He was sure she would look stunning in it but he also knew that -he- would be sporting it the next day.

"You should wear, oh I don't know, a *gown* or something equally as feminine?" he drawled.

She made a disgusting noise at the back of her throat. "Uh, no, I think I'll just borrow this." She took a black silk robe out of his closet- it was a little small and he didn't wear it much but he shut his book and stood up anyway to protect his property.

"You'll not wear that, Silvermoon. You're going with Remus Lupin and you'll dress accordingly."

She rolled the robe up with a malicious gleam in her eye and gave him a wide eyed expression of utter confusion. "Or what? You'll hex me?"

He pulled out his wand and she took off running out his door in a flash.

The chase was on.

Out his dorm, into the common room, up a flight of stairs, through the brick wall, down the hall, up a flight of stairs, skipping the trick step, down another hall, more stairs, and more stairs, around a corner, down another hall, bowling over some Hufflepuff first year and to the still open portrait of the Fat Lady. Rushing through just as the Pink Lady was shutting he was only behind Narcissa by a couple feet. She was laughing, still clutching his clothing and he was out of breath- a bookworm did not run much, after all. She galloped up the last flight of stairs and barricaded herself in her room with the slamming of her thick wooden door as he tore after her and skidded to a halt.

"Silvermoon, give me back my robes THIS INSTANT! You'll dress properly for the Ball and I won't have you wearing MY ROBES! GIVE THEM BACK!" he pounded on the door yelling obscenities for a couple of moments before a shock of red hair beside him made his whirl on the new victim.

Lily gave a weak smile at the seething Slytherin. "Don't worry, we'll get you your robe back and make sure she looks good for the Ball."

"She doesn't have a dress."

"We'll find her something." Lily nodded reassuringly. "It's a girl thing."

Sighing in defeat, he turned and left, ignoring the stares he was receiving from all angles.

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There came another loud screech from upstairs but by now everyone in the common room was so used to it, they didn't even flinch; it had been going on for several hours already.

It was seven o'clock in the evening, the Yule Ball was starting about now but only teachers would be there, everyone knew that things didn't pick up for nearly an hour after the 'official' commencement. But by the sounds coming from the girls' dorm it would be a while before they'd be leaving.

He could pick up Narcissas' voice among the squeals, screams and shouting upstairs, her's was mingled with the other sounds that surrounded him, laughter, shuffling feet, nervous, animated talk........ but his wolf sense was delving through this mass of clutter filling his ears and howling at him in anticipation.

He ran a hand through his neatly brushed hair and shot his sleeves nervously. He was ever grateful to Peter, that all other classes besides, was a transfigurations whiz and had turned one of his older robes into a masterful dress robe of black and gold. He'd never have found something so nice that fell within his price range (not that he -had- a price range) but this was perfect, of course it had cost him a week of extra homework, but that's how the world turned.

He'd learned to trust his senses long ago. When he 'felt' someone behind him, he knew they were, whether they announced their presence or not. The Marauders still thought they could get away with scaring him by coming up behind him- they were very wrong. Even with his stomach in knots he could smell James and as a hand fell on his shoulder sharper and harder then anything friendly he knew that both Peter and Sirius were there as well. But as he inhaled deeply, at least to give them a small show, he noticed a faint floral smell that hung like perfume, masking their natural smells. //Flowers.....// it dawned on him. They said they were going out, he'd decided to stay and they'd went off and bought flowers......... a luxury he couldn't afford.

Sirius came around the wingback chair, smiling and holding a bouquet of a dozen red roses tied with red and gold lace, baby's breath and pine needles accenting them nicely. "Can't scare you anymore hunh Moony?" Sirius was dressed in a black and red formal robe that looked stunning and very, very new. Peter took a seat beside him a smaller, less extravagant bouquet of a mix of roses, wildflowers and greenery that was of so much variety it burst with colour. Peter gave him a small shrug and sheepishly fumbled with a clasp on his red and gold dress robe.

Remus' heart fell, James, of course, bought Lily flowers and since all the fifth year Gryffindor boys were taking their female counterparts he'd be the only one without a floral offering.......

James stepped into view, but didn't seat himself like the other two. He did however tower over Remus in his red and gold dress robe, hair a mess, glasses sitting on his nose sliding a little too far down, a large (larger then both Peter and Sirius' put together) of lily of the valley, roses, daisies and a slight touch of babys' breath wrapped in what looked like a silk covering the stems and white lace dripped almost to his knees.

"Are you all out to make me look bad?" he asked mournfully, suddenly very conscious of his transfigured robes, polished every-day shoes and brushed back hair........

Sirius shook his head, "Moony," he said very seriously, " Malfoy was in the flower shop in Hogsmead,"

Remus shook his head, //the whole school was probably in that flower shop......//

"He was leaving when he asked where you were, we told him you were here and he went back in- cut the line and ordered the biggest, most expensive bouquet there was and said 'throw some Narcissa in there, their not nearly beautiful as the girl I'm going to sweep off of her feet but they'll do."

James nodded solemnly.

"And this is supposed to cheer me up!?" Remus demanded, getting to his feet, ready to just call it quits. // I can't win if my friends aren't backing me and I'm up against Malfoy.//

"Au contraire!" Peter chirped, jumping up.

James grinned, "This is." From behind his back he pulled out a stunning Christmas arrangement of roses, pine needles, pinecones and mistletoe. Struck speechless he floundered for words of thanks but couldn't find any that were adequate.

"I think he'd grateful." Peter said turned to James who put the flowers in his friends trembling hands.

"Thank you so much....... I......."

James waved his hand, "Don't thank me, Rem. It was Sirius' idea."

Eyes wide Remus turned to his still seated Padfoot. The latter shrugged uncomfortably fiddling with the laces, "I don't want Malfoy to show you up- you're better then him."

"He didn't want you to lose your girl cause he sees how happy you've been since she said yes." James filled in, sitting down in a love seat to Remus' right. Peter followed suit while Sirius shot them both dirty looks. "I just like seeing you happy, Moony, I just wish it was with someone else, but it's your life and if she makes you happy then I support it and I won't let Malfoy screw it up."

"Thank you, Sirius, that means a lot."

They shared a smile and nodded- they were friends and would be happy for each other.

The portrait hole opened and everyone turned to see Severus Snape standing in the opening.

Black jumped to his feet, putting his bouquet down, and strode over to meet the Slytherin.

"Snape, how did you get in?"

Black eyes swiveled to meet the Gryffindor who stood two inches shorter then the green velvet dressed pureblood. "Your painting let me in."

Black was about to answer something when a shriek erupted from upstairs, the boys shared a look.

"I'm supposed to go give these-" he motioned to some jewelry in his hands, "to Evans."

James, one hand on Sirius' shoulder, nodded. They all watched as the Slytherin walked up the stairs, knocked on the door, was confronted with a hand in which he put the cluster of metal and jewels and came back down. Where he took a seat.

"You've made you delivery." Black said.

"I have no intention of missing -this- show."

Another shrill shriek from the closed room made them all quiver.

Half an hour later the common room was empty save for the still awaiting fifth years and Severus. Black had been glaring at the Slytherin for almost that entire time wondering how he could not be worried, listening to the swearing, screaming and thudding that was going on.

The noise stopped and a moment later the door opened quietly. All the boys stood up, picked up their bouquets and stood in a line, looking up at the stone balcony patiently awaiting to see the effect so many hours of preparation had accomplished. Ethel emerged, dark hair pinned up in curls that framed her face elegantly, she smiled brightly at Peter and came down the stairs eagerly. He gave her a kiss on the cheek, said hello and offered her the flowers which she accepted with another charming smile. Cassidy came next, her golden gown glimmering in contrast with her soft, straight orange hair. As she came to the foot of the steps, Sirius chivalrously helped her down the last one and with a grand sweeping motion presented her with her flowers. She gave an effeminate sigh of surprise and accepted them graciously allowing Sirius to give her a full kiss on the lips. He turned to give James a 'thumbs up' and with a quick motion Potter told Black he had lipstick on his mouth. Lily came next and all humour at his friends' red mouth was forgotten as he found himself lost in the sight. A deep red dress, matching her deep red hair which was half curled, half pinned and half plaited with small bursts of what looked to be gold painted baby's breath, red shoes and delicate red-gold jewelry of the tear-drop sort brought out Lily's clearly green eyes. The simplest of make-up and more than a little blush, she had only eyes for James as he took her hand and gave her her flowers which she accepted sweetly, her blush deepening to a near-crimson.

Remus turned his eyes up to the stone balcony and waited.

Everyone else turned, and waited.

Lily cleared her throat, and waited.

And waited.

"Narcissa!" Lily called out to the open door, "If you don't come down, we'll get Lucius to come here to get his dance!"

"No you won't!" came a small, scared sounding voice.

"They won't, I will." Severus spoke up, crossing his arms. Lily gave him a grateful smile, they all knew he would, too.

"Severus why are you still here?"

"I couldn't miss seeing you dressed up darling!"

"I'm not dressed up, I'm dressed down!" came her desperate wail.

Impressed the Slytherin turned to the nervously fidgeting girls. "You got her in her natural hair and eye colour?"

They nodded a little sourly but smiled at Remus reassuringly, "She's beautiful Remus."

Sirius gave a snort saying, "What, are you afraid we'll laugh, Silvermoon?"

"You -will- laugh!"

Remus barely caught himself as Snape pushed him two steps forward, "Call out to her! Make her want to come down!" he hissed.

Remus swallowed desperate. "If....... Ah......if you, um, don't want to, ah, go......... Then, ah, I can just, um, stay here........."

There was a pause, a heavy sigh and a cursed, "I hate you Severus." Before the door opened completely and Remus dropped his flowers.

She stopped at the top of the stairs, a pink blush staining her cheeks as she gave a weak smile to them all below before turning to come down the stairs. She looked like an angel. Her white-honey blond hair loose in soft wavy curls that fell past her hips, bright-ocean blue eyes and a creamy, perfect complexion. Accenting this was a black velvet dress with red and green roses embroidered in delicate silk on both neck and sleeves. A heavy golden, ruby encrusted belt hung nearly off of her hips and dangled to past- knee length ending in a fist sized rose ball. Vines climbed this and the theme was carried through her necklace where a similar rose hung from vines also. A simple yet elegant pendant hung from her forehead again carrying the vines and sporting a dangling red ruby that shone from between her eyebrows. Her sleeves were medieval looking, long and swooping, they fell from her elbows in a near triangle to her delicate white wrists. As she came around the curve of the stairs they could hear her slippers brushing the stone floor as her circle skirt flowed around her gracefully, hugging every curve she normally hid.

Remus was so absorbed by his shock that Lily jumped forward (knowing he wouldn't take the initiative) swooped down grabbing his forgotten and dropped flowers, closed his mouth, pushed the bouquet into his hand, and shoved him forward. He stumbled a bit but came to the foot of the stairs and caught himself against the wall- not crushing his gift thankfully. Narcissa smiled at him, a genuinely beautiful smile and tripped over the hem of her skirt.

He caught her and she spent a moment readjusting herself, relishing his embrace. He held her gently, smelling her and feeling her and touching the soft waves of hair that flowed down her back in cascades. Neither said a word, it seemed they didn't have to, he smiled and she returned in kind. He handed her the flowers, her smile grew, and his reciprocated. James cleared his throat and they turned, both looking deliriously happy, and it seemed infectious because soon everyone was smiling.

Severus stepped forward and took Narcissas' hand, the one Remus wasn't holding. "Severus." She demurred in a voice Remus reveled in- he'd never heard her speak so softly before.

"She speaks!" a mischievous grin passed the Slytherins lips as he continued, kissing her hand, "O, speak again, bright angel, for thou art/As glorious to this night, being o'er my head, /As is a winged messenger of heaven /Unto the white-upturned wond'ring eyes/ Of mortals that fall back to gaze on him /When he bestrides the lazy puffing clouds

And sails upon the bosom of the air." He turned his eyes meaningfully back to Remus who suddenly looked a little nervous, "Take care of her, Romeo or the Capulets' will seek your blood."

A/N: Wow this was supposed to *BE* the Yule Ball but it's all just getting ready for the Yule Ball......... um, so again, next chapter is the Yule Ball (I swear!) and the chapter after that is the walk *after* the Yule Ball...... Geeze, am I too long winded, should I cut down on detail or something? Keep it like this or change it up? Comments, questions, hate it, love it, please just say something!