It WAS a normal day at JCpennys

By, Genrou No Miko

Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi or JCPenny!

Note: Okay this is a weird fic! VERY weird. Me and my friend (Saihitei No Miko) were really hyper and we were talking about JCpennys and soon, we thought about Tomo working there in the make up section... weird ne? Well, yeah. So once again this is a warning... this is a weird fic, well none of my fics are normal so yea.... Neways I need to give half... nah 1% credit to Amy (Saihitai No Miko) Ha Ha actually more like 50% so on with the fic! Oh, Also my friend told me there was a fic called 'It WAS a normal day at the market' A fushigi Yugi fic, but I promise I didn't get the idea from that fic. So if the author is reading this I didn't steal it from you! I swear on Tasuki's tessen! Okie? so... R/R ~Danie (tasuki_grrrl@yahoo.com)

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CHAPTER 1

"Am I a fire engine red or a pearly pink?" Tomo asked himself, admiring himself in the mirror. "I say Fire eng--"

"Uh... 'Scuse me?"

"Yeeeeesh?" Tomo turned around, lipstick half putten on.

"Can you tell me where the--OH MY GOD! TOMO!?"

"N-N-Nuriko? What're you doing here!?"

"What else? Shopping ya idiot, what about you?" Nuriko asked, placing his hands on his hips eyeing Tomo suspiciously.

"Uh-Uh... This is my new job, got a problem with that?" Tomo crossed his arms and stuck his nose up in the air. "I mean, why wouldn't they hire such a--" Tomo paused, he rose his eyebrow. "Is that Hotohori?" Nuriko turned his head.

"Yeah..." He sweatdropped.

"I would look SO much better on that poster! Hmf! Look at him! He doesn't have the right... everything to do that!" Hotohori said, glaring at the Calvin Klein underwear poster. "He isn't even HALF as beautiful as me!"

"Oy... If he is here that means the others are here too..." Tomo shook his head. "And my magic 8 ball said it was going to be a good day for me..."

"8 ball? Your joking..." Nuriko laughed.

"O-Of course I am!" Tomo snorted. "Who would play with an... 8 ball..."

"You..."

"Hey you! Wouldn't I look so much better on that poster? Hey I'm talking to you!" Hothori yelled.

"Uhm... Tomo I better go stop hotohori... before he scares away all of the people. Good luck? I guess..." Nuriko waved and walked away grabbing Hotohori by the collar and walking into the womans section. Tomo sweatdropped, but before he did that he heard... "Oh my god! Wouldn't I look so cute in this shirt hoto-sama?" and a cry for help. Tomo couldn't help wonder where the other Suzaku Seishi were. But the most important thought going through his mind was was Nakago here?

Meanwhile...

Wandering around the store Chichiri spotted Mitsukake.... But he was in the underwear section... the WOMEN'S underwear section. Chichiri hid behind a rack of clean undies.

"Hm..." Mitsukake placed his fingers underneath his chin. "Yep..." He nodded his head. "That would look mighty fine on Shouka..."

"Da..." Chichiri sweatdropped.

Soon Mitsukake broke into tears. "But she can't because... shes... she's... DEAD!!!!" The word 'dead' echoed through the store. Mitsukake hid his face behind his hands. Sob.

"Maybe I should go see how Tasuki is doing... daaa..." Chichiri whispered to himself, walking away from the underwear section. FAST.

In the Bra section....

"Damn, why do I always get dragged t' stupid stores... I always get lost!" Tasuki froze. "No..." His eyes widened. "No!" Tasuki panicked. "Th-There everywhere!!!" Tasuki tried to run, but the more he ran the more popped up, he ran until... there was a DEAD END. "I'm trapped!" He leaned against the wall and slid down. "N-Nooooooooooo!" He burying his face into his jacket. "Get away from me!"

"Sir are you alright?" A lady asked.

Tasuki didn't answer, he kept muttering to himself 'I am a big, bad wolf... I'm not afraid of anything...'

The lady backed away from him slowly. "Uhm... I'm sure he is okay, maybe on crack but he is alright..."

"I am a big bad wolf..."

In the other sections...

Tamahome grinned evilly. "Hee... Miaka's not here that means..." He looked right to left. "And no one I know is around..." He ran into the womans section and grabbed all the shirts and pants he could hold and ran into the fitting room. He cackled evilly. "Why do girls have all the fun?" He asked himself slipping on some tight jeans and a metallic blue tank top. "Ow! I'm hot!" He said, posing, and chanting out the stupidest pick up lines like 'Hey you. I bet your legs are tired 'cause you've been running through my mind all day!" He giggled. Soon, he stopped.

"Thong thong thong thong..."

"Its... my soooong!" He said, putting on the thong that happened to appear in his pile of clothes. "Shake dat thang!" He said singing along to the thong song.

"Come on Hoto--Oh my...." Nuriko dropped Hotohori placing his hand over his mouth. "Uh... Tama-baby..."

Tamahome looked up. After all that shaking he bumped the door open and about 30 people were staring at him. "Uh... Uh... Uh... Uh..."

"Tama-baby... I'm supposed to be the only crossdresser here..."

"But I thought you went straight..."

Nuriko snorted. "Yeah, Yeah, but I just saw the cutest shirt and I had to try it on... but seeing it on you I suddenly changed my mind..."

Tamahome blushed and closed the door.

Nuriko rolled his eyes. "And they thought I was weird..."

Later on...

"Nooooo! Help meeeeee!!!!"

"Da?"

Poor little Chiriko was being dragged by the power of his symbol to the book store. "Chichiri! Help! I can't... help myself... Help... Only you can save me oniwaban..."

"Na No Da? Oro?"

Out of nowhere Aoshi Shinomori popped up. "Its Obi Wan Dumb Ass! Don't use my group's name in vain!"

Then Kenshin... "Listen to him! And Oro is my word no da!"

"Hey no da!"

"Da...? Oro?"

"Da?"

"Ornoda?"

"Oro?"

"Wait... am I Chichiri or Kenshin?"

"Da... I think I am Chichiri..."

"Hello! What about me?!?!" Chiriko yelled at them hanging onto a shelf hanging on for dear life.

"Oro? I can't help this is a Fushigi Yugi Fic..."

"Right... Lets leave..." Soon, Aoshi and Kenshin disappeared and a little note fell to the group. It said...

"Oro is my word! Use it and I'll use my ULTIMATE attack on you!"

and in little words...

"Never say Oniwaban in vain or you will die!"

"....Da... I'll keep that in mind..."

"CHICHIRI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Da... someone help me... no da...."

~End of chapter one