Okay, guys. This fic is drawing to a close. It was going to b longer, but
it just ended so well, that I decided to stop. If I become inspired, I'll
write a sequel.. Sound good? Glad you agree.
Hiei's a bit out of character. But, that's okay. I will say the angst turns to fluff toward the end. I can't help it. I hate sad endings unless I'm in the right mood.
Usual disclaimers. As much as I would love to claim these two lovelies for my own, there's no possible way I could have been such a genius. Therefore, they are not mine, and I lay no claim to anything but my part angsty, part fluffy plot.
Please give me more reviews! I'm greedy! And shameless! See, I'm begging!
Thank you to everyone who's reviewed so far, and also to those who've read it. Your positive comments made me happy! *Hugs you all*
Also thanks go to my koi, who I would not have been able to do this without.
So, on to the fic!
~midnyte-fox
* * * * * * * * * *
Nothing mattered.
I was a complete fool. I had let my anger overcome any sense I possessed. And the anger was irrational. I'd had no reason to feel such rage. What was wrong with me?
Part of me insisted I didn't know.
The other part just laughed, forcing something to the front of my mind where I couldn't look away from it.
I was afraid.
I closed my eyes, tears renewing their courses down my cheeks. I walked back to my bed, not caring that I was drenched, wearing only a towel. I sank down onto the mattress.
I was afraid. It was true. I had been afraid that Hiei wouldn't feel the same way. Hell, I was afraid that he would. I was afraid of our relationship progressing any more, and yet I wanted it to so badly.
I shook my head violently, and crawled up to lean against the headboard, where Hiei had been. His scent still lingered on my pillows, the smell of the trees and wind. Drawing my knees up in front of me, I wrapped my arms around them and buried my head in my arms. Hiei's voice echoed in my mind.
"Baka kitsune."
He'd said it so many times. Never had it been more true. I was a complete fool, worse than the ningens he hated so much. With misery and self- loathing foremost in my mind, I sobbed into my arms, tears mingling with the few droplets of water still left on my skin.
Suddenly I felt wrong. My anger, my fear, all of it was wrong. It was uncalled for, evil. I was evil. Unclean. I had let Hiei touch me, soiled his hands. Who was I to dirty him thus? I gulped back my tears, taking deep desperate breaths. I didn't deserve him. He'd broken completely away from his normal self, gone completely on a whim, and had kissed me, touched me, opened up to me.
And me? I had thrown it back in his face. I had closed his heart, proven to him exactly why human emotion was a weakness. Why it was worthless. Why I was worthless.
I clenched my hands, nails digging into my palms. The pain was barely noticeable.
Guilt clouded my mind, followed closely by overwhelming pain. A part of me cried out in warning, that something wasn't quite right, but I just took it as one more problem with me as a whole.
Suddenly my room was too small, the walls too confining. I had to get away.
Frantically, I threw my towel to the floor and searched for some clothing. Dressing quickly, I ran out of my room, down the stairs, and out the door. My mother was at work. Halfway down the walkway, I realized I should lock the door. I returned to the entranceway, fumbling with my keys, swearing as I took too long.
Finally I heard the tumbler fall into place, and I sprinted off, shoving my keys in my pocket.
* * * * *
The forest was cool, trees shading my body from the sun as I ran. I had no destination, no goal. I only knew that I had to keep going. My sides ached, my legs burned, and every breath I drew was accompanied by a stab of pain in my lungs. My clothing tore as I rushed headlong, heedless, through the trees, until, finally, I fell sprawling onto the ground.
My right hand landed at the edge of a small stream. The icy water trickled over my fingertips. I stayed prone, not sure if I ever wanted to move again.
Reluctantly, I sat up, glancing to my left ankle, which had been ensnared by some plant or another. Heedless of the large thorns, I pulled it away from my body, noticing a large rip. Parting the cloth, I saw blood well from a deep scratch. It hadn't even begun to sting yet.
Watching the red liquid soak through my clothing, I smiled. It was deeper, bigger than I had thought, to produce so much blood. Somehow, it all felt better. My anger, my confusion, my momentary insanity, was gone, replaced by a single, stinging wound. I watched the blood run, soaking into the ground beneath me. It stained the earth a dark, deep color, somewhere between darkest night, rubies, and chocolate. I was so fascinated, I didn't even hear the footsteps.
I jumped when he spoke.
"My foolishness is no excuse for you to go running headlong from your home to go hurt yourself."
The acidic tones played on my ears like music. He was not happy, but he was here!
"Hiei, I-"
"Quiet." He knelt beside me, ripping away the fabric and probing my ankle. I gasped in pain. "Baka kitsune. This will take some time to mend." Without another word, he unwound his scarf, sliced part of it off with his katana, dipped it in the stream, and began to wash away the blood that was even now beginning to slow. I winced a little, but he just frowned. When he was finished, he tied the rest of his scarf around my ankle, winding it tight, and sat back a little.
"Hiei-" I tried to speak, but he cut me off.
"Kurama, what in the hell were you thinking?" He stood up, hands balled into fists at his sides, shaking with rage. "Never mind that. You weren't thinking. You were feeling, and letting those feelings run away with what little sense you've managed to retain." He glared down at me, crimson eyes slitted.
"Hiei." I was at a loss for words. "I'm sorry."
"Damn right, you're sorry! You had better be sorry after pulling that stunt! Of all the idiotic things! Don't you even realize what you feel? You're the one that's supposed to feel things. Not me. After I left. I felt it, baka! You snapped! You completely lost it! I don't know what did it, but we are going to have a good, long talk. Now, before I change my mind and leave you to your own psychosis."
With that said, he pulled me to my feet, sliding one arm to hold my waist tightly.
"Where are we going?" I looked down at him.
"Where do you think? Baka kitsune. Your home. Hn." He glared up at me. "And no bolting this time." He moved slowly, snapping at me. "You'll lose even more blood if you put any weight on that."
I frowned. "I'll be fine."
He glared at me. "I would keep silent right now, were I you, fox."
I felt the blood drain from my face. He was truly angry. Not like when he was violent, or annoyed. True anger. It didn't stem from ill will, so it had to be something else. Perhaps disgust. No, that wasn't right. He would have left me on my own, had that been it. Maybe he was disappointed in me. No, that wouldn't cause such anger. But that only left-
Fear?
I looked down at him. His jaw was tight, lips drawn thin. His eyes flashed between rage and some nameless emotion. My arm lay across his shoulders, and I could feel the tension that knotted his muscles. He was afraid. Or something akin to it.
We reached my home shortly after two. I barely made it up the stairs, even with Hiei's help. My ankle was really starting to throb, but my head felt clear for the first time in what seemed like weeks.
Hiei deposited me none too gently on my bed, and ordered me to stay put in a voice that sent chills down my spine. He was no less angry with me than he had been. I watched as he walked over to my closet and took a first aid kit from the shelf. After going to the linen closet and grabbing an old towel, he sat on the carpet at my feet.
He spread the towel out on the floor, then unwrapped my ankle. The blood was still bright red. It hadn't quite stopped yet.
Hiei opened the first aid kit, taking out a few packages of alcohol wipes. I bit my lip as he opened one and began to clean and disinfect the wound. The pain shot through me. I gritted my teeth. I had borne much worse. And I heal quickly. I would be fine.
After most of the blood was removed, I looked down at it. The scratch was deep, cutting to the bone of my ankle. It stretched from the left side of the ankle on my left foot, around the front, and up the side of my calf, ending about halfway to my knee. It was only serious for about half the length, which I was grateful for.
Hiei finished cleaning it and fished around in the kit for some clean white bandages. After a moment, he found a roll of gauze and proceeded to wrap the wound, expertly pulling it tight to keep the pressure on it. When he finished, he tidied things up, slinging the unsoiled towel over the back of a chair.
I stared at him, dully realizing that I had no idea what to expect. Finally, he turned back to me, legs spread in an aggressive stance, and crossed his arms over his chest. His voice was like his katana, sharp and deadly.
"What gives you the right to make me feel like this?"
I flinched. "I-"
"Let me finish." He looked at me angrily. "What gives you the right to preach to me about ningen feelings," he said it as if it were something distasteful, " and then when I open up to you, to become angry with me?" He turned away from me, walked to the open window. I remained silent, sensing he had more to say.
I was right.
"Kurama," he began, turning around to regard me from across the room, "when I first met you, I thought you would be cold and cruel. The famous Youko Kurama, renowned thief of the Makai. I thought you would be an asset, the perfect partner for the crime." His smile was ironic. "When I saw you, I nearly didn't want to go through with it. You were perfect. Beautiful. I wanted to know you. Not just as an associate, but as something more. Why do you think I was so cruel toward you? I knew that if anyone could break through the shell I had erected around myself, it would be you."
He removed his cloak and katana, setting them neatly on top of my desk.
"When I realized that, I had to close myself off even tighter. I could not afford anything getting in the way of my search for Yukina. That was all that mattered. I knew that if I let myself know you, suddenly it wouldn't just be about Yukina anymore. You were so kind to everyone I saw you interact with. I knew that if we became close, I wouldn't be able to search for her with the same intensity."
His eyes met mine, solemn and angry.
"When I was alone, it didn't matter as much if I died looking for her. After all, she didn't know about me. She couldn't be hurt by the death of a brother she didn't know existed. But, you. If I died, I knew you could be hurt. I wasn't willing to risk that. I couldn't. And yet, it didn't matter, did it? Yukina's safe, and here I am making a fool out of myself over some stupid fox who can't even figure himself out!"
His voice has raised to shouting level. I cringed. His hands were back at his sides, fists clenched. He wasn't really looking at me. His gaze went over my head, at the wall behind me.
"For all that I'm supposed to be the one who doesn't feel things, I can at least admit to myself that there is something between us! You! You close it off, worry about it, analyze it, pretend it's something else, warp it out of all recognition until you don't know what it was that was there in the first place! You go over it in your mind until you're so obsessed with it that you can't change it. You cling to the emotion, the turmoil, the pain of not knowing, because you're so afraid that once you acknowledge it and take action on it, it won't be there anymore. You're afraid it will change. For all your years with ningens, you still aren't used to the emotions. You still think that if it changes, it's different. Not better! Not worse! All you register is that it's gone!"
He walked toward me, angrily. He stopped a few feet away, looking down slightly into my eyes. I was shocked. I could feel tears well at the corners of my eyes, then felt them overflow, spill down my cheeks. The pain was acute. He was right. I had caused everything. It was my own fault. I had been to afraid to let things progress as they should have. Therefore, I had tried to change it, to make it something I could define, handle, keep in a little box. I closed my eyes. Damn it, he was right!
Hands on my shoulders made me gasp. I kept my eyes squeezed shut, afraid that if I opened them, he wouldn't be there any more. One hand moved, sliding into my hair and tightening into a fist, forcing me to tilt my chin up. I shivered as the other hand wiped the tears from my cheeks, rough, callused fingers smoothing over my skin. I dared not open my eyes.
Soft lips crushed against my own as the hand in my hair tightened. The hand that had been touching my cheek slid around my shoulders, tightening, pulling me against him. His mouth moved over mine, demanding and harsh. I was pliant, yielding. My mouth opened under his, and the kiss deepened.
Slipping directly from shock into desire, I lifted my arms to his waist, tightening them as he broke the kiss. He pulled my head back further, baring my throat. I opened my eyes briefly, meeting his. They were filled with a wild determination. I opened my mouth to speak. He cut me off.
"Don't say anything. Baka. Don't you think I know that if I let you think, you'll close up on me again? You get no say until I'm done with you."
I opened my mouth again, to protest, but his mouth on my neck drove all thought from my mind, and a small moan escaped my lips. I shivered. My senses reeled.
I had never before realized how very easy it was to go from desperation and hysteria to blind desire. I shuddered. Fear tried to surface again. Then Hiei's hands were sliding under my shirt, touching my stomach, my back, my chest. He drew the garment up, over my head, and pushed me back. My body hit the mattress, and he followed, one knee on either side of my hips, holding me captive.
I was shaking. "Hiei-"
He smiled slowly, sensually. His voice, when he spoke, was husky, deepened with desire. "I already told you. Don't think. Feel." He lowered his head and nipped at my collarbone. I shivered, wanting. His body hovered above mine. Then he kissed me again, deep and demanding, pressing himself against me, and all thought deserted me for quite some time.
* * * * *
Thankfully Shiori works long hours. Neither of us noticed the time until we woke up, having dozed for a couple of hours. I blushed, thinking of what had transpired. Happily, I noticed one arm wrapped around my waist. I felt Hiei's breathing on the back of my neck.
I started to turn. The arm tightened.
"Hn. Did you have to move?" Hiei spoke into my ear, sounding for all the world like a querulous child having been woken up too early. I laughed, turning the rest of the way, and propping myself up on one elbow. Hiei sat up, leaning against the headboard. He surveyed the room. "Messy, weren't we?"
I glanced around. Clothing was strewn everywhere. "Oh, well." I yawned.
When I looked back at him, his eyes were serious. "Kurama, I don't want this to be forced for you."
I looked at him in bewilderment. "Forced?"
He nodded. "I want you to be comfortable with our relationship progressing to this level."
I smiled. "Hiei, I wanted it as much as you did. I was just," I paused, "afraid."
He looked at me, crimson eyes betraying nothing. "Are you still?"
I shook my head.
He nodded. "Good."
I glanced at the clock. There was still another hour before Shiori came home. Rising, I walked toward the bathroom.
Hiei watched me. "Where are you going?"
I cast a glance back over my shoulder. "Shower." I kept walking.
I didn't see him move, but I wasn't surprised when a pair of arms slid around me from behind as I stepped into the shower. I could feel him lean his cheek against my shoulder as the water streamed over us. Silently, I washed my hair, turning to blow bubbles at him from my hand.
He blinked at me, eyes wide and surprised.
I smiled and turned back around. "I love that expression." I lowered my voice. "And you."
He tensed, but it quickly passed. He waited for me to rinse the soap from my hair. Then he bit down on the back of my neck. I gasped.
He chuckled. "I love that noise." His voice was quiet, but forceful. "And you, too, kitsune."
* * * * * * * * * *
It's all over! *Cries* Hope you liked it!
Hiei's a bit out of character. But, that's okay. I will say the angst turns to fluff toward the end. I can't help it. I hate sad endings unless I'm in the right mood.
Usual disclaimers. As much as I would love to claim these two lovelies for my own, there's no possible way I could have been such a genius. Therefore, they are not mine, and I lay no claim to anything but my part angsty, part fluffy plot.
Please give me more reviews! I'm greedy! And shameless! See, I'm begging!
Thank you to everyone who's reviewed so far, and also to those who've read it. Your positive comments made me happy! *Hugs you all*
Also thanks go to my koi, who I would not have been able to do this without.
So, on to the fic!
~midnyte-fox
* * * * * * * * * *
Nothing mattered.
I was a complete fool. I had let my anger overcome any sense I possessed. And the anger was irrational. I'd had no reason to feel such rage. What was wrong with me?
Part of me insisted I didn't know.
The other part just laughed, forcing something to the front of my mind where I couldn't look away from it.
I was afraid.
I closed my eyes, tears renewing their courses down my cheeks. I walked back to my bed, not caring that I was drenched, wearing only a towel. I sank down onto the mattress.
I was afraid. It was true. I had been afraid that Hiei wouldn't feel the same way. Hell, I was afraid that he would. I was afraid of our relationship progressing any more, and yet I wanted it to so badly.
I shook my head violently, and crawled up to lean against the headboard, where Hiei had been. His scent still lingered on my pillows, the smell of the trees and wind. Drawing my knees up in front of me, I wrapped my arms around them and buried my head in my arms. Hiei's voice echoed in my mind.
"Baka kitsune."
He'd said it so many times. Never had it been more true. I was a complete fool, worse than the ningens he hated so much. With misery and self- loathing foremost in my mind, I sobbed into my arms, tears mingling with the few droplets of water still left on my skin.
Suddenly I felt wrong. My anger, my fear, all of it was wrong. It was uncalled for, evil. I was evil. Unclean. I had let Hiei touch me, soiled his hands. Who was I to dirty him thus? I gulped back my tears, taking deep desperate breaths. I didn't deserve him. He'd broken completely away from his normal self, gone completely on a whim, and had kissed me, touched me, opened up to me.
And me? I had thrown it back in his face. I had closed his heart, proven to him exactly why human emotion was a weakness. Why it was worthless. Why I was worthless.
I clenched my hands, nails digging into my palms. The pain was barely noticeable.
Guilt clouded my mind, followed closely by overwhelming pain. A part of me cried out in warning, that something wasn't quite right, but I just took it as one more problem with me as a whole.
Suddenly my room was too small, the walls too confining. I had to get away.
Frantically, I threw my towel to the floor and searched for some clothing. Dressing quickly, I ran out of my room, down the stairs, and out the door. My mother was at work. Halfway down the walkway, I realized I should lock the door. I returned to the entranceway, fumbling with my keys, swearing as I took too long.
Finally I heard the tumbler fall into place, and I sprinted off, shoving my keys in my pocket.
* * * * *
The forest was cool, trees shading my body from the sun as I ran. I had no destination, no goal. I only knew that I had to keep going. My sides ached, my legs burned, and every breath I drew was accompanied by a stab of pain in my lungs. My clothing tore as I rushed headlong, heedless, through the trees, until, finally, I fell sprawling onto the ground.
My right hand landed at the edge of a small stream. The icy water trickled over my fingertips. I stayed prone, not sure if I ever wanted to move again.
Reluctantly, I sat up, glancing to my left ankle, which had been ensnared by some plant or another. Heedless of the large thorns, I pulled it away from my body, noticing a large rip. Parting the cloth, I saw blood well from a deep scratch. It hadn't even begun to sting yet.
Watching the red liquid soak through my clothing, I smiled. It was deeper, bigger than I had thought, to produce so much blood. Somehow, it all felt better. My anger, my confusion, my momentary insanity, was gone, replaced by a single, stinging wound. I watched the blood run, soaking into the ground beneath me. It stained the earth a dark, deep color, somewhere between darkest night, rubies, and chocolate. I was so fascinated, I didn't even hear the footsteps.
I jumped when he spoke.
"My foolishness is no excuse for you to go running headlong from your home to go hurt yourself."
The acidic tones played on my ears like music. He was not happy, but he was here!
"Hiei, I-"
"Quiet." He knelt beside me, ripping away the fabric and probing my ankle. I gasped in pain. "Baka kitsune. This will take some time to mend." Without another word, he unwound his scarf, sliced part of it off with his katana, dipped it in the stream, and began to wash away the blood that was even now beginning to slow. I winced a little, but he just frowned. When he was finished, he tied the rest of his scarf around my ankle, winding it tight, and sat back a little.
"Hiei-" I tried to speak, but he cut me off.
"Kurama, what in the hell were you thinking?" He stood up, hands balled into fists at his sides, shaking with rage. "Never mind that. You weren't thinking. You were feeling, and letting those feelings run away with what little sense you've managed to retain." He glared down at me, crimson eyes slitted.
"Hiei." I was at a loss for words. "I'm sorry."
"Damn right, you're sorry! You had better be sorry after pulling that stunt! Of all the idiotic things! Don't you even realize what you feel? You're the one that's supposed to feel things. Not me. After I left. I felt it, baka! You snapped! You completely lost it! I don't know what did it, but we are going to have a good, long talk. Now, before I change my mind and leave you to your own psychosis."
With that said, he pulled me to my feet, sliding one arm to hold my waist tightly.
"Where are we going?" I looked down at him.
"Where do you think? Baka kitsune. Your home. Hn." He glared up at me. "And no bolting this time." He moved slowly, snapping at me. "You'll lose even more blood if you put any weight on that."
I frowned. "I'll be fine."
He glared at me. "I would keep silent right now, were I you, fox."
I felt the blood drain from my face. He was truly angry. Not like when he was violent, or annoyed. True anger. It didn't stem from ill will, so it had to be something else. Perhaps disgust. No, that wasn't right. He would have left me on my own, had that been it. Maybe he was disappointed in me. No, that wouldn't cause such anger. But that only left-
Fear?
I looked down at him. His jaw was tight, lips drawn thin. His eyes flashed between rage and some nameless emotion. My arm lay across his shoulders, and I could feel the tension that knotted his muscles. He was afraid. Or something akin to it.
We reached my home shortly after two. I barely made it up the stairs, even with Hiei's help. My ankle was really starting to throb, but my head felt clear for the first time in what seemed like weeks.
Hiei deposited me none too gently on my bed, and ordered me to stay put in a voice that sent chills down my spine. He was no less angry with me than he had been. I watched as he walked over to my closet and took a first aid kit from the shelf. After going to the linen closet and grabbing an old towel, he sat on the carpet at my feet.
He spread the towel out on the floor, then unwrapped my ankle. The blood was still bright red. It hadn't quite stopped yet.
Hiei opened the first aid kit, taking out a few packages of alcohol wipes. I bit my lip as he opened one and began to clean and disinfect the wound. The pain shot through me. I gritted my teeth. I had borne much worse. And I heal quickly. I would be fine.
After most of the blood was removed, I looked down at it. The scratch was deep, cutting to the bone of my ankle. It stretched from the left side of the ankle on my left foot, around the front, and up the side of my calf, ending about halfway to my knee. It was only serious for about half the length, which I was grateful for.
Hiei finished cleaning it and fished around in the kit for some clean white bandages. After a moment, he found a roll of gauze and proceeded to wrap the wound, expertly pulling it tight to keep the pressure on it. When he finished, he tidied things up, slinging the unsoiled towel over the back of a chair.
I stared at him, dully realizing that I had no idea what to expect. Finally, he turned back to me, legs spread in an aggressive stance, and crossed his arms over his chest. His voice was like his katana, sharp and deadly.
"What gives you the right to make me feel like this?"
I flinched. "I-"
"Let me finish." He looked at me angrily. "What gives you the right to preach to me about ningen feelings," he said it as if it were something distasteful, " and then when I open up to you, to become angry with me?" He turned away from me, walked to the open window. I remained silent, sensing he had more to say.
I was right.
"Kurama," he began, turning around to regard me from across the room, "when I first met you, I thought you would be cold and cruel. The famous Youko Kurama, renowned thief of the Makai. I thought you would be an asset, the perfect partner for the crime." His smile was ironic. "When I saw you, I nearly didn't want to go through with it. You were perfect. Beautiful. I wanted to know you. Not just as an associate, but as something more. Why do you think I was so cruel toward you? I knew that if anyone could break through the shell I had erected around myself, it would be you."
He removed his cloak and katana, setting them neatly on top of my desk.
"When I realized that, I had to close myself off even tighter. I could not afford anything getting in the way of my search for Yukina. That was all that mattered. I knew that if I let myself know you, suddenly it wouldn't just be about Yukina anymore. You were so kind to everyone I saw you interact with. I knew that if we became close, I wouldn't be able to search for her with the same intensity."
His eyes met mine, solemn and angry.
"When I was alone, it didn't matter as much if I died looking for her. After all, she didn't know about me. She couldn't be hurt by the death of a brother she didn't know existed. But, you. If I died, I knew you could be hurt. I wasn't willing to risk that. I couldn't. And yet, it didn't matter, did it? Yukina's safe, and here I am making a fool out of myself over some stupid fox who can't even figure himself out!"
His voice has raised to shouting level. I cringed. His hands were back at his sides, fists clenched. He wasn't really looking at me. His gaze went over my head, at the wall behind me.
"For all that I'm supposed to be the one who doesn't feel things, I can at least admit to myself that there is something between us! You! You close it off, worry about it, analyze it, pretend it's something else, warp it out of all recognition until you don't know what it was that was there in the first place! You go over it in your mind until you're so obsessed with it that you can't change it. You cling to the emotion, the turmoil, the pain of not knowing, because you're so afraid that once you acknowledge it and take action on it, it won't be there anymore. You're afraid it will change. For all your years with ningens, you still aren't used to the emotions. You still think that if it changes, it's different. Not better! Not worse! All you register is that it's gone!"
He walked toward me, angrily. He stopped a few feet away, looking down slightly into my eyes. I was shocked. I could feel tears well at the corners of my eyes, then felt them overflow, spill down my cheeks. The pain was acute. He was right. I had caused everything. It was my own fault. I had been to afraid to let things progress as they should have. Therefore, I had tried to change it, to make it something I could define, handle, keep in a little box. I closed my eyes. Damn it, he was right!
Hands on my shoulders made me gasp. I kept my eyes squeezed shut, afraid that if I opened them, he wouldn't be there any more. One hand moved, sliding into my hair and tightening into a fist, forcing me to tilt my chin up. I shivered as the other hand wiped the tears from my cheeks, rough, callused fingers smoothing over my skin. I dared not open my eyes.
Soft lips crushed against my own as the hand in my hair tightened. The hand that had been touching my cheek slid around my shoulders, tightening, pulling me against him. His mouth moved over mine, demanding and harsh. I was pliant, yielding. My mouth opened under his, and the kiss deepened.
Slipping directly from shock into desire, I lifted my arms to his waist, tightening them as he broke the kiss. He pulled my head back further, baring my throat. I opened my eyes briefly, meeting his. They were filled with a wild determination. I opened my mouth to speak. He cut me off.
"Don't say anything. Baka. Don't you think I know that if I let you think, you'll close up on me again? You get no say until I'm done with you."
I opened my mouth again, to protest, but his mouth on my neck drove all thought from my mind, and a small moan escaped my lips. I shivered. My senses reeled.
I had never before realized how very easy it was to go from desperation and hysteria to blind desire. I shuddered. Fear tried to surface again. Then Hiei's hands were sliding under my shirt, touching my stomach, my back, my chest. He drew the garment up, over my head, and pushed me back. My body hit the mattress, and he followed, one knee on either side of my hips, holding me captive.
I was shaking. "Hiei-"
He smiled slowly, sensually. His voice, when he spoke, was husky, deepened with desire. "I already told you. Don't think. Feel." He lowered his head and nipped at my collarbone. I shivered, wanting. His body hovered above mine. Then he kissed me again, deep and demanding, pressing himself against me, and all thought deserted me for quite some time.
* * * * *
Thankfully Shiori works long hours. Neither of us noticed the time until we woke up, having dozed for a couple of hours. I blushed, thinking of what had transpired. Happily, I noticed one arm wrapped around my waist. I felt Hiei's breathing on the back of my neck.
I started to turn. The arm tightened.
"Hn. Did you have to move?" Hiei spoke into my ear, sounding for all the world like a querulous child having been woken up too early. I laughed, turning the rest of the way, and propping myself up on one elbow. Hiei sat up, leaning against the headboard. He surveyed the room. "Messy, weren't we?"
I glanced around. Clothing was strewn everywhere. "Oh, well." I yawned.
When I looked back at him, his eyes were serious. "Kurama, I don't want this to be forced for you."
I looked at him in bewilderment. "Forced?"
He nodded. "I want you to be comfortable with our relationship progressing to this level."
I smiled. "Hiei, I wanted it as much as you did. I was just," I paused, "afraid."
He looked at me, crimson eyes betraying nothing. "Are you still?"
I shook my head.
He nodded. "Good."
I glanced at the clock. There was still another hour before Shiori came home. Rising, I walked toward the bathroom.
Hiei watched me. "Where are you going?"
I cast a glance back over my shoulder. "Shower." I kept walking.
I didn't see him move, but I wasn't surprised when a pair of arms slid around me from behind as I stepped into the shower. I could feel him lean his cheek against my shoulder as the water streamed over us. Silently, I washed my hair, turning to blow bubbles at him from my hand.
He blinked at me, eyes wide and surprised.
I smiled and turned back around. "I love that expression." I lowered my voice. "And you."
He tensed, but it quickly passed. He waited for me to rinse the soap from my hair. Then he bit down on the back of my neck. I gasped.
He chuckled. "I love that noise." His voice was quiet, but forceful. "And you, too, kitsune."
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It's all over! *Cries* Hope you liked it!