a/n-this isn't as funny as some others-be warned, it's downright bizarre. I just wrote it to avoid doing math...you should probably seek entertainment elsewhere...
ARTEMIS: tr.v. kip·pered, kip·per·ing, kip·pers
To prepare (fish) by splitting, salting, and smoking.
I rest my case.
LUNA: good, becouse that topic is getting boring. and thats gross. anyway, to introduce todays topic, I have been forced to start a new storyline because Holly kept LOUDLY protesting to my previous masterpiece.
HOLLY: it STUNK, to keep this G-rated.
ARTEMIS: if i remeber correctly, Luna, she had you in a headlock and refused to let you go untill you signed that contract saying to write something else.
LUNA: be quiet, Artemis. *everyone looks at her* hey, can I help it if she's a LEP officer and I'm just a computer addict??
HOLLY: yes.
LUNA: WHY?? why did I decide to write AF fics?? why couldn't I have chosen Harry Potter??
HOLLY: good question, excellent question, brilliant question.
LUNA: I. am. going. to. write. this. fic. now, so BE QUIET!
JULIET: touche.
LUNA: Artemis awoke with a start. he was in front of his computer. again. he glanced at the clock on the desk. three AM. he groaned and straigtened up. his answering machine was blinking and he hit the 'play message' button.
"Fowl. Artemis Fowl."
the voice echoed from the machine, strangely eerie.
"We had a deal, you and I. you don't want to break it off, now do you?" the voice purred. it was a low voice, but definatly female. she sounded to be about his age.
"Call me by 6 AM. Juniper Blair, you know my number."
click, and dial tone. Artemis, deciding to ignore the message for now, turned back to his computer.
ARTMSFWL2 ,
JBcat2100 has sent you a message. do you wich to accept?
YES NO
Artemis, not sure who this was, clicked YES.
JBcat2100: Hello, Artemis.
ARTMSFWL2: Who are you, and what do you want?
while who ever it was replied, Artemis was running a search on the persons screenname.
JBcat2100: You should learn the answers to both questions when you finish searching for information on me.
ARTEMIS: only his fine training kept him from cursing. this was another one of those knows-everything-about-the-plot people.
LUNA: be quiet, I'm trying to finish.
JULIET: I'm bored, and so is Holly. we're outta here.
ARTEMIS: wait up!
LUNA: nooo!!! come back!! this story had potential!!
BUTLER: curse you.
*Luna dejectedly leaves the computer and starts bawling.*
LUNA: I'll get you for this! as god as my witness, I shall seek REVENGE!!!!
a/n-I warned you, but you didn't listen, now did you??
********
that was a good closing line, so pretend it ends there. I just wanted to say that since you battled your way through this, you may as well flame, right?
ARTEMIS: tr.v. kip·pered, kip·per·ing, kip·pers
To prepare (fish) by splitting, salting, and smoking.
I rest my case.
LUNA: good, becouse that topic is getting boring. and thats gross. anyway, to introduce todays topic, I have been forced to start a new storyline because Holly kept LOUDLY protesting to my previous masterpiece.
HOLLY: it STUNK, to keep this G-rated.
ARTEMIS: if i remeber correctly, Luna, she had you in a headlock and refused to let you go untill you signed that contract saying to write something else.
LUNA: be quiet, Artemis. *everyone looks at her* hey, can I help it if she's a LEP officer and I'm just a computer addict??
HOLLY: yes.
LUNA: WHY?? why did I decide to write AF fics?? why couldn't I have chosen Harry Potter??
HOLLY: good question, excellent question, brilliant question.
LUNA: I. am. going. to. write. this. fic. now, so BE QUIET!
JULIET: touche.
LUNA: Artemis awoke with a start. he was in front of his computer. again. he glanced at the clock on the desk. three AM. he groaned and straigtened up. his answering machine was blinking and he hit the 'play message' button.
"Fowl. Artemis Fowl."
the voice echoed from the machine, strangely eerie.
"We had a deal, you and I. you don't want to break it off, now do you?" the voice purred. it was a low voice, but definatly female. she sounded to be about his age.
"Call me by 6 AM. Juniper Blair, you know my number."
click, and dial tone. Artemis, deciding to ignore the message for now, turned back to his computer.
ARTMSFWL2 ,
JBcat2100 has sent you a message. do you wich to accept?
YES NO
Artemis, not sure who this was, clicked YES.
JBcat2100: Hello, Artemis.
ARTMSFWL2: Who are you, and what do you want?
while who ever it was replied, Artemis was running a search on the persons screenname.
JBcat2100: You should learn the answers to both questions when you finish searching for information on me.
ARTEMIS: only his fine training kept him from cursing. this was another one of those knows-everything-about-the-plot people.
LUNA: be quiet, I'm trying to finish.
JULIET: I'm bored, and so is Holly. we're outta here.
ARTEMIS: wait up!
LUNA: nooo!!! come back!! this story had potential!!
BUTLER: curse you.
*Luna dejectedly leaves the computer and starts bawling.*
LUNA: I'll get you for this! as god as my witness, I shall seek REVENGE!!!!
a/n-I warned you, but you didn't listen, now did you??
********
that was a good closing line, so pretend it ends there. I just wanted to say that since you battled your way through this, you may as well flame, right?