Pairing: Rory/Jess
Disclaimer: See last chapters
Author's note: This chapter's purpose is to show that Rory doesn't automatically run to Jess after Dean. I think in a lot of fics it is just like "hey Dean and I broke up five min. ago, let's hook-up" and I think it just sucks. I didn't even like how they got together on the show. Anyways, Rory is pining for Jess and Lane is there for her.
"Just pick something. I don't care at this point."
"I need you to clarify Rory. Do you want wallow in sadness music or cheer me up music?"
"Whatever."
"I am going to have to take that as wallow in sadness."
"Fine, so what is wallow in sadness?"
"Wait I got it." Rory watched Lane put on another CD. She had been doing this for over a half hour. Lane thought the perfect music would soothe Rory. So far they had listened to Coldplay, Weezer, Bowie, Red Hot Chili Peppers, and one track off Eminem's new album. Rory was tired of talking about music. It didn't really matter that much to her anyway.
Rory listened to the gentle guitar strings started and looked at Lane sitting next to her with a triumphant smile on her face. Rory recognized the music and she smiled back.
"Simon and Garfunkle. Good choice."
"But is it perfect?"
"Perfect. Really. This will be on the soundtrack of my life."
"Good."
They sat in silence. Rory forgot that the subject of music had distracted them from everything else. From Dean. From Jess. From her heart which hurt very much. Lane was searching for a subject but couldn't come up with anything.
"So.how long until you see Jess again? Are you guys a couple now?" Lane thought they might as well talk about what was both on their minds.
"The answer to both of those questions is I don't know." Now that she was not with Dean, did that make her automatically with Jess? Nothing had been said explicitly, just implied. The last time she had seen Jess was on the bridge. She blushed just thinking about it.
"Do you think you and Dean will be friends?" Lane couldn't fathom life without Dean. For two years he had been in every conversation they had almost. Except lately, except when Jess came.
"I doubt it. At least not for a while. He was so mad." Rory leaned back on the pillows on her bed and hugged a pillow to her chest.
"What did he say exactly?" Lane sat on the edge of the bed and stared at Rory. She was having trouble getting Rory to open up to her. Why wouldn't Rory just say how the break-up happened, she wondered.
"Well I told him we had been growing apart for a while and that it was time for a break. And that I was sorry. Then he.he exploded." Rory wished Lane wouldn't press it; she didn't want to talk about it. She just wanted to forget it ever happened.
"Dean? Exploded?" Lane couldn't believe it. She had only seen Dean mad once, ever. It was so unlike him.
"He started yelling that what I said was a lie. He kept saying over and over 'Just tell me the truth! Just tell me the truth!' And then he brought up Jess. And I couldn't lie to him. So then he got angrier and I.kept saying 'I'm sorry' because I didn't know what else to say." Rory took a breath and held the pillow tighter. "Then he asked me to leave. And I left."
"Rory I am so sorry." Lane didn't know what else to say. She had never gone through an intense break-up because she had never had an intense relationship.
"I am not the one to say sorry to. I am the one who broke his heart. I am the one who fell in love with someone else. I am the one who kissed someone else. It is my fault. Mine." Tears fell down Rory's face and she wiped them away.
"Rory we are young. We are supposed to fall in and out of love. You know that no one liked you and Dean together more than I did. But did you really think that you would be with him forever?" Sometimes Rory was such a little girl, thought Lane.
"I just feel like I didn't deserve him. He was so nice to me. He did everything right and I." More tears falling.
"Of course you did. Don't think like that." Lane hugged Rory as she cried softly. "I know it hurts right now but it will get better."
"I mean you think that I would have cried enough lately. I never knew that there was an endless capacity for tears." Rory pulled away and grabbed the tissues and began dabbing the tears.
"It has been an intense week. Hasn't it?"
"To say the least." An image of her grandpa lying on the floor flashed across Rory's mind.
"All I can think of right now is that really used saying 'When it rains it pours. And I don't even like that saying. My uncle Andrew says it all the time. And he says it for situations that don't even apply." Rory smiled because she had met Lane's uncle Andrew.
"I've met your uncle Andrew and I think I remember him saying that."
"Like one time, he said it when it was really raining outside." Rory laughed softly. And she thought the sound was strange. It had been a while since she laughed. They sat there both staring at each other. "America" began to play, and they both concentrated on the music.
"This really was a good choice Lane." The tune was soothing for Rory. Their voices, together in unison were beautiful. Rory especially loved it when they hummed. It was peaceful in an unexplainable way.
"Yeah well it was a no-brainer. I mean c'mon Simon and Garfunkle. Classic." Lane was making light of her earlier frenzy to find the perfect music for Rory. For her friend who was in pain. To Lane, music was not insignificant, it was powerful and she knew that moments and people's actions were shaped by it. At that moment Rory had found some peace of mind partly from a good friend, and partly because of the tranquil effect of the music. Lane was happy to give that to her.
"Better than Eminem. That's for sure." Not that Rory didn't like Eminem. She respected his music and his talent, but he was not what she was in the mood to hear after ending a two year relationship hours earlier.
"Sorry about that."
"All is forgiven." Rory smiled and then glanced at the clock. It was late, Lane would get in trouble. "Hey, weren't you supposed to be home ten minutes ago?" Rory didn't want Lane in trouble.
"Yeah, but it's no biggie." Lane was very aware of the time.
"No biggie? Mamma Kim is going to skin you alive."
"Okay that was graphic."
"Lane you don't have to baby-sit me. I am fine and besides my mom is going to be home any minute."
"Are you sure?" Lane looked Rory in the eye.
"Positive."
"Good because I can make it home in a minute and a half and then I will only be 13 minutes late and I can just tell my mom that we were watching 'The Ten Commandments' and didn't want to finish it early because we were so caught up in it."
"Bye."
"Bye. Call me tomorrow."
Rory heard the door shut and knew she was alone. After some deliberation she decided to take a bath. In movies and TV shows, women always took long baths with bubbles and candles to calm their nerves. Rory had never took a bath with all that stuff but decided that now was good as time as any to try it.
Rory gathered candles from around the house and lit them in the bathroom. She turned the water on hotter than she normally would and poured the bubbles in. She was about to shed her clothes when she remembered that women were always reading something when they took their baths.
Rory went to her book shelf and grabbed Oliver Twist. Within the pages tucked away were the two letters that Jess had written her. She took her clothes off slowly and winced from the heat of the water. But it felt good. Rory smiled upon realization that she was a cliché. Girl alone on a Friday night, taking a bath with candles.
Rory took the letters out of the book. Now these aren't a cliché, she told herself. She reread the words and imagined Jess writing them. His face bent in concentration. his fingers holding the pen in his hand.
She touched her lips thinking about her last encounter with Jess. The weight of his body on top of her. Gasping for air. His lips on her neck. It all started with simple hand-holding. That's all it took.
Rory imagined Jess with her now.
Rory used to think that she would never be able to let a boy see her naked because she was so self-conscious, but now she wasn't so sure. It didn't seem such a foreign concept. There was never this passion with Dean. But everything was changed now. And it wasn't just Jess. It was her.
Disclaimer: See last chapters
Author's note: This chapter's purpose is to show that Rory doesn't automatically run to Jess after Dean. I think in a lot of fics it is just like "hey Dean and I broke up five min. ago, let's hook-up" and I think it just sucks. I didn't even like how they got together on the show. Anyways, Rory is pining for Jess and Lane is there for her.
"Just pick something. I don't care at this point."
"I need you to clarify Rory. Do you want wallow in sadness music or cheer me up music?"
"Whatever."
"I am going to have to take that as wallow in sadness."
"Fine, so what is wallow in sadness?"
"Wait I got it." Rory watched Lane put on another CD. She had been doing this for over a half hour. Lane thought the perfect music would soothe Rory. So far they had listened to Coldplay, Weezer, Bowie, Red Hot Chili Peppers, and one track off Eminem's new album. Rory was tired of talking about music. It didn't really matter that much to her anyway.
Rory listened to the gentle guitar strings started and looked at Lane sitting next to her with a triumphant smile on her face. Rory recognized the music and she smiled back.
"Simon and Garfunkle. Good choice."
"But is it perfect?"
"Perfect. Really. This will be on the soundtrack of my life."
"Good."
They sat in silence. Rory forgot that the subject of music had distracted them from everything else. From Dean. From Jess. From her heart which hurt very much. Lane was searching for a subject but couldn't come up with anything.
"So.how long until you see Jess again? Are you guys a couple now?" Lane thought they might as well talk about what was both on their minds.
"The answer to both of those questions is I don't know." Now that she was not with Dean, did that make her automatically with Jess? Nothing had been said explicitly, just implied. The last time she had seen Jess was on the bridge. She blushed just thinking about it.
"Do you think you and Dean will be friends?" Lane couldn't fathom life without Dean. For two years he had been in every conversation they had almost. Except lately, except when Jess came.
"I doubt it. At least not for a while. He was so mad." Rory leaned back on the pillows on her bed and hugged a pillow to her chest.
"What did he say exactly?" Lane sat on the edge of the bed and stared at Rory. She was having trouble getting Rory to open up to her. Why wouldn't Rory just say how the break-up happened, she wondered.
"Well I told him we had been growing apart for a while and that it was time for a break. And that I was sorry. Then he.he exploded." Rory wished Lane wouldn't press it; she didn't want to talk about it. She just wanted to forget it ever happened.
"Dean? Exploded?" Lane couldn't believe it. She had only seen Dean mad once, ever. It was so unlike him.
"He started yelling that what I said was a lie. He kept saying over and over 'Just tell me the truth! Just tell me the truth!' And then he brought up Jess. And I couldn't lie to him. So then he got angrier and I.kept saying 'I'm sorry' because I didn't know what else to say." Rory took a breath and held the pillow tighter. "Then he asked me to leave. And I left."
"Rory I am so sorry." Lane didn't know what else to say. She had never gone through an intense break-up because she had never had an intense relationship.
"I am not the one to say sorry to. I am the one who broke his heart. I am the one who fell in love with someone else. I am the one who kissed someone else. It is my fault. Mine." Tears fell down Rory's face and she wiped them away.
"Rory we are young. We are supposed to fall in and out of love. You know that no one liked you and Dean together more than I did. But did you really think that you would be with him forever?" Sometimes Rory was such a little girl, thought Lane.
"I just feel like I didn't deserve him. He was so nice to me. He did everything right and I." More tears falling.
"Of course you did. Don't think like that." Lane hugged Rory as she cried softly. "I know it hurts right now but it will get better."
"I mean you think that I would have cried enough lately. I never knew that there was an endless capacity for tears." Rory pulled away and grabbed the tissues and began dabbing the tears.
"It has been an intense week. Hasn't it?"
"To say the least." An image of her grandpa lying on the floor flashed across Rory's mind.
"All I can think of right now is that really used saying 'When it rains it pours. And I don't even like that saying. My uncle Andrew says it all the time. And he says it for situations that don't even apply." Rory smiled because she had met Lane's uncle Andrew.
"I've met your uncle Andrew and I think I remember him saying that."
"Like one time, he said it when it was really raining outside." Rory laughed softly. And she thought the sound was strange. It had been a while since she laughed. They sat there both staring at each other. "America" began to play, and they both concentrated on the music.
"This really was a good choice Lane." The tune was soothing for Rory. Their voices, together in unison were beautiful. Rory especially loved it when they hummed. It was peaceful in an unexplainable way.
"Yeah well it was a no-brainer. I mean c'mon Simon and Garfunkle. Classic." Lane was making light of her earlier frenzy to find the perfect music for Rory. For her friend who was in pain. To Lane, music was not insignificant, it was powerful and she knew that moments and people's actions were shaped by it. At that moment Rory had found some peace of mind partly from a good friend, and partly because of the tranquil effect of the music. Lane was happy to give that to her.
"Better than Eminem. That's for sure." Not that Rory didn't like Eminem. She respected his music and his talent, but he was not what she was in the mood to hear after ending a two year relationship hours earlier.
"Sorry about that."
"All is forgiven." Rory smiled and then glanced at the clock. It was late, Lane would get in trouble. "Hey, weren't you supposed to be home ten minutes ago?" Rory didn't want Lane in trouble.
"Yeah, but it's no biggie." Lane was very aware of the time.
"No biggie? Mamma Kim is going to skin you alive."
"Okay that was graphic."
"Lane you don't have to baby-sit me. I am fine and besides my mom is going to be home any minute."
"Are you sure?" Lane looked Rory in the eye.
"Positive."
"Good because I can make it home in a minute and a half and then I will only be 13 minutes late and I can just tell my mom that we were watching 'The Ten Commandments' and didn't want to finish it early because we were so caught up in it."
"Bye."
"Bye. Call me tomorrow."
Rory heard the door shut and knew she was alone. After some deliberation she decided to take a bath. In movies and TV shows, women always took long baths with bubbles and candles to calm their nerves. Rory had never took a bath with all that stuff but decided that now was good as time as any to try it.
Rory gathered candles from around the house and lit them in the bathroom. She turned the water on hotter than she normally would and poured the bubbles in. She was about to shed her clothes when she remembered that women were always reading something when they took their baths.
Rory went to her book shelf and grabbed Oliver Twist. Within the pages tucked away were the two letters that Jess had written her. She took her clothes off slowly and winced from the heat of the water. But it felt good. Rory smiled upon realization that she was a cliché. Girl alone on a Friday night, taking a bath with candles.
Rory took the letters out of the book. Now these aren't a cliché, she told herself. She reread the words and imagined Jess writing them. His face bent in concentration. his fingers holding the pen in his hand.
She touched her lips thinking about her last encounter with Jess. The weight of his body on top of her. Gasping for air. His lips on her neck. It all started with simple hand-holding. That's all it took.
Rory imagined Jess with her now.
Rory used to think that she would never be able to let a boy see her naked because she was so self-conscious, but now she wasn't so sure. It didn't seem such a foreign concept. There was never this passion with Dean. But everything was changed now. And it wasn't just Jess. It was her.