Catastrophe
by
Princess McPhee
Disclaimer: I don't claim. Not mine. Bow to Joss Whedon.
Author's Note: Feedback may decide whether I finish this, so please tell me if you loved it, hated it, or somewhere in between!
Summary: An AU version of the events after 'The Weight of the World.'
Rating: PG, so far.
Everyone looked around the room at the others. As Gunn threw up his hands and said that there was no way he was getting involved, Wesley swayed in his seat and muttered, "I'm in."
"You're drunk."
"Yeah, well, I'm allowed tuh be. I'm ahn a-adult, rhmember, Angel?"
Angel shrugged, not really caring what dirty little secrets Wesley might reveal to the group. He was more concerned with what Wes might do to him in the morning if he found out his former boss hadn't even tried to stop him. Now that he'd tried, his duty was over. "Okay."
Buffy, looking a little panicky, shook her head quickly. "No! Not okay! Very not okay!"
Spike leered in her direction. "Well, shall we see about that, pet?" He looked around the table, taking a headcount. "Let's see. There's seven of us, and that's Wes, Cordy, Dawn's and my vote. Yah! That's more than half, Slayer. Let's play!"
"This isn't a democracy, Spike. Just because you get four votes doesn't mean we all have to play the game."
Spike pouted. "You'd really want to ruin everyone's fun like that?" The glare on Buffy's face told him he didn't really want to know what she thought about everyone's fun, if it involved truth or dare. He sighed. "Tell you what. The Bit, the Watcher, the Seer and I will all play, and if you three party-bums don't want to play, you don't have to." He grabbed Dawn's chair, and wheeled her out of the room. She didn't complain. A very drunk Wesley and an only slightly tipsy Cordelia followed him.
For long moments, the other three sat around the table, staring at each other silently. Then Gunn sighed, picked himself up from the table and walked resignedly towards the sounds of laughter from the lobby. Buffy and Angel exchanged glances, and followed.
When they were all settled in the chairs Spike, Cordy and Wesley had dragged in, Buffy stood up to list off the rules. "First rule is, keep it to a PG-13 level. Dawn's here."
Dawn groaned. "Buffy! For god's sake, I go see R-rated movies all the time. It's not like I don't know stuff."
Buffy looked over at her. "PG-13. That's not negotiable." Dawn sat back in her chair and pouted, but didn't speak anymore.
"Next. Dares cannot involve anything dangerous, and nothing that takes all night."
Everyone nodded, more or less sober enough to follow the fairly simple idea, and Buffy eased her body back into her seat.
Spike clapped his hands together and looked around the group. "Alright then, who's first?"
When no one volunteered, he nodded. "Okay then. I'll go first." His eyes wandered around the room, and settled on his likely victims one by one, making them squirm with his unrelenting gaze.
Internally, he was having a mental battle. He really wanted to ask Buffy something pressingly uncomfortable that she wouldn't reveal if she wasn't drunk, but he also wasn't sure how long she'd stick around if he pressed the issue. But his grand-sire... now there was someone he could probably torture for a long while before Ol' Broody got up and left. He'd probably think he deserved it, or something ridiculous like that. He grinned, and Angel groaned.
"Angelus..."
Angel closed his eyes, and looked at the ceiling. "Let's just get this over with, Spike."
Spike rubbed his hands. "Okay. Truth or dare, Angelus?"
Angel sighed, and then met his grand-childe's eyes. "Truth."
The younger vamp grinned even harder, making his face hurt. "When was the last time you drank human blood from a living person?"
Angel looked at his hands and didn't answer for a long time. Then, quietly, he answered. "A long time ago, when I did it for pleasure alone."
"That wasn't what I asked, Peaches."
Angel looked around the room, studiously avoiding everyone's gaze. "About six months ago."
Spike crowed. "That's great! That's bloody great! My poofy fruit of a grand-sire drank human blood more recently than I did." He grinned, staring down Angel. "On second thought, though, I'm slightly jealous." He pouted, like a small child, then perked up instantly. "Oh, well. We'd better get on with this." His grin returned full-force. "Peaches, it's your turn."
Angel looked around the room, trying to go for someone safe, someone whom he could ask something safe. But there was no one in the room with whom he didn't share some tremendous, rather bloody history, except Dawn.
Eyes resting on the little fourteen-year-old, Angel prayed this would be easy and relatively painless. "Dawn," He asked. "Truth or dare?"
She stared right back at him, and smirked a little, oddly reminiscent of Spike. "Dare," She replied boldly.
Angel blinked. He hadn't been expecting that. "Um..."
Dawn waited.
"I dare you to... I dare you to paint Spike's fingernails orange." He grinned. This was wonderful. Getting back at Spike, and managing to find a fairly safe dare for the youngest member of the group.
Dawn rolled her eyes, then pulled something from below the seat of the wheelchair. Fishing through it, she found what she was looking for, and wheeled her chair triumphantly over to where the somewhat-cowering vampire sat, waiting.
"Niblet... this really isn't necessary..."
Dawn looked at him with the same look her mother had fixed her with more times than she could remember. "Yes, it is." Across the room, Cordelia piped up.
"I totally agree. We're playing a game you suggested, by the rules you and Buffy outlined, I think this is the least that's necessary." Dawn smirked at Spike as she heard this, reminding him of what Angel had seen in the teenager just moments ago, unbeknownst to either vampire.
Slathering the polish on rather messily, Dawn put the gaudiest shade of orange that was in the hotel between her, Buffy and Cordelia, on the younger vampire's nails. He glared at her as she finished, a happy smile on her face, and she rolled back to where she'd been sitting before. "Now, can we have some real dirt? This 'walk-around-people's-feelings' stuff is getting boring. And Angel?" She turned to the older vampire, "That was a really lame dare."
Angel shrugged. "Sorry."
Dawn smiled. "No harm done. Especially since it's my turn." She licked her lips and rubbed her hands in a terrible imitation of what Spike had done earlier, and looked around the room, trying to select her prey.
Eventually her eyes settled on Cordelia. Curious, she decided that she might as well ask her question, that was what the game was about, wasn't it? "Cordy, truth or dare?"
Cordelia sat up, ready to face the challenge head on, having realized from Angel's mistake that Dawn was neither going to take it easy on them, nor let them play gently with her. "Truth."
"What was the most outrageous thing you did in high school?"
"On the high school campus, or just those years?"
"Just those years."
The former cheerleader sat back in her seat, thinking for a moment. "I'm not sure. Dating Xander was pretty crazy. And joining the Scoobies was kind of outrageous, too. But I'm guessing those don't count." She looked over at Dawn, who shook her head. "Then, I'm not really sure. I think it might have been making out with Xander in a broom closet with Snyder like, six yards away."
Buffy gasped. "That's crazy!"
Cordy grinned. "What can I say? I had my moments of insanity. It's your fault. After all, who wouldn't go insane after belonging to a group of kids who fights demons as a hobby, for long enough?"
Buffy shrugged. "I thought we turned out well enough."
"Yeah? Look at us. We're kind of pathetic."
"We are not!"
The game deteriorated from there.
"That's not PG-13!"
"Yes it is. I asked who was the first person Spike slept with, not what position he used!" Angel was getting a little irate, though he didn't know quite why. It wasn't really important to him who his grand-childe had lost his virginity to, was it? But for some reason, he wanted to know the answer. Maybe because this was his first chance to catch up with his progeny in a hundred years.
Or maybe it was just because of all the tension that automatically piled up when he and Buffy argued. About anything. That could have something to do with it.
"Angel!"
"If he'd just answer the damn question, we wouldn't have to do this!"
Dawn looked from one adult to another, a half-grin on her face. She didn't want to smile too wide, that would catch the attention of her fellow truth-or-dare players. But she was certainly enjoying herself. "Uh, guys?"
Everyone's attention snapped to her. She grinned harder. "This is kind of getting off the subject. Now, I think that if Spike just answers the question, then we could move on, okay? Buffy, it's not like I don't know what you guys are talking about."
Buffy nodded reluctantly, and Angel turned his gaze back to his estranged grand-childe. "So?" He inquired.
Spike squirmed in his chair, looking oddly recalcitrant. "I think I like the idea of a dare, Peaches."
Angel wasn't about to give in, though. "Nuh-uh. You asked for the truth, you're going to give the truth."
Spike looked down at his feet, and uncharacteristically muttered, "Dru."
"Sorry, I couldn't hear you?" Angel had heard the vampire perfectly, but he knew that the others might not have, and he wanted everyone to revel in the humiliation of his grand-childe.
"Dru!" He repeated. "There! Happy, Poofter? Now everybody in this room knows that I was a bloody loser 'til your crazy childe turned me. Was that the idea?"
Angel smiled. "Pretty much. But look on the bright side. It's your turn."
"Bloody good bright side," Spike replied sarcastically, but he was already looking around, trying to pick his next victim. "Niblet. I think you've been a while without a turn. How's about it?"
Dawn shrugged. "Sure. Truth, I guess."
"I didn't even ask the bleeding question yet!"
Dawn rolled her eyes. "There's only two answers, Spike. And I know what the question is. So. Truth. Whadda ya have to ask?"
Spike shrugged. "Dunno."
Dawn sighed and rolled her eyes again, theatrically. "Then why'd you ask me anyway?"
The vampire shrugged again. "'Cause I'm running out of things to ask anyone here." That wasn't true, but it was if he didn't want anyone to go storming off, or Buffy to end the game due to utter lack of PG-13 things to say.
"Well..." Dawn sat there, looking impatient, while the vampire tried to come up with something to ask.
"I admit it, Niblet. I'm bloody stumped. You can have your turn."
Dawn grinned, knowing just what she was going to ask, but quickly erased it, trying not to clue Spike in. "Spike..."
"No!"
Dawn smiled. "It's only fair. You said it could be my turn."
The vampire lolled his head back against the edge of his chair, and nodded, his eyes closed. "Al-bloody-right."
"Truth or dare?" She asked.
Spike cracked an eye open at her, and she looked up at him as innocently as possible, trying not to convey what she was about to ask. Apparently it worked, because the vampire closed his eye again, and exhaled easily. "Truth."
Dawn grinned. "How old were you when you lost your virginity to Dru?"
"Dawn!" Her sister accused.
"What?"
"That's not... that's not an appropriate question."
Dawn looked around the room, hoping to find support.
Angel shrugged, not wanting to take sides. But Cordy spoke up. "I agree. It's how old he was. Nothing bad about that, unless he was like, you know, twelve, and we already know he was incredibly old."
Spike's eyes shot open at this. "Hey!"
Cordy shrugged. "It's true, isn't it?"
The vampire couldn't deny that.
Dawn pressed on. "So?"
" 'So' what?"
" 'So' how old were you?" Dawn asked, mimicking him.
Spike threw his head back again, and groaned. "I was twenty-four," He admitted quietly.
Everyone stared at him. As if it hadn't been enough of a revelation that he'd been turned a virgin, now he was admitting to being possibly the world's oldest one, as far as the crew in the room was concerned. He opened his eyes and looked at them gawking, and exploded. "What? What the bloody hell does it matter how old I was? Why is everyone so obsessed with my sex life, anyway?"
Buffy, looking like she was in some kind of trance, pointing at Dawn to make it clear who she was speaking to, but still looking at the blond vampire said, "Now Dawnie, there's a good age to lose your virginity."
Dawn snorted. "Yeah, right. Little Miss Patron Saint Buffy, this is coming from. You forget that I covered for you several times. You were less than three years older than I am now."
Buffy looked over at her sister, trying to play the mom. "That doesn't mean it was smart."
Dawn shrugged. "Probably not. But then again, neither is sleeping with a cursed vampire, is it?"
Everyone recoiled a little, and Dawn looked at her handiwork with satisfaction. She'd successfully broken the fragile truce between Buffy and her two vampire suitors, and hopefully now, they'd have to talk.
And if they had to talk, they'd have to face their feelings.
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