Shadow of a Doubt
Chapter Fifteen: Lose Yourself
by Capella no da
A/N: Finally :) Another day, another chapter - I've decided that I really, really need some more slash-ness in here. For a slash story, it really doesn't have all that much.
Wow...162 reviews! *glomps reviewers* You guys are the greatest, honestly ^_^ You really know how to make a girl happy :D You know what would be REALLY cool? If I got to 180! I know, I know...only twenty more! Come on you guys, I'll do something *cool* in my next chapter if you do! ^_^
Next, thank you very much Thornangel for the nice email *beams* That sort of got me off my lazy bum to finish this chapter. So thank you!
I need to thank some more people real quick, since this is sort of the huge thank you note for all the chapter so far. I won't go through ALL my reviewers, but I do very much want to thank the people who review almost/every single chapter. So, to Pheonix, Kilohana, Thornangel, Aleydis, Gia2, Alchemy, Dark Hikari Kamiya, RJLL, Lady Bisenshi, Icefire, Basilisk, Silent Stalker, M14Mouse, and Sorceress Jade - the biggest thank you in the entire world. You guys were there since the VERY beginning, and I hope you'll be there til the bitter end. I don't know quite how to thank you guys enough so - I hope this'll do :)
And Verok - I thought about what you said, and I appreciate it and I see where you're coming from. The only thing is - as good of a writer as Tolkien was- I don't want to be him exactly. I want to write in my own style, though it can sound a little forced or choppy sometimes. It's the only way to get better, you know? I need to have my own voice in my writing, even if it's not as good as Tolkien's But thank you for the advice!
Lastly, to Sara...you just totally whammied me upside the head! *grins* Up until this point, I had honestly just forgotten about Voldemort. Woohoo, another reason for angst! And ya'll have Sara to thank for it *grins* By the way, those ideas are lovely, especially the staff thing. And I'd do some of that stuff but...well, you'll see. ^_~
Alright, I've seen other authors do this so I've decided to, also - I'm going to start a little mailing list thing. All you need to do is put your name down when you review or email me, and I'll put you on. Every time I update my story, I'll send you an email. If you want off, just tell me.
I'm really, really very sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. It won't happen again, i promise! I'm doing chapters within at least *2 weeks* of each other. PROMISE!
Review please! Because yesterday was my birthday! *grins*
____________________________
Look, if you had once shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted...one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?...
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow it
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime
-Eminem (yes, you heard me right, it just fit), "Lose Yourself"
____________________________
"We need to talk."
Harry's face had been lit by the slowly setting sun Legolas had found him sitting on a blackened stone away from everyone, his legs drawn up to his chest and his head on his knees. Now the Sickle of the Valar was high and bright in the darkened sky, only then did Legolas realize how long he'd been standing there. Harry's face was dark in the fading light but Legolas could make out the green glitter of his eyes behind his glasses and the stubborn set of his jaw. There was a long silence before Harry replied.
"What do you want?"
Legolas very nearly sighed. "I want to talk to you, Harry. Please."
There was a pause, then Harry's head turned toward Legolas and he motioned to the spot next to him. He turned back away once Legolas sat.
Now that he was so close to Harry, Legolas forgot his carefully worded speech that he had thought about all day and for a moment could only stare at Harry's beautiful profile, wanting to run his fingers through the thick black hair.
"Legolas. You wanted something."
It was more of a command than a question, and laced through the words was barely concealed impatience. All rational thought fled Legolas's head.
"By the Valar, Harry, what is the matter with you?" he said, and regretted the words the instant they left his mouth. They didn't produce quite the reaction he had expected, however.
"I'm fine. There's nothing wrong with me." He tugged on a black forelock that hung in his eyes, voice getting more and more hysterical. He added a whispered "we're both fine" almost as an afterthought. Legolas reached out a hand and touched Harry's cheek gently.
"Harry, what -"
"Who was -- is Ilmare?" Harry said abruptly, turning his eyes back down to his feet and leaning away from Legolas's hand. Unsurprised, Legolas turned Harry's head back toward him, looking Harry in the eyes and stroking his lower lip with a bow callused thumb.
"I have never been to the everlasting city of Valinor, but even I know who Ilmare is. She is the handmaiden of Varda, and it is said among my people that she is next to Varda in beauty and gentleness." Suddenly, Legolas frowned in thought, his thumb pausing in its rhythmic caress. "How is that you know of Ilmare?"
Harry's eyes looked scared now, cornered, like a spooked horse. He didn't seem to be able to pull his head away. "I...I heard Gandalf talking about her. Yesterday," he said hesitantly, his mouth moving whisper-soft against Legolas's fingers until he finally looked away.
Legolas said nothing, knowing the lie even as it came out of Harry's mouth. He let the overwhelming silence between them stretch on until Harry shifted under Legolas's hard gray gaze.
"I know who she is," Harry said softly, "and I know her like I'd know my own sister. I...today..." He trailed off, obviously struggling for words. "Christ! You heard me! I was standing there and all the sudden I wasn't me. It seemed like - like someone else just took over my body and my memories and my voice, because that wasn't me talking. I saw - all these people that I haven't ever met, but they seem so familiar to me...I feel like I've met and loved them all..." He worried his lower lip with even white teeth while looking terribly lost.
At that moment all the thoughts that Legolas was about to say flew from his mind, and raising Harry's head with a hand, he leaned in and pressed his lips gently to Harry's. When Harry didn't respond, Legolas opened his eyes to see Harry staring back at him with a dazed look on his face, and smiling softly Legolas leaned in for another kiss.
It wasn't anything like the tentative kisses of before; this one was slow and sweet as Legolas stole the breath from Harry's body. He could feel Harry's knees start to give out and he wound his arms around Harry's waist to hold him up. Harry broke away, eyes wide and scared.
"I can't -"
Legolas was suddenly more angry than he had ever been in his long life. "You can, Harry, what I believe you mean is that you will not. You are more frightened than I have ever seen you be, and that is why you are running away," he said vehemently. Harry opened his mouth, angry, to protest, but Legolas cut him off sharply. "You *are* running away. Do not try and tell me that you are not."
Harry narrowed his eyes and set his jaw, offence clearly in his tone. "I've got a lover, if I forgot to tell you." It was clearly said to sting, and it did.
"You believe you will ever go home?" Legolas shot back, feeling slightly guilty when Harry's face paled and his fists clenched until his knuckles went white.
"Shut up!" Harry yelled. "Just...shut up! I'm going to go home. I'm..." His voice choked up and he collapsed against Legolas's chest, pressing his face into Legolas's soft gray shirt with dry, heaving sobs tearing out of his throat. Tanned hands twisted in the thick fabric as Legolas stroked Harry's black hair gently.
"I want to go home." Harry whispered with heart-breaking simplicity, staring up at Legolas desperately and clutching Legolas's shirt closer like a lifeline. "Please."
Legolas surpressed a slight stab of irrational jealousy, wanting Harry to think of this as his home, wanting him to be the reason that Harry wanted to stay. Wanting nothing more than for love to keep Harry in Middle-earth.
"Make it go away."
Legolas started and stared down at Harry with surprise. Emerald eyes gazed up at Legolas and he saw no hesitation or remorse as Harry leaned up and placed a light kiss on his lips.
"Harry - are you sure -"
Harry smiled with a hint of smugness as he reached up and wrapped his arms around Legolas's neck, bringing the elf down to him. "Now who's running?" he whispered, and Legolas, entranced by the feel of Harry's lips moving against his own, was helpless to do anything but lean down and kiss him back. Legolas nibbled gently on Harry's full bottom lip in a wordless request and Harry complied, opening his mouth and letting the soft fulless of Legolas's tongue slip in. Little slivers of sensation began dancing their way up Legolas's spine, chills spreading over his body. Every part of him seemed oversensitized, and he was acutely aware of Harry's hands tangled in his hair.
Harry broke away panting for breath. "Is everyone asleep?" he murmered between great gulps for air.
"Yes, but -"
Smiling wickedly, Harry gently pushed Legolas down onto his back. "Good."
________________________
The next morning dawned grey and gloomy, the dark rainclouds hovering so close overhead that it almost seemed they were within reach. A strong wind had picked up in the middle of the night sometime, and Harry hugged his cloak tighter around his body, shivering.
He had woken that morning alone, which would have been an insult if he hadn't been aware of the escape of Saruman that Legolas was probably worried about. Hearing Merry and Pippin talk about it that morning, he had felt that strange feeling he had the day before, that maybe there was someone else sharing his body. It had passed nearly as soon as it had come over him.
During the night he'd had two more pain attacks.
They were getting closer together now, more violent and horrible. Harry shuddered and clutched his cloak, imagining that he was feeling the stirrings of fire in his stomach again. But he waited, and it passed, just the ghost of pain.
He was sitting on the black steps of Orthanc, looking at the bloody White Hand, when Gandalf came over to talk to him.
"Harry, are you all right?"
Harry let out a long-suffering sigh. This conversation seemed vaguely familiar somehow. "I'm fine, Gandalf, thanks," he said lightly, trying not to be rude because it really wasn't Gandalf's fault that Legolas had left him before he'd woken up. Which was, now that Harry thought about it, rather rude.
"You are sure?" Gandalf asked.
"Yes, I'm-"
The end of his sentance broke off in a gasp as he experianced the strange feeling that someone had reached a hand down his throat and squeezed all the air out of his lungs. He doubled over as soon as the first pang shot through him, from his toes to the top of his head. Fingers of pain were digging into his body viciously and Harry shut his eyes tightly, clutching his stomach. He was sure he was making the most embarrassing noises, but at the moment, nothing but the fiery pain running up and down his nerves mattered.
Sitting up became too much for his body to take, and he fell off the step onto the cold ground with his knees to his chest. He couldn't help the sharp cry that was torn from his throat as a particularly bad spike of pain shot through him. And, just like the other attacks, it stopped as suddenly as it had started.
"You are fine, are you." It wasn't a question. Harry opened his mouth to protest that yes, he was fine in fact, when Gandalf continued. "Do you know what it is I saw before you closed your eyes? They had a coating of silver."
Something in Gandalf's voice sounded strange, a little touch of sadness, but different than before. It was like a doctor about to announce a patient's uncurable disease. "You know what's wrong with me."
Gandalf sighed, face unreadable. "I do know what is wrong with you, young wizard. But I am not quite sure if I am correct. I am not willing to reveal anything right now to you, not until I have a more perfect understanding of what is happening to you."
"What kind of shit wisdom is that?" he demanded angrily, glaring at Gandalf. "If I'm going to die then just tell me, instead of letting me sit here and rot over it."
Gandalf didn't reply and looked troubled. Without another word, the wizard stood up and walked off in the general direction of Treebeard and the others. Harry attempted to glare a hole in the back of his head. He assumed the reason that it didn't work had something to do with the fact that he knew he'd forgotten something.
The feeling had been bothering him for a few days, the kind of feeling he got when he forgot to do some sort of homework but didn't remember what class it was for. Try as he might, whatever it was he forgot was gone.
Harry got up slowly from the stone steps, deciding to take a walk to see if he couldn't clear his head and maybe find Legolas in the process. However, while walking around camp and staring at the grey stratus overhead, he felt his foot catch on something and went sprawling over the rocky ground. One of his hands was skinned from the fall and he was sure from the spreading wetness that he had took some skin off his knee, too.
He twisted back around to see what he had tripped over and found himself staring at two pairs of sleepy, brown hobbit eyes.
"Isn't it a little late to be sleeping in, you two? And why in the world were you sleeping out here, instead of inside?" he asked absently. They were sleeping awfully close, under one blanket, and was Pippin wearing a shirt?
"We were about to get up! Just now!" Merry said, scrambling out of the blanket, pulling on his shirt that had been lying on the pack next to his made-up bed. "We just...didn't get the chance to go inside last night, is all." He sounded strangely defensive.
Harry shrugged and tried his best to blot the blood on his knee with a corner of his cloak. "Well, I think we're going soon, so when you two get ready find Gandalf." He stood back up and started walking away, toward Treebeard's towering form. Only as a curious afterthought did he turn around and see Merry and Pippin sharing in a sweet kiss. He shook his head.
"At least I'm not the only one," he murmered, laughing softly.
__________________________
A/N: (again)! Sorry guys, no lemon here. I decided not to put one in because a)-I'm determined to make this only PG-13, and b) I think they're banned anyways.
I hope you like it - I'm sorry it's so short, but I wanted to get it out to you guys as ssoon as I could :)
Chapter Fifteen: Lose Yourself
by Capella no da
A/N: Finally :) Another day, another chapter - I've decided that I really, really need some more slash-ness in here. For a slash story, it really doesn't have all that much.
Wow...162 reviews! *glomps reviewers* You guys are the greatest, honestly ^_^ You really know how to make a girl happy :D You know what would be REALLY cool? If I got to 180! I know, I know...only twenty more! Come on you guys, I'll do something *cool* in my next chapter if you do! ^_^
Next, thank you very much Thornangel for the nice email *beams* That sort of got me off my lazy bum to finish this chapter. So thank you!
I need to thank some more people real quick, since this is sort of the huge thank you note for all the chapter so far. I won't go through ALL my reviewers, but I do very much want to thank the people who review almost/every single chapter. So, to Pheonix, Kilohana, Thornangel, Aleydis, Gia2, Alchemy, Dark Hikari Kamiya, RJLL, Lady Bisenshi, Icefire, Basilisk, Silent Stalker, M14Mouse, and Sorceress Jade - the biggest thank you in the entire world. You guys were there since the VERY beginning, and I hope you'll be there til the bitter end. I don't know quite how to thank you guys enough so - I hope this'll do :)
And Verok - I thought about what you said, and I appreciate it and I see where you're coming from. The only thing is - as good of a writer as Tolkien was- I don't want to be him exactly. I want to write in my own style, though it can sound a little forced or choppy sometimes. It's the only way to get better, you know? I need to have my own voice in my writing, even if it's not as good as Tolkien's But thank you for the advice!
Lastly, to Sara...you just totally whammied me upside the head! *grins* Up until this point, I had honestly just forgotten about Voldemort. Woohoo, another reason for angst! And ya'll have Sara to thank for it *grins* By the way, those ideas are lovely, especially the staff thing. And I'd do some of that stuff but...well, you'll see. ^_~
Alright, I've seen other authors do this so I've decided to, also - I'm going to start a little mailing list thing. All you need to do is put your name down when you review or email me, and I'll put you on. Every time I update my story, I'll send you an email. If you want off, just tell me.
I'm really, really very sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. It won't happen again, i promise! I'm doing chapters within at least *2 weeks* of each other. PROMISE!
Review please! Because yesterday was my birthday! *grins*
____________________________
Look, if you had once shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted...one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?...
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow it
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime
-Eminem (yes, you heard me right, it just fit), "Lose Yourself"
____________________________
"We need to talk."
Harry's face had been lit by the slowly setting sun Legolas had found him sitting on a blackened stone away from everyone, his legs drawn up to his chest and his head on his knees. Now the Sickle of the Valar was high and bright in the darkened sky, only then did Legolas realize how long he'd been standing there. Harry's face was dark in the fading light but Legolas could make out the green glitter of his eyes behind his glasses and the stubborn set of his jaw. There was a long silence before Harry replied.
"What do you want?"
Legolas very nearly sighed. "I want to talk to you, Harry. Please."
There was a pause, then Harry's head turned toward Legolas and he motioned to the spot next to him. He turned back away once Legolas sat.
Now that he was so close to Harry, Legolas forgot his carefully worded speech that he had thought about all day and for a moment could only stare at Harry's beautiful profile, wanting to run his fingers through the thick black hair.
"Legolas. You wanted something."
It was more of a command than a question, and laced through the words was barely concealed impatience. All rational thought fled Legolas's head.
"By the Valar, Harry, what is the matter with you?" he said, and regretted the words the instant they left his mouth. They didn't produce quite the reaction he had expected, however.
"I'm fine. There's nothing wrong with me." He tugged on a black forelock that hung in his eyes, voice getting more and more hysterical. He added a whispered "we're both fine" almost as an afterthought. Legolas reached out a hand and touched Harry's cheek gently.
"Harry, what -"
"Who was -- is Ilmare?" Harry said abruptly, turning his eyes back down to his feet and leaning away from Legolas's hand. Unsurprised, Legolas turned Harry's head back toward him, looking Harry in the eyes and stroking his lower lip with a bow callused thumb.
"I have never been to the everlasting city of Valinor, but even I know who Ilmare is. She is the handmaiden of Varda, and it is said among my people that she is next to Varda in beauty and gentleness." Suddenly, Legolas frowned in thought, his thumb pausing in its rhythmic caress. "How is that you know of Ilmare?"
Harry's eyes looked scared now, cornered, like a spooked horse. He didn't seem to be able to pull his head away. "I...I heard Gandalf talking about her. Yesterday," he said hesitantly, his mouth moving whisper-soft against Legolas's fingers until he finally looked away.
Legolas said nothing, knowing the lie even as it came out of Harry's mouth. He let the overwhelming silence between them stretch on until Harry shifted under Legolas's hard gray gaze.
"I know who she is," Harry said softly, "and I know her like I'd know my own sister. I...today..." He trailed off, obviously struggling for words. "Christ! You heard me! I was standing there and all the sudden I wasn't me. It seemed like - like someone else just took over my body and my memories and my voice, because that wasn't me talking. I saw - all these people that I haven't ever met, but they seem so familiar to me...I feel like I've met and loved them all..." He worried his lower lip with even white teeth while looking terribly lost.
At that moment all the thoughts that Legolas was about to say flew from his mind, and raising Harry's head with a hand, he leaned in and pressed his lips gently to Harry's. When Harry didn't respond, Legolas opened his eyes to see Harry staring back at him with a dazed look on his face, and smiling softly Legolas leaned in for another kiss.
It wasn't anything like the tentative kisses of before; this one was slow and sweet as Legolas stole the breath from Harry's body. He could feel Harry's knees start to give out and he wound his arms around Harry's waist to hold him up. Harry broke away, eyes wide and scared.
"I can't -"
Legolas was suddenly more angry than he had ever been in his long life. "You can, Harry, what I believe you mean is that you will not. You are more frightened than I have ever seen you be, and that is why you are running away," he said vehemently. Harry opened his mouth, angry, to protest, but Legolas cut him off sharply. "You *are* running away. Do not try and tell me that you are not."
Harry narrowed his eyes and set his jaw, offence clearly in his tone. "I've got a lover, if I forgot to tell you." It was clearly said to sting, and it did.
"You believe you will ever go home?" Legolas shot back, feeling slightly guilty when Harry's face paled and his fists clenched until his knuckles went white.
"Shut up!" Harry yelled. "Just...shut up! I'm going to go home. I'm..." His voice choked up and he collapsed against Legolas's chest, pressing his face into Legolas's soft gray shirt with dry, heaving sobs tearing out of his throat. Tanned hands twisted in the thick fabric as Legolas stroked Harry's black hair gently.
"I want to go home." Harry whispered with heart-breaking simplicity, staring up at Legolas desperately and clutching Legolas's shirt closer like a lifeline. "Please."
Legolas surpressed a slight stab of irrational jealousy, wanting Harry to think of this as his home, wanting him to be the reason that Harry wanted to stay. Wanting nothing more than for love to keep Harry in Middle-earth.
"Make it go away."
Legolas started and stared down at Harry with surprise. Emerald eyes gazed up at Legolas and he saw no hesitation or remorse as Harry leaned up and placed a light kiss on his lips.
"Harry - are you sure -"
Harry smiled with a hint of smugness as he reached up and wrapped his arms around Legolas's neck, bringing the elf down to him. "Now who's running?" he whispered, and Legolas, entranced by the feel of Harry's lips moving against his own, was helpless to do anything but lean down and kiss him back. Legolas nibbled gently on Harry's full bottom lip in a wordless request and Harry complied, opening his mouth and letting the soft fulless of Legolas's tongue slip in. Little slivers of sensation began dancing their way up Legolas's spine, chills spreading over his body. Every part of him seemed oversensitized, and he was acutely aware of Harry's hands tangled in his hair.
Harry broke away panting for breath. "Is everyone asleep?" he murmered between great gulps for air.
"Yes, but -"
Smiling wickedly, Harry gently pushed Legolas down onto his back. "Good."
________________________
The next morning dawned grey and gloomy, the dark rainclouds hovering so close overhead that it almost seemed they were within reach. A strong wind had picked up in the middle of the night sometime, and Harry hugged his cloak tighter around his body, shivering.
He had woken that morning alone, which would have been an insult if he hadn't been aware of the escape of Saruman that Legolas was probably worried about. Hearing Merry and Pippin talk about it that morning, he had felt that strange feeling he had the day before, that maybe there was someone else sharing his body. It had passed nearly as soon as it had come over him.
During the night he'd had two more pain attacks.
They were getting closer together now, more violent and horrible. Harry shuddered and clutched his cloak, imagining that he was feeling the stirrings of fire in his stomach again. But he waited, and it passed, just the ghost of pain.
He was sitting on the black steps of Orthanc, looking at the bloody White Hand, when Gandalf came over to talk to him.
"Harry, are you all right?"
Harry let out a long-suffering sigh. This conversation seemed vaguely familiar somehow. "I'm fine, Gandalf, thanks," he said lightly, trying not to be rude because it really wasn't Gandalf's fault that Legolas had left him before he'd woken up. Which was, now that Harry thought about it, rather rude.
"You are sure?" Gandalf asked.
"Yes, I'm-"
The end of his sentance broke off in a gasp as he experianced the strange feeling that someone had reached a hand down his throat and squeezed all the air out of his lungs. He doubled over as soon as the first pang shot through him, from his toes to the top of his head. Fingers of pain were digging into his body viciously and Harry shut his eyes tightly, clutching his stomach. He was sure he was making the most embarrassing noises, but at the moment, nothing but the fiery pain running up and down his nerves mattered.
Sitting up became too much for his body to take, and he fell off the step onto the cold ground with his knees to his chest. He couldn't help the sharp cry that was torn from his throat as a particularly bad spike of pain shot through him. And, just like the other attacks, it stopped as suddenly as it had started.
"You are fine, are you." It wasn't a question. Harry opened his mouth to protest that yes, he was fine in fact, when Gandalf continued. "Do you know what it is I saw before you closed your eyes? They had a coating of silver."
Something in Gandalf's voice sounded strange, a little touch of sadness, but different than before. It was like a doctor about to announce a patient's uncurable disease. "You know what's wrong with me."
Gandalf sighed, face unreadable. "I do know what is wrong with you, young wizard. But I am not quite sure if I am correct. I am not willing to reveal anything right now to you, not until I have a more perfect understanding of what is happening to you."
"What kind of shit wisdom is that?" he demanded angrily, glaring at Gandalf. "If I'm going to die then just tell me, instead of letting me sit here and rot over it."
Gandalf didn't reply and looked troubled. Without another word, the wizard stood up and walked off in the general direction of Treebeard and the others. Harry attempted to glare a hole in the back of his head. He assumed the reason that it didn't work had something to do with the fact that he knew he'd forgotten something.
The feeling had been bothering him for a few days, the kind of feeling he got when he forgot to do some sort of homework but didn't remember what class it was for. Try as he might, whatever it was he forgot was gone.
Harry got up slowly from the stone steps, deciding to take a walk to see if he couldn't clear his head and maybe find Legolas in the process. However, while walking around camp and staring at the grey stratus overhead, he felt his foot catch on something and went sprawling over the rocky ground. One of his hands was skinned from the fall and he was sure from the spreading wetness that he had took some skin off his knee, too.
He twisted back around to see what he had tripped over and found himself staring at two pairs of sleepy, brown hobbit eyes.
"Isn't it a little late to be sleeping in, you two? And why in the world were you sleeping out here, instead of inside?" he asked absently. They were sleeping awfully close, under one blanket, and was Pippin wearing a shirt?
"We were about to get up! Just now!" Merry said, scrambling out of the blanket, pulling on his shirt that had been lying on the pack next to his made-up bed. "We just...didn't get the chance to go inside last night, is all." He sounded strangely defensive.
Harry shrugged and tried his best to blot the blood on his knee with a corner of his cloak. "Well, I think we're going soon, so when you two get ready find Gandalf." He stood back up and started walking away, toward Treebeard's towering form. Only as a curious afterthought did he turn around and see Merry and Pippin sharing in a sweet kiss. He shook his head.
"At least I'm not the only one," he murmered, laughing softly.
__________________________
A/N: (again)! Sorry guys, no lemon here. I decided not to put one in because a)-I'm determined to make this only PG-13, and b) I think they're banned anyways.
I hope you like it - I'm sorry it's so short, but I wanted to get it out to you guys as ssoon as I could :)