13 contestants-
50,000,000 Dollars-
A lot of Blood-
This.is..
WWE GAUNTLET!
(the video is shown set to Survivor music: Jeff Hardy is shown jumping off of a tree landing on a innocent monkey, Goldberg is shown spearing a Tree, RVD reading High Times magazine, Hurricane swinging from a grapevine, Ultimate warrior convulsing a lot, Triple H pedigreeing a gorilla, Ken Shamrock calm then a mosquito bite shis shoulder and he goes into "the zone". Hulk flexing his muscles. Disco inferno Disco dances a lot. Hawk and animal raising there hands in the air and sticking their tongues out. Goldust humping a tree, and JR pouring BBQ Sauce ona government mule. After the intro video we go to our host Troy Mclure, now in a pasture with a bunch of cows in it)
Troy: Hello im Troy Mclure, You may remember me from " American Idol 3: The search for the next religious figure" and "watch scott hall stumble around drunk"! Now this pasture is justpart of the massive killing grounds that these wrestlers will fight in. let's show you the last 3 days
(We go first to a airplane where all the wrestlers are blindfolded )
Jeff hardy: WHOA THIS IS THE XTREEEEME!
Pilot: we are about to land now.
Jeff Hardy: LIVE 4THE MOMENT!
(Jeff opens the door to the airplans and jumps out with a parachute pack on.)
Hawk: OHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH.of AIR!
Hurricane: oh no fellow citizens! Someone took my backpack and left me with this parachute pack! OH NO! That innocent bystander who jumped off the plane stole my backpack! The Hurricane must catche this evil villian! So long fellow citizens!
(Hurricane jumps out of the airplan with a WHOOSH. The plane hits the runway ramp or..the highway and hits a car on the highway smashing it to bits and killing the person driving.)
HHH: HAHAHA! THAT CAR WAS CRUSHED BY THE GAME! HE COULDN'T PLAY THE GAME! I NOW FORCED A CAR TO JOB TO ME!
( The plane comes to a stop and the floor from underneath JR falls out.)
JR: MAH GAWD! THE FLOOR JUST BROKE LIKE A SCALDED DOG ON DRUGS!
( The plane takes off again. 30 seconds later the floor drops out from underneath Ken Shamrock)
Ken shamrock: AHHHHHHHH! IM IN THE ZONE!
(once again the plane takes off and this time drops off the Ultimate warrior at some hicks house.)
Ultimate Warrior: Warrior must spread the words of the warriorites to other while killing the Hulkamaniacs!
(The plane takes off and drops off Animal and Hawk at a Convienant store)
Animal: FOOD!
Hawk: OHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH!
( The plane goes down the highway and drops RVD off into a creek while in flight. RVD five star frog splashes into the creek. RVD sees a frog)
RVD: Whoaaaa..frogs rule!
(the floor drops out from underneath Hulk hogan who is now dressed up like santa with muscles and is in a sleigh with deers. Hulk pulls back on a rope and the deers release parachutes! Hulk lands in a swimming pool)
Hulk Hogan: HO HO HO BROTHER!
( Goldberg sees a lizard on the side of the plane)
goldberg: WHOS NEXT!? YOU MISTER LIZARD!
(goldberg spears the lizard going throught he glass window landing on a trampoline.)
Goldust: oooooo.its just me..and you mr Plane Driver!
(Goldust grabs the driver of the plane. The drive hits the eject button sending him flying out of the plane. Goldust stares blankly into the sky. Goldut looks ahead of him and the plane hits a Electrical place thing. Sparks fly everywhere)
(camera switches to Jeff Hardy standing on a tree limb)
Jeff: (squeaky voice) i...IM..St..ILL.STANDING!
OS: AN ALIEN FORCE!
(Hurricane swings down from a grapevine and kicks jeff off of the tree branch sending him twelve feet below landing head first on a rock. Jeff raises his head up)
Jeff: THA..t was. THE XtrEMe!!!!!!
( In front of Jeff stands..a BOBCAT! Jeff stares blankly at it)
Jeff: OMG LOL WTF!?
(bobcat jumps on top of jeff but jeff hits a botched monkey flip sending the bobcat crashing into a tree. Jeff climbs the..tree. Jeff jumps off and hits the swanton..well.he missed by 3 feet. The bobcat looks at Jeff confused.Jeff gets up and flails his arms around wildly scaring the bobcat off. Suddenly from behind Hurricane hits Jeff with a SUPER SHINING WIZARD OFF OF THE TREE! JR suddenly waddles out from behind a tree with a HOSS BBQ SAUCE GUN OF DOOM!)
JR : MAH GAWD! THA HOORIKANE JUST HIT JEFF WITH A SUPER MONKEY EDUCATED FOOT KICK!!!! THAT MOVE HIT LIKE A ONE ARMED TEXAN WITH A A AND M HAT ON IN OKLAHOMA HUMPING A CAMEL!
(JR Sprays Hurricane with Hot BBQ sauce from his gun.)
Hurricane: AH! BBQ SAUCE.my Weakness. Hurricane must retreat from battle and return three comic books later! WHOOSH!
(hurricane flies off stage)
JR: MAH GAWD! JR IS A HOSS! HAS HE NO SOUL!?
(Jeff runs off flailing his arms. Suddenly we switch to the convenient store where animal and hawk are at the cash register. On the check out is ding dongs, oreos, BBQ chips, Gatorades, ANIMAL crackers, and 4 sets of beef jerky.)
old lady cashier: that will be 28.00
Animal: WHAT!? DO YOU KNOWHO WE ARE!!?
Old lady Cashier: Weird guys wearing spiked football pads!
ANIMAL: OH NO YOUDONT.IARM NOYT GOIN TA TARK THAT! TelelsaslsdduirnognognsoaahOOOOOOOO! Tell em hawk!
Hawk: Well! You see Old Mean Gene, we are the greatest tag team to ever grace the SQUUUAAAAARED CIRCLE. And Even thoguh WE are great, We spent all of our money before the airplane ride Buying booze! So we have no money!
Old lady: ohhh.so you guys are some of those wrestler guys that were put here to kill eachother in a ongoing battle full of blood shed, fart jokes, and old guys!?
Hawk: Darned Straight Miss Liz! Now with that said (Hawk grabs the gatorade opens it up and drinks some) UUUUAAAAGAGGHHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH!!!!
( Hawk and animal walks out of the convenience store. Outside of the convenience store Triple H is pedigreeing a dog)
Triple H: HAHAHAHA.YOU BITCH! I AM THE GAME! BITCHES CANT PLAY THE GAME! (Triple H gets on top of a car stretches his arms out ward in his signature turnbuckle pose) UAAAAGHHHHHHH! ( Triple H sees hawk and animal) huh!? THEY HAVENT JOBBED TO ME! I AM THE GAME! I HAVE CREATIVE CONTROL! UAAAAGHH!
(Triple H jumps off the top of the car and grabs the RUBBER TRASHCAN OF DOOM! Triple H runs towards Hawk and Animal and hits them both with it..THEY DON'T SELL! Hawk and animal stare at him blankly.)
Hawk: HHH..this is real..not wrestling..
Triple H: But I am the game and I make the rules!
Animal: WERLL WE BRAKE TE H ROOLZ!!!!
(Hawk charges at Triple H and stabs him with his RUBBER SPIKES OF DOOM. Triple H gives hawk THE KNEE SMASH and throws him through a car window. Animal attacks Triple H with a CLOTHESLINE over a parking rail. Animal whips triple H towards the gas pumps but HHH reverses and animal goes into the pumps. HHH goes inside the store and buys some bottled water, stands on a car and spews whatever everywhere while yelling UUUAAAGGGHHH!)
(we switch to RVD sitting in a lillypad talking to a frog)
RVD: and that's how me and Sabu met at a whorehouse..
Frog: ribbit ribbit.
(at least that's what we hear.RVD hears this.)
Frog: WAY COOL DUDE!
RVD: I KNOW! Man...water rules...
(suddenly a flailing armed jeff runs into the water turning the green moldy creek into a blue and red creek. Jeff gets up and sees he has no more paint on him)
Jeff: OMG! MAH XTREEEEEEEEEME Paintis gone..Jeff Hardy.
(Jeff does the hardy sign and does a railrunner off of a log anf back into the woods.)
RVD: man.that dood's on something. Anywas man wanna here how me and kane met and how i knew i should get him a hungry hungry hippos game?
(we go to hulk Hogan in the santa Claus Costume in a swimming pool. Hulk pulls himself out and rips off his shirt and starts doing his taunts as two little children stare at him awkwardly.)
Hulk: hey little Hulkamaniacs! It's the hulkster here to tell you to take your vitamins everyday and ALWAYS say your prays dude!
Little kid:...go away Dumbass weird old fat ass.
Hulk: whoaa..little Hulkster, you shouldn't say stuff like that brother. You see, im hulk hogan..
Little kid: hulk hogan sucks...GRAND THEFT AUTO RULES!
(the kids run off shooting eachother with paintball guns.)
( we go to ken Shamrock standing in a pasture.)
Ken: hey, this place is nice and serene, im going to like this break.
Cow: moooooo.
Ken: YOU RUINED THE QUIETNESS! IM IN THE ZONE! AHHHH!
(Ken attacks the cowand tries to tackle it head first. Ken bounce off the cow knocked out. The cow stare sta it for a second and goes back to eating it's grass.)
( we go to goldberg laying knocked out by a school, in the school's basketball court where teenagers are standing over goldberg staring at him.)
Teen: whoa..it's that one guy I used to watch on TV that never lost!
Teen 2: yeah.but wrestling sucks now.GRAND THEFT AUTO RULES!
(golbergs eyes shoot open and Goldbegr no sells the large gash on the back of his head. goldberg grabs a teen by the neck)
Goldberg: ARE YOU NEXT!? YOUR NEXT NOW PRETTY BOY!
(goldberg picks the teen up and throws him into a basketball post. Goldberg spears a scrawny guy and kicks a 6 foot tall white guy with an afro in the head knocking him out cold.)
Goldberg: WHO's NEXT!?
(goldberg runs off the court and crashes through the glass doors of the school.)
(we switch to ultimate warrior knocking on the hicks door. Suddenly.a gun barrel appears through thr window on the door.)
Hicks: who int arnation is out thar!?
Ultimate warrior: THE WARRIOR IS SENT HERE TO BRING YOU GEAT NEWS!
(the hick stare sout of the door window and opens the door. The hick is wearing a black shirt with a rebel flag on it, and some old worn out wranglers.)
Hick: arant you that one wrassler from the WWF!?
Warrior: NO MORE THE WARRIOR ISNT ! WARRIOR WENT BACK TO THE STARS OF PLANET WARRIOR AND HAS BEEN SENT HERE TO BRING IN MINIONS TO DESTROY THE EVILS OF THIS WORLD.
Hick:...oh...you like moonshine?
(suddenly the hicks boy steps out with a HULK HOGAN shirt on.although its worn out)
boy: hay Daddy, carn I go a keel sum of dem dare chickens with your shotgunn!?
Hick: I reckon. Just don't shoot your little sister.
Ultimate warrior: YOU LOOK LIKE A PERFECT WARRIORITE! CAN I COME IN AND TEACH YOU ABOUT WARRIORISM AND THE WAY IT CAN PULSATE THROUGH YOUR BODY!?
Hick: are you talking about that Cokaine?
Ultimate Warrior: NO im.
(Warrior sees Boy's shirt. Warrior fills with rage and tackles the little boy down with a clothesline. Warrior picks the hick up and gorilla press slams him into his old crappy ford truck. The boy gets up and hits Warrior in the head with the gun. Warrior no sells and begins pumping his hands to the sky. Warrior Powerslams the kid through the crappy porch, and sets fire to the house.)
Warrior : DIE! HULKAMANIA SHALL DIE! HAHAHAHA! HULKAMANIA INPREGNATED THE SIGNATURE LAMB OF THE GRASSY FIELD OF NORTH DAKOTA!!!!!!
(after a few more words that arent understandable by Ultimate Warrior we suddenly switch back to Troy Mclure)
Troy: wow.what an exciting 3 days it has been! It may seem like on day but we were hoping that you wouldn't notice! Anyways! Its time for our Gauntlet challenge! From the viewers it seems our winner for this weeks gauntlet challenge is...*drum roll* .JEFF HARDY!
(camera switches to jeff flailing his arms around a little pond. Troy's voice is synchronized in. some security guys stop jeff)
Jeff: WTF!? I got 2 Live 4 Te h Moment!
Security guard: Jeff, your todays gaunlet challenge contestant.
Jeff: OMG! I AM!? XTREEEEEME!
Troy's voice: today's gauntlet challenge is one that is sure to cause mass blooodshed and will leave Jeff having to have a lot of blood tranfusions so he can stay in the game! Today.at the end of this pond lays an orange flag. Jeff has to cross this pond get the flag and come back..but that's not it.this pond is chock full of Parahnas, electric eels, and jellyfish! If jeff wins he will get a brand new bucket of paint.if he fails.well..he gets a blood transfusion...to kepp him going. Anyways..are you ready jeff!?
Jeff: Live 4 the moment XTREMELY!
Troy: GO!
(Jeff botches a swanton bomb into the pond landing on his neck. Jeff Gets up barely and flails his arms until the water gets deep. Jeff starts swimming and whincing in pain as the piranhas bite him)
Jeff: OMG! A FISH Just BiT Mah G00ber!LOL!
(Jeff keeps swimming until suddenly he starts convulsing as if being electricuted.Jeff then goes underwater...30 seconds later..nothing still)
Troy: er.is he dead?
(suddenly Jeff appears back up with half of his face chewed to bits)
Jeff: OMG! THIS IS XTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME!
(Jeff makes it to the flag gets it and starts swimming back getting electricuted and bit until he reaches the end!)
Troy: JEFF MAKES IT!
(security guards help pull jeff out aqnd see that his skin on his leg has been somewhat tore off but luckily his cargo pants saves some and the fumes of paint insid ehis skin sent some piranhas away.)
JEFF: OMG! I RISKED MY LIFE 4 the I-MAG-IN-A-TION!
(Jeff is dragged into the ambulance where they further operate on him.)
Troy: lucky for jeff..he wins a new bucket of paint too.(reads from cue) 2 reingine his XTREEEEEEEEEEEEMEness..whatever. Well..that's our show for today! Tomorrow, we expect someone to die! So tune in as the fight for money continues and remember to vote for who you want to compete in next weeks Gauntlet challenge! Until next time, Im Troy Mclure.and the simpsons are going to sue me!
(Credits are shown. Sanford and Son comes on.)
This.is..
WWE GAUNTLET!
(the video is shown set to Survivor music: Jeff Hardy is shown jumping off of a tree landing on a innocent monkey, Goldberg is shown spearing a Tree, RVD reading High Times magazine, Hurricane swinging from a grapevine, Ultimate warrior convulsing a lot, Triple H pedigreeing a gorilla, Ken Shamrock calm then a mosquito bite shis shoulder and he goes into "the zone". Hulk flexing his muscles. Disco inferno Disco dances a lot. Hawk and animal raising there hands in the air and sticking their tongues out. Goldust humping a tree, and JR pouring BBQ Sauce ona government mule. After the intro video we go to our host Troy Mclure, now in a pasture with a bunch of cows in it)
Troy: Hello im Troy Mclure, You may remember me from " American Idol 3: The search for the next religious figure" and "watch scott hall stumble around drunk"! Now this pasture is justpart of the massive killing grounds that these wrestlers will fight in. let's show you the last 3 days
(We go first to a airplane where all the wrestlers are blindfolded )
Jeff hardy: WHOA THIS IS THE XTREEEEME!
Pilot: we are about to land now.
Jeff Hardy: LIVE 4THE MOMENT!
(Jeff opens the door to the airplans and jumps out with a parachute pack on.)
Hawk: OHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH.of AIR!
Hurricane: oh no fellow citizens! Someone took my backpack and left me with this parachute pack! OH NO! That innocent bystander who jumped off the plane stole my backpack! The Hurricane must catche this evil villian! So long fellow citizens!
(Hurricane jumps out of the airplan with a WHOOSH. The plane hits the runway ramp or..the highway and hits a car on the highway smashing it to bits and killing the person driving.)
HHH: HAHAHA! THAT CAR WAS CRUSHED BY THE GAME! HE COULDN'T PLAY THE GAME! I NOW FORCED A CAR TO JOB TO ME!
( The plane comes to a stop and the floor from underneath JR falls out.)
JR: MAH GAWD! THE FLOOR JUST BROKE LIKE A SCALDED DOG ON DRUGS!
( The plane takes off again. 30 seconds later the floor drops out from underneath Ken Shamrock)
Ken shamrock: AHHHHHHHH! IM IN THE ZONE!
(once again the plane takes off and this time drops off the Ultimate warrior at some hicks house.)
Ultimate Warrior: Warrior must spread the words of the warriorites to other while killing the Hulkamaniacs!
(The plane takes off and drops off Animal and Hawk at a Convienant store)
Animal: FOOD!
Hawk: OHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH!
( The plane goes down the highway and drops RVD off into a creek while in flight. RVD five star frog splashes into the creek. RVD sees a frog)
RVD: Whoaaaa..frogs rule!
(the floor drops out from underneath Hulk hogan who is now dressed up like santa with muscles and is in a sleigh with deers. Hulk pulls back on a rope and the deers release parachutes! Hulk lands in a swimming pool)
Hulk Hogan: HO HO HO BROTHER!
( Goldberg sees a lizard on the side of the plane)
goldberg: WHOS NEXT!? YOU MISTER LIZARD!
(goldberg spears the lizard going throught he glass window landing on a trampoline.)
Goldust: oooooo.its just me..and you mr Plane Driver!
(Goldust grabs the driver of the plane. The drive hits the eject button sending him flying out of the plane. Goldust stares blankly into the sky. Goldut looks ahead of him and the plane hits a Electrical place thing. Sparks fly everywhere)
(camera switches to Jeff Hardy standing on a tree limb)
Jeff: (squeaky voice) i...IM..St..ILL.STANDING!
OS: AN ALIEN FORCE!
(Hurricane swings down from a grapevine and kicks jeff off of the tree branch sending him twelve feet below landing head first on a rock. Jeff raises his head up)
Jeff: THA..t was. THE XtrEMe!!!!!!
( In front of Jeff stands..a BOBCAT! Jeff stares blankly at it)
Jeff: OMG LOL WTF!?
(bobcat jumps on top of jeff but jeff hits a botched monkey flip sending the bobcat crashing into a tree. Jeff climbs the..tree. Jeff jumps off and hits the swanton..well.he missed by 3 feet. The bobcat looks at Jeff confused.Jeff gets up and flails his arms around wildly scaring the bobcat off. Suddenly from behind Hurricane hits Jeff with a SUPER SHINING WIZARD OFF OF THE TREE! JR suddenly waddles out from behind a tree with a HOSS BBQ SAUCE GUN OF DOOM!)
JR : MAH GAWD! THA HOORIKANE JUST HIT JEFF WITH A SUPER MONKEY EDUCATED FOOT KICK!!!! THAT MOVE HIT LIKE A ONE ARMED TEXAN WITH A A AND M HAT ON IN OKLAHOMA HUMPING A CAMEL!
(JR Sprays Hurricane with Hot BBQ sauce from his gun.)
Hurricane: AH! BBQ SAUCE.my Weakness. Hurricane must retreat from battle and return three comic books later! WHOOSH!
(hurricane flies off stage)
JR: MAH GAWD! JR IS A HOSS! HAS HE NO SOUL!?
(Jeff runs off flailing his arms. Suddenly we switch to the convenient store where animal and hawk are at the cash register. On the check out is ding dongs, oreos, BBQ chips, Gatorades, ANIMAL crackers, and 4 sets of beef jerky.)
old lady cashier: that will be 28.00
Animal: WHAT!? DO YOU KNOWHO WE ARE!!?
Old lady Cashier: Weird guys wearing spiked football pads!
ANIMAL: OH NO YOUDONT.IARM NOYT GOIN TA TARK THAT! TelelsaslsdduirnognognsoaahOOOOOOOO! Tell em hawk!
Hawk: Well! You see Old Mean Gene, we are the greatest tag team to ever grace the SQUUUAAAAARED CIRCLE. And Even thoguh WE are great, We spent all of our money before the airplane ride Buying booze! So we have no money!
Old lady: ohhh.so you guys are some of those wrestler guys that were put here to kill eachother in a ongoing battle full of blood shed, fart jokes, and old guys!?
Hawk: Darned Straight Miss Liz! Now with that said (Hawk grabs the gatorade opens it up and drinks some) UUUUAAAAGAGGHHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH!!!!
( Hawk and animal walks out of the convenience store. Outside of the convenience store Triple H is pedigreeing a dog)
Triple H: HAHAHAHA.YOU BITCH! I AM THE GAME! BITCHES CANT PLAY THE GAME! (Triple H gets on top of a car stretches his arms out ward in his signature turnbuckle pose) UAAAAGHHHHHHH! ( Triple H sees hawk and animal) huh!? THEY HAVENT JOBBED TO ME! I AM THE GAME! I HAVE CREATIVE CONTROL! UAAAAGHH!
(Triple H jumps off the top of the car and grabs the RUBBER TRASHCAN OF DOOM! Triple H runs towards Hawk and Animal and hits them both with it..THEY DON'T SELL! Hawk and animal stare at him blankly.)
Hawk: HHH..this is real..not wrestling..
Triple H: But I am the game and I make the rules!
Animal: WERLL WE BRAKE TE H ROOLZ!!!!
(Hawk charges at Triple H and stabs him with his RUBBER SPIKES OF DOOM. Triple H gives hawk THE KNEE SMASH and throws him through a car window. Animal attacks Triple H with a CLOTHESLINE over a parking rail. Animal whips triple H towards the gas pumps but HHH reverses and animal goes into the pumps. HHH goes inside the store and buys some bottled water, stands on a car and spews whatever everywhere while yelling UUUAAAGGGHHH!)
(we switch to RVD sitting in a lillypad talking to a frog)
RVD: and that's how me and Sabu met at a whorehouse..
Frog: ribbit ribbit.
(at least that's what we hear.RVD hears this.)
Frog: WAY COOL DUDE!
RVD: I KNOW! Man...water rules...
(suddenly a flailing armed jeff runs into the water turning the green moldy creek into a blue and red creek. Jeff gets up and sees he has no more paint on him)
Jeff: OMG! MAH XTREEEEEEEEEME Paintis gone..Jeff Hardy.
(Jeff does the hardy sign and does a railrunner off of a log anf back into the woods.)
RVD: man.that dood's on something. Anywas man wanna here how me and kane met and how i knew i should get him a hungry hungry hippos game?
(we go to hulk Hogan in the santa Claus Costume in a swimming pool. Hulk pulls himself out and rips off his shirt and starts doing his taunts as two little children stare at him awkwardly.)
Hulk: hey little Hulkamaniacs! It's the hulkster here to tell you to take your vitamins everyday and ALWAYS say your prays dude!
Little kid:...go away Dumbass weird old fat ass.
Hulk: whoaa..little Hulkster, you shouldn't say stuff like that brother. You see, im hulk hogan..
Little kid: hulk hogan sucks...GRAND THEFT AUTO RULES!
(the kids run off shooting eachother with paintball guns.)
( we go to ken Shamrock standing in a pasture.)
Ken: hey, this place is nice and serene, im going to like this break.
Cow: moooooo.
Ken: YOU RUINED THE QUIETNESS! IM IN THE ZONE! AHHHH!
(Ken attacks the cowand tries to tackle it head first. Ken bounce off the cow knocked out. The cow stare sta it for a second and goes back to eating it's grass.)
( we go to goldberg laying knocked out by a school, in the school's basketball court where teenagers are standing over goldberg staring at him.)
Teen: whoa..it's that one guy I used to watch on TV that never lost!
Teen 2: yeah.but wrestling sucks now.GRAND THEFT AUTO RULES!
(golbergs eyes shoot open and Goldbegr no sells the large gash on the back of his head. goldberg grabs a teen by the neck)
Goldberg: ARE YOU NEXT!? YOUR NEXT NOW PRETTY BOY!
(goldberg picks the teen up and throws him into a basketball post. Goldberg spears a scrawny guy and kicks a 6 foot tall white guy with an afro in the head knocking him out cold.)
Goldberg: WHO's NEXT!?
(goldberg runs off the court and crashes through the glass doors of the school.)
(we switch to ultimate warrior knocking on the hicks door. Suddenly.a gun barrel appears through thr window on the door.)
Hicks: who int arnation is out thar!?
Ultimate warrior: THE WARRIOR IS SENT HERE TO BRING YOU GEAT NEWS!
(the hick stare sout of the door window and opens the door. The hick is wearing a black shirt with a rebel flag on it, and some old worn out wranglers.)
Hick: arant you that one wrassler from the WWF!?
Warrior: NO MORE THE WARRIOR ISNT ! WARRIOR WENT BACK TO THE STARS OF PLANET WARRIOR AND HAS BEEN SENT HERE TO BRING IN MINIONS TO DESTROY THE EVILS OF THIS WORLD.
Hick:...oh...you like moonshine?
(suddenly the hicks boy steps out with a HULK HOGAN shirt on.although its worn out)
boy: hay Daddy, carn I go a keel sum of dem dare chickens with your shotgunn!?
Hick: I reckon. Just don't shoot your little sister.
Ultimate warrior: YOU LOOK LIKE A PERFECT WARRIORITE! CAN I COME IN AND TEACH YOU ABOUT WARRIORISM AND THE WAY IT CAN PULSATE THROUGH YOUR BODY!?
Hick: are you talking about that Cokaine?
Ultimate Warrior: NO im.
(Warrior sees Boy's shirt. Warrior fills with rage and tackles the little boy down with a clothesline. Warrior picks the hick up and gorilla press slams him into his old crappy ford truck. The boy gets up and hits Warrior in the head with the gun. Warrior no sells and begins pumping his hands to the sky. Warrior Powerslams the kid through the crappy porch, and sets fire to the house.)
Warrior : DIE! HULKAMANIA SHALL DIE! HAHAHAHA! HULKAMANIA INPREGNATED THE SIGNATURE LAMB OF THE GRASSY FIELD OF NORTH DAKOTA!!!!!!
(after a few more words that arent understandable by Ultimate Warrior we suddenly switch back to Troy Mclure)
Troy: wow.what an exciting 3 days it has been! It may seem like on day but we were hoping that you wouldn't notice! Anyways! Its time for our Gauntlet challenge! From the viewers it seems our winner for this weeks gauntlet challenge is...*drum roll* .JEFF HARDY!
(camera switches to jeff flailing his arms around a little pond. Troy's voice is synchronized in. some security guys stop jeff)
Jeff: WTF!? I got 2 Live 4 Te h Moment!
Security guard: Jeff, your todays gaunlet challenge contestant.
Jeff: OMG! I AM!? XTREEEEEME!
Troy's voice: today's gauntlet challenge is one that is sure to cause mass blooodshed and will leave Jeff having to have a lot of blood tranfusions so he can stay in the game! Today.at the end of this pond lays an orange flag. Jeff has to cross this pond get the flag and come back..but that's not it.this pond is chock full of Parahnas, electric eels, and jellyfish! If jeff wins he will get a brand new bucket of paint.if he fails.well..he gets a blood transfusion...to kepp him going. Anyways..are you ready jeff!?
Jeff: Live 4 the moment XTREMELY!
Troy: GO!
(Jeff botches a swanton bomb into the pond landing on his neck. Jeff Gets up barely and flails his arms until the water gets deep. Jeff starts swimming and whincing in pain as the piranhas bite him)
Jeff: OMG! A FISH Just BiT Mah G00ber!LOL!
(Jeff keeps swimming until suddenly he starts convulsing as if being electricuted.Jeff then goes underwater...30 seconds later..nothing still)
Troy: er.is he dead?
(suddenly Jeff appears back up with half of his face chewed to bits)
Jeff: OMG! THIS IS XTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME!
(Jeff makes it to the flag gets it and starts swimming back getting electricuted and bit until he reaches the end!)
Troy: JEFF MAKES IT!
(security guards help pull jeff out aqnd see that his skin on his leg has been somewhat tore off but luckily his cargo pants saves some and the fumes of paint insid ehis skin sent some piranhas away.)
JEFF: OMG! I RISKED MY LIFE 4 the I-MAG-IN-A-TION!
(Jeff is dragged into the ambulance where they further operate on him.)
Troy: lucky for jeff..he wins a new bucket of paint too.(reads from cue) 2 reingine his XTREEEEEEEEEEEEMEness..whatever. Well..that's our show for today! Tomorrow, we expect someone to die! So tune in as the fight for money continues and remember to vote for who you want to compete in next weeks Gauntlet challenge! Until next time, Im Troy Mclure.and the simpsons are going to sue me!
(Credits are shown. Sanford and Son comes on.)