Chapter 5: Right Realizations
It wasn't easy escaping Charlotte and her questions, or my Mum's who wasn't very happy that I hadn't come home. Mum was easier though, seeing as I just had to say that I had spent the night at Charlotte's and forgot to call.
I was on my bed before I let any of the thoughts that had been attacking me in His bed, rush back into my mind. I had a massive headache, probably due to the night before, and these questions really weren't helping, but I couldn't make them go away, especially not the look. The look in his eyes right before I had given in, the look that had probably, plus my drunken state, made me give in.
I was thinking about this when it happened. When a large body, went flying through my window, and landed with a loud thump on the floor. I sat up leaning over the side of the bed and wondering if I was still drunk. I wasn't, I found out when I saw that the person lying on my bedroom floor had ginger bed-head hair.
"You could have at least said good-bye," His muffled voice said. I was stunned. I couldn't think of anything to say, I really hadn't expected this. Finally all the words circling around my head let some spill out and I muttered:
"Are you ok?" He sat up, rubbing his knee, and grinned at me.
"I meant to land on the bed next to you, but jumping from that tree branch, I over-estimated," He explained and I saw it again. The look. I guess I sort of blame the look for what happened next, and maybe my raging headache, and the fact that I still felt a little guilty.
He was climbing onto my bed to make his departure back out the window, and it just happened. He was standing on my bed leaning out the window when I just grabbed his hand, and he turned and looked at me, and, then all of the sudden he was kneeling next to me on my bed, and I was grabbing the back of his head, and then our eyes were closing... It wasn't a long kiss or anything, just soft and sweet in a very un-Ron like way that was some how, at the same time, incredibly Ron like.
No one said anything for a long time after we pulled apart, we just looked at each other. That look.
"This can't happen," My voice was high and hoarse.
"Why not?" He asked in a low whisper.
"I don't date musicians, or chasers," It sounded petty coming out like that, and by the look on his face I could tell he thought it was petty.
"Why not?" He asked again with strained, artificial calmness.
"When they chase you, once you give in, they'll be bored," I explained in the same strange tone.
"I'll never be bored of you, after seven years, you should know that..." He trailed off waiting for me to explain the rest of my qualifications.
"I can't date musicians," I started slowly, "Because..." I was breathing hard and knew I couldn't finish. Not yet. Ron seemed to notice my feelings because his hand went to my shoulder and he ran his hand over it comfortingly.
"Can we be friends?" He asked slowly. I looked at him slightly surprised.
"We ARE friends," I said.
"Friends don't avoid each other," His voice rumbled seriously.
"I'm sorry... We can be friends," And I knew that I meant it, it wasn't a hollow promise like I had made to Harry about coming to see him, about calling him, about talking to him. This was for real. His face lightened up a little and he got up giving me the same tip-of-the-finger wave he had given the night of the wedding and he exited out the window.
~
I was still thinking about my promise to Ron as I showed up to work, late.
"So what the hell happened?" Charlotte asked once I stepped inside. I sighed rubbing my eyes and trying to shake off the headache that was still lingering.
"It's a long story," I murmured.
"I've got plenty of time," Charlotte insisted. I wasn't biting, I don't know why but this sort of thing just seemed to private, especially when it was about Ron and I. "Come on Herm, you HAVE to tell! I mean you bad-talk dating for months, ever since you got back from that private school, and then you ask me to pick you up a block away from some guy's house? Not only SOME guys house, but if I remember correctly, Nicole and Lane said something about seeing you with the lead singer of the Marauders!" She was practically shrieking now.
"It's not what it sounds like," I finally said, in a tone that was a bit flat.
"Elaborate," She instructed, and now I noticed that Nell and Roy were lingering annoyingly close.
"I got a bit sick, and he took me back to his place for a lie down. Nothing happened, we're just friends," I finally gave in. Nell and Roy looked a bit put-down by this but Charlotte still had that same twinkle in her eye.
"His name wouldn't happen to be Ron, would it?" I swallowed unnaturally hard.
"Maybe," the word slipped out before I could instruct my brain not to let it out. She squealed and Nell and Roy's heads both appeared peaking through the doorway that leads into the kitchen.
"Hold on," Charlotte finally said, a strange look of realization forming on her face, "Does that mean that your best friend from school is lead singer of The Marauders?" I nodded.
"You HAVE to introduce me!" She squealed even louder.
~
"Can we be friends?" His voice was still echoing through my head, as I explained the happenings of the night before to Nell, leaving out a few key parts: Aka. Me kissing Ron, and the whole look thing, and basically all the important stuff.
"Can we be friends?" It continued to echo as I made cappuccinos for a group of teens that seemed to be cutting class.
"Can we be friends?" The words sang as I waved to Roy and Nell, and the newest waitress Lena.
"Can we be friends?" It continued as I walked out to my car.
"Can we be friends?" It asked as I glanced up at the tall red-haired Ron Weasley leaning against my car.
"Hey," I muttered as if we were back at Hogwarts and nothing extraordinary had happened at all. He nodded in response, taking a long gulp from a paper cup with a straw, the kind you get at fast-food places.
"I just got a job at the one-hour-photo, with Dean," He said tilting his head to the building next to the one I had just exited.
"Do you even know what a one-hour-photo is?" I asked skeptically.
"Do now," He said grinning. "Dean does the hard stuff, you know, in the back room, I just work the counter," He raised an eyebrow amusedly.
"Nice," I muttered.
"I was going to work at the gas station with Harry, but they wouldn't hire me," He said sighing.
"Why is that?" I asked.
"That's for me to know, and you to wonder about," He said grinning. I shrugged going over to the driver's side of the car, unlocked it and got in. Ron bent over peering through the passenger side window, he tapped on the window. I rolled it down for him and he popped his head inside.
"Hey, can you give me a ride?" He asked. I was on the verge of saying yes when he pulled a hamburger out of his paper bag and took a bite.
"No food in my car," I said firmly, glancing at the spotless interior.
"Oh come on," He moaned sticking out his bottom lip like a small child. "Either that or I have to walk, or find a secluded place and apperate, but riding in cars is way more fun."
"No food-"
"I know, I know, no food in your car, I understand that, but can't you make an exception for your old FRIEND Ron?" He asked. I sighed knowing I had to, if I wanted to escape more flying-over-bed-attacks. I leaned over to unlock the door but he just pulled it open. I stared at the lock, which was already undone.
"Alohamora, before you came out, just incase you forgot that we're friends," He explained grinning. I rolled my eyes.
"Keep the food in the bag," I ordered as he pulled a handful of French Fries from his bag. He scowled at me before dropping them back in.
"You got really tight after you left didn't you?" He asked.
"What do you mean?" I asked still staring at the road in front of me.
"Well, Harry and I had you pretty loose those last few years of school, but now," He made a high-pitched squeaking noise and snapped his fingers. I turned glancing at him.
"Which way do I turn?" I asked flatly.
"What, you don't remember from when you spent the night?" He asked raising an eyebrow. "Left."
I turned sharply making him slam into the door of the car. He sat up rubbing his shoulder and was quiet for a while. I kept a watch on him out of the corner of my eye, as he tried to sneak a French frie. I smacked his arm and he dropped it back in the bag scowling.
"Your obsessive, did you know that?" He asked.
"At least I'm sane," I countered.
"The world is not perfect and clean Hermione, that's what you need to realize, you need to realize the unevenness of everything, the way that nothing is perfectly symmetrical to anything else," His voice was getting louder and more enthusiastic as he spoke, "Everything is out of the ordinary if you look at it truly. Cleanliness is a myth!" I turned and glared at him.
"Could you be quiet, I'm trying to dr-"
"HERMIONE!" He yelled all of the sudden pointing straight ahead. I whipped my head back to the road to see that I was in the wrong lane, and a truck was heading right for me. I swerved jerkily, ending up in the right lane once again, after a series of loud honks.
When I looked back at Ron to glare at him there was a single French frie sitting on the dashboard.
"Embrace the fact that nothing is perfect, and love the chaos of life," He said loudly. I glared at him picking up the greasy fried potato, rolled down my window and threw it out.
"Ooooh Hermione littered, Hermione's ba-ad," Ron sang grinning and stuffing another French frie in his mouth. I glared at him, grabbed the bag from his hand and threw it out the window too. He stared at me shocked.
"I can't believe you did that! You owe me big time!" He shouted incredulously.
"I'm driving you home, that's my pay-back," I muttered flatly.
"No way, you owe me something way bigger," He insisted, crossing his arms over his chest, and sinking down into the chair.
"Oh God, don't sit there and pout," I yelled.
"I'm not pouting," Ron, mumbled in a sulky voice, as if he were ten years old or something.
"I'm never giving you a ride again," I hissed angrily.
"You know," He said sitting up and getting that same stupid lopsided grin on his face again.
"What?" I asked exhaustedly.
"Being with you is like having a crush on a teacher," I turned and gave him a look, which he just countered with, "Are you going to punish me Mione?"
~
Harry, Seamus and Dean were sitting outside on the porch of the house I had snuck out of earlier that morning; it was a yellow house, roughly the colour of a banana that was just starting to get brown spots. They all started clapping as we drove up the driveway. Ron jumped out giving a deep and then ran around to the driver's side of the car as I was pulling out. He pulled out his wand yelling "Alohamora" at the door, and yanked it open.
"Come on, say hi to everyone at least," He begged.
"Look, I drove you home, isn't that good enough," I asked. He ignored this reply grabbing my hand and trying to pull me out of the car, thus making me lean forward, which lead to me hitting the gas really hard and almost running into the house, Ron running by the side still holding my hand. I hit the break just in time, and turned off the ignition sighing, that was the second time I'd almost killed myself in the car in one day.
I let Ron pull me out of the car and yank me up the steps of the porch. I let Harry hug me, and Seamus and Dean too. I even let Ron introduce me to the dog he had found two days ago, which he had named Chudley, in tribute to his favorite quidditch team. And all the time this was going on, I knew it was happening, but somehow I couldn't make it stop, I was getting stuck again, stuck between the people I loved and the life I wanted. The life where I was normal, where I didn't have to worry.
~
"I can't believe you actually got her to drive you home," Dean said shaking his head as they all walked me back to my car.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked narrowing my eyes at Ron who was making a swift motion with his hand across his neck, the way people do when they want you to shut-up.
"Well we all got off work at the same time, see Harry and I work at the gas station and Dean and Ron work at the One-hour-Fodo," Seamus explained.
"Photo," Dean corrected.
"And we were getting ready to leave, you know, when Ron jumped out of the van and said he was going to get you to drive him home," Harry ended. I looked at Ron who was pretending to be very interested in something on Chudley's head.
"Ron!" I shouted and he looked up as if he hadn't heard anything we had just said.
"You had a ride and you made ME drive you home?" I asked incredulously. He shrugged.
"Wanted to see if you were serious about not avoiding me," He said and the others all seemed to look more interested.
"I said it didn't I?" I asked lowering my voice slightly.
"Yeah, but I wasn't sure if you said it cause you meant it, or if you said it cause you thought you owed me after that kiss."
After that I pretty much died. I walked silently in this stunned way to my car, with all of them following me and shooting me questions and Ron following looking guilty and trying to give me these apologetic looks, which I glared at. I hugged Harry again as I got into the car and pulled away.
I was trapped.
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Thanks for my reviewers and sorry this one took longer to get out. Hope you like it.
It wasn't easy escaping Charlotte and her questions, or my Mum's who wasn't very happy that I hadn't come home. Mum was easier though, seeing as I just had to say that I had spent the night at Charlotte's and forgot to call.
I was on my bed before I let any of the thoughts that had been attacking me in His bed, rush back into my mind. I had a massive headache, probably due to the night before, and these questions really weren't helping, but I couldn't make them go away, especially not the look. The look in his eyes right before I had given in, the look that had probably, plus my drunken state, made me give in.
I was thinking about this when it happened. When a large body, went flying through my window, and landed with a loud thump on the floor. I sat up leaning over the side of the bed and wondering if I was still drunk. I wasn't, I found out when I saw that the person lying on my bedroom floor had ginger bed-head hair.
"You could have at least said good-bye," His muffled voice said. I was stunned. I couldn't think of anything to say, I really hadn't expected this. Finally all the words circling around my head let some spill out and I muttered:
"Are you ok?" He sat up, rubbing his knee, and grinned at me.
"I meant to land on the bed next to you, but jumping from that tree branch, I over-estimated," He explained and I saw it again. The look. I guess I sort of blame the look for what happened next, and maybe my raging headache, and the fact that I still felt a little guilty.
He was climbing onto my bed to make his departure back out the window, and it just happened. He was standing on my bed leaning out the window when I just grabbed his hand, and he turned and looked at me, and, then all of the sudden he was kneeling next to me on my bed, and I was grabbing the back of his head, and then our eyes were closing... It wasn't a long kiss or anything, just soft and sweet in a very un-Ron like way that was some how, at the same time, incredibly Ron like.
No one said anything for a long time after we pulled apart, we just looked at each other. That look.
"This can't happen," My voice was high and hoarse.
"Why not?" He asked in a low whisper.
"I don't date musicians, or chasers," It sounded petty coming out like that, and by the look on his face I could tell he thought it was petty.
"Why not?" He asked again with strained, artificial calmness.
"When they chase you, once you give in, they'll be bored," I explained in the same strange tone.
"I'll never be bored of you, after seven years, you should know that..." He trailed off waiting for me to explain the rest of my qualifications.
"I can't date musicians," I started slowly, "Because..." I was breathing hard and knew I couldn't finish. Not yet. Ron seemed to notice my feelings because his hand went to my shoulder and he ran his hand over it comfortingly.
"Can we be friends?" He asked slowly. I looked at him slightly surprised.
"We ARE friends," I said.
"Friends don't avoid each other," His voice rumbled seriously.
"I'm sorry... We can be friends," And I knew that I meant it, it wasn't a hollow promise like I had made to Harry about coming to see him, about calling him, about talking to him. This was for real. His face lightened up a little and he got up giving me the same tip-of-the-finger wave he had given the night of the wedding and he exited out the window.
~
I was still thinking about my promise to Ron as I showed up to work, late.
"So what the hell happened?" Charlotte asked once I stepped inside. I sighed rubbing my eyes and trying to shake off the headache that was still lingering.
"It's a long story," I murmured.
"I've got plenty of time," Charlotte insisted. I wasn't biting, I don't know why but this sort of thing just seemed to private, especially when it was about Ron and I. "Come on Herm, you HAVE to tell! I mean you bad-talk dating for months, ever since you got back from that private school, and then you ask me to pick you up a block away from some guy's house? Not only SOME guys house, but if I remember correctly, Nicole and Lane said something about seeing you with the lead singer of the Marauders!" She was practically shrieking now.
"It's not what it sounds like," I finally said, in a tone that was a bit flat.
"Elaborate," She instructed, and now I noticed that Nell and Roy were lingering annoyingly close.
"I got a bit sick, and he took me back to his place for a lie down. Nothing happened, we're just friends," I finally gave in. Nell and Roy looked a bit put-down by this but Charlotte still had that same twinkle in her eye.
"His name wouldn't happen to be Ron, would it?" I swallowed unnaturally hard.
"Maybe," the word slipped out before I could instruct my brain not to let it out. She squealed and Nell and Roy's heads both appeared peaking through the doorway that leads into the kitchen.
"Hold on," Charlotte finally said, a strange look of realization forming on her face, "Does that mean that your best friend from school is lead singer of The Marauders?" I nodded.
"You HAVE to introduce me!" She squealed even louder.
~
"Can we be friends?" His voice was still echoing through my head, as I explained the happenings of the night before to Nell, leaving out a few key parts: Aka. Me kissing Ron, and the whole look thing, and basically all the important stuff.
"Can we be friends?" It continued to echo as I made cappuccinos for a group of teens that seemed to be cutting class.
"Can we be friends?" The words sang as I waved to Roy and Nell, and the newest waitress Lena.
"Can we be friends?" It continued as I walked out to my car.
"Can we be friends?" It asked as I glanced up at the tall red-haired Ron Weasley leaning against my car.
"Hey," I muttered as if we were back at Hogwarts and nothing extraordinary had happened at all. He nodded in response, taking a long gulp from a paper cup with a straw, the kind you get at fast-food places.
"I just got a job at the one-hour-photo, with Dean," He said tilting his head to the building next to the one I had just exited.
"Do you even know what a one-hour-photo is?" I asked skeptically.
"Do now," He said grinning. "Dean does the hard stuff, you know, in the back room, I just work the counter," He raised an eyebrow amusedly.
"Nice," I muttered.
"I was going to work at the gas station with Harry, but they wouldn't hire me," He said sighing.
"Why is that?" I asked.
"That's for me to know, and you to wonder about," He said grinning. I shrugged going over to the driver's side of the car, unlocked it and got in. Ron bent over peering through the passenger side window, he tapped on the window. I rolled it down for him and he popped his head inside.
"Hey, can you give me a ride?" He asked. I was on the verge of saying yes when he pulled a hamburger out of his paper bag and took a bite.
"No food in my car," I said firmly, glancing at the spotless interior.
"Oh come on," He moaned sticking out his bottom lip like a small child. "Either that or I have to walk, or find a secluded place and apperate, but riding in cars is way more fun."
"No food-"
"I know, I know, no food in your car, I understand that, but can't you make an exception for your old FRIEND Ron?" He asked. I sighed knowing I had to, if I wanted to escape more flying-over-bed-attacks. I leaned over to unlock the door but he just pulled it open. I stared at the lock, which was already undone.
"Alohamora, before you came out, just incase you forgot that we're friends," He explained grinning. I rolled my eyes.
"Keep the food in the bag," I ordered as he pulled a handful of French Fries from his bag. He scowled at me before dropping them back in.
"You got really tight after you left didn't you?" He asked.
"What do you mean?" I asked still staring at the road in front of me.
"Well, Harry and I had you pretty loose those last few years of school, but now," He made a high-pitched squeaking noise and snapped his fingers. I turned glancing at him.
"Which way do I turn?" I asked flatly.
"What, you don't remember from when you spent the night?" He asked raising an eyebrow. "Left."
I turned sharply making him slam into the door of the car. He sat up rubbing his shoulder and was quiet for a while. I kept a watch on him out of the corner of my eye, as he tried to sneak a French frie. I smacked his arm and he dropped it back in the bag scowling.
"Your obsessive, did you know that?" He asked.
"At least I'm sane," I countered.
"The world is not perfect and clean Hermione, that's what you need to realize, you need to realize the unevenness of everything, the way that nothing is perfectly symmetrical to anything else," His voice was getting louder and more enthusiastic as he spoke, "Everything is out of the ordinary if you look at it truly. Cleanliness is a myth!" I turned and glared at him.
"Could you be quiet, I'm trying to dr-"
"HERMIONE!" He yelled all of the sudden pointing straight ahead. I whipped my head back to the road to see that I was in the wrong lane, and a truck was heading right for me. I swerved jerkily, ending up in the right lane once again, after a series of loud honks.
When I looked back at Ron to glare at him there was a single French frie sitting on the dashboard.
"Embrace the fact that nothing is perfect, and love the chaos of life," He said loudly. I glared at him picking up the greasy fried potato, rolled down my window and threw it out.
"Ooooh Hermione littered, Hermione's ba-ad," Ron sang grinning and stuffing another French frie in his mouth. I glared at him, grabbed the bag from his hand and threw it out the window too. He stared at me shocked.
"I can't believe you did that! You owe me big time!" He shouted incredulously.
"I'm driving you home, that's my pay-back," I muttered flatly.
"No way, you owe me something way bigger," He insisted, crossing his arms over his chest, and sinking down into the chair.
"Oh God, don't sit there and pout," I yelled.
"I'm not pouting," Ron, mumbled in a sulky voice, as if he were ten years old or something.
"I'm never giving you a ride again," I hissed angrily.
"You know," He said sitting up and getting that same stupid lopsided grin on his face again.
"What?" I asked exhaustedly.
"Being with you is like having a crush on a teacher," I turned and gave him a look, which he just countered with, "Are you going to punish me Mione?"
~
Harry, Seamus and Dean were sitting outside on the porch of the house I had snuck out of earlier that morning; it was a yellow house, roughly the colour of a banana that was just starting to get brown spots. They all started clapping as we drove up the driveway. Ron jumped out giving a deep and then ran around to the driver's side of the car as I was pulling out. He pulled out his wand yelling "Alohamora" at the door, and yanked it open.
"Come on, say hi to everyone at least," He begged.
"Look, I drove you home, isn't that good enough," I asked. He ignored this reply grabbing my hand and trying to pull me out of the car, thus making me lean forward, which lead to me hitting the gas really hard and almost running into the house, Ron running by the side still holding my hand. I hit the break just in time, and turned off the ignition sighing, that was the second time I'd almost killed myself in the car in one day.
I let Ron pull me out of the car and yank me up the steps of the porch. I let Harry hug me, and Seamus and Dean too. I even let Ron introduce me to the dog he had found two days ago, which he had named Chudley, in tribute to his favorite quidditch team. And all the time this was going on, I knew it was happening, but somehow I couldn't make it stop, I was getting stuck again, stuck between the people I loved and the life I wanted. The life where I was normal, where I didn't have to worry.
~
"I can't believe you actually got her to drive you home," Dean said shaking his head as they all walked me back to my car.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked narrowing my eyes at Ron who was making a swift motion with his hand across his neck, the way people do when they want you to shut-up.
"Well we all got off work at the same time, see Harry and I work at the gas station and Dean and Ron work at the One-hour-Fodo," Seamus explained.
"Photo," Dean corrected.
"And we were getting ready to leave, you know, when Ron jumped out of the van and said he was going to get you to drive him home," Harry ended. I looked at Ron who was pretending to be very interested in something on Chudley's head.
"Ron!" I shouted and he looked up as if he hadn't heard anything we had just said.
"You had a ride and you made ME drive you home?" I asked incredulously. He shrugged.
"Wanted to see if you were serious about not avoiding me," He said and the others all seemed to look more interested.
"I said it didn't I?" I asked lowering my voice slightly.
"Yeah, but I wasn't sure if you said it cause you meant it, or if you said it cause you thought you owed me after that kiss."
After that I pretty much died. I walked silently in this stunned way to my car, with all of them following me and shooting me questions and Ron following looking guilty and trying to give me these apologetic looks, which I glared at. I hugged Harry again as I got into the car and pulled away.
I was trapped.
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Thanks for my reviewers and sorry this one took longer to get out. Hope you like it.