THE ALICE CONCEPT
Scene II
Scene- trees. Lots and lots of trees. Daniel appears to have lost his White Rabbit problem and is looking puzzled.
O' Niell: (looking with disgust at the trees): Forget anything I may have said about this place being original.
Carter: What is going on here!?
Teal'c We appear to be in Wonderland MajorCarter.
(Pause while everyone digests the idea of Teal'c reading Lewis Carroll)
O' Niell: Ooookey. If we are all quite finished-and human...lets find another Stargate and blow this popsicle stand.
(They walk on. After a few minutes Carter finds herself alone and inexplicably wearing a blue dress. She sees a light among the trees and heads toward it)
Carter: A lampost?
(A table appears. There are two pills, a red one and a blue one, saying "Eat Me" and "Drink Me" respectivly)
Carter: Huh? (pauses) Will you two shut up already?!
(The pills keep talking and she grabs one in exasperation.)
Carter: I don't know how I'm supposed to Drink you but...
(She swallows it and suddenly feels dizzy)
Carter: What the...Hey! Where did the trees go?! (looks down...and further down)
Carter: Oh.
There is a small sad green patch around her ankles. She reaches down for the other pill hoping it will shrink her again. A crazed feathery thing attacks her.
Pigeon: SNAKE!!! (pecks madly at her)
(She bats it and it ends up somewhere over Saturday. Shes now lost the pill and finds herself crying)
Carter: Stoppit! You've drowned the forest and your now in a lake!
A door floats past with a woman on it and a man clinging to her. She is peeling his fingers off)
Rose: I will never let go- I promise...Gerroff!
(She spots the floating Red Pill and swoops down on it)
O' Niell (appearing suddenly at the edge of the lake): Carter! Quit ruining the landscape!
Carter( swallows the screaming Red Pill and steps out returning to normal size as she does so): Yes Sir!
Daniel: We found someone while you were away (pulls out a giant hookah with a cigar-smoking caterpiller attached to the end)
Daniel: You remember Senator Kinsey, don't you Sam?
Carter: Since when was Senator Kinsey a caterpiller?
(O'Niell opens his mouth)
Daniel(hurriedly): No no, he's the hookah- don't know where the bug is from (turns to Kinsey) Why are you a hookah?
Caterpiller: You want the truth? I'm the interpreter and I say YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!
(shifts cigar to other side of mouth and chews it, glaring at SG1)
Hookah: #puff# Mmph!
Caterpiller (grumpily): He says, 'Talk to the Cheshire Cat' (They vanish)
END OF SCENE II
Scene II
Scene- trees. Lots and lots of trees. Daniel appears to have lost his White Rabbit problem and is looking puzzled.
O' Niell: (looking with disgust at the trees): Forget anything I may have said about this place being original.
Carter: What is going on here!?
Teal'c We appear to be in Wonderland MajorCarter.
(Pause while everyone digests the idea of Teal'c reading Lewis Carroll)
O' Niell: Ooookey. If we are all quite finished-and human...lets find another Stargate and blow this popsicle stand.
(They walk on. After a few minutes Carter finds herself alone and inexplicably wearing a blue dress. She sees a light among the trees and heads toward it)
Carter: A lampost?
(A table appears. There are two pills, a red one and a blue one, saying "Eat Me" and "Drink Me" respectivly)
Carter: Huh? (pauses) Will you two shut up already?!
(The pills keep talking and she grabs one in exasperation.)
Carter: I don't know how I'm supposed to Drink you but...
(She swallows it and suddenly feels dizzy)
Carter: What the...Hey! Where did the trees go?! (looks down...and further down)
Carter: Oh.
There is a small sad green patch around her ankles. She reaches down for the other pill hoping it will shrink her again. A crazed feathery thing attacks her.
Pigeon: SNAKE!!! (pecks madly at her)
(She bats it and it ends up somewhere over Saturday. Shes now lost the pill and finds herself crying)
Carter: Stoppit! You've drowned the forest and your now in a lake!
A door floats past with a woman on it and a man clinging to her. She is peeling his fingers off)
Rose: I will never let go- I promise...Gerroff!
(She spots the floating Red Pill and swoops down on it)
O' Niell (appearing suddenly at the edge of the lake): Carter! Quit ruining the landscape!
Carter( swallows the screaming Red Pill and steps out returning to normal size as she does so): Yes Sir!
Daniel: We found someone while you were away (pulls out a giant hookah with a cigar-smoking caterpiller attached to the end)
Daniel: You remember Senator Kinsey, don't you Sam?
Carter: Since when was Senator Kinsey a caterpiller?
(O'Niell opens his mouth)
Daniel(hurriedly): No no, he's the hookah- don't know where the bug is from (turns to Kinsey) Why are you a hookah?
Caterpiller: You want the truth? I'm the interpreter and I say YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!
(shifts cigar to other side of mouth and chews it, glaring at SG1)
Hookah: #puff# Mmph!
Caterpiller (grumpily): He says, 'Talk to the Cheshire Cat' (They vanish)
END OF SCENE II