A.N.- This is going really slow..and I apologize for that. Ah, well. I'm pleased with the results so far, even I am just a few chapters into it. I've put forth a lot of time in this story. So, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and the ones to come.
Chapter 3.
Terra awoke to find Yuffie shaking her shoulder gently, holding the clothes Terra would wear. She couldn't say why, but she had, for some reason, moved into Yuffie's home. She wanted to know where her mother was, and why she wasn't at Yuffie's with them. She sat up, rubbing her eyes, and looked up at Yuffie.
"Yuffie, why are you waking us so early? We goin' somewhere or somethin'?"
"Hm? Oh, yes. I'm taking you to see your mother today. It's been about a week, hasn't it? In any case, I have some business to settle with Uncle Barret." She replied quickly. "And I've told you about talking properly. None of this "somethin', or nothin' or gettin'. You hear me?"
"Um..yea, sure, Yuffie. I'll be sure to watch it next time. Hm…you've been up there recently, haven't you? Is she doing okay? She seems to have been doing much worse since my father left…"
Yuffie was now over on the other side of the room, getting the things Terra would want to bring with her. At Terra's question, she was silent for a moment, considering her words with a bitter expression on her face.
"You will see how your mother is doing once we're there." She replied sharply.
Terra glared at Yuffie…she was never this cold with her. Why now? She couldn't think of these things right now, though. She had to get up and get ready to see her mother. Slowly, she rose out of bed, and went over to the dresser to get her clothes.
* * *
Yuffie walked up to Barret's front door, and looked behind her to see if Terra was still with her. She felt kind of bad about earlier that morning. She was never harsh with the child…surely she would understand. She shrugged it off, and knocked on the door. She could hear the clicking of locks being undone, and heavy footsteps shuffling on the floor. The door swung open to reveal the burly presence of Barrette. The large man stepped aside and opened the door wide for her and the girls to come in.
"Bout time you've brought 'em. Tifa's been real bad lately.." Barret said, feeling the rush of cool air invade his home
"I know, Barret. Sorry. We've been busy the last week or so…" Yuffie replied, herding the little girl inside. Once inside, she took her coat off and watched Terra run up the stairs with Marlene. Once sure they were out of hearing range, she turned to Barret and watched as he shut the door, and took her coat to the coat rack. She paused before saying the next few words..
"Barret, I'm worried about Terra..I was a little harsh with her this morning, and she's been acting odd ever since. This must be very traumatic for her… with Cloud gone, and her living with someone other than her mother….I just…I don't know what to do. They both left the care of their child with me, and I am but 19. I can't take care of this child. With how young she is…I almost wish Nanaki were here. He'd know what to do, ya know?" She sadly shook her head, with sorrow in her steel gray eyes.
Barret walked into the living room, and sat in the huge chair that was made for him, motioning for the young woman to come with. She came in and took a seat on the large couch. "Yuffie, don't beat yerself up ova' this. They wouldn't have put the care of their child in ya if they didn't trust ya with their hearts and souls. You've grown into a fine young woman. Betta' than that pesky 16 year old I used to know, anyways. But you've changed, and I'm 'fraid some of them might be for the worst. I mean, look, ya have dark circles unda' yer eyes.", Yuffie looked down at her hands, not saying a word and yet taking it all in, thanking whatever gods their may be that they had blessed her to have met people like him.
Their conversation was interrupted as they heard light footfalls descending the staircase. A few moments later, Tifa rounded the corner and leaned against the doorframe. She simply stood there, looking at the two of them. She looked horrible, Yuffie noted. Her hair was unkempt, and she had dark circles under her eyes. Her eyes themselves were bloodshot, from all the crying, Yuffie guessed. She simply looked exhausted.
"Come on in, Tifa. Yuff brought Terra on over…figured it might be time for ya ta see 'er." Barret motioned with his hand for her to come in.
Yuffie watched as Tifa simply nodded in acknowledgement. She slowly made her way across the small living room, and finally over to the couch. She plopped down next to Yuffie, leaned her head back, and sighed. Yuffie glanced over at Barret with a sad look in her eyes….so this is what true love can do to people, when its been shattered..in a way, she never wanted to fall in love…but then she did. She didn't understand any of it. Barret only shrugged sadly. Yuffie looked down at the young woman's hand and clasped it in her own, and squeezed it tightly, hoping to give her friend some small comfort. She was rewarded with a slight squeeze of recognition. Yuffie let a small smile play across her lips, then made it vanish as quickly as it had come.
"I don't know what to do with my life anymore.." Tifa suddenly said, her voice raspy, and hollow. "Cloud is gone…" she reclaimed her hand from Yuffie's grasp and leaned up, her back bent, with her face in her hands " I can't take care of Terra like he wanted me to... all I ever think about is that damn bastard." She took her face out of her hands, and ran a hand through the mass of uncombed brunette hair, swallowed the lump in her throat and fought back the tears invading her vision once again. Once she had regained her composure, she continued with the rare speech. "All I ever wanted, since the day I met the man, was to grow up with him, have a family..be loved by him. Not even that could be granted to me." She laughed bitterly at this " My parents were killed…I almost got killed…" She paused for few moments, and Yuffie cast Barret a worried look. He was as helpless as she. "But oh no…" The tears finally won her over, and the next few lines were said in a cold fury, with the tears streaming down her cheeks once again. " We had to meet that bitch, Aeris. She ruined every fucking thing. Cloud fell in love with her, not the plain, average Tifa Lockhart. He had always told me I was so much more than an average girl. But in comparison with Aeris…"
"Now, Tifa.." Barret started, but Tifa interrupted him in a way that gave Barret a look of disbelief and made Yuffie back away.
Tifa jumped up from her spot, and made her way to the middle of the room, to where they could both see her clearly.
"All I ever did was love him! All I ever did was show how much I cared! I don't deserve any of this! And you both know it." She was shrieking these words, her face flushed and her eyes had an almost cynical look in them. " Then he had to go after that flower girl we met in the slums!! She's dead though! He's left his wife..his little girl…for a dream…even if I almost know he will come back with her…." The last few words had been said in a whisper, and then she collapsed to the floor. She was sobbing now, in a crumbled heap on the floor. She was pitiful, Yuffie realized. Barret rushed over to the small woman, gathered her in his arms, and made his way for the stairs. She watched as Tifa clung to Barrets huge shoulder, crying bitterly.
Yuffie followed up the narrow staircase after Barret, her face white from Tifa's outburst. It was cooler as they made their way the staircase, which was odd to her. Normally it would be warmer….thankfully it wasn't. They'd made their way to the second floor, and before following Barret into Tifa's room, she headed for Marlene's room to check on the girls. She got to the door and slowly cracked it open, then peeked inside. They were watching a movie. Good. They most likely hadn't heard Tifa's outburst…Terra would have come down to investigate, if they had. She slowly shut the door back, and headed over to Tifa's room.
As she made her way down the hall, she noticed it wasn't very homely. She had never taken the time to really examine Barret's home. She'd always been busy taking care of things with Barret. The walls were simply white washed, and no pictures anywhere, really. There were a few tables lining the walls, with the occasional picture of Marlene. The floors were bare, and hardwood, obviously. There was a hall light hanging from a chain attached to the ceiling. It was a cold light, which was unusual. It did nothing to put a little warmth in the hallway, like most lamps of the sort did. Perhaps it was because the walls were white….she didn't know. She did know, however, that she would have to talk to Barret about this place. She shrugged and then continued on her way down the hall, passing the bathroom.
As she reached Tifa's room, she heard her weeping softly, and the sound of Barret's baritone voice comforting her…quite an odd experience. She pushed the door open with her fingertips, and quietly crept into the room. It wasn't lighted very well….only a few candles burned, and a tiny night-light was glowing. The room was relatively cool, and more furnished than the rest of the house she had seen. A plush, dark purple rug covered the floor, and the walls were a dark red. There was a full sized bed, with plenty of blankets on it. A night side table was on the right of the bed, and an unused lamp sat atop it. On the other side of the room, sat a desk with a large mirror hanging on the wall. On the desk sat a brush, comb, and some makeup. Next to the mirror on the left, there was a window. No sunlight came in though, because Tifa had it covered with black curtains.
Barret looked over as he heard Yuffie enter, then had a look on his face that basically said, " Please come take of this…I can't do it." She nodded and walked over to the bed, and as she did, Barret rose from his place on the bed, allowing Yuffie a spot to sit. She took her seat, and embraced the shaking Tifa in her arms, stroking the woman's brunette hair. Barret quietly slipped out of the room, and left the two women by themselves. Yuffie really didn't know what to do..the brunette wouldn't stop crying into her shoulder, or gripping her arm until the nails cut into Yuffie's flesh.
After a few moments of silence, except the soft sound of Tifa's weeping, Yuffie decided to finally say something to try and comfort the woman. She racked her brain for something that might seem appropriate for this kind of situation, and all she could come up with was, "Shh..it's ok, Tifa.."A few moments after Yuffie had whispered that into the trembling Tifa's hair, her frail friend had pulled back, and wiped the tears off her check hastily with the back of her hand. For a moment, she simply stared at the floor, with a far away look on her eyes and a look on her face like she was having some inner struggle. Slowly she raised her head up, and averted her gaze from the floor to Yuffie. Soon, she began to speak, hardly above a whisper.
"I don't know what to do anymore, Yuffie..I..it's almost like I feel I have no reason to really live anymore, except for Terra, of course. I'm not even sure that can keep me going for the rest of my life..I know I need to get over it..I mean, hell, it's been a few weeks now, hasn't it? I don't even keep up with the days anymore. I have no reason to. And..I'm…well, to be honest..Im scared of Aeris coming back. I don't know why. I just am.." She looked back down at the floor, hanging her head. She didn't know why, but Tifa wasn't crying..she knew that if that were her, she'd be bawling. Of course, Yuffie had to take into consideration the fact that Tifa had been pretty much crying the whole two or so weeks.
Tifa looked back up at Yuffie and sighed deeply, taking her hand and clasping it. " I want to apologize for the way I acted earlier…it's just…so much pressure. Not from anyone else, I know. But I suppose from my own self. I've been blaming myself for this the whole time. I'll sit up in bed until 4:00 in the morning, asking myself questions like, " What did I do to make him not love me? What could I have done to change his mind about going to find her? Has he been lying to me this whole time?" she shook her head sadly and gripped Yuffie's hand tighter " But the truth is..he did love me. I know that now. Oh, how could I have doubted him? Nevermind that. But..I couldn't have done a thing to change it. I suppose it feels good to know that it wasn't my fault. And that he didn't see anything wrong with me. Because, if he did, I would have known about it. You know Cloud. He would've let someone know…and they would have told me. But listen. Basically, I just wanna say that I am sorry for the way I've been acting for the last few weeks. And I'm ready to get out again. Stop dwelling on the past. It just isn't like me, is it?"
Yuffie grinned at Tifa and hugged the woman tightly, overjoyed that her friend would be okay. "Tifa, I have missed you so much. And your little angel has, too. I've been so worried about you, you know that? Of course you do. Who am I kidding?" She hugged the woman tighter and Tifa smiled with tears in her eyes. But, these weren't the tears she had been racking from her body this past week or so. These were the tears of happiness. Oh, how good it felt cry these tears!
"But, uh, Tifa…" she giggled softly " you've not eaten the whole time! You're even skinner now than you were before! If that's even possible!" Tifa pushed herself away from Yuffie, trying her hardest to look mad.
"Oh, like you're one to talk, miss 98 lbs."
"98!? Hmpf. Okay, look, let's go see Barret and the kids, how 'bout that? They deserve more time with you than I do. So c'mon. Let's go." She grabbed Tifa up off the bed by her wrist, and looked at the woman for a moment. "Ya know, your hair looks like a rats nest..hasn't been brushed in forever, has it? Haha." She walked over to the desk and grabbed Tifa's hairbrush, then handed it to her. " Here, you brush it. I don't like people brushing mine, and I'm not sure I could brush yours."
Tifa took the hairbrush and smiled sweetly at Yuffie, though it was one of the most sarcastic smiles Yuffie had seen in her 19 years. "Oh, I love you too, Yuff." She rolled her eyes and turned to the mirror, and started stroking the brush through her hair, every now and then coming across a troublesome knot. Tifa examined her body as she brushed her hair. Yes, she looked older. She had circles under her eyes, and her face was gaunt now. Lack of food, she supposed. Her small lips were cracked and dry. Her hair was no longer a 'rats nest', though. That was a good thing. Her body was much smaller than before, if that was possible. Her ribs and hipbones stuck out unbecomingly now. But, ah yes, her colour was back. She no longer looked dead. The shine was back in her eyes as well. Not the dull look that had been there before. She had had no idea that not eating or doing anything for a week could be so..disastrous upon your body. Perhaps it was not only that. Who knew? All she knew, was that Tifa Lockhart was coming back to life. Regardless if half of her really didn't want to. She put the brush down and turned around to face Yuffie.
"So. Shall we be on our way?" Yuffie smiled and held the door open for her friend to exit.
"What, do ya think I'm too weak to hold open the door or something? Geez." Tifa walked through quickly, grinning. "In anycase, thanks. C'mon. I want to see my baby."
They made their way down the hall and then up the stairs. Along the way, the two women made a conversation about Barret's decorating.
"You know, Yuff, Barret really needs to learn how to decorate. I wonder why Marlene doesn't say anything. Surely that child has enough sense to realize this place needs to help. Don't you think?"
"Oh, most definatly. I took notice of it when I got here. First time I've actually, you know, looked at the place. Its so….bare. I dunno. Your room is the only decent one in this house. Marlenes is just a wreck. That child is about 11 now. You'd think she'd care about the way her room is. Course, you know, she's grown up in bad times….seen a lot of things. She for sure isn't like other children. She might see things differently. I'm willing to bet that has something to do with it."
"Possibly. But I'll have to talk to good ole' Mr. Barret and see if we can't get him to do something about this place. It's horrible. I don't see how I came to live here for as long as I have." They both grinned and lowered their voices as they neared the children's room. Barret was most likely in there, talking with the three girls. Tifa walked up to the door quietly and knocked on it, waiting there patiently. They heard the heavy footfalls of Barret striding across the floor. The door swung open and a disgruntled looking Barret stood in the doorway. His eyes bulged as he looked at Tifa standing there with a grin on her face.
"T-Tifa! Are you okay? I mean..you're..you're Tifa again!" She simply smiled at him, then suddenly threw her arms around the huge mans neck. He was stunned for a moment, not sure of the woman's actions. He then patted her back softly and embraced the girl in his huge arms. Tifa was crying again, but they weren't the tears of misery they had all grown so used to.
"Thank you so much, Barret. You have no idea how much this has meant to me." She broke the embrace and stood back, wiping the tears from her eyes. She then looked past his shoulder into the room, then back at him.
"Oh, I'm okay, Barret. Don't worry about me. Anyways, how are the girls in there?"