Title: Letter to Hermione
Author: Audrey (booksmartbrilliance@yahoo.com)
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Summary: Ron's forced to come to terms with his feelings at the news of Hermione's engagement. Can he talk her out of marrying someone else? Can he talk her into marrying him instead?
A/N: Well, I thought one more chapter of this would do it, but it's just not turning out that way. This chapter dedicated to Rupert Lover who inspired me to update this story. Sunkist, thank you so much for your encouragement and help.
* * * *
Andrew Nordman rolled over and looked at the clock. He heard the knock on his door again and wearily reached over for his glasses. He stumbled to the front door of his expensive flat, stubbing his toe on the coffee table in the living room in the process. He limped the rest of the way to the door and peeked through the peephole to see Hermione standing nervously in the hall. He opened the door quickly, panic making his heart race.
"Hermione, what's wrong?" He asked. She looked up at him and before he even had a chance to move she had launched herself at him and was kissing him fiercely. She pushed him in the flat shutting the door behind her. She broke away from him her eyes searching his. The intensity of the kiss. and now her eyes, threw him off a bit.
Not knowing what else to do, he grinned nervously at her. "It was the paisley pajamas, wasn't it? Women can't resist paisley."
She frowned at him, her face looking troubled. His grin disappeared instantly, "Hermione..."
"I love you," she whispered more to herself than to him. "I do."
"I love you too," he said, frowning down at his fiance. "Now what brought all this on? Is everything okay?"
She looked up at him smiling weakly, "Fine."
"Don't lie to me," he said, leading her to a couch. "I can always tell when you're lying, your mouth twitches slightly."
"It does not."
"It does. Now what's wrong?"
She sighed and began to speak but faltered at the first word. "I..."
He waited for her to go on, but she didn't.
"Whatever it is, you can tell me," He said softly, wrapping an arm around her.
"I don't know what's wrong with me. It's nothing really..." she said, looking up at him. "It's completely insane."
"What?"
"Ron...you remember Ron, don't you?"
"Weasley? Your best friend?"
"Yes," she whispered. She cleared her throat, "Well he's in love with me."
Andrew blinked. "He's what?"
"He says he loves me," she said, angrily wiping away a tear.
Andrew didn't know what to say. Inside he felt like someone had kicked him in the stomach. Was this goodbye? Was she throwing everything away? He reached over and wiped her cheek dry, "Well, he'd have to be insane not to."
"It isn't funny," she said looking up at him. "He's being completely ridiculous."
"Is he?"
"Yes," she said exasperated, "You men just don't get it."
Andrew smiled, "I guess we don't. Do you...do you love him?"
"Of course, I love him," Hermione said, tears filling her eyes, "He's my oldest friend..." Andrew felt his heart stop inside his chest, she looked up at him. "I-I love him like a brother."
Andrew let out the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding.
"I just...I don't want to lose his friendship over something so stupid. He's been there for me for the last twelve years. I can't imagine my life without him."
Andrew leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. "If he really loves you, Hermione. He'll know when to let you go."
* * * *
"Bloody hell, I'm sorry, mate," Seamus said, frowning down at his hands. "I thought I was doing you a favor."
Ron sighed. He was sitting, fully clothed, across from Seamus nursing his whiskey. "I know, but now what? She's getting married and I've ruined everything."
"Did she say that she had feelings for you?"
"Do you think she's going to walk out on her own wedding for me? Who am I? I'm nobody!" Ron cried, his words slightly slurred. Seamus knew only too well that he tended to over do it when he was upset. "I don't have a million galleons, I don't have a PhD in Arthmancy. I can't do anything witty or charming. All I know how to do is catch criminals and even that is fifty percent blind luck. I couldn't even save Harry..."
"Ron," Seamus said surprised. Ron never talked about Harry's death. "Harry wasn't your fault."
"The hell it wasn't. I should have been there. I shouldn't have let him go on alone..." Ron looked down at his drink and cleared his throat. "You didn't see her face, Seamus. You didn't see the way she looked when I had to tell her..." He shuddered and took a swig of his drink. "Damn it. I wish Harry was here. He would know what to do."
Seamus frowned at his partner of two years, slightly disturbed at the guilt that Ron still carried about Harry's death. Ron never talked about it, but Seamus had assumed that he had come to terms long ago with the fact that there was nothing he could have done. "Harry isn't here, though, is he?"
Ron sighed, "No. He isn't."
"It's just you and Hermione."
"She's all I have left," Ron said softly. "All I have left to remind me of the way things were before....everything. I told myself I'd never leave her. I gave her space, I didn't want to get too close, I didn't want to let her down, I didn't want to hurt her again, but I never left her." Ron said looking earnestly at Seamus. "I never thought she'd leave me."
"Ron," Seamus said, twisting the ring on his finger nervously. "Do you really love her or are you afraid of losing her...like you lost Harry?"
Ron didn't answer for a long time and Seamus squirmed uncomfortably in his seat. He may have taken things too far this time. Finally, he couldn't take the silence any longer and began to apologize, "I'm sorry, Ron. I had no right to --"
"I am afraid of losing her," Ron said quietly, cutting him off. "I miss her sometimes as much as I miss Harry. I miss the intimacy we used to have, the closeness we used to share. After the war I couldn't look at her without being reminded of what things used to be like, when we were okay. I wanted to protect her from ever getting hurt like that again, especially by me. Maybe I didn't show it enough, or I didn't know how, but I do love her. I thought I was doing the right thing, but now I see that I was the one keeping us apart. I was the one that broke it off."
"She's not married yet," Seamus said.
Ron shook his head, "No, but she's right it's too late."
"You're just going to give up. Just like that." Seamus asked, unable to believe Ron Weasley was giving in so easily.
"She's made her decision," Ron said quietly. "I'm not going to stand in her way."
* * * * *
Hermione awoke to find herself alone in Andrew's large bed. She glanced at the clock and sighed at the late morning hour. It wasn't the first time she had awakened in his bed, but it always took her a moment to recall where she was exactly. She sat up as last night came rushing back to her. She had fought with Ron and then she had come here.
Ron. She felt like hiding her head under the covers and never coming out. Why did he have to complicate everything? He had always been so infuriating. Even when they had been back at Hogwarts it seemed he had done things just to get a rise out of her. He always knew exactly what to say or do to get her defensive or angry.
That wasn't completely true, though, and she knew it. He also knew what to say when she didn't even know what she needed to hear. He never minced words with her. He never tried to spare her feelings the way Harry had. She had hated him for it and then she had begun to love him for it. In their sixth year when Ron had nearly been killed by Death Eaters she had realized that she cared for him more than she ought. She had realized then that she loved the way he knew how to push her buttons, the way he understood her. She had only been sixteen, but she had known that her feelings toward her red headed best friend was more than just friendship. The sight of Harry didn't make her heart speed up, or her skin didn't go all warm and tingly at his touch the way it did with Ron. She had loved Harry, just as much as she loved Ron, but just in different ways.
Then Harry died and everything had changed. She couldn't talk to Ron anymore. It was almost as if he had put up this wall around himself and he wouldn't let her in. A couple of weeks later they had decided to go their separate ways. It had been almost a year before she even thought about seeing someone else. In a way, she thought her heart was mourning not only for Harry, but for Ron, who was never the same afterwards.
Over the years Ron and her had grown apart. They still owled one another occasionally, but they were far from being the close friends that they had once been. Then Andrew had come along and swept her off her feet. Ginny thought he was idealistic because of his handsome looks and unlimited funds, but Hermione loved him for entirely different reasons. She felt comfortable with him, like she could tell him anything. At times he reminded her very much of Harry. He made her laugh, he made her smile and when he looked at her, she could see how much he loved her. He was intelligent and never used his wealth as an excuse to turn his back on those less fortunate.
She didn't know what she had been thinking of when she had gone to see Ron last night. She had been so angry at him. She had been so confused. She wished she had never gone to see him, had just owled him instead. She couldn't get him out of her mind as she kept replaying their fight over and over again.
"Why not? What's the big deal?"
That's what he had asked her. He didn't know. He really didn't know how much she had loved him. He didn't know of the nights she had cried herself to sleep. He didn't know that he had threatened to tear everything she had tried to rebuild in the last five years down with one letter. He had no idea.
And there was only one way that she would be able to go through with this, and that was to make sure he never had any idea. She was doing the right thing, the smart thing. She would marry Andrew.
* * * * *
A/N: More to come. Next chapter won't be so angsty, promise. Don't forget to review!