Title: No Angel, Chapter Two: 'Slide'
Author: Margaret Brown, aka Andromeda Valentine
Fandom: Andromeda
Pairing: Beka/Rommie
Rating: PG-13 as posted here. (NC-17 in its entirety on my site and elsewhere...)
Status: New (06-11-02); Complete
Archive: Yes to list archives, anyone else please ask first.
Feedback: Yes, please!!
E-mail address for feedback: andromeda_valentine@hotmail.com
Series/Sequel: No Angel
Other Websites: Crimson Redd -
Disclaimers: Characters and lyrics not mine - they belong to Tribune and Dido Armstrong, respectively...

Summary: Rommie has a breakdown and Beka helps her put the pieces back together. This part: Beka and Rommie have a little talk...

Notes/Warnings: See Chapter One for notes, etc. Also, be prepared for a not-so-nice take on Dylan - he's not perfect, especially in this story...

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Chapter Two - 'Slide'

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She's all laughter and energy the next morning, like she'd never cried herself to sleep in my arms the night before. I don't believe it for a minute, of course - I know her too well - but I don't think she expects me to.

So I let her talk while I fix myself breakfast - I'd rather have her manic than despondent, anyway, and I need the time to think. This is a hell of a mess they've both gotten themselves into, and fixing it's going to hurt like hell for all of us.

Silence fall suddenly as she runs out of small talk, and I let it linger as I drink my coffee. I'm not looking forward to this conversation - I'm not good at being cruel to be kind, and the thought of hurting her, even for her own good, is almost more than I can handle right now.

Even on a day like this, when you're crawling on the floor,
reaching for the phone to ring anyone who knows you anymore...
It's all right to make mistakes, you're only human.
Inside, everybody's hiding something.

Finally, I speak, steeling myself for her inevitable reaction. "He *does* love you - you know that, right?"

She stares at me for a long moment, eyes gone cold, before finally looking away. "Do you know what they call me, Beka? His whore - obedient, eminently fuckable, and oh-so-eager to please."

"Rommie..." I've heard that before - been called the same things by some of the same people, actually - but it never phased me because it wasn't true. Something about that thought nags at me, though - she's hiding something, I can tell by her voice. "What is it you aren't telling me?"

Staring at the same four walls - have you tried to help yourself?
The rings around your eyes they don't hide that you need to get some rest.
It's all right to make mistakes, you're only human.
Inside, everybody's hiding something.
Take time to catch your breath and choose your moment.

She stares at the table, not even looking up at me, and I can barely hear her. "I... saved myself for him. Waited until he decided he wanted me, so I could show him how I felt." She cracks then, tears streaking down her face. "It was supposed to fix everything..."

My heart twists painfully at that to match the painful twisting in my stomach. Christ... this is exactly what I was hoping *wouldn't* happen. "He freaked, didn't he?"

Don't slide...

Don't slide...

Don't ... slide...

Don't slide...

Slide...

Slide...

She looks up at me, anger suddenly replacing tears. "He took what he wanted, and left me to wake up alone. Then he had the nerve to tell me that it never happened." She laughs then, and my heart twists again at the bitterness behind it. "You were right - they tell you anything they think will get them into your bed, and then leave you the next morning." Then her anger falters, and she's suddenly back to tears.

I walk over and put my arms around her. "Listen to me, Rommie. You have to come back to the Andromeda, at least long enough to deal with this. Running away will only make it worse."

I wipe the tears off her cheeks then, hoping my smile doesn't look as forced as it feels. "Tell you what - we're paid up here for a week whether or not we stay. I say we stay here and give you a few days to get it together before we go back. If you want to leave again after everything's said and done, I won't stop you, and I won't help Dylan find you. But," I pause, "you *do* have to come back first and deal with this. It's the only way to put it behind you and make a clean start."

She sits silently for several long seconds, thinking it over, and finally nods. I'd be relieved, if I could actually pick out a single emotion from the general maelstrom of them inside me right now.

"Good." I say, forcing another smile as I start picking up the kitchen. "Now go get dressed - we're going to go out and have some fun today, seeing as we're on vacation."

Even at a time like this when the morning seems so far,
you think pain belongs to you, but it's happened to us all.
It's all right to make mistakes, you're only human.
Inside, everybody's hiding something.
Take time to catch your breath and choose your moment.

The coffee cup in my hand - thankfully empty - hits the wall as soon as she's out of the room, and I feel a dull momentary sense of amusement when I realize it was Dylan's.

Then my legs give out on me, and I sink to the floor, shaking with rage, jealousy, and pain as two years of carefully suppressed emotions catch up with me.

Don't slide...

Don't slide...

Don't ... slide...

Don't slide...

Slide...

Slide...

I don't know what the hell I'm thinking. I can't fix this, and I sure as hell can't pretend to be just a concerned friend for an entire week. Not when all I can think of is kissing those tears away, and-

You brought this on yourself and it's high time you left it there.
Lie here and rest your head, and dream of something else instead...

I bang my head against the wall to break that train of thought as I will myself to get it together. This isn't about me, and I'm not going to let myself screw things up any further than they already are by getting stupid just when she needs me most...

Don't slide...

Don't ... slide...

Don't slide...

Slide...

Slide...