Title: No Angel V - 'Here With Me'
Author: Margaret Brown, aka Andromeda Valentine
Fandom: Andromeda
Pairing: Beka/Rommie
Rating: PG-13 as posted here. (NC-17 in its entirety on my site and elsewhere...)
Status: New (04/12/03); complete
Archive: Yes to list archives, anyone else please ask first.
Feedback: Yes, please!!
E-mail address for feedback: andromeda_valentine@hotmail.com
Series/Sequel: No Angel
Other Websites: Crimson Redd -
Disclaimers: Not mine, never will be - Beka and Rommie belong to Tribune, and the lyrics belong to Dido Armstrong...
Summary: Rommie has a breakdown and Beka helps her put the pieces back together. This part: 'Morning after' confessions as decisions are made...
Notes: See Chapter One for notes, etc.
Warnings: Femmeslash (duh) and a not-so-nice take on Dylan...
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Chapter Five - 'Here With Me'
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Morning finds me with my very own Sleeping Beauty snuggled against me, sound asleep, and lost in pleasant dreams by the half-smile on her face.
I can't resist the urge to hold her just a little closer as I trace out the slope of a cheekbone and the slight curve of her lips. You'd think I'd be immune to her beauty after seeing her day after day, but she's so perfect, so precious, that it's impossible not to feel it every time I see her.
God, I've got it bad. For once, though, I don't care... Brutal emotional honesty may not be my most dominant trait, but Valentine Smart *knows* when to accept fact as fact and concede defeat.
I didn't hear you leave -
I wonder how am I still here...
And I don't want to move a thing -
it might change my memory.
I smile to myself as I try and crawl out of the bed without waking her. If I hurry, I can get food and coffee before she wakes up - God knows I'll need them if today goes anything like last night. I smile again and glance over at her as I slip on my robe.
The strange thing is how I feel a twinge of loneliness the minute she's out of my arms...
Oh, I am what I am,
I'll do what I want,
but I can't hide...
I force myself to look honestly at the whole situation as I wander to the galley and start making a quick breakfast while my coffee brews. Unfortunately, I'm still running myself in mental circles even as I linger over my coffee cup after eating...
I'm fairly sure she'll make it through setting things right with Dylan - if she stumbles, I'll catch her and help her see things through for her own good. And hope that I can take it if that help sends her straight back into Dylan's arms.
Ouch... Emotional honesty is real bitch...
And who knew I'd ever care about someone enough to want *their* happiness more than mine?
And I won't go, I won't sleep,
I can't breathe,
until you're resting here with me.
And I won't leave, and I can't hide...
I cannot be,
until you're resting here with me...
"BEKA??!!"
The sheer panic in Rommie's voice sends me flying out of my seat into a full run, adrenaline mercifully blocking out the pain of scalding coffee splashing all over my hands.
She's huddled in the middle of the bed, arms wrapped around her knees as she rocks to and fro disconsolately, and I screech to a halt as I try and figure out what the hell could have happened to upset her this badly.
Dropping the coffee mug onto the nearest flat surface, I scramble over to put my arms around her. "It's okay, baby, I'm here. What's wrong?"
"I woke up and you weren't here..."
Fuck. Not your smoothest move, Bek.
I don't want to call my friends,
for they might wake me from this dream.
And I can't leave this bed,
and risk forgetting all that's been.
I just hold her even closer, cursing Dylan yet again for what he did. "I'm sorry, baby, I didn't mean for you to wake up alone - I was in the galley getting breakfast. I figured I'd be back before you even missed me."
She doesn't respond, but her crying softens a little and she stops shaking quite so badly. Long minutes pass as she finally calms back down, and when she looks up at me, her expression is a mixture of confusion and wonder.
"You didn't leave me."
Oh, I am what I am,
I'll do what I want,
but I can't hide...
I'm not sure which makes me angrier - the fact that someone not abandoning her is news, or that she even thought I would ever do that to her - but I manage, for once in my life, to push my anger aside.
She's got reason to be this insecure, and God knows even *I* can't figure out what to make of what happened between us.
And I won't go, I won't sleep,
and I can't breathe,
until you're resting here with me.
And I won't leave, and I can't hide...
I cannot be,
until you're resting here...
"Beka, about last night-" she starts, breaking off suddenly at my yelp of pain when she takes one of my hands.
They're both bright pink and already starting to blister. Christ, how hot *was* that coffee? Good thing I never actually drank it...
"Be right back." she says, touching my cheek before dashing off for the medkit.
What? The? Hell? I am now *officially* confused...
And I won't go, and I won't sleep,
and I can't breathe,
until you're resting here with me.
And I won't leave, and I can't hide...
I cannot be,
until you're resting here with me...
She returns with a dermal regenerator - a lovely little piece of equipment that'll repair the burned skin in minutes - and goes to work on my hands.
"How did you burn yourself this badly?"
I just smile sheepishly. "Running with hot coffee - I'd just pulled it out of the microwave when you called for me. I panicked and ran back here with the cup still in my hands. Freaking microwave must be screwing up again - shouldn't have been that hot."
Oh, I am what I am,
I'll do what I want,
but I can't hide...
She stops and just stares at me. "You were that worried? About me?"
I flash her a smile. "I can't help it - you have that effect on me."
There are about a billion things I want to say suddenly, and not one of them will actually come out.
And I won't go, I won't sleep,
and I can't breathe,
until you're resting here with me.
And I won't leave, and I can't hide...
I cannot be,
until you're resting here...
Finally, words start tumbling past my lips, strangely echoing her words earlier.
"Rommie, about last night - I liked it. A lot. So much so that I don't want it to end."
To my surprise, she seems to go almost weak with relief. "I was hoping you'd say that. I know that I'm all screwed up right now, but-"
I pull her onto my lap, needing suddenly to feel her close. "No, babe, you're perfect, just like you are, trust me..."
I'm about to try and explain exactly *how* perfect I think she is, but then I realize - finally - that she's *still* stark naked from last night and decide to let my hands (and mouth) speak for me...
And I won't go, and I won't sleep,
and I can't breathe,
until you're resting here with me.
And I won't leave, and I can't hide...
I cannot be,
until you're resting here with me...