Disc.! I don't own fabulous leader Isaac, stupid Garet, don't own scary psychic person, don't own sickeningly happy girl, or any other Golden Sunners! Do not own maps with big yellow M's! Do not own Shaman's Plank/Pole/Spear/Lance/Rod..

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The Secret Diary Of Isaac

Day 1

Hmm. Someone should do something about large boulders high on mountain. Safety risk there.

Day 2

Too late.

3 years later

Day 1

Must stop holding rave parties on roof. Straw not very supportive of twenty odd teens.

Day 2

Went with Kraden, Jenna and Garet to Sol Sanctum. Somehow kept tripping over something that was never there when I looked again. On the other hand, Garet's axe is in his hand..

Day 3

Because of his love for shiny things, Kraden goes and ruins mystical balance of world. Good one. Also turns out Felix alive. No one tells me anything.

Day 4

Towns people seem to think because WE were with Kraden, WE must fix what HE broke. Grawr. Garet no help. But no matter. Accept mission with heroic humbility… is that a word?

Day 7

Wish Garet would stop randomly setting trees on fire. Wish he would stop randomly setting ME on fire.

Day 12

Wonder if Vault is named so because of huge bank safes?

Met scary psychic person. Said he could read minds. Hope he did not read my mind, especially the part about the chickens last summer…

Agreed to find his whimsical stick of power.

Day 13

How fulfilling it is to apprehend villains! Found those rascals who stole Ivan's Shaman pole, and got it back. Also got back the town's peoples gear. No thanks needed, it's all for the good of the world!

Day 15

Stingy Vaulters. Not even a thank you.

Day 16

Continuing on from Vault, we are off to apprehend the scoundrels who stole Ivan's master. Fear not, for help is with thee! Doust thou doubteth thine companions?!

Day 17

Garet called me a "stupid prat on a power trip" because of Ye Olde Englishee speak. Have stopped. Stupid Garet.

Day 22

Pretty sparkly woods!

Day 23

Damned paralyzing sparkles.

Day 24

Off to Imil for magical water to heal magical trees taken over by magical evil!

Day 30

Ivan still following us. Annoying little git. Funny when his cape's on fire though.

Day 34

Imil very … white. Full of sick people too. Ick. Some sickeningly happy girl shoving Panadols down their throats whilst boasting "magical Psynergy powers". Resisting urge to throttle.

Day 35

Oh look, a lighthouse. Better go have a looksee, being on mission from God and all…

Wait .. not God, Wise One.

Day 37

Biiiiig battle on lighthouse. Garet all gung-ho, got blue guy's sword in his arm. Ha ha. Course I saved the day. Oh, happy-chappy girl helped. Really is adept. Fancy that.

Day 45

Following Mia's map turned out disastrous. Not to mention no big "M" signs where they should be. Learning about martial arts at this temple though, so not total waste. "Accidently" elbowed Garet in the face when he made snide comment about my sword skills.

Not like he's the great expert.

Day 51

Shortcut through desert not quite best idea I've had. Ivan stripping at every opportunity. Ick. Garet walking around with eyes shut, smacking into walls.

Day 52

Why doesn't Mia just call up some storm clouds or something? Useless girl.

Day 54

Something keeps hitting me in the dark. Must find culprit.

Day 55

Alright, who put the toads in my sleeping bag?

Day 59

Growing tired of "companions" treating me badly. Told them to lighten up or would not give them any more guidance. They just laughed.

Idiots.

Day 60

Kalay very pretty. Big castle. Ivan all upset because has to explain to "my mistress" that he somehow lost a large number of people.

Find that hard to believe, seeing as he reads minds. Surely he has tracking beacon as well?

Day 61

Colosso colosso colosso! Fun fun fun!

Day 63

Having great time destroying sea creatures whilst on a ship. Sword slashes in hull minor problem. Ah well. That's what the tour group is for.

Day 66

Oh. My. God. WHAT were Garet and Ivan DOING with that Shaman's Lance? May have nightmares for days.

Day 68

Realised have not being paying attention to Mia. Went to see her, only to be confronted with highly peeved Mia throwing knives at the door. Must be "that-time-of-the-moon-cycle" again.

Day 71

Colosso very big event! So excited! Ignoring moans of protest from comrades. This is my time to shine.

Gave them small tasks to help me out during contest. Using all your resources is hardly cheating. Right?

Day 72

Must have discussion with Garet about keeping his mind on the job and not Ivan's Shaman's Plank.

Was invited to meet ruler of Tolbi. Babi nice guy. Gave us new quest. Find lost land with magical healing power thingies. Seems to fear dieing. Suggestion that he should just die gracefully went unnoticed.

Rulers, pfft.

Day 74

My hair seems to be more uneven than I remembered.

Day 77

Am ignoring Mia's accusations that I stole her nail polish. How rude. Blue isn't my colour anyway.

Day 79

Becoming disturbed to find Ivan smothering Garet with pillow in the dark.

Day 81

Have come to notice that desert travel is very uncomfortable. Especially when members of team can't keep their clothes on.

Day 82

Something keeps whacking me in the dark, then runs off giggling. We'll just see about THAT..

Day 84

Whack monster turns out to be Ivan. Gave him good throttling.

Garet complaining about how "this quest is going on too long, and you've got us on another quest to boot, and there AREN'T any big yellow M's to be seen, and Ivan won't give me any privavy, and blah blah blah I'm a stupid idiot who won't stop complaining to fabulous leader who I'd be lost without." I told him that he had to be steadfast in his duty. Our quest is a serious matter, and we can't afford to ever be distracted from it.

Day 85

OH MY GOD LOOK AT THE CUTE LITTLE BUNNIES!

Day 90

Found the Venus Lighthouse. Am looking for some of those little bunnies, as they hopped away rather fast. Did not tell team, as they would question my leadership authority. Told them to look for secret doors and moving statues, whilst on own quest for cute ickle bunnies.

Day 92

Thwapped Garet when he tried to sneak off during an important battle. Subsequently got a fire wave to the face. So touchy.

Day 95

Oooer. Sore head. Those evil guys and Felix and some other weird kid were at top of lighthouse. Got all hissy because we happened to beat them. Accidently got suckered into giving Shaman's Oar away. Ivan not happy. In fact, Ivan crying hysterically as we speak. Garet being a stick-in-the-mud and not comforting him.

Oh yeah. Won battle. Go us!

Day 96

Seeing as Felix and freaky-Jupiter-adept-girl-person went lighthouse-diving, we decided to check the surrounding countryside for Jenna and … that guy. The one who also got kidnapped. Whats his name .. Kraken.

Day 105

No luck. STILL no big M signs. Beginning to think Mia's map a fake.

Day 107

Have come into possession of mighty big-assed ship. Joy! Always wanted to go sailing across the sea. Companions not so happy. Screw them. I'm the leader, they do what I tell them to. Least Ivan happy, Garet duped him with fake Shaman Branch.

Day 108

And we're off! Hyperhyperhyperhyper… Mia seasick, Ivan snuggling stick, Garet shooting seagulls with fireballs. All's well. On the hunt for big yellow M's! (Oh.. and those two people we're missing…)