Because I've gotten lots of good reviews (thank you so much everyone, it's really sweet:)... ) I'll try and continue this even though I've lost my sheet with ideas on, :( Damn my fish like memory!! ...hence how the chapters get more random... Tell me more about which characters you like and stuff- I put Rose and Meryl in:) And pleaseeee review:)

And yes I am that freak girl, I thought I'd write myself as I am... Why do you laugh? Anyway, that boy could be my brother, in fact, I've just decided now he is... And the horny dog is my dog, events to do with her are based on real life, yes be worried, my family's worse than the one on Malcolm in the Middle...

Oh yes and a last thing, I have a cruddy little picture I did for this, I mean really cruddy, but if you want to see it I'll point you in the right direction.

Rated pg-13 for spoilers on Father Christmas... and a very sick dog...

*Raiden notices Rose and Snake have made their way back in.*

Raiden: Rose what were you doing?

Rose: You want to know the truth? Well in a place like this I didn't want to be on my own, and I really needed the loo, and Snake came with me, I asked him to wait outside. I ended up waiting outside the men's for him! Boy he took a long time in there...

Raiden: You couldn't figure out how to use the taps either Snake?

Snake: Damn I'm not that stupid! I was really... err, yeah, I mean that's right. Really hard to figure out.

Raiden: I mean I kept on waiting for the water to come out - but then I realised you have to actually twist the handle. I can't believe it! Here in England they actually expect you to do those things yourself, you know you have to actually flush the toilet!? For shame...

Snake: Get over it...

Graham: So... lets see what everyone else brought in... Oh! Over here we have... err two jelly things, what the hell?

Meryl: *Looks down at the ground* They go in there... *Points to pants* I think they call them butt pads...

Snake: *Raps* I like big butts and I can not lie. You other brothers can't deny. That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face You get sprung. Deep in the jeans she's wearing I'm hooked and I can't stop staring. Oh, baby I wanna get with ya And take your picture, Baby got ... *stops mid-sentence* Butt pads!!!?!!!

Meryl: Oh, well look at you Mr-I was coming on to you and you didn't do a thing about it, which side do you bat for?

Graham: I'm hoping my side... Just lose the Bono mullet...

Raiden: Hey break it up you two! I've got an important question... Everyone keeps on talking about it and I don't get it...

Snake: *Impatiently* What!

Raiden: What's sex...

Otacon: I knew this day would come, I kind of liked telling him those two lions were just cuddling, kind of funny. *Otacon whispers to Raiden...* ...and then...

Raiden: *Screams* No make it stop! Everything I ever believed in. *Screams desperately* What about the stalk, just tell me WHAT ABOUT THE STALK!!! *Starts crying* I suppose Father Christmas isn't real!

*Meryl, Rose and Otacon look at him sadly...*

Raiden: NOoooooooo, it's not true!!!

Snake: Yeah, what the hell are you talking about! He's real, I saw him!

Otacon: After you had that cigarette I gave you?

Snake: .............

Graham: Now what's this? A microwave?

Raiden: Yeah it's mine *Smiles proudly* you cook things in it.

Freak girl: Yeah!!! Go food! So good when you can't be bothered to chew... Mmm micro waved Mars Bars and Chewits, mixed together...

*Everyone moves away...*

Me: I'm a special girl...

Snake: Damn right...

Graham: Ok... moving on again... Aww what's this? A Care bear?

Snake: Yeah! Grumpy bear! Care bears stare!!! If only I had that power...

Liquid: And you're worried about her?!

Snake: But he's cool, and like me, grumpy, even when the suns shining, but never loses his charm. He rocks!!

Liquid: Now everyone, it's time to laugh and point!

Snake: *Hugs Care bear* Don't you worry baby, those nasty people need to SHUT UP!

Meryl: And I thought he had problems before...

Graham: *Hold's up a Village People costume- the policeman's one* And this, I like this, very cute, ha ha ha, who's is this?

Liquid: That's mine...

Graham: You wore it?!

Liquid: God no! *Winks at Raiden...*

Raiden: Oh... that's my policeman's uniform, Liquid told me when I wear it I look very authoritative, and it's about time I got some respect around here! He even let me handle some handcuffs, you won't even let me in your helicopter Snake!

Liquid: *Under his breath* Shut up...

Snake: *Shamefully* I'm related to him...

Otacon: And Raiden you know why we never let you take any responsibility, since you almost died on the helicopter...

Raiden: But the ceiling fan was making me cold!

Snake: *Sighs* You dumbass...

Raiden: Where am I...?

Graham: *As he stares at the massive German Shepherd growling in front of him, mouth frothing* So... ooh, this one's moving! *Unconvincingly* Isn't it adorable?

Me: *Proudly* It's mine...

Graham: I think it is the right name for it...

*The dog terrorises a few audience members and eats some of the smaller ones, then gets those urges some disturbed dogs do, it looks at Otacon, Snake and Liquid*

Horny dog: *Thinks "No pillows or trees or walls or... what the heck! He'll do, not like I'm fussy...*

Me: *Notices her dog's look* (A/N Sammy is the horny dog, she is ALWAYS horny, nothing is safe, nothing is sacred, most of all NEVER bend over anywhere near her!) Noo Sammy! Bad dog! *Pleading* Sammy come here, I have food... Oh, did I say it was for you Sammy? Err Snake just don't bend over...

*Sammy lunges at Snake...*

Snake: NNNNOOOOOOooooooooo! *Thinks "Is this how my life ends? Humped to death!?"*

Sammy: *But I want to show him the time of his life! Actually no, I just want to hump his leg*

*Snake's leg is now being pummelled*

Raiden: *Remembers Otacon's talk, and starts rocking back and forth* The stalk, the stalk's good, it's believable, the stalk, yes the stalk...

Snake: Nooo!!!

Sammy: *Oh yes, you're my bitch, say my name!*

Otacon: I'll save you! *Thinks fast and throws Raiden's brown wig over the wall*

Raiden: Nooooooo! My wig!!! I feel like I've just lost a part of me!

Sammy: *Nothing deserves to live, but especially not cats! DIEEEEEEEE!* *She then throws herself at the wig, and tries to get over the wall, she leaps with great energy, but splats on the wall and slides down, 10 minutes and 200 attempts later she decides she will spend the next hour clawing away at the wall.*

Graham: Again, I say: okayyyyy..... Actually though, that dog's actions lead us pretty well into who's our next guest... Tom Green!

*Tom Green throws himself down Graham's stairs and humps the rail...*