The Decision

            It only took me a moment to realize that my heart had jumped up into my throat when he released my hand. I tried to utter a grateful 'thank you', but the engorged lump in my throat wouldn't let my voice sound through. Instead I watched Professor Snape place my hand back down on the counter and step back a little ways.

He was still right there behind me. I could still feel his warm breath blowing softly against the back of my neck. "You'd better start breathing soon," he whispered callously into my ear. "Who knows what I might be tempted to do to you should you pass out in my arms… again," he added a moment later. His voice turned to ice and penetrated right through to my bones. Then I could feel my entire body tingle as a cold shiver spurt down my spine.

Oh Merlin! That wasn't just a shiver. That was his hand!

My eyes fluttered open and closed as I retraced the feeling of his strong fingers pressing down the middle of my back and then lifting off just above my coccyx. "What did you do the last time?" I found myself asking him.

There was no question about it. He had me under his spell. Even I could hear the terror rattling around in my voice box like a lab rat in a cage. Professor Snape had asked me to help him with some extremely rare potions, but I was beginning to wonder if he intended for me to feel just like a little white mouse awaiting some sort of mad experimentation.

"The last time," he began, "you'd taken enough Eau Noir to bring you to the edge of death." He stepped around me and leaned himself up against the counter and crossed his arms in front of him. I could see his chest rise as he drew in a deep breath and slowly let it exhale as his eyebrows arched in anger and his black eyes stared fiercely down into mine.

I squeezed my hands around the seat of my chair and held on tight as his eyes glared down at me in a bitter scowl. My entire body seemed to flood with spells of heat, and then just a quickly, turned cold again. I felt almost nauseous and was sure I'd be sick if I made any attempt to move.

"You'd put me in an awkward position, Ms Sullivan," he continued, speaking in a very low, but very clear whisper. "Being a professor, I had no choice but to rush you back to the castle to administer the proper antidote. You're very lucky we'd had so many on hand. I'd not have had enough time to prepare another one."

"Perhaps I wasn't as lucky as you think," I told him.

For a short moment his eyes seemed to soften a touch. He narrowed his eyelids and looked curiously at me. "Would you have preferred to die out there had I not come along?" He sounded just as disdainful as the look on his face. "Were you really that unhappy?" Suddenly I felt like I was right back where I was ten years ago, feeling childish and under his authority. Well, I wasn't going to stand for that. I'm an adult now and as much as he may think he does – he's got no power over me.

"You had no right to interfere," I assured him in a tone of voice as malevolent as his own. Refusing to be intimidated any longer, I glared up at him and ease my grip around the chair.

Professor Snape must have seen the challenge in my eyes. "You're still just as unhappy, aren't you?" He seemed to let down his guard and regard me as I intended to be regarded. "In the last ten years have you not found an alternate route of escape?" Keeping his arms held firmly across his chest, his empty black eyes boring into me suspiciously.

"I – I don't know what you mean, Professor."

Professor Snape slowly began shaking his head at my ignorance. He released his arms and tucked his hands round the edge of the counter on either side of him. "On that night, I believe you said to me 'This is the only way I'll ever escape you.'"

He slowly pushed himself away from the counter and began to circle around behind me. I didn't dare turn my head back to look at him. I sat still, my hands still clamped firmly to the seat and my heart pounding fiercely within my chest.

A moment later his heavy, black cloak dipped down around either side of me and I could feel him softly breathing against the nape of my neck again. If he'd have been looking, I'm sure he would have seen the goosebumps poking upward all along my neck. "For the life of me, I'll never understand what it is I did that made you want to feel my touch." His soft, warm fingers began to graze gently across my neck, trailing the path of goosebumps his breath had erected a moment ago. "I'm hardly what the female race would call pleasing, attractive, or even sexually appealing."

His silky whispers were brushing so closely against my ear I could feel the warmth of his lips touch my earlobe. My entire body shivered and shook against his words.

"I was never kind to you. I never gave you the satisfaction of hearing me congratulate you for your outstanding work even though you excelled marvellously in my class. I had no doubts that you would do exceptionally well once you left Hogwarts, and so you have."

His fingers ran continuously back and forth along the collar of my shirt and then, to my utter shock, he stood directly behind me and began soothingly pressing his fingers into my shoulders, massaging the ferocious tension away.

"So tell me Ms. Sullivan," he began as he continued to massage my aching shoulders. "How long did it take you to realize how foolish it was of you to try and throw your life away in order to settle those silly little feelings you had for me?"

I let my eyes flutter closed as his hands came down in front of me and began to rub along my collarbone. "I don't believe they were as silly as you make it sound, Professor," I murmured. "I remember feeling quite certain that my regards for you were serious. I thought I – I… loved… you."

Professor Snape pressed his hands against my breastbone and pulled me closer to him. I could feel my back pressed right up against the front of him, the buttons of his suit pressing into me. "Do you still feel that way, Ms. Sullivan?" he asked me in what sounded more like a threat than a question.

I began shaking my head. Some of my hair had gotten caught in his multiple buttons. "No," I assured, although I'm sure my shallow whisper didn't sound as reassuring as I'd meant it to sound.

"Good," I heard him say just before he bent down to press his lips to my right ear again. "There are two types of witches I will not tolerate to have in my bed," he told me just before he pressed his hands down my bare arms.

I swallowed hard and listened to the shattered rhythm of my own breathing as his right hand slithered across my bosom and reached up to tip the tiny strap of my tank top over my shoulder. "One – as you very well know – is a foolish, self-indulgent student."

His left hand came up from my shoulder and combed my hair up, exposing the flesh of my neck and shoulder. Professor Snape moved his lips to where he'd exposed my skin and fervently began to graze his tongue along the nape of my neck and then over to my shoulder leaving a fresh trail of saliva behind. He lifted his head away from my shoulder and blew softly against the cold, wet moisture coating my skin.

I closed my eyes as my entire body shuttered at the intense feeling and – much to my disapproval - a supple moan escaped my lips. I could hear Professor Snape chuckling softly behind me as my body surrendered to his undesired, yet completely entrancing caressing.

"The second," he went on, still ardently nibbling down along my neck and shoulder, "is the lovesick, obsessive witch you – thankfully - did not become."

He squeezed his arms around me for a brief moment. I could feel him dragging his chin across my head from one side to the other. Once he had his lips pursed against my right ear again I could hear a low, eager rumble coming from his throat. A moment later his mouth opened and a soft, purr-like growl emitted from the back of his throat.

Professor Snape began to rock my body from side to side along with his. His hands slithered from around my shoulders to across my breasts again. He cupped his palm around me and squeezed tenderly.

I closed my eyes and exhaled deeply when his hand enclosed my breast. "Why are you doing this?" I managed to whisper.

"Because Elizabeth," he lulled into my ear, "it's what you've always wanted," he answered. "You're no longer my student. You've become a woman, Elizabeth." His hand was still grasped firmly around my breast as he continued to murmur into my ear. He moved his fingers around in gentle circles and brought his thumb down to rub against the material of my shirt where the stimulation was most prominent. "If it is still your wish to feel my hands upon your body – you're perfectly delightful and extremely desirable body – speak now. Or, if you ask me to stop, I'll do so and you'll never have to see me again. Make up your mind. Now."