Flirting with danger...
Disclaimer: I don't own the Hp characters, someone much older and better at writing does. I wont make any money off this pitiful writing, don't worry!
A/N: Ok, a few announcements. First of all, for those of you who are reading my other story, (Just 1 Little Change...) which I have to say isn't many, be rest-assured that I will be continuing that story, I just had this great idea for a plot and had to write it down and see if it really works.
Spoilers: All books
Time: Summer of 6th year (summer after 5th year)
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Harry Potter dipped his quill gingerly into the bottle of ink, careful not to spill on his bedspread and started scribbling his potions essay. The scratching quill sounded loud compared to the almost eerie silence that was enveloping the Dursleys place. The Dursleys were all, hopefully, asleep, considering it was 11:02. Dudley was thankfully over at his friend, Vincent's house, otherwise the whole house would be echoing with his enormously loud snores. Harry Potter was sometimes in bed right now, but he had put off his potions homework for too long, and had finally decided that he had to do it.
'Not that I need to try anyway.' Harry thought angrily. 'No matter what I write, Snape will give me an F.'
He sighed and reluctantly continued his writing, occasionally pausing to shove his glasses further up his nose. Harry's glasses were no longer the round, black ones he used to have. Ginny, whom he had become rather good friends with last year, had finally convinced him that he should buy new ones, ones that didn't make him look, as Ginny so kindly put it, " Like one of those tree frogs on that magazine, National Geographic, that dad's oh-so-fond of."
While Harry tended to argue about the tree-frog comparison, he did have to admit, his new glasses made him look much more attractive. The new ones were small and, instead of hiding his eyes, they drew attention to them. And that was a good thing, or so almost every girl at Hogwarts had told him. He had soon gotten tired of "God Harry, your eyes are so big!" or "Your eyes sparkle in the cutest way Harry, almost like a diamond." In fact, Harry finally had to convince Ginny to tell The young Harry Potter fan club that if they didn't stop commenting on his eyes he would get his old glasses back. Thankfully this shut most of the younger ones up.
Harry looked up from his homework, startled by a noise by the window. Hedgwig was sitting on the window ledge, a big parcel attached to her leg, and rapping sharply on the window.
Harry rushed over to the window and pulled it open quickly.
"Hedgwig! Quiet, you don't want the Dursleys to lock you in your cage do you?"
Hedgwig gave him an indignant stare and swiftly flew to her perch, cuffing Harry on the head with an outstretched wing.
"Ok Hedgwig, you win. Thanks for bringing 'Mione's present."
Hedgwig hooted grumpily, but flew back down and accepted the small piece of bread Harry held out to her.
Hermione's gift this year was unusually heavy, to heavy to be the usual book. Harry looked at it, perplexed, but put it aside, determined not to break his tradition. Every year he opened his presents at 12:00 on the dot. And it was only 11:35 right now.
Harry sat back down, finished his potions essay on the Truth Potion, and lay down on his bed to wait till 12.
His mind wandered to past birthdays. Bitter-sweet memories flooded his brain. He remembered how uneventful his birthdays were until he went to Hogwarts. He had never gotten a single present from anyone then, and when he was very young, he would often cry himself to sleep in his little cupboard, hugging his stuffed elephant, a hand-me-down from Dudley, who had torn one ear off and ate one of the button eyes.
Then, when he was 11 he had gotten his first birthday cake, as well as the best birthday present he had ever gotten. The acceptance letter to Hogwarts.
After that his birthdays had always been happy occasions, the one time in the summer that he got to hear from Ron and Hermione.
Except for last year. Harry shuttered, remembering last summer. That had been the lowest point in his life so far. That had been the night he had almost killed himself.
::flashback::
Harry lay in bed, staring vacantly at the ceiling. He groaned and looked at the clock next to him. 12:12. And there was nothing. He had absolutely no presents. That proved it, there was absolutely nobody who really and truly cared about him.
Hermione and Ron were nice, but they had obviously forgotten about him, after all they had each other now. Hermione had sent him a note 2 weeks into the summer saying that Ron had asked her out. And she said yes. Although Harry had nothing against them being together, this proved it. He was the 3rd wheel. Nobody, absolutely no one, really cared for him. The Dursleys probably wanted him dead, Sirus was too busy running and tracking Wormtail for him, and Hermione and Ron had each other. And the rest of the wizarding world didn't truly give a damn about him. They simply cared about the boy-who-lived. They thought he was a hero, which was a total lie. His mother was a hero, true. She had given her life for him, but Harry had done nothing that counted as a hero. He had simply been a typical Gryffindor and attack anything in his way. And he had managed to survive by pure, dumb luck. And for this he was considered a hero.
'Some hero I am.' Harry thought sarcastically. All I have ever done was someone else's work. In 1st year, Hermione and Ron did most of the work breaking the teachers traps. All he had done was use his Quidditch skills to catch a dumb flying key. And yet he had been considered a hero. For killing a man. Burning him until Voldemort left him to die.
Then in his second year All Harry did was stab blindly at a snake. He hadn't meant to hit it in the mouth, he didn't mean to call the sorting hat, sword and bird. He should have been killed then also. Dumb luck. Then in third year he almost killed his godfather, for something he didn't do. And then it wasn't his idea they used to help Sirus escape.
But last year was the worst. The stupid luck he had always had almost failed him. He had killed Cedric. It was all his fault. Then on top of it he had helped Voldemort return to power. No, nothing Harry Potter had done was him. He was no hero, his friends and family were. He was simply a tool the public used to aim all the glory on. He was a thing they liked. Not a real person. He wasn't a real person to anyone. None of them really cared. Ron and Hermione had, but they had always liked each other better than him and now they had what they really wanted. They had no use for him anymore.
Nobody really and truly cared about him in this horrible, empty world. He was nothing, simply a person used by newspapers to write a story. He was a simple character for the press to use. Nothing more.
Harry turned over on his pillow, burying his head in the soft down. But it held no comfort. Nothing did. He was alone, helpless. And nobody cared. Hot tears leaked out of his emerald eyes, sinking slowly into the pillow. 'nobody cares that I'm crying. Nobody cares if I die.' Harry lay there, his thin body shaking with silent sobs. Even if they weren't silent, nobody would care that he was crying. Who cared how Harry Potter really felt?
'That's it.' Harry thought. 'I cant go on any longer. There is nothing to live for. Nobody loves or cares about me. My life is empty, simply a pawn piece for the media. I am nobody except the boy-who-lived. Well I wont live anymore. I have nowhere else to turn to. Nobody to cry out to. I'm nothing.'
Harry took a couple more shuddering breaths and picked up his pocketknife, the one Sirus gave him last summer. Slowly Harry opened the knife, pulling out the blade and holding it up to the moonlight. Grim fascination came over him. The silver knife glittered ominously. 'Just like a movie.' Harry thought. 'Right before someone kills another person. Except this time, that someone is me and I'm killing myself, not someone else. Its glistening for me.' Harry took one last shuttering breath and slowly laid the deadly tool against his wrist. The metal was icy cold, almost numbing his wrist. Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Slowly he pressed the knife down.
Harry felt suddenly as if he was hovering outside himself, watching someone else slit his wrists, not himself. Grim fascination filled Harry. The knife increased its pressure slowly, his skin barely withholding the pressure. Suddenly there was a sharp rap at the window. Harry's dream-like state vanished and he pulled the knife away sharply, making a small cut on the very side of his wrist.
He collapsed onto his bed, sobbing. Finally he remembered the tapping he heard on the window. He sat up slowly looked towards the window. There, looking at him very impatiently was Hedgwig, along with many other owls, all holding packages around their legs. Tears ran down Harry's face again. His friends didn't forget him, or his birthday. They were simply delayed. Harry rushed towards the window and let in the birds who had obviously just saved his life.
He had to get out of this depression, he didn't want to die. Hedgwig flew over to Harry and nipped him rather hard on the finger, clearly telling him to let her in earlier next time. Harry smiled shakily and took the package off Hedgwig's foot. It was from Hermione. He picked up the note and opened the envelope slowly. Taking another shaky breath Harry slowly unfolded the letter and started reading.
Dear Harry,
I hope your having a great summer. Mine has been fine, nothing excellent. In case you were wondering, yes me and Ron are still going out, but don't worry Harry, we wont exclude you. Ha, like you would let yourself be excluded! Have you heard from Snuffles lately? If you haven't then I guess that's a good thing. It means he's not in any danger at least. I'm sure that Hagrid is sending you some rock cakes for your birthday, please don't try to eat one. I would hate it if you died from food poisoning. Who would keep Ron from totally blowing off his homework with me?! Heehee.
I went to the Weasley's house for a couple weeks this summer. Mrs. Weasley wouldn't stop watching me and Ron together, I think she was terrified that we would do something "naughty" or something. It was hilarious. Finally, when me and Ron were sitting on the couch together, doing or homework, or should I say, I was doing my homework, Mrs. Weasley walked in, acting like she was simply looking for something. This obviously didn't fool us. Ron got so mad that he looked at me and kissed me hard on the lips. It was soooo funny! Mrs. Weasley turned as redder than Ron can and all but ran out of the room. Anyway, I'm babbling so I'll let you go open your present now. Don't forget to do your homework Harry! I'll see you in about a month at Hogwarts, ok?! BYE!
From,
Hermione Granger
Harry smiled a little and wiped a tear out of his eye. He was being so stupid. How could he ever even dream that Hermione or Ron didn't care about him? He seriously needed help. If he got into another one of those depression funks he would probably end up killing himself for real. After all he had been about to before. Thank god for the owls. Harry smiled again and picket up Hermione's present. Slowly he tore off the brown paper and smiled. Hermione had gotten him a book, no surprise there. But this was a truly useful book. Written across the cover, in colors changing from gold to red was the words, Potions for Dummies: The Fool-proof guide to the art of Potions. Harry smiled at Hermione's tactics and opened the book. Wow, this would help him a lot! The book, like many magic books, was much larger then it looked. Under the Table of Contents there were the names of more than 100 potions. Although the book looked only about 100 pages, there was at least 3 pages on each potion. Harry smiled and traveled down the list. There, lets see truth Potions. He lightly touched the words Truth Potion and watched as the book turned to pages 1-5. Amazing. Just a second ago, these pages had The Love Potion on them. Harry skimmed through the pages. 'Wow.' Thought Harry. 'This is amazing! There is so much information here, I could write a much longer paper in less time! Even Snape couldn't fail me then. Dumbledore would surely stop him.' Harry smiled again, lifted momentarily out of his depressed state. He loved his birthday!
Now for Ron's present. Ron's note was short and hurried but Harry realized that everything Ron wrote was short and hurried. He picked up the package Ron gave him and quickly opened it. Inside was the most amazing present Harry had ever gotten, well not counting his Hogwarts letter. There was a small box, about half the size of Hermione's book, but when he opened it he saw that it was clearly magical. Inside was a guide-book all about different plays for a Quidditch team. There were many plays that looked, although Harry wasn't an expert, better than some Wood had used. The pictures were moving in step-by-step actions, showing exactly what you should do, so precisely Harry was sure even Hermione could do them. Next to the play book was a smaller book with the golden snitch speeding quickly across the cover. Harry smiled and opened it. There were more pictures, this time showing exactly how to do some more complicated moves for a seeker. They were brilliant and Harry could hardly wait to try some of them out! Next to the two books was a small package of sweets and toys, all labeled Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Harry smiled and opened a small note, obviously from Fred and George.
Hey Harry!
We just wanted to thank you for all the money, even though we still think your mental! We got Ron new dress robes just like you asked, he was incredibly surprised, and very suspicious at first. I think he thought we had hexed them to dance or something. Actually we were thinking about it but since they were from you, we were nice. Oh and you know what else, our new shop is doing great! We have a small shop right now but we have made so much money we are going to buy a bigger one in Hogsmeade, hopefully beat Zonko's, maybe even buy them out! By 6th year I'm sure that we will have a store there so we can see you anytime! Thanks again for the money, you mental idiot!
Sincerely,
Gred and Forge.
Harry laughed quietly to himself and opened his other present. It was from Hagrid, and had a great assortment of candy, as well as his famous rock-cakes. Harry took Hermione's advice and carefully avoided them. Suddenly Harry noticed a small bird sitting in the corner of the room, obviously a little nervous of all the other owls. Harry walked quietly over to it and gently took a letter off its little foot. It was brown and very young-looking, it even had some down left on its sleek feathers. Harry handed it a small piece of cake, Hagrid had sent him a piece, and stroked its young feathers. Eagerly Harry opened the note from the mystery person. He smiled joyfully. He was right, it was from Sirus.
Dear Harry,
I hope you have had a great summer! I am fine, nobody has had one suspicion about "snuffles" yet. I have been taking newspapers from the garbage and am happy to tell you that I am very rarely in the paper anymore, and there has only been one minor attack of Death Eaters and nobody was hurt. If you ever want any news from me, or have anything on your mind, feel absolutely free to send your owl to me. Hedgwig is certainly smart enough to find me! Hopefully this little owl I sent found you ok, its her first time on the job, in fact I found her fallen from a nest and nursed her back to health. I haven't decided on a name yet, maybe you could help me? Well anyway, Happy Birthday Harry! Feel free to write to me anytime.
Love,
Snuffles
Harry smiled and scribbled a quick note back to Sirus, telling him that he was having a hard summer but would be fine, don't worry. Then he gently attached the small note to Sirus' little bird and gave it another piece of cake. "If you want to wait here tonight to rest, that's fine, ok?" He told the bird, smiling as it tucked its fluffy head under its wing.
Harry sighed and picked up a piece of parchment and his quill. He knew what he had to do, Dumbledore must be told of his depressed state before he hurt himself again. Harry sat down at his desk and slowly, painstakingly started to write.
Dear Dumbledore,
I know it must be weird, me writing to you, but you said that I could if I ever had something to tell you. Well I do. My summer hasn't exactly gone to well with me. The Dursleys, though not physically abusing me, have locked me in my room with my schoolwork downstairs. They make me do everything and although this happens every year, I'm afraid I cant take it anymore Dumbledore, not this year. I know that you think I'm safe from everyone here, which I'm sure I am, but I am not safe from one person, and that's me. I have been feeling a little, well, down. I'm depressed and its scaring me Dumbledore. I am sorry if I sound like a whining 6 year-old, but I really cant stay here any longer. I am afraid, no sure, that I will end up, hurting myself, so to speak. I am very sorry to bother you Dumbledore but this is serious. I would appreciate it if you let me stay somewhere else, with anyone, until school starts. I'm afraid of being left alone. Well thanks for listening, I'm sorry if this note sounded whiny, I'm down to my last thread.
Sincerely,
Harry J. Potter
Harry sunk down into his bed and finally, at 1:00 in the morning, got some very well-deserved sleep.
::end Flashback::
Harry lay on his bed, exactly a year later, thinking sadly about that summer. It was awful, but thankfully, he had gotten through it. Dumbledore had let him stay the last month or so, with him at Hogwarts and had kept a fairly close watch on Harry to make sure he was doing well. Although Harry would still get depressed now and then, he was eternally grateful for Dumbledore for letting him stay at Hogwarts. By the time school had started, he was almost back to his normal self, only falling back into his old depression occasionally during the year. And then he had Ginny to help him out. She had been very good at comforting Harry, and he was very grateful for that.
Another good thing that had happened to Harry last year was Quidditch. Since Wood was gone, along with many other Gryffindor players, the remainder of the team elected Harry as the team captain. Although Harry had no idea how to make plays or anything of that sort, he had agreed, under one condition. He could have an assistant. The team, as well as Dumbledore, agreed. Harry approached Ron immediately after their first Quidditch practice and asked him if he would be his assistant. Ron was, of course, overjoyed, as was Harry.
Ron, as Harry had suspected, was perhaps an even better captain than Wood. He was, although technically second-in-command, the teams real master-mind of the plays and everyone knew it. Harry had always suspected Ron as being a good coach, after all, he was great at Chess. The Gryffindor Quidditch team was amazing! They swept the other teams away, all except Slytherin, they had beat them by only a small margin. Yes, all in all, 5th year hadn't been too bad.
Harry's thoughts were interrupted by the loud ringing of his alarm clock. Harry's hand quickly shot out to turn it off. For a long moment he sat there, silent, making sure the Dursleys hadn't waken up. Once he was reassured that everyone was still asleep, Harry walked over to the window and opened it half-way so that the rest of the owls could come in when they got here. Then he walked over to Hermione's present and opened the note.
Dear Harry,
How are you? I hope your depression hasn't come back at all. Well if it had I'm sure you would be at Hogwarts anyway. I have been having a great summer, how about you? Ron invited me over to his house again, this time for 1 week. Luckily his mother has lightened up about us, only coming in about 2 times a day to make sure we are "behaving". Brother. I am staying in Ginny's room, their guest room was taken by Bill, who had come by unexpectedly this summer. Guess what? Ginny has a boyfriend! But sorry, I'm not allowed to tell anyone who it is. I'm not even allowed to tell Ron she has one, which makes sense, you know how protective Ron is of his little sister. Its pretty sad...
I hope you like your present, its not a book, for the second time in your life! And its not a broom kit either, sorry. Still, I think you will like it! Well anyway, Happy Birthday! I'll see you in a few weeks!
From,
Hermione Granger
Harry smiled. Gosh, Ginny has a boyfriend? I wonder who it is? Harry thought with a smile. Well at least I know for sure that she's over me. That's a relief. It was always a little awkward talking to her and not knowing for sure. Harry smiled again and opened his present.
He looked at the big box Hermione had sent him, puzzled. It was plastic, rather heavy with what looked like air holes all over it. There was also a little place on the side, labeled food. The quickly opened the top, wondering what kind of animal Hermione had sent him, hopefully it wasn't a cat! It wasn't.
Harry gasped in surprise and happiness. Hermione had sent him a snake! It was all black and medium in size. Its head was rather small and it had a single green stripe across its neck. Its eyes were blood red, looking like two sparkling emeralds. Harry smiled and spoke to it, obviously in parsletounge.
"Hello, what's your name?"
"Hello Harry. I'm Arabic. It'sss very nice to meet you. The only Parsletounge in Hisstory who isn't on the dark sside."
Harry blushed a little at the compliment and looked at the box Arabic had been living in.
"Did my friend make you comfortable in that box-thing? It looks rather stuffy."
"Oh yess. Your friend is a very good sstudent Harry. She used many sspells to make it comfortable in there. Oh and there iss a note in there from her alsso, about me I ssuspect, although I can't ssee why sshe cant just trust me to tell you."
Harry smiled and looked inside the box. Sure enough there was a note taped to the side of box. Harry opened it and started reading.
Hey Harry,
I suspect the snake told you this was in here. At least I hope he did. This snake is very poisonous but don't worry, the owner assured me wont bite until told by his owner to. Plus I really doubt if he would kill the only person on earth, besides Voldemort, that can talk to snakes.
He is a magical snake, although nobody knows what he can do. Some snakes are said to be able to tell the future, tell how magical someone is, do magic themselves, heal people, or even read minds. Of course nobody really knows if all these are true because nobody can talk to snakes. Or at least hardly anybody. Still why don't you ask your friend if its true? I talked to Dumbledore already and he assured me that it was ok for you to have a pet snake, considering you can talk to them. I hope you like the snake, I didn't know what kind of personality they all had because, obviously I cant talk to them, so I just picked out the one I thought was prettiest. Don't you love his red eyes?! Ok, well hope you liked your present! Bye!
Hermione G.
Harry looked over at Arabic and smiled.
"So your poisonous are you? Neat, just don't bite anyone unless I'm being attacked by death eaters, ok?" Arabic agreed.
"Are you really magical? Hermione said that there was a rumor you guys were, but obviously most people cant speak to you so nobody knows."
"Yess, I am a magical snake. I can sometimes tell the future and if somebody who is very in touch with their magical limits, like your friend Hermione, is nearby I can feel their magical powers. I can also heal people, but only if they are near to death and close to me. So I could probably heal you if you were almost dead."
Harry smiled. "What do you mean though, by magical limits? You mean how much magic they have?"
Arabic seemed to be thinking, then said slowly. "No, not like that. It'ss kind of like... well. Ok, its like if somebody knows just how much magic they have, if they use their magic to its extent. Like for instance, your friend Hermione. She has the average magical ability, but sshe is more, well, in tune with her magic you could ssay. She knows how much sshe has and she uses more of it, insstead of keeping it stored up insside her. Do you ssee?"
Harry thought for awhile, then nodded slowly. "Yes, I think I do. How about me, do I use most of my magic?"
Arabic looked puzzled for a second, then said slowly. "Well no, actually, you use hardly any of it. Or at least that'ss how I feel. But you feel like you usse are using almost as much as Hermione. That's sstrange. Oh well, my main sstrength is prophecy sso I may be wrong."
Harry smiled and looked at the clock. "Holy shit, its 2:00. I think I'm going to bed now. Where do you want to ssleep Arabic? I could make you a makeshift bed, or you could sleep in your box. Which do you prefer?"
Arabic looked at the box for a moment then said.
"Well the sspells Hermione used on the box are getting dimmer, since she wasn't allowed to use much power. She had to ask Dumbledore before she could perform them you see. But they are fine enough tonight. Still do you think you could make me a little place where I could ssleep tomorrow? It will be rather uncomfortable to sleep in a box without the spells."
Harry nodded his head sleepily and put Arabic into the box, then slowly got into bed, suddenly very tired. 'I'll open the rest of my presents tomorrow.' Thought Harry sleepily before he drifted off to sleep...
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A/N: Ok, so what do you guys think? Good, bad? Should I continue? And yes, this is the right story. Harry will be a powerful person, but don't worry, he wont be an all-powerful person who is much more powerful than Voldemort so he has no trouble defeating him, don't worry. He is a necromiser, and can see ghosts bla bla bla. You'll see later, if people want this story to continue. Please write me and tell me if you do! I will continue if I get more than 5 reviews, ok? Thanks so much. If I do write more it should probably be up in about 1 week or so. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!
Disclaimer: I don't own the Hp characters, someone much older and better at writing does. I wont make any money off this pitiful writing, don't worry!
A/N: Ok, a few announcements. First of all, for those of you who are reading my other story, (Just 1 Little Change...) which I have to say isn't many, be rest-assured that I will be continuing that story, I just had this great idea for a plot and had to write it down and see if it really works.
Spoilers: All books
Time: Summer of 6th year (summer after 5th year)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Harry Potter dipped his quill gingerly into the bottle of ink, careful not to spill on his bedspread and started scribbling his potions essay. The scratching quill sounded loud compared to the almost eerie silence that was enveloping the Dursleys place. The Dursleys were all, hopefully, asleep, considering it was 11:02. Dudley was thankfully over at his friend, Vincent's house, otherwise the whole house would be echoing with his enormously loud snores. Harry Potter was sometimes in bed right now, but he had put off his potions homework for too long, and had finally decided that he had to do it.
'Not that I need to try anyway.' Harry thought angrily. 'No matter what I write, Snape will give me an F.'
He sighed and reluctantly continued his writing, occasionally pausing to shove his glasses further up his nose. Harry's glasses were no longer the round, black ones he used to have. Ginny, whom he had become rather good friends with last year, had finally convinced him that he should buy new ones, ones that didn't make him look, as Ginny so kindly put it, " Like one of those tree frogs on that magazine, National Geographic, that dad's oh-so-fond of."
While Harry tended to argue about the tree-frog comparison, he did have to admit, his new glasses made him look much more attractive. The new ones were small and, instead of hiding his eyes, they drew attention to them. And that was a good thing, or so almost every girl at Hogwarts had told him. He had soon gotten tired of "God Harry, your eyes are so big!" or "Your eyes sparkle in the cutest way Harry, almost like a diamond." In fact, Harry finally had to convince Ginny to tell The young Harry Potter fan club that if they didn't stop commenting on his eyes he would get his old glasses back. Thankfully this shut most of the younger ones up.
Harry looked up from his homework, startled by a noise by the window. Hedgwig was sitting on the window ledge, a big parcel attached to her leg, and rapping sharply on the window.
Harry rushed over to the window and pulled it open quickly.
"Hedgwig! Quiet, you don't want the Dursleys to lock you in your cage do you?"
Hedgwig gave him an indignant stare and swiftly flew to her perch, cuffing Harry on the head with an outstretched wing.
"Ok Hedgwig, you win. Thanks for bringing 'Mione's present."
Hedgwig hooted grumpily, but flew back down and accepted the small piece of bread Harry held out to her.
Hermione's gift this year was unusually heavy, to heavy to be the usual book. Harry looked at it, perplexed, but put it aside, determined not to break his tradition. Every year he opened his presents at 12:00 on the dot. And it was only 11:35 right now.
Harry sat back down, finished his potions essay on the Truth Potion, and lay down on his bed to wait till 12.
His mind wandered to past birthdays. Bitter-sweet memories flooded his brain. He remembered how uneventful his birthdays were until he went to Hogwarts. He had never gotten a single present from anyone then, and when he was very young, he would often cry himself to sleep in his little cupboard, hugging his stuffed elephant, a hand-me-down from Dudley, who had torn one ear off and ate one of the button eyes.
Then, when he was 11 he had gotten his first birthday cake, as well as the best birthday present he had ever gotten. The acceptance letter to Hogwarts.
After that his birthdays had always been happy occasions, the one time in the summer that he got to hear from Ron and Hermione.
Except for last year. Harry shuttered, remembering last summer. That had been the lowest point in his life so far. That had been the night he had almost killed himself.
::flashback::
Harry lay in bed, staring vacantly at the ceiling. He groaned and looked at the clock next to him. 12:12. And there was nothing. He had absolutely no presents. That proved it, there was absolutely nobody who really and truly cared about him.
Hermione and Ron were nice, but they had obviously forgotten about him, after all they had each other now. Hermione had sent him a note 2 weeks into the summer saying that Ron had asked her out. And she said yes. Although Harry had nothing against them being together, this proved it. He was the 3rd wheel. Nobody, absolutely no one, really cared for him. The Dursleys probably wanted him dead, Sirus was too busy running and tracking Wormtail for him, and Hermione and Ron had each other. And the rest of the wizarding world didn't truly give a damn about him. They simply cared about the boy-who-lived. They thought he was a hero, which was a total lie. His mother was a hero, true. She had given her life for him, but Harry had done nothing that counted as a hero. He had simply been a typical Gryffindor and attack anything in his way. And he had managed to survive by pure, dumb luck. And for this he was considered a hero.
'Some hero I am.' Harry thought sarcastically. All I have ever done was someone else's work. In 1st year, Hermione and Ron did most of the work breaking the teachers traps. All he had done was use his Quidditch skills to catch a dumb flying key. And yet he had been considered a hero. For killing a man. Burning him until Voldemort left him to die.
Then in his second year All Harry did was stab blindly at a snake. He hadn't meant to hit it in the mouth, he didn't mean to call the sorting hat, sword and bird. He should have been killed then also. Dumb luck. Then in third year he almost killed his godfather, for something he didn't do. And then it wasn't his idea they used to help Sirus escape.
But last year was the worst. The stupid luck he had always had almost failed him. He had killed Cedric. It was all his fault. Then on top of it he had helped Voldemort return to power. No, nothing Harry Potter had done was him. He was no hero, his friends and family were. He was simply a tool the public used to aim all the glory on. He was a thing they liked. Not a real person. He wasn't a real person to anyone. None of them really cared. Ron and Hermione had, but they had always liked each other better than him and now they had what they really wanted. They had no use for him anymore.
Nobody really and truly cared about him in this horrible, empty world. He was nothing, simply a person used by newspapers to write a story. He was a simple character for the press to use. Nothing more.
Harry turned over on his pillow, burying his head in the soft down. But it held no comfort. Nothing did. He was alone, helpless. And nobody cared. Hot tears leaked out of his emerald eyes, sinking slowly into the pillow. 'nobody cares that I'm crying. Nobody cares if I die.' Harry lay there, his thin body shaking with silent sobs. Even if they weren't silent, nobody would care that he was crying. Who cared how Harry Potter really felt?
'That's it.' Harry thought. 'I cant go on any longer. There is nothing to live for. Nobody loves or cares about me. My life is empty, simply a pawn piece for the media. I am nobody except the boy-who-lived. Well I wont live anymore. I have nowhere else to turn to. Nobody to cry out to. I'm nothing.'
Harry took a couple more shuddering breaths and picked up his pocketknife, the one Sirus gave him last summer. Slowly Harry opened the knife, pulling out the blade and holding it up to the moonlight. Grim fascination came over him. The silver knife glittered ominously. 'Just like a movie.' Harry thought. 'Right before someone kills another person. Except this time, that someone is me and I'm killing myself, not someone else. Its glistening for me.' Harry took one last shuttering breath and slowly laid the deadly tool against his wrist. The metal was icy cold, almost numbing his wrist. Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Slowly he pressed the knife down.
Harry felt suddenly as if he was hovering outside himself, watching someone else slit his wrists, not himself. Grim fascination filled Harry. The knife increased its pressure slowly, his skin barely withholding the pressure. Suddenly there was a sharp rap at the window. Harry's dream-like state vanished and he pulled the knife away sharply, making a small cut on the very side of his wrist.
He collapsed onto his bed, sobbing. Finally he remembered the tapping he heard on the window. He sat up slowly looked towards the window. There, looking at him very impatiently was Hedgwig, along with many other owls, all holding packages around their legs. Tears ran down Harry's face again. His friends didn't forget him, or his birthday. They were simply delayed. Harry rushed towards the window and let in the birds who had obviously just saved his life.
He had to get out of this depression, he didn't want to die. Hedgwig flew over to Harry and nipped him rather hard on the finger, clearly telling him to let her in earlier next time. Harry smiled shakily and took the package off Hedgwig's foot. It was from Hermione. He picked up the note and opened the envelope slowly. Taking another shaky breath Harry slowly unfolded the letter and started reading.
Dear Harry,
I hope your having a great summer. Mine has been fine, nothing excellent. In case you were wondering, yes me and Ron are still going out, but don't worry Harry, we wont exclude you. Ha, like you would let yourself be excluded! Have you heard from Snuffles lately? If you haven't then I guess that's a good thing. It means he's not in any danger at least. I'm sure that Hagrid is sending you some rock cakes for your birthday, please don't try to eat one. I would hate it if you died from food poisoning. Who would keep Ron from totally blowing off his homework with me?! Heehee.
I went to the Weasley's house for a couple weeks this summer. Mrs. Weasley wouldn't stop watching me and Ron together, I think she was terrified that we would do something "naughty" or something. It was hilarious. Finally, when me and Ron were sitting on the couch together, doing or homework, or should I say, I was doing my homework, Mrs. Weasley walked in, acting like she was simply looking for something. This obviously didn't fool us. Ron got so mad that he looked at me and kissed me hard on the lips. It was soooo funny! Mrs. Weasley turned as redder than Ron can and all but ran out of the room. Anyway, I'm babbling so I'll let you go open your present now. Don't forget to do your homework Harry! I'll see you in about a month at Hogwarts, ok?! BYE!
From,
Hermione Granger
Harry smiled a little and wiped a tear out of his eye. He was being so stupid. How could he ever even dream that Hermione or Ron didn't care about him? He seriously needed help. If he got into another one of those depression funks he would probably end up killing himself for real. After all he had been about to before. Thank god for the owls. Harry smiled again and picket up Hermione's present. Slowly he tore off the brown paper and smiled. Hermione had gotten him a book, no surprise there. But this was a truly useful book. Written across the cover, in colors changing from gold to red was the words, Potions for Dummies: The Fool-proof guide to the art of Potions. Harry smiled at Hermione's tactics and opened the book. Wow, this would help him a lot! The book, like many magic books, was much larger then it looked. Under the Table of Contents there were the names of more than 100 potions. Although the book looked only about 100 pages, there was at least 3 pages on each potion. Harry smiled and traveled down the list. There, lets see truth Potions. He lightly touched the words Truth Potion and watched as the book turned to pages 1-5. Amazing. Just a second ago, these pages had The Love Potion on them. Harry skimmed through the pages. 'Wow.' Thought Harry. 'This is amazing! There is so much information here, I could write a much longer paper in less time! Even Snape couldn't fail me then. Dumbledore would surely stop him.' Harry smiled again, lifted momentarily out of his depressed state. He loved his birthday!
Now for Ron's present. Ron's note was short and hurried but Harry realized that everything Ron wrote was short and hurried. He picked up the package Ron gave him and quickly opened it. Inside was the most amazing present Harry had ever gotten, well not counting his Hogwarts letter. There was a small box, about half the size of Hermione's book, but when he opened it he saw that it was clearly magical. Inside was a guide-book all about different plays for a Quidditch team. There were many plays that looked, although Harry wasn't an expert, better than some Wood had used. The pictures were moving in step-by-step actions, showing exactly what you should do, so precisely Harry was sure even Hermione could do them. Next to the play book was a smaller book with the golden snitch speeding quickly across the cover. Harry smiled and opened it. There were more pictures, this time showing exactly how to do some more complicated moves for a seeker. They were brilliant and Harry could hardly wait to try some of them out! Next to the two books was a small package of sweets and toys, all labeled Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Harry smiled and opened a small note, obviously from Fred and George.
Hey Harry!
We just wanted to thank you for all the money, even though we still think your mental! We got Ron new dress robes just like you asked, he was incredibly surprised, and very suspicious at first. I think he thought we had hexed them to dance or something. Actually we were thinking about it but since they were from you, we were nice. Oh and you know what else, our new shop is doing great! We have a small shop right now but we have made so much money we are going to buy a bigger one in Hogsmeade, hopefully beat Zonko's, maybe even buy them out! By 6th year I'm sure that we will have a store there so we can see you anytime! Thanks again for the money, you mental idiot!
Sincerely,
Gred and Forge.
Harry laughed quietly to himself and opened his other present. It was from Hagrid, and had a great assortment of candy, as well as his famous rock-cakes. Harry took Hermione's advice and carefully avoided them. Suddenly Harry noticed a small bird sitting in the corner of the room, obviously a little nervous of all the other owls. Harry walked quietly over to it and gently took a letter off its little foot. It was brown and very young-looking, it even had some down left on its sleek feathers. Harry handed it a small piece of cake, Hagrid had sent him a piece, and stroked its young feathers. Eagerly Harry opened the note from the mystery person. He smiled joyfully. He was right, it was from Sirus.
Dear Harry,
I hope you have had a great summer! I am fine, nobody has had one suspicion about "snuffles" yet. I have been taking newspapers from the garbage and am happy to tell you that I am very rarely in the paper anymore, and there has only been one minor attack of Death Eaters and nobody was hurt. If you ever want any news from me, or have anything on your mind, feel absolutely free to send your owl to me. Hedgwig is certainly smart enough to find me! Hopefully this little owl I sent found you ok, its her first time on the job, in fact I found her fallen from a nest and nursed her back to health. I haven't decided on a name yet, maybe you could help me? Well anyway, Happy Birthday Harry! Feel free to write to me anytime.
Love,
Snuffles
Harry smiled and scribbled a quick note back to Sirus, telling him that he was having a hard summer but would be fine, don't worry. Then he gently attached the small note to Sirus' little bird and gave it another piece of cake. "If you want to wait here tonight to rest, that's fine, ok?" He told the bird, smiling as it tucked its fluffy head under its wing.
Harry sighed and picked up a piece of parchment and his quill. He knew what he had to do, Dumbledore must be told of his depressed state before he hurt himself again. Harry sat down at his desk and slowly, painstakingly started to write.
Dear Dumbledore,
I know it must be weird, me writing to you, but you said that I could if I ever had something to tell you. Well I do. My summer hasn't exactly gone to well with me. The Dursleys, though not physically abusing me, have locked me in my room with my schoolwork downstairs. They make me do everything and although this happens every year, I'm afraid I cant take it anymore Dumbledore, not this year. I know that you think I'm safe from everyone here, which I'm sure I am, but I am not safe from one person, and that's me. I have been feeling a little, well, down. I'm depressed and its scaring me Dumbledore. I am sorry if I sound like a whining 6 year-old, but I really cant stay here any longer. I am afraid, no sure, that I will end up, hurting myself, so to speak. I am very sorry to bother you Dumbledore but this is serious. I would appreciate it if you let me stay somewhere else, with anyone, until school starts. I'm afraid of being left alone. Well thanks for listening, I'm sorry if this note sounded whiny, I'm down to my last thread.
Sincerely,
Harry J. Potter
Harry sunk down into his bed and finally, at 1:00 in the morning, got some very well-deserved sleep.
::end Flashback::
Harry lay on his bed, exactly a year later, thinking sadly about that summer. It was awful, but thankfully, he had gotten through it. Dumbledore had let him stay the last month or so, with him at Hogwarts and had kept a fairly close watch on Harry to make sure he was doing well. Although Harry would still get depressed now and then, he was eternally grateful for Dumbledore for letting him stay at Hogwarts. By the time school had started, he was almost back to his normal self, only falling back into his old depression occasionally during the year. And then he had Ginny to help him out. She had been very good at comforting Harry, and he was very grateful for that.
Another good thing that had happened to Harry last year was Quidditch. Since Wood was gone, along with many other Gryffindor players, the remainder of the team elected Harry as the team captain. Although Harry had no idea how to make plays or anything of that sort, he had agreed, under one condition. He could have an assistant. The team, as well as Dumbledore, agreed. Harry approached Ron immediately after their first Quidditch practice and asked him if he would be his assistant. Ron was, of course, overjoyed, as was Harry.
Ron, as Harry had suspected, was perhaps an even better captain than Wood. He was, although technically second-in-command, the teams real master-mind of the plays and everyone knew it. Harry had always suspected Ron as being a good coach, after all, he was great at Chess. The Gryffindor Quidditch team was amazing! They swept the other teams away, all except Slytherin, they had beat them by only a small margin. Yes, all in all, 5th year hadn't been too bad.
Harry's thoughts were interrupted by the loud ringing of his alarm clock. Harry's hand quickly shot out to turn it off. For a long moment he sat there, silent, making sure the Dursleys hadn't waken up. Once he was reassured that everyone was still asleep, Harry walked over to the window and opened it half-way so that the rest of the owls could come in when they got here. Then he walked over to Hermione's present and opened the note.
Dear Harry,
How are you? I hope your depression hasn't come back at all. Well if it had I'm sure you would be at Hogwarts anyway. I have been having a great summer, how about you? Ron invited me over to his house again, this time for 1 week. Luckily his mother has lightened up about us, only coming in about 2 times a day to make sure we are "behaving". Brother. I am staying in Ginny's room, their guest room was taken by Bill, who had come by unexpectedly this summer. Guess what? Ginny has a boyfriend! But sorry, I'm not allowed to tell anyone who it is. I'm not even allowed to tell Ron she has one, which makes sense, you know how protective Ron is of his little sister. Its pretty sad...
I hope you like your present, its not a book, for the second time in your life! And its not a broom kit either, sorry. Still, I think you will like it! Well anyway, Happy Birthday! I'll see you in a few weeks!
From,
Hermione Granger
Harry smiled. Gosh, Ginny has a boyfriend? I wonder who it is? Harry thought with a smile. Well at least I know for sure that she's over me. That's a relief. It was always a little awkward talking to her and not knowing for sure. Harry smiled again and opened his present.
He looked at the big box Hermione had sent him, puzzled. It was plastic, rather heavy with what looked like air holes all over it. There was also a little place on the side, labeled food. The quickly opened the top, wondering what kind of animal Hermione had sent him, hopefully it wasn't a cat! It wasn't.
Harry gasped in surprise and happiness. Hermione had sent him a snake! It was all black and medium in size. Its head was rather small and it had a single green stripe across its neck. Its eyes were blood red, looking like two sparkling emeralds. Harry smiled and spoke to it, obviously in parsletounge.
"Hello, what's your name?"
"Hello Harry. I'm Arabic. It'sss very nice to meet you. The only Parsletounge in Hisstory who isn't on the dark sside."
Harry blushed a little at the compliment and looked at the box Arabic had been living in.
"Did my friend make you comfortable in that box-thing? It looks rather stuffy."
"Oh yess. Your friend is a very good sstudent Harry. She used many sspells to make it comfortable in there. Oh and there iss a note in there from her alsso, about me I ssuspect, although I can't ssee why sshe cant just trust me to tell you."
Harry smiled and looked inside the box. Sure enough there was a note taped to the side of box. Harry opened it and started reading.
Hey Harry,
I suspect the snake told you this was in here. At least I hope he did. This snake is very poisonous but don't worry, the owner assured me wont bite until told by his owner to. Plus I really doubt if he would kill the only person on earth, besides Voldemort, that can talk to snakes.
He is a magical snake, although nobody knows what he can do. Some snakes are said to be able to tell the future, tell how magical someone is, do magic themselves, heal people, or even read minds. Of course nobody really knows if all these are true because nobody can talk to snakes. Or at least hardly anybody. Still why don't you ask your friend if its true? I talked to Dumbledore already and he assured me that it was ok for you to have a pet snake, considering you can talk to them. I hope you like the snake, I didn't know what kind of personality they all had because, obviously I cant talk to them, so I just picked out the one I thought was prettiest. Don't you love his red eyes?! Ok, well hope you liked your present! Bye!
Hermione G.
Harry looked over at Arabic and smiled.
"So your poisonous are you? Neat, just don't bite anyone unless I'm being attacked by death eaters, ok?" Arabic agreed.
"Are you really magical? Hermione said that there was a rumor you guys were, but obviously most people cant speak to you so nobody knows."
"Yess, I am a magical snake. I can sometimes tell the future and if somebody who is very in touch with their magical limits, like your friend Hermione, is nearby I can feel their magical powers. I can also heal people, but only if they are near to death and close to me. So I could probably heal you if you were almost dead."
Harry smiled. "What do you mean though, by magical limits? You mean how much magic they have?"
Arabic seemed to be thinking, then said slowly. "No, not like that. It'ss kind of like... well. Ok, its like if somebody knows just how much magic they have, if they use their magic to its extent. Like for instance, your friend Hermione. She has the average magical ability, but sshe is more, well, in tune with her magic you could ssay. She knows how much sshe has and she uses more of it, insstead of keeping it stored up insside her. Do you ssee?"
Harry thought for awhile, then nodded slowly. "Yes, I think I do. How about me, do I use most of my magic?"
Arabic looked puzzled for a second, then said slowly. "Well no, actually, you use hardly any of it. Or at least that'ss how I feel. But you feel like you usse are using almost as much as Hermione. That's sstrange. Oh well, my main sstrength is prophecy sso I may be wrong."
Harry smiled and looked at the clock. "Holy shit, its 2:00. I think I'm going to bed now. Where do you want to ssleep Arabic? I could make you a makeshift bed, or you could sleep in your box. Which do you prefer?"
Arabic looked at the box for a moment then said.
"Well the sspells Hermione used on the box are getting dimmer, since she wasn't allowed to use much power. She had to ask Dumbledore before she could perform them you see. But they are fine enough tonight. Still do you think you could make me a little place where I could ssleep tomorrow? It will be rather uncomfortable to sleep in a box without the spells."
Harry nodded his head sleepily and put Arabic into the box, then slowly got into bed, suddenly very tired. 'I'll open the rest of my presents tomorrow.' Thought Harry sleepily before he drifted off to sleep...
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A/N: Ok, so what do you guys think? Good, bad? Should I continue? And yes, this is the right story. Harry will be a powerful person, but don't worry, he wont be an all-powerful person who is much more powerful than Voldemort so he has no trouble defeating him, don't worry. He is a necromiser, and can see ghosts bla bla bla. You'll see later, if people want this story to continue. Please write me and tell me if you do! I will continue if I get more than 5 reviews, ok? Thanks so much. If I do write more it should probably be up in about 1 week or so. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!