Title: Affair With Death...
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the HP characters, although I personally think that JK Rowling should just get it over with and give them to me...
A/N: Just to warn you guys, this chapter is REALLY long! I hope you don't mind long chapters.
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Harry sat down wearily in the brown leather chair in front of Dumbledore's mahogany desk and looked nervously around. The office looked much as it always had, sleeping pictures of past headmasters ordaining the walls, Fawkes sitting calmly on her perch behind Dumbledore's chair.
Dumbledore looked quietly at Harry, lines of worry creasing his brows, his twinkling blue eyes dimmed a little, specks of fear apparent in his gaze. There seemed to be something different about Potter, he had an aura surrounding him. Not the strong, protective aura he had always had before, filled with a kind of reckless instinct. No, Harry felt different now, he seemed stronger, as if he was aware of himself now, knew his power, but he also felt weak and small, as if he was terrified of something, just keeping his emotions in check.
Harry continued to look around the office, trying desperately to stall time, to keep himself safe a little bit longer, keep his mind in the quiet stupor it had gone into. Keep him from thinking about what had happened.
Finally Harry met Dumbledore's gaze with his own green stare.
"Voldemort attacked my house." Harry said shortly, his voice held something akin to fear in it.
Dumbledore slowly sat down in the wooden chair by his desk, saying nothing, his blue eyes quietly telling Harry to keep talking.
"He got through the wards and he..." Harry paused, trying desperately to stay in the instinctive, shocked state he had been in the whole time. But reality was slowly sinking in.
Dumbledore looked at Harry, very anxious now. Harry's blank face was quickly falling away, replacing it was the honest, fierce face Harry had always worn before. It seemed to be showing up less and less since last summer.
Harry finally won the struggle with his emotions again, his mind turning to automatic. Slowly Harry spoke again, knowing that he couldn't stop himself forever.
"He killed the Dursleys Dumbledore. My last blood relatives."
Dumbledore's eyes filled with understanding and he quietly patted the young hero on the shoulder. Harry looked up at Dumbledore with sadness in his eyes. Then he continued talking again, quickly this time, as if he was afraid he would loose his nerve if he thought about what he was saying.
"I tried to tell them to hide, but they-they wouldn't listen to me. They told me that they wouldn't fall for my stupid tricks. I-I left them there to die Dumbledore. I didn't try to save them." Harry's voice cracked with emotion, his green eyes flooded with guilt and horror.
"Oh god Dumbledore, I left them there to die. I could have saved them, I could have made them move. I could have used magic. But I left them there to die!" The cold reality hit Harry with a sudden blast. He, Harry Potter, the boy known for his loyalty and bravery had run. He had run away from the Dursleys. Not because he was especially scared. No, it was because he truly didn't care all that much.
Dumbledore watched in sadness as Harry realized what had happened. In a split second Harry's strong, cold demeanor fell away and his emerald eyes filled with tears. Quickly he buried his head in his arms, collapsing silently onto the desk. His shoulders shook with grief, sobs quietly escaping his chapped lips.
Dumbledore stood quietly next to Harry, quietly patting the boys back. After about 10 minutes of trying to sooth Harry without any response from the raven-haired boy, Dumbledore stood up and put his hands on Harry's shoulders and muttered something under his breath.
Slowly Harry's sobs grew fainter and he became aware of Dumbledore again. Quietly Harry raised his head off Dumbledore's desk and wiped his eyes, blushing a little, the occasional shaky sob still escaping his mouth.
"I'm s-sorry Dumbledore, I don't know what came over me. I-I have never cried that hard before." Harry said, his voice still a little shaky an apologetic smile on his face.
Dumbledore smiled back, his eyes twinkling once again with understanding.
"Don't worry about it Harry. If I am guessing correctly, there is more to the story that you have yet to tell me. Many a full-grown wizard would have broken down under the pressure you have been under long before this. I am sorry I had to stop you early, I know that crying often does much good, but I am afraid I must know the rest of the story Harry. You know by now how much easier it is to tell a story when it is still fresh in your mind."
Harry nodded slowly, knowing that Dumbledore was right. Quickly he wiped his eyes clear of any tears and continued in his story. Slowly Harry settled down again as he spoke, his voice gradually lost its squeakiness, his breath no longer shaky.
Dumbledore listened quietly, dawning surprise and even respect slowly coming to rest on his old features. He watched the boy in awe as Harry spoke of the power coursing through him, and looked very surprised when Harry explained that he had apperated to Hogsmeade.
Harry continued to talk, feeling mixed emotions as he spoke. His mind was whirling with questions and ideas. Everything he had known about himself seemed thrown upside down, Harry felt as if he didn't know what he would do in any situation anymore. Always before when he had faced Voldemort, he had felt fear, anger and disgust for the man standing in front of him. Ever since he had learned of Voldemort's existence he had felt these emotions. He hated Voldemort worse then Draco, worse than Snape, worse even then Pettigrew, though only by a small amount. But never before had his hatred risen to such a level. Voldemort had made him so angry, Harry could feel hatred and fury rushing through him like a tidal wave, coursing through his heart and mind, poisoning any logical thoughts he had. A strong need to kill Voldemort had taken hold of him, and Harry knew that if it wasn't for his parents death, he would have shot the killing curse at Voldemort, he would have killed Voldemort the very same way Voldemort had killed his own parents. He was cold, heartless and angry. And it terrified him...
Dumbledore watched in silence as Harry sat, slumped low in the brown leather chair, looking as if the very foundations of life had been taken out from under him. Dumbledore could only imagine what could be going through the young mans mind right now, as stressed as he was. Harry's green eyes were clouded over in weariness, the usual merriness gone from them. His young face was sullen and weary, as if he was a teen stressed with a long term paper. Unfortunately Harry's problems were much more complicated then a simple paper being due. Although how complicated, Dumbledore wasn't yet sure. Just how powerful was Harry? Was the burst of magical skill just due to the flood of emotion Harry had experienced, or was that simply the icebreaker? Was Harry really so powerful he could perform a complicated spell against the most powerful wizard in the world without a wand? And if he was, what did this mean? Dumbledore sighed softly and looked at Harry's weary face.
"Harry." Dumbledore said softly, a small smile on his lips. "You had better get to bed, you look as if you could use some sleep. You can sleep in the Gryffindor house, although we may get you a room closer to the rest of the staff if you continue to stay here. The password is "godric" I know that you want to know what this new chapter in your famous story means, but frankly I am not sure yet Harry. I will have to do some research, maybe test you out on various skills sometime this week. I promise that if I learn anything in the least, I will tell you immediately Harry. Now, go on and get some sleep, you may eat at the staff table tomorrow morning. Your bags are already in you room. Goodnight Harry."
Harry smiled thankfully at the kind wizard standing before him. "Goodnight headmaster." Harry said quietly. Slowly he walked down the winding staircase and into the hallway of Hogwarts.
Immediately exhaustion overtook Harry, weighing his feet down as if they were made out of lead. Harry shuffled his way towards the Gryffindor portrait, his shoulders slumped a little, his head bent.
Finally, when Harry was sure he couldn't walk and longer, the fat lady came into sight. Harry smiled in happiness, no matter what the circumstances, he was always happy to be home.
"Godric." Harry said in a tired but somewhat happy voice to the fat lady.
"Yes dear." The fat lady answered with a smile, swinging forward to reveal the Gryffindor common room.
Harry smiled and walked inside. It was odd to see the common room empty. The fire sent cozy but somehow lonely shadows across the walls, the couches looking distinctly bare without the bodies of Seamus or Dean draped across them, laughing and talking animatedly to the other students. The mahogany tables were bare, showing all the scratches and ink marks left by impatient pupils hurriedly doing their homework.
Harry sighed and started to walk upstairs and into the boy's room, but stopped himself before going into the dorm. It didn't seem right, sleeping in the dorm without all of the other Gryffindor staying there, it would be so empty.
Harry smiled at himself, but made his way back down the steep steps and back into the common room. Slowly he made his way to the couches positioned in a semi-circle around the fireplace and collapsed onto the nearest one, burying his head in the soft pillow and falling instantly asleep, exhausted from the days happenings.
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Harry woke slowly the next morning, the dying fire lighting his face up in a strange red-orange glow. Slowly Harry opened his clear, honest eyes and looked around in contentment. A small smile graced his lips and slowly the teen sat up on the couch, leisurely pulling off the covers that were twisted around his body.
Harry sat peacefully, staring absently at the dying embers of the fire. Harry felt safer and more peaceful than he could ever remember feeling. The Gryffindor common room was quiet without being ominous, the soft tick of the clock the only noise in the large room.
Harry stretched leisurely, his t-shirt traveling up his semi-muscular stomach. Harry smiled and glanced at the cock hanging on the wall, 8:30. Slowly Harry stood up and walked up to the nearest mirror, looking at himself, amused.
Harry had been so exhausted the night before, he hadn't bothered changing out of his clothes. Heck, he had even left his glasses on! His t-shirt was wrinkled and dirty from the tunnel he had walked through the night before. His khakis were a slight brown, dried mud caking the bottom of them, grass stains on his knees, still there from the weeding he had been doing the day before. Harry tried, as usual, to tame his black hair, knowing that he would fail.
Harry rummaged in the bag he had quickly packed the day before for some clean clothes, quickly throwing them on. Then, with a final look in the mirror, he walked briskly out the door.
Harry walked down the hall absently, a slight smile on his tanned face. 'God, I'm in such a stupidly happy mood!' Harry thought, trying to be disgusted at himself, but failed miserably
Harry pushed the doors of the great hall open and walked towards the staff table, lightness in his step that wasn't there before.
Most of the staff had already eaten, only Dumbledore, Snape and a new professor were seated at the large table. Harry looked at the new teacher, who was faced away from him. For some reason, Harry felt sure that he knew the man sitting there, although he couldn't tell for sure only from the back of his head.
Just then Dumbledore looked up from the animated conversation with Snape, smiling kindly at Harry, his blue eyes sparkling with merriment.
"Hello Harry." Dumbledore said, warmth in his voice. "Have you noticed we have a new teacher here Harry?"
Harry looked over at the new professor again, sure now that he knew the man, although he couldn't place him unless... The man turned around, a happy smile lighting up his angular face.
"Lupin!" Harry shouted happily. "Are you teaching DADA again? How's Si-er Snuffles?"
Remus smiled happily at his former pupil, happily excepting the hug his friend's son gave him.
"Hey Harry! Ya, I'm taking over Professor Figg's spot, she decided to retire this summer, something about a broken hip. Snuffles if fine, don't worry, he should be coming here later this week, he was to busy at the moment to come and see you here, but he said he couldn't miss a chance to see his godson for awhile."
"You know you don't have to call him Snuffles, anybody here can figure out who you two are talking about in a second." Snape's voice cut through their happy conversation, a sneer gracing his thin, pale face.
Harry glared at his teacher angrily, then turned back to Lupin and continued talking.
Harry watched Remus talk, a contented smile on his face. His former professor looked much better than he had the first time he had appeared at Hogwarts, when Harry was still in his third year. His robes, although a little worn, were still in good condition, and his face was not nearly as haggard looking as it had been. In some ways, Lupin looked younger then he had a whole three years earlier.
Harry smiled in happiness as he dug into his scrambled eggs and toast. He felt enveloped in comfort, surrounded by friends. Dumbledore sat a few chairs away, his mere presence a comfort to Harry, a testimony that everything would be fine, at least while he was in Hogwarts. On the other side of Harry was Lupin, his father's childhood friend, the man who taught Harry how to defend himself against the one thing that terrified him. Even the presence of Snape didn't dampen Harry's mood much, although the potions master was continually throwing looks of hatred towards Harry and Lupin, obviously peeved that he had to sit through Breakfast with one of his childhood enemies and his least favorite pupil.
Harry finished breakfast, but continued to chat to Lupin about various subjects, telling him about charms and DADA, happy just to be talking with nobody nagging him to stop.
Finally Dumbledore stopped Harry and Lupin's conversation, a smile on his face.
"Sorry to stop you two, but I need to talk to you two for awhile. Harry, yesterday I told Lupin of your fight with Voldemort and he had some very interesting ideas. Although none of them are based on any fact, or even much evidence, I have decided to do some tests on you, providing you agree." Dumbledore stopped at this, a question in his eyes. Harry looked a little nervous, but he readily nodded.
"Thank you. Now Harry, The first spell I am going to put on you simply shows us all exactly what you felt, saw, smelled etc yesterday. It's kind of like watching a movie, except we will hear your thoughts as well as see exactly what you saw. Do you agree to let me do this?"
Harry looked nervously at Dumbledore and Lupin. He wasn't sure he wanted people so close to him to hear the horrible thoughts he was thinking yesterday, but Harry knew this may help them find out just what yesterday meant. Slowly Harry nodded his head.
"Thank you Harry, I know this may be hard for you but it may provide some valuable information."
Dumbledore walked up to Harry and placed one hand on Harry's head. His eyes closed and his face was a picture of concentration. After about 5 minutes, Dumbledore opened his eyes again, a look of excitement apparent on his face.
"Wow Harry, now I know why you are able to throw off the imperious curse so well, you have the most stubborn mind I have ever seen, I was afraid for awhile that you wouldn't let me see the memory." Dumbledore looked happy when he said this, but Harry could sense a small bit of uneasiness in Dumbledore, as if he could barely believe what he was saying.
But the next second Harry had forgotten all about Dumbledore as the spell was activated. He was plunged back into his memory of yesterday. Everything was so realistic, Harry could swear he was standing in his room again. It smelled like The Dursleys room, he could feel the small draft his window let through the crack in the glass. Arabic was curled around his arm, his muscles tensed just like yesterday. Harry could feel himself sensing the Dark magic around the house like yesterday, he could feel the cold, voidless magic around Voldemort again.
Harry could feel himself go downstairs, absently thinking that it wouldn't be too bad if the Dursleys did die. But at the same time, Harry could feel the smooth wood of the seats in the Great hall, slightly warmed by his body heat. And he felt sad, knowing that his almost subconscious thought came true.
He could feel the Harry of the past begin to get angry when the Dursleys couldn't move, and was horrified to find that he wasn't all that sad when his former self realized that he would have to leave them there. Harry started back upstairs, all the while trying to bring himself to go back, but he could do nothing. The picture he was seeing was a memory only, it had already happened, and Harry knew he couldn't change the truth.
Harry saw himself walk up the old, wood stairs for a second time. Then he heard himself talking to Arabic, a cold drought of fear running through him. Still Harry in the present felt a smirk of satisfaction grace his face, knowing that this time he had defeated Voldemort for real, with no help from anybody else.
Harry sat in the wood chair, listening again to Voldemort's speech, feeling himself cringe from fear, yet at the same time, he was smiling at Voldemorts pointless speech, thinking how pointless the speeches really were.
Then Voldemort mentioned his friends, and part of Harry flared with anger, furious at Voldemort daring to bring his friends into the fight. But at the same time, Harry sat, calmly analyzing his own thoughts, measuring his anger.
Then Harry could feel the magic inside himself, churning like a sea in a tropical storm, threatening to break loose from the magical barrier Harry had unconsciously put up against himself.
The anger Harry felt inside himself terrified Harry. It was like a black hole, consuming all logical thought and inch of remorse. Only instinct and anger remained inside him. He was cold, heartless. Thoughts of murder and hatred swept over him, shaking the present day Harry to the core.
Suddenly the barrier crumbled, magic sweeping through Harry, washing over him, combining with the anger inside his mind, mixing together into a deadly poison.
Harry felt himself stretch out his arm, pointing straight at Voldemort, his mind composed and clear, magic and anger saturating his every thought.
Then, suddenly the memory faded again into the recesses of his mind. Harry slowly opened his eyes, fear and guilt in his green eyes. Slowly Harry looked at Dumbledore and Lupin, afraid of what he might see.
Lupin sat silently in his chair, his fingers white from gripping the sides of the wood chair. His face was a mix of emotions, worry and sadness, fear and tranquility.
Dumbledore looked at Harry gently, understanding gracing his worn face, kindness and sadness apparent in his blue eyes.
Harry smiled a little, reassured slightly by the kindness in both mans eyes.
"I-I don't usually think like that. I have never felt that... angry before." Harry said timidly, looking rather shyly at his shoes, afraid to meet either mans eyes.
"Harry, the fact that you have never felt even close to that much anger towards Voldemort shows incredible spirit and forgiveness on your part Harry. I am sure that if he had caused me so much pain and suffering in my life, I would have felt close to that angry every time anybody mentioned his name. I am surprised you managed to hold back such anger so long. You seem to be much stronger willed than most people say." Dumbledore's voice was warm and kind, with a trace of pride lacing his words.
Harry slowly met Remus' eyes, afraid of what he might find in the eyes of his fathers old friend.
Relief flooded Harry when he saw only kindness and respect in Lupin's eyes. Harry blushed a little at the kindness both men were showing him.
"Thank you." Harry said softly, then he looked again at Dumbledore.
"But what does this mean sir? Why did I have so much magical ability stored up inside me? Why did it break loose when I was angry? Does this mean that I can do strong magic from now on? Am I-"
"Harry." Dumbledore said in an amused voice. "Slow down. I'm not sure yet, although this has defiantly given me many suspicions and theories, but I have no solid information to give you yet. I am sorry, but I'm afraid you will have to wait until we know more about this situation."
Harry sighed, a little exasperated at Dumbledore's answer, but nodded meekly.
"Meanwhile, why don't you go into the Gryffindor common room and have some time to yourself. If you aren't too drained, both physically and emotionally, then I would like it if you came down in a couple hours to do some charms work and maybe a little DADA, just to see if your magical ability has been enhanced at all. Does that sound reasonable to you?"
Harry nodded his agreement.
"Good, then I'll see you down here at 2 and we will continue to figure out this mystery."
Harry smiled wearily at his teachers, then quietly slipped out the door.
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As soon as Harry was outside of hearing distance, Remus turned towards Dumbledore, worry in his face.
"Dumbledore, what do you mean by we don't have any one theory yet? Isn't it obvious to you what he is? All the evidence points to one thing only." Lupin's coffee-colored eyes were filled with worry mixed with excitement.
Dumbledore looked up from his cup of Earl Gray Tea he had just conjured.
"We do Lupin? Tell me, what do you think Harry is? I would like to have another opinion." Remus looked suddenly looked uncertain.
"Well, isn't it kind of obvious Dumbledore?" He said, perplexed.
"Not particularly. What do you suspect Remus?" Dumbledore's eyes were sparkling again, a small smile on his face.
Lupin seemed flustered.
"Well Sir, you know... I kind of suspected that, uh, he was an elementalist, but I suspect that that's not right because you would surely know if he was..."
Lupin trailed off, a slight blush appearing on his face.
Dumbledore looked at his former pupil in interest. He had never seen Lupin get embarrassed for next to no reason. Dumbledore smiled, trying not to laugh at the sight of a werewolf blushing.
"You mean because I'm an elementalist myself?" Dumbledore said, smiling.
"well yes, you being an air elementalist yourself, and, uh you know the sudden magical powers and all that stuff... I just figured that's what he must be, but, uh, obviously I was wrong because you would know how it feels I guess."
Lupin shook his head in disgust, appalled at his stupid bought of embarrassment. This was completely unlike him!
Dumbledore smiled again, then became serious once more.
"Actually, last night, I was sure that Harry was and elementalist. But a few things didn't really make sense. Harry was so distressed that his mind shut down, he was in a trance-like state when I first talked to him. Now its true that this sort of thing happened to me as well, but it didn't affect me nearly as strongly. If Harry were a normal person, I would simply have suspected that he had a harder time dealing with the stress, but Harry has had far more stressful experiences and he has always dealt exceptionally well with them. Still, I thought that he probably just a stronger elementalist yesterday, I just wanted to do a couple tests on him to make sure. But after the intensity of emotions, and the suddenness of his magical powers becoming activated, I think that Harry may be something completely separate from an elemental. His emotions were raised much more than any recorded elemental."
Lupin looked towards the doors that Harry had exited throughout, a look of awe and surprise etched on his tanned face.
"Are you saying that Harry may eventually be more powerful than you?" Lupin looked at Dumbledore with slight disbelief in his coffee-colored eyes.
"I am saying nothing yet. He may only be powerful when he is angry, or feeling strong emotion. Or it may have been a once in a lifetime experience, but if my suspicions are correct, this is entirely possible."
Lupin looked at the old man in interest. Unconsciously he leaned slightly forward.
"What are your suspicions? What do you think Harry is?" Remus' face was alight with curiosity, and for a moment, Dumbledore was strongly reminded of the eager young boy Lupin used to be.
Dumbledore smiled secretively, his eyes sparkling with laughter.
"Sorry, I don't tell anyone anything unless I'm sure about what I say." Lupin's face filled with disappointment. He looked up to ask Dumbledore another question, but stopped short and simply smiled at the old man.
Dumbledore was looking blankly at the wall behind Lupin, his eyes clouded, lost in thought. Dumbledore muttered softly to himself, slight excitement appearing on his weathered face.
"If my suspicions are correct... Merlin, I think I'll have another look Arabic's prophecy... It may come in handy."
Lupin looked at the white-haired man standing in front of him in puzzlement. Well, nobody could ever expect to understand Dumbledore. He was really beyond understanding...
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A/N: Phew! This chapter was LONG! Well, I tried to make sure my writing was more detailed, and creative. What do you think? Was this chapter better written? Worse? The same? Feel free to give me comments on my style! Is it just me being picky with my writing, or does my story seem kind of rushed, like I don't describe enough? Please feel free to give me some constructive criticism on my work, I'm a relatively new author, and my style is always changing. Thanks to all who reviewed my story last chapter, and I'm sorry I haven't been thanking people individually, I usually try to do that. ::slaps forehead:: I'll try to do that next chapter, I promise, this one is already too long.
Could u please review this chpt for me, even if you have before in previous chapters. I am really exhausted from writing this long chapter, and even a simple sentence would boost my writing! ::Hopeful grin:: Please?! O and sorry if there is any mistakes, 12 pages is hard to spell check and grammerize! Or whatever that's called...
Please R AND R! It REALLY helps me write faster. I can't write without having reviews! Thanks again everyone who has reviewed, especially SADIMEAS, who has reviewed every chapter of BOTH my stories! THANX!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the HP characters, although I personally think that JK Rowling should just get it over with and give them to me...
A/N: Just to warn you guys, this chapter is REALLY long! I hope you don't mind long chapters.
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Harry sat down wearily in the brown leather chair in front of Dumbledore's mahogany desk and looked nervously around. The office looked much as it always had, sleeping pictures of past headmasters ordaining the walls, Fawkes sitting calmly on her perch behind Dumbledore's chair.
Dumbledore looked quietly at Harry, lines of worry creasing his brows, his twinkling blue eyes dimmed a little, specks of fear apparent in his gaze. There seemed to be something different about Potter, he had an aura surrounding him. Not the strong, protective aura he had always had before, filled with a kind of reckless instinct. No, Harry felt different now, he seemed stronger, as if he was aware of himself now, knew his power, but he also felt weak and small, as if he was terrified of something, just keeping his emotions in check.
Harry continued to look around the office, trying desperately to stall time, to keep himself safe a little bit longer, keep his mind in the quiet stupor it had gone into. Keep him from thinking about what had happened.
Finally Harry met Dumbledore's gaze with his own green stare.
"Voldemort attacked my house." Harry said shortly, his voice held something akin to fear in it.
Dumbledore slowly sat down in the wooden chair by his desk, saying nothing, his blue eyes quietly telling Harry to keep talking.
"He got through the wards and he..." Harry paused, trying desperately to stay in the instinctive, shocked state he had been in the whole time. But reality was slowly sinking in.
Dumbledore looked at Harry, very anxious now. Harry's blank face was quickly falling away, replacing it was the honest, fierce face Harry had always worn before. It seemed to be showing up less and less since last summer.
Harry finally won the struggle with his emotions again, his mind turning to automatic. Slowly Harry spoke again, knowing that he couldn't stop himself forever.
"He killed the Dursleys Dumbledore. My last blood relatives."
Dumbledore's eyes filled with understanding and he quietly patted the young hero on the shoulder. Harry looked up at Dumbledore with sadness in his eyes. Then he continued talking again, quickly this time, as if he was afraid he would loose his nerve if he thought about what he was saying.
"I tried to tell them to hide, but they-they wouldn't listen to me. They told me that they wouldn't fall for my stupid tricks. I-I left them there to die Dumbledore. I didn't try to save them." Harry's voice cracked with emotion, his green eyes flooded with guilt and horror.
"Oh god Dumbledore, I left them there to die. I could have saved them, I could have made them move. I could have used magic. But I left them there to die!" The cold reality hit Harry with a sudden blast. He, Harry Potter, the boy known for his loyalty and bravery had run. He had run away from the Dursleys. Not because he was especially scared. No, it was because he truly didn't care all that much.
Dumbledore watched in sadness as Harry realized what had happened. In a split second Harry's strong, cold demeanor fell away and his emerald eyes filled with tears. Quickly he buried his head in his arms, collapsing silently onto the desk. His shoulders shook with grief, sobs quietly escaping his chapped lips.
Dumbledore stood quietly next to Harry, quietly patting the boys back. After about 10 minutes of trying to sooth Harry without any response from the raven-haired boy, Dumbledore stood up and put his hands on Harry's shoulders and muttered something under his breath.
Slowly Harry's sobs grew fainter and he became aware of Dumbledore again. Quietly Harry raised his head off Dumbledore's desk and wiped his eyes, blushing a little, the occasional shaky sob still escaping his mouth.
"I'm s-sorry Dumbledore, I don't know what came over me. I-I have never cried that hard before." Harry said, his voice still a little shaky an apologetic smile on his face.
Dumbledore smiled back, his eyes twinkling once again with understanding.
"Don't worry about it Harry. If I am guessing correctly, there is more to the story that you have yet to tell me. Many a full-grown wizard would have broken down under the pressure you have been under long before this. I am sorry I had to stop you early, I know that crying often does much good, but I am afraid I must know the rest of the story Harry. You know by now how much easier it is to tell a story when it is still fresh in your mind."
Harry nodded slowly, knowing that Dumbledore was right. Quickly he wiped his eyes clear of any tears and continued in his story. Slowly Harry settled down again as he spoke, his voice gradually lost its squeakiness, his breath no longer shaky.
Dumbledore listened quietly, dawning surprise and even respect slowly coming to rest on his old features. He watched the boy in awe as Harry spoke of the power coursing through him, and looked very surprised when Harry explained that he had apperated to Hogsmeade.
Harry continued to talk, feeling mixed emotions as he spoke. His mind was whirling with questions and ideas. Everything he had known about himself seemed thrown upside down, Harry felt as if he didn't know what he would do in any situation anymore. Always before when he had faced Voldemort, he had felt fear, anger and disgust for the man standing in front of him. Ever since he had learned of Voldemort's existence he had felt these emotions. He hated Voldemort worse then Draco, worse than Snape, worse even then Pettigrew, though only by a small amount. But never before had his hatred risen to such a level. Voldemort had made him so angry, Harry could feel hatred and fury rushing through him like a tidal wave, coursing through his heart and mind, poisoning any logical thoughts he had. A strong need to kill Voldemort had taken hold of him, and Harry knew that if it wasn't for his parents death, he would have shot the killing curse at Voldemort, he would have killed Voldemort the very same way Voldemort had killed his own parents. He was cold, heartless and angry. And it terrified him...
Dumbledore watched in silence as Harry sat, slumped low in the brown leather chair, looking as if the very foundations of life had been taken out from under him. Dumbledore could only imagine what could be going through the young mans mind right now, as stressed as he was. Harry's green eyes were clouded over in weariness, the usual merriness gone from them. His young face was sullen and weary, as if he was a teen stressed with a long term paper. Unfortunately Harry's problems were much more complicated then a simple paper being due. Although how complicated, Dumbledore wasn't yet sure. Just how powerful was Harry? Was the burst of magical skill just due to the flood of emotion Harry had experienced, or was that simply the icebreaker? Was Harry really so powerful he could perform a complicated spell against the most powerful wizard in the world without a wand? And if he was, what did this mean? Dumbledore sighed softly and looked at Harry's weary face.
"Harry." Dumbledore said softly, a small smile on his lips. "You had better get to bed, you look as if you could use some sleep. You can sleep in the Gryffindor house, although we may get you a room closer to the rest of the staff if you continue to stay here. The password is "godric" I know that you want to know what this new chapter in your famous story means, but frankly I am not sure yet Harry. I will have to do some research, maybe test you out on various skills sometime this week. I promise that if I learn anything in the least, I will tell you immediately Harry. Now, go on and get some sleep, you may eat at the staff table tomorrow morning. Your bags are already in you room. Goodnight Harry."
Harry smiled thankfully at the kind wizard standing before him. "Goodnight headmaster." Harry said quietly. Slowly he walked down the winding staircase and into the hallway of Hogwarts.
Immediately exhaustion overtook Harry, weighing his feet down as if they were made out of lead. Harry shuffled his way towards the Gryffindor portrait, his shoulders slumped a little, his head bent.
Finally, when Harry was sure he couldn't walk and longer, the fat lady came into sight. Harry smiled in happiness, no matter what the circumstances, he was always happy to be home.
"Godric." Harry said in a tired but somewhat happy voice to the fat lady.
"Yes dear." The fat lady answered with a smile, swinging forward to reveal the Gryffindor common room.
Harry smiled and walked inside. It was odd to see the common room empty. The fire sent cozy but somehow lonely shadows across the walls, the couches looking distinctly bare without the bodies of Seamus or Dean draped across them, laughing and talking animatedly to the other students. The mahogany tables were bare, showing all the scratches and ink marks left by impatient pupils hurriedly doing their homework.
Harry sighed and started to walk upstairs and into the boy's room, but stopped himself before going into the dorm. It didn't seem right, sleeping in the dorm without all of the other Gryffindor staying there, it would be so empty.
Harry smiled at himself, but made his way back down the steep steps and back into the common room. Slowly he made his way to the couches positioned in a semi-circle around the fireplace and collapsed onto the nearest one, burying his head in the soft pillow and falling instantly asleep, exhausted from the days happenings.
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Harry woke slowly the next morning, the dying fire lighting his face up in a strange red-orange glow. Slowly Harry opened his clear, honest eyes and looked around in contentment. A small smile graced his lips and slowly the teen sat up on the couch, leisurely pulling off the covers that were twisted around his body.
Harry sat peacefully, staring absently at the dying embers of the fire. Harry felt safer and more peaceful than he could ever remember feeling. The Gryffindor common room was quiet without being ominous, the soft tick of the clock the only noise in the large room.
Harry stretched leisurely, his t-shirt traveling up his semi-muscular stomach. Harry smiled and glanced at the cock hanging on the wall, 8:30. Slowly Harry stood up and walked up to the nearest mirror, looking at himself, amused.
Harry had been so exhausted the night before, he hadn't bothered changing out of his clothes. Heck, he had even left his glasses on! His t-shirt was wrinkled and dirty from the tunnel he had walked through the night before. His khakis were a slight brown, dried mud caking the bottom of them, grass stains on his knees, still there from the weeding he had been doing the day before. Harry tried, as usual, to tame his black hair, knowing that he would fail.
Harry rummaged in the bag he had quickly packed the day before for some clean clothes, quickly throwing them on. Then, with a final look in the mirror, he walked briskly out the door.
Harry walked down the hall absently, a slight smile on his tanned face. 'God, I'm in such a stupidly happy mood!' Harry thought, trying to be disgusted at himself, but failed miserably
Harry pushed the doors of the great hall open and walked towards the staff table, lightness in his step that wasn't there before.
Most of the staff had already eaten, only Dumbledore, Snape and a new professor were seated at the large table. Harry looked at the new teacher, who was faced away from him. For some reason, Harry felt sure that he knew the man sitting there, although he couldn't tell for sure only from the back of his head.
Just then Dumbledore looked up from the animated conversation with Snape, smiling kindly at Harry, his blue eyes sparkling with merriment.
"Hello Harry." Dumbledore said, warmth in his voice. "Have you noticed we have a new teacher here Harry?"
Harry looked over at the new professor again, sure now that he knew the man, although he couldn't place him unless... The man turned around, a happy smile lighting up his angular face.
"Lupin!" Harry shouted happily. "Are you teaching DADA again? How's Si-er Snuffles?"
Remus smiled happily at his former pupil, happily excepting the hug his friend's son gave him.
"Hey Harry! Ya, I'm taking over Professor Figg's spot, she decided to retire this summer, something about a broken hip. Snuffles if fine, don't worry, he should be coming here later this week, he was to busy at the moment to come and see you here, but he said he couldn't miss a chance to see his godson for awhile."
"You know you don't have to call him Snuffles, anybody here can figure out who you two are talking about in a second." Snape's voice cut through their happy conversation, a sneer gracing his thin, pale face.
Harry glared at his teacher angrily, then turned back to Lupin and continued talking.
Harry watched Remus talk, a contented smile on his face. His former professor looked much better than he had the first time he had appeared at Hogwarts, when Harry was still in his third year. His robes, although a little worn, were still in good condition, and his face was not nearly as haggard looking as it had been. In some ways, Lupin looked younger then he had a whole three years earlier.
Harry smiled in happiness as he dug into his scrambled eggs and toast. He felt enveloped in comfort, surrounded by friends. Dumbledore sat a few chairs away, his mere presence a comfort to Harry, a testimony that everything would be fine, at least while he was in Hogwarts. On the other side of Harry was Lupin, his father's childhood friend, the man who taught Harry how to defend himself against the one thing that terrified him. Even the presence of Snape didn't dampen Harry's mood much, although the potions master was continually throwing looks of hatred towards Harry and Lupin, obviously peeved that he had to sit through Breakfast with one of his childhood enemies and his least favorite pupil.
Harry finished breakfast, but continued to chat to Lupin about various subjects, telling him about charms and DADA, happy just to be talking with nobody nagging him to stop.
Finally Dumbledore stopped Harry and Lupin's conversation, a smile on his face.
"Sorry to stop you two, but I need to talk to you two for awhile. Harry, yesterday I told Lupin of your fight with Voldemort and he had some very interesting ideas. Although none of them are based on any fact, or even much evidence, I have decided to do some tests on you, providing you agree." Dumbledore stopped at this, a question in his eyes. Harry looked a little nervous, but he readily nodded.
"Thank you. Now Harry, The first spell I am going to put on you simply shows us all exactly what you felt, saw, smelled etc yesterday. It's kind of like watching a movie, except we will hear your thoughts as well as see exactly what you saw. Do you agree to let me do this?"
Harry looked nervously at Dumbledore and Lupin. He wasn't sure he wanted people so close to him to hear the horrible thoughts he was thinking yesterday, but Harry knew this may help them find out just what yesterday meant. Slowly Harry nodded his head.
"Thank you Harry, I know this may be hard for you but it may provide some valuable information."
Dumbledore walked up to Harry and placed one hand on Harry's head. His eyes closed and his face was a picture of concentration. After about 5 minutes, Dumbledore opened his eyes again, a look of excitement apparent on his face.
"Wow Harry, now I know why you are able to throw off the imperious curse so well, you have the most stubborn mind I have ever seen, I was afraid for awhile that you wouldn't let me see the memory." Dumbledore looked happy when he said this, but Harry could sense a small bit of uneasiness in Dumbledore, as if he could barely believe what he was saying.
But the next second Harry had forgotten all about Dumbledore as the spell was activated. He was plunged back into his memory of yesterday. Everything was so realistic, Harry could swear he was standing in his room again. It smelled like The Dursleys room, he could feel the small draft his window let through the crack in the glass. Arabic was curled around his arm, his muscles tensed just like yesterday. Harry could feel himself sensing the Dark magic around the house like yesterday, he could feel the cold, voidless magic around Voldemort again.
Harry could feel himself go downstairs, absently thinking that it wouldn't be too bad if the Dursleys did die. But at the same time, Harry could feel the smooth wood of the seats in the Great hall, slightly warmed by his body heat. And he felt sad, knowing that his almost subconscious thought came true.
He could feel the Harry of the past begin to get angry when the Dursleys couldn't move, and was horrified to find that he wasn't all that sad when his former self realized that he would have to leave them there. Harry started back upstairs, all the while trying to bring himself to go back, but he could do nothing. The picture he was seeing was a memory only, it had already happened, and Harry knew he couldn't change the truth.
Harry saw himself walk up the old, wood stairs for a second time. Then he heard himself talking to Arabic, a cold drought of fear running through him. Still Harry in the present felt a smirk of satisfaction grace his face, knowing that this time he had defeated Voldemort for real, with no help from anybody else.
Harry sat in the wood chair, listening again to Voldemort's speech, feeling himself cringe from fear, yet at the same time, he was smiling at Voldemorts pointless speech, thinking how pointless the speeches really were.
Then Voldemort mentioned his friends, and part of Harry flared with anger, furious at Voldemort daring to bring his friends into the fight. But at the same time, Harry sat, calmly analyzing his own thoughts, measuring his anger.
Then Harry could feel the magic inside himself, churning like a sea in a tropical storm, threatening to break loose from the magical barrier Harry had unconsciously put up against himself.
The anger Harry felt inside himself terrified Harry. It was like a black hole, consuming all logical thought and inch of remorse. Only instinct and anger remained inside him. He was cold, heartless. Thoughts of murder and hatred swept over him, shaking the present day Harry to the core.
Suddenly the barrier crumbled, magic sweeping through Harry, washing over him, combining with the anger inside his mind, mixing together into a deadly poison.
Harry felt himself stretch out his arm, pointing straight at Voldemort, his mind composed and clear, magic and anger saturating his every thought.
Then, suddenly the memory faded again into the recesses of his mind. Harry slowly opened his eyes, fear and guilt in his green eyes. Slowly Harry looked at Dumbledore and Lupin, afraid of what he might see.
Lupin sat silently in his chair, his fingers white from gripping the sides of the wood chair. His face was a mix of emotions, worry and sadness, fear and tranquility.
Dumbledore looked at Harry gently, understanding gracing his worn face, kindness and sadness apparent in his blue eyes.
Harry smiled a little, reassured slightly by the kindness in both mans eyes.
"I-I don't usually think like that. I have never felt that... angry before." Harry said timidly, looking rather shyly at his shoes, afraid to meet either mans eyes.
"Harry, the fact that you have never felt even close to that much anger towards Voldemort shows incredible spirit and forgiveness on your part Harry. I am sure that if he had caused me so much pain and suffering in my life, I would have felt close to that angry every time anybody mentioned his name. I am surprised you managed to hold back such anger so long. You seem to be much stronger willed than most people say." Dumbledore's voice was warm and kind, with a trace of pride lacing his words.
Harry slowly met Remus' eyes, afraid of what he might find in the eyes of his fathers old friend.
Relief flooded Harry when he saw only kindness and respect in Lupin's eyes. Harry blushed a little at the kindness both men were showing him.
"Thank you." Harry said softly, then he looked again at Dumbledore.
"But what does this mean sir? Why did I have so much magical ability stored up inside me? Why did it break loose when I was angry? Does this mean that I can do strong magic from now on? Am I-"
"Harry." Dumbledore said in an amused voice. "Slow down. I'm not sure yet, although this has defiantly given me many suspicions and theories, but I have no solid information to give you yet. I am sorry, but I'm afraid you will have to wait until we know more about this situation."
Harry sighed, a little exasperated at Dumbledore's answer, but nodded meekly.
"Meanwhile, why don't you go into the Gryffindor common room and have some time to yourself. If you aren't too drained, both physically and emotionally, then I would like it if you came down in a couple hours to do some charms work and maybe a little DADA, just to see if your magical ability has been enhanced at all. Does that sound reasonable to you?"
Harry nodded his agreement.
"Good, then I'll see you down here at 2 and we will continue to figure out this mystery."
Harry smiled wearily at his teachers, then quietly slipped out the door.
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As soon as Harry was outside of hearing distance, Remus turned towards Dumbledore, worry in his face.
"Dumbledore, what do you mean by we don't have any one theory yet? Isn't it obvious to you what he is? All the evidence points to one thing only." Lupin's coffee-colored eyes were filled with worry mixed with excitement.
Dumbledore looked up from his cup of Earl Gray Tea he had just conjured.
"We do Lupin? Tell me, what do you think Harry is? I would like to have another opinion." Remus looked suddenly looked uncertain.
"Well, isn't it kind of obvious Dumbledore?" He said, perplexed.
"Not particularly. What do you suspect Remus?" Dumbledore's eyes were sparkling again, a small smile on his face.
Lupin seemed flustered.
"Well Sir, you know... I kind of suspected that, uh, he was an elementalist, but I suspect that that's not right because you would surely know if he was..."
Lupin trailed off, a slight blush appearing on his face.
Dumbledore looked at his former pupil in interest. He had never seen Lupin get embarrassed for next to no reason. Dumbledore smiled, trying not to laugh at the sight of a werewolf blushing.
"You mean because I'm an elementalist myself?" Dumbledore said, smiling.
"well yes, you being an air elementalist yourself, and, uh you know the sudden magical powers and all that stuff... I just figured that's what he must be, but, uh, obviously I was wrong because you would know how it feels I guess."
Lupin shook his head in disgust, appalled at his stupid bought of embarrassment. This was completely unlike him!
Dumbledore smiled again, then became serious once more.
"Actually, last night, I was sure that Harry was and elementalist. But a few things didn't really make sense. Harry was so distressed that his mind shut down, he was in a trance-like state when I first talked to him. Now its true that this sort of thing happened to me as well, but it didn't affect me nearly as strongly. If Harry were a normal person, I would simply have suspected that he had a harder time dealing with the stress, but Harry has had far more stressful experiences and he has always dealt exceptionally well with them. Still, I thought that he probably just a stronger elementalist yesterday, I just wanted to do a couple tests on him to make sure. But after the intensity of emotions, and the suddenness of his magical powers becoming activated, I think that Harry may be something completely separate from an elemental. His emotions were raised much more than any recorded elemental."
Lupin looked towards the doors that Harry had exited throughout, a look of awe and surprise etched on his tanned face.
"Are you saying that Harry may eventually be more powerful than you?" Lupin looked at Dumbledore with slight disbelief in his coffee-colored eyes.
"I am saying nothing yet. He may only be powerful when he is angry, or feeling strong emotion. Or it may have been a once in a lifetime experience, but if my suspicions are correct, this is entirely possible."
Lupin looked at the old man in interest. Unconsciously he leaned slightly forward.
"What are your suspicions? What do you think Harry is?" Remus' face was alight with curiosity, and for a moment, Dumbledore was strongly reminded of the eager young boy Lupin used to be.
Dumbledore smiled secretively, his eyes sparkling with laughter.
"Sorry, I don't tell anyone anything unless I'm sure about what I say." Lupin's face filled with disappointment. He looked up to ask Dumbledore another question, but stopped short and simply smiled at the old man.
Dumbledore was looking blankly at the wall behind Lupin, his eyes clouded, lost in thought. Dumbledore muttered softly to himself, slight excitement appearing on his weathered face.
"If my suspicions are correct... Merlin, I think I'll have another look Arabic's prophecy... It may come in handy."
Lupin looked at the white-haired man standing in front of him in puzzlement. Well, nobody could ever expect to understand Dumbledore. He was really beyond understanding...
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A/N: Phew! This chapter was LONG! Well, I tried to make sure my writing was more detailed, and creative. What do you think? Was this chapter better written? Worse? The same? Feel free to give me comments on my style! Is it just me being picky with my writing, or does my story seem kind of rushed, like I don't describe enough? Please feel free to give me some constructive criticism on my work, I'm a relatively new author, and my style is always changing. Thanks to all who reviewed my story last chapter, and I'm sorry I haven't been thanking people individually, I usually try to do that. ::slaps forehead:: I'll try to do that next chapter, I promise, this one is already too long.
Could u please review this chpt for me, even if you have before in previous chapters. I am really exhausted from writing this long chapter, and even a simple sentence would boost my writing! ::Hopeful grin:: Please?! O and sorry if there is any mistakes, 12 pages is hard to spell check and grammerize! Or whatever that's called...
Please R AND R! It REALLY helps me write faster. I can't write without having reviews! Thanks again everyone who has reviewed, especially SADIMEAS, who has reviewed every chapter of BOTH my stories! THANX!