LEGAL DISCLAIMER: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or any other
animé/game that I make reference to. Also, a forewarning to any Quatre or
Pegasus fans--they're the bashing targets this chapter. At this rate, it
won't be long before I end up bashing my idiotic self. Hey wait!
D'oh! Already did...
NON-LEGAL STUFF: This part is just for a very close friend, whom I shall
now address as Testi-kun so all who are not him shall know nothing! Hey, I
heard Monday what happened and why you're gone for a while. Sorry it took
me so long to do something about it, but I wasn't sure what to do. I'm
doing this here so you can get to it when you feel like it. Anyway, I
don't know how you're taking this loss, so bear with me. If you're really
struggling with it (I hope not), just remember that things like this are bound
to happen. I know I'm dreading the end of the school year when THAT
happens and you...yeah. But an imporant thing I learned from that book of
mine (which you probably still haven't read) is that one should live in the
present--not the past, and not the future. Keep the mind on what is
currently happening, not busying oneself regretting things in the past or
feeling nervous about future events. The book has many other important
lessons like this, so you should pick it up now, more than ever, and start
reading it. On the other hand, if you're doing OK with the whole thing,
that's good to hear. I hope to see you back in school soon and back to
your comical old self. by the way, we've had 3 GE things in that class you
like so much. They're all due tomorrow (5-16-03), but I don't think you
will have trouble catching up. Anyway, onward, to the far overdue fic
chapter 3!
HOW TO READ IT: *actions are italicized* "Dialog is in quotes." (Personal thoughts are in parentheses.)
Chapter 3: The Dueling FINALLY Begins!
*So what evil presence does Yugi feel...err, uh, sense?*
Yugi: "I sense an evil presence!"
Wufei: "You already said that once, dumbass! Now tell us who it is!"
Yugi: "It feels familiar...but pure evil...the hell?! QUIT MAKING ME FEEL THINGS!! IT'S SENSE!"
GTK: "Oh, sorry. My mistake. Won't happen again." (Yet.)
Yugi: "I heard that!"
Joey: "Yeah, Yugi boy here is psychic."
Pegasus: *appears* "Hey, I'm the only one that can address that bot by that name."
Kaiba: "Hey, Pegasus! It's time we had that duel of ours over at that table. And hey, are you that evil presence that's got Yugi's balls in a knot?" (Nothin' like making fun of people for repeating words)
Quatre: "Balls? Where?!" *drools*
Pegasus: "Uhh...right. No, I'm not the evil that has Yugi's infinitesimal genitals in a bind, but I'll tell you who it is if you can beat me in a duel."
Quatre: "GENITALS!!" *passes out*
Kaiba: "Stop that! Pegasus, my Blue Eyes White Dragons are gonna tear your nuts off!" *gets out cards*
Quatre: "NUTS!! You said nuts as in the--" *poof*
GTK: "Sorry about that, it seems he got a little carried away, so I sent him to another dimension."
Pegasus: "Listen, this isn't that pathetic show, Dragonball Z. Why not just admit you killed him?"
Quatre: *faintly heard from far away* "Dragon balls!!"
Kaiba: "Why couldn't you send that bastard farther away?! Imbecile!"
GTK: "Oh, bring him back you say..."
Kaiba: "NOOOOOO! Forget what I said! Pegasus!"
Pegasus: "Right, but how about fixing the scenery? All these cute little boys are making me so..." *blushes*
GTK: "Pedophi--oh, the scenery." *transports everyone to a bland mountainous area*
Kaiba: "The hell?!"
GTK: "Sorry, I guess I still had Dr--"
Kaiba: "Don't say it!"
GTK: "Oh, yeah. I still had DBZ on my mind."
All: *pause...sigh of relief*
Pegasus: "Now we need a table."
GTK: "Sure thing." *draws one in*
Kaiba: "What sorry excuse of a table is THAT?!"
GTK: "I guess I'm not much of an artist..."
Kaiba: "Tch...fiiiine." *sets cards down on wobbly table*
Pegasus: "You ready, Kaiba boy?"
Yugi: *loud and still with super saiya-jin powers* "IT'S TIME TO DUEL!!!" *nearly blows away Kaiba's cards*
Kaiba: "Watch it coc--I mean dic--or uh...DAMMIT! All my good insults would get that stupid Gundam pilot excited!"
GTK: "He has a point, Yugi. Therefore, loss of privileges." *makes Yugi normal again*
Kaiba: "Thanks...so, heads or tails?"
Pegasus: "Oh, I like both when it comes to young boys..."
Kaiba: "FOR THE COIN TOSS DAMMIT!"
Pegasus: "Tails then. Tch, way to go and disappoint me."
Kaiba: *flips heads* "Hah, I'm first." *draws hand of 2 Blue Eyes White Dragons, a Lord of D., a Flute of Summoning Dragon, and Pot of Greed* "Dammit, what a shitty hand." (I hope that fools him)
Pegasus: "Why don't you spend more time in the bathroom to clean yourself off? My Millennium Eye sees that the cards you drew are far from being bad..."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "Are too."
Kaiba: "Are not."
Pegasus: "ARE TOO!!!!"
Kaiba: "Fine, you're right. Damned cheater! I'm finished playing games with you!"
Pegasus: "Done with your turn, you say? But you didn't even do anything. Oh well, that's too bad." *draws Toon World, Monster Reborn, Toon Summoned Skull, Griggle, and Card Destruction* "I play Toon World and pay 1000 life points."
Yugi: "Ooo...that card allows toon monsters to be used on the field, which can attack direc--"
GTK: "Don't start this now! This is not the show! We don't need those gay explanations!!"
Pegasus: *sets Monster Reborn and plays Griggle* "Now, Card destruction to clear that hand of yours!"
Kaiba: "You bitch! Hah, but you killed your toon skull. Idiot."
Peg: "So you think." *flips Monster Reborn* "Now it's back, and ready to attack your life poi--oh yeah, no explanations. Hey...why has my name been truncated?"
Kaiba: "Maybe he realized that you act so much like a woman that you need a fitting name. And are you done with your turn yet?"
GTK: "Actually, I'm just lazy. Continue."
Peg: "Grr...no, I'm not done either. I'll set this card I got from playing Card Destruction earlier."
Kaiba: "My turn? Good. I play Change of Heart on that skull!"
Peg: "Not so fast!" *flips shift* "But you can take my Griggle instead. Thanks for the 3,000 life points too."
GTK: "Kaiba - 8,000. Pegasus - 10,000."
Kaiba: "Holy shit!" (dammit! Why'd I have to put so many Blue Eyes White Dragons in! I don't even have anything to tribute summon for this third one!)
Peg: "Sucks, doesn't it?"
Kaiba: "What, you boyfriend?"
Peg: "Hah. Simpleminded cretin. I was talking about your deck."
Kaiba: "You want my dick?! I'M NOT LIKE THAT!!"
Peg: "Anyway, I'm free to attack now, so I'll also equip my skull with this Axe of Despair."
GTK: "4500 to 9500. You're screwed, Kaiba."
Yugi: "Trust in the heart of the cards!"
Kaiba: "OK, fine." *draws an ancient telescope* "DAMMIT! Why's this in my deck?"
GTK: "Well, I based your decks mostly on the corresponding starter decks. Of course, that means you have a bunch of shit."
Kaiba: "Take your turn...PEG!" *stares angrily at GTK*
GTK: *twitches eyes back and forth*
Kaiba: "GAHH!! FREAK!!!!"
Pegasus: "Right...so umm...I'll attack again and play this Tremendous Fire. I win!"
GTK: "Kaiba - 0, Pegasus - 8,500."
Kaiba: "D'OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" *runs away*
Pegasus: "So, I guess I don't have to tell you who the evil guy is then.
GTK: "Hold up. You'll duel me now."
Pegasus: "What do you know? You're not even a character in the series! Let's go newbie!"
GTK: "True, but Joey can't duel for shit and yet he is a character."
Pegasus: "Oh, yeah. Good point. Let's see what you can do then!"
*As Kaiba sulks over his defeat, Pegasus and GTK prepare to duel! Can I, the writer of this fic, beat Pegasus and get the information?*
*Phoenixfire, friend of GTK and Kaiba lookalike, suddenly appears*
Phoenixfire: "We all know you have script immunity. Why not just call yourself Yugi?"
GTK: "Eh? I've lost many duels before...I've even been finished off by a Kuriboh once, remember?"
Phoenixfire: "Oh yeah, I did do that, didn't I? well good luck, and until we meet again..."
*So ends Chapter 3. Pegasus and GTK duel next Chapter! As an added bonus, somebody gets bashed yet again!*