Destiny Lost
#2: In the Space of Desire
Authors: Sonya and Erin
E-mail: sonyajeb@swbell.net OR carynsilver@yahoo.com
Rating: PG-13
Category: B/X, O/Other, AU, action/adventure, romance
Summary: This is a sequel to our epic saga "In the Space of a Heartbeat," which is a story about what would happen if Buffy had never gotten the Slayer powers.
Disclaimer: We do not own Buffy or any of the original characters or ideas from the show. They all belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc. All we own is our own creative genius (unless that's too strong a word :) and any characters we make up.
Distribution: Regulars... SURE!!! Newbies... ask and you shall recieve!
Feedback: Love it! We want to know your likes AND dislikes. Flames are the only thing we do not accept.
Spoilers: None much for the shows, but heavy spoilers for the earlier installments of this fanfic series!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Chapter Four
Sunnydale High
Buffy and Xander had almost made it to the library when a lone figure turned the corner and came into view. It was a girl with longish blonde hair and a distinctive face. She walked with purpose. When Buffy looked at her, she thought that the girl looked like Buffy felt after getting her Slayer powers -- confident for the world to see. Buffy wondered if such confidence only came in formerly shy people -- Buffy had become extremely introverted after her accident, and was only now becoming more assertive again -- but then the Slayer pushed those thoughts away. While she had been drifting, Xander had yelled out a greeting to the new girl.
"Amy Madison! Long time no see! Where've you been hiding?" With a flash of a smile to Buffy, Xander dropped her hand and hugged the new girl.
The girl hugged him back. "I was living abroad with my dad. After everything that happened with my mom, and then at Halloween, Dad decided I needed some time away from this place."
"Well, wherever you were, it certainly agreed with you," Xander said, stepping back to look at her.
Amy preened under his scrutiny. Buffy was slightly jealous of the girl's cute outfit -- the green and blue tones really brought out her hair and fair complexion.
"We were all over the place. I got to see all of Europe, and I kept up with school through correspondence courses. Snyder didn't want to go with it, but Dad promised that his company would donate money to help the building fund so Snyder basically had no choice but to agree. The Mayor would have had his head if he hadn't."
"And now you're back."
"Yep, now I'm back. And better than before."
"I'm glad," Xander said with sincerity. "When you disappeared so soon after Halloween, I was a little worried about you."
Buffy took that instant to clear her throat. She stepped closer to Xander and slid a hand through his arm in what she knew was a possessive gesture.
Xander smiled and introduced her. "Amy, this is my girlfriend Buffy Summers. She moved to Sunnydale about a month ago."
Amy's smile seemed genuinely delighted. "I'm so glad to meet you, Buffy!" she said enthusiastically, pumping Buffy's proffered hand. "Xander... well, to put it bluntly, he saved my life. And it looks like you're making him happy. That is so great."
Her words made Buffy feel better and her jealousy mostly abated. "Thanks, Amy. It's nice to meet you, too." She glanced at Xander. "How did you save her life?"
"Spike kidnapped her. He wanted to use her as a vessel to bring back Drusilla, but a chaos demon got released instead. I had to blow up Snyder's car to stop it. It was a whole big thing." Xander looked a bit embarrassed.
Amy jumped in with, "It was the worst Halloween of my life!"
"Oh!" Understanding lit Buffy's gaze. "The Halloween Incident. Oz mentioned the rumors, but I never heard the whole story."
"Well," Amy said, "it's been really great to see you guys, but I've got to go to the office. I have an appointment with Snyder before I can start classes tomorrow. But I hope I'll see you both then..."
"Yeah," Buffy said. "I'll look for you."
"Great!" Amy replied. "See you later. It was great to meet you, Buffy." With a wave, the new girl was gone, and Buffy and Xander were alone in front of the library doors.
"I'm really glad she's OK," Xander said softly to Buffy. "She vanished after the Halloween thing, and I was worried she'd had a break down or something. She's had a pretty tough life. Her mom was a psycho-witch and tried to possess Amy's body or something. Giles told me about it once."
"Poor girl," Buffy said, looking down the hall after Amy. "We'll have to invite her to go out with us sometime. Maybe I'll get Oz to go, too."
"Are you trying to play matchmaker?" Xander accused.
Buffy smiled. "Guilty as charged. It's just, Oz has been such a good friend to me, and Amy seems like a really nice person. I had thought Oz and Sonya might hit it off. I even let it slip to him that she might need a ride to school today so they could be alone for awhile, but it doesn't look like anything is happening there." She paused, and then added, "Besides, for a minute there you and Amy were pretty chummy. If she dates Oz then I don't have to worry about that."
"You were jealous?" Xander asked. "Over me?"
"Well... yeah... a little." Buffy looked down at the ground, embarrassed.
"That's so sweet!" Xander swooped down and kissed her on the mouth. Buffy happily returned the kiss for a minute, and then they broke apart.
"I'm glad you weren't mad," Buffy said. "I was afraid you'd think I didn't trust you, and it's not that at all. I know you'd never stray."
"Stray... from the best thing that's ever happened to me? Never!" Xander vowed. "And actually, I'm more flattered than anything by the jealousy thing. I mean, we all have those weird feelings occasionally. It's normal. And they usually don't mean anything."
"Right," Buffy agreed. "Well, I guess we should go in."
Xander nodded. "Yep. But not before I get one more kiss." Buffy eagerly gave him what he asked for, and then they composed themselves and went inside the library.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"You're late," Sonya accused when they stepped inside.
"I know, I'm sorry," Xander said.
"We were... um... busy talking," Buffy added.
"Talking. Yeah, right." Sonya rolled her eyes and sarcasm dripped off her tongue.
"We were talking," Xander protested, "to Amy Madison. She's back."
"Great," Sonya said, "now that your little reunion is over, can we go? I'd like to get this done with, and we're going to be late as it is."
Xander looked at his watch. "No, we've still got enough time. The office is close."
"Whatever." Sonya wheeled herself out toward the parking lot, leaving Xander no choice but to follow. He gave Buffy a kiss on the cheek and jogged after Sonya.
Buffy watched them go, and when they were gone she looked over at Giles who stood by the circulation desk. "I hope everything goes all right."
"As do I," Giles said, staring after them as well. "As do I."
She detected a gleam of caring in his eyes as he looked after Sonya. Buffy knew that Giles cared a lot about Sonya. He'd turned his life inside out for her, and he was always so solicitous of her -- at least as solicitous as an Englishman could be. Buffy sighed. What did it matter? He was her Watcher, not her father. Her father was off gallivanting around the country with his new girlfriend Silvie -- a girl half his age. These thoughts were getting her nowhere!
"Giles, what are we doing today?"
The librarian seemed to come back into the moment with difficulty, and Buffy wondered where his thoughts had been.
"Ah, yes, training."
"Yes," Buffy repeated. "Training. That little thing we do every day to get me ready to face the minions of darkness every night. What are we doing today?"
Giles walked over to the weapons locker, removing his jacket on the way. He pulled two long, wooden staffs out and tossed one to Buffy.
"Stick fighting?" Buffy asked, catching it deftly and looking at it with a confused expression. "This would do me better cut up into a dozen stakes."
"Staff fighting," Giles corrected her in a long-suffering tone. "And it's very important. It's the first step toward learning many other types of fighting, such a sword play."
A smile lit Buffy's face. "Ooh -- swords. I want one."
"Not 'til you learn the basics of staff fighting." He lunged in and rapped her smartly on the shoulder.
"Ow!" Buffy cried. "No fair! You didn't say ready, set, go!"
Giles gave her one of his patented "looks" and then said, "Ready, set, go." He lunged in again, and this time Buffy was able to use her staff to block his strike.
"Now, Buffy," Giles said as they circled each other with the staffs, trading and evading blows, "you've got to be prepared at all times. Vampires and other forces of darkness won't give you a warning..." He jumped back as she darted in to hit him on the shoulder. He made it just in time. "Good shot."
"Thank you." Buffy accepted his praise in what she thought was a gracious manner. "I don't know why you're making such a big deal about this staff fighting. It's pretty easy. The cross bow was harder, and I picked that up on the first shot."
"Your powers lend themselves to the fighting arts," Giles said, trying to disguise his breathlessness as he dodged several of her attempted blows. "... but that doesn't mean you can just cavalierly skip any step you want to. It's a process... urg!" He grunted and doubled over a little when one of Buffy's raps hit home into his stomach.
Buffy paused at the pained look on his face. She stepped forward to help him. "Are you, OK, Giles?"
Giles waited until she was close enough to touch him before bringing his staff up behind her to trip her. The staff did it's work and knocked her off balance. "Aha! You see, never let your guard down... oof!" Buffy turned her fall into a flip and pulled his staff out of his hands with her feet. Then, grabbing the other staff with her hands, she flipped back up to her feet and rapped Giles smartly on the side.
"You're right, Giles," she said in an annoyed yet superior tone, "never let your guard down." She hopped up on the reading table, and sat twirling both weapons in her hands while Giles got his breath back.
"I say, that was good enough for today, Buffy." He glanced at the clock. "We've put long enough here. Why don't you go home and see your mother."
"How nice of you to suggest that," Buffy said sarcastically. She was kind of annoyed at Giles and his teaching style today. "I think I'll take you up on it."
She put the weapons down on the table, and picked up her backpack. "I could do with some quality Mom-time."
"She's not suspicious, is she?" Giles asked from behind the desk. "You know you can't tell her anything..."
"Secret identity... blah, blah, blah." Buffy rolled her eyes. "You've only told me a million times. But I think my mom would understand. I think it would be easier if she knew, because then I wouldn't have to fight curfews and all that to get to the evil."
"It's against the rules," Giles said severely. "You can NOT tell her anything, no matter how much you might want to."
"Jeez," Buffy muttered. "What is it with you and rules today? First you've gotta fight with sticks before you get to swords and then an interrogation on if I'm keeping my secret identity... Have I ever let you down yet, Giles? I think I'm keeping my end of this little bargain quite nicely, so you could give me just a bit of slack!"
Giles looked at her, a hint of contriteness on his face, but not much. "Go home and relax, Buffy. You deserve some time off. You're actually doing quite well, you know."
"Thank you!" Buffy said, still upset at him. "I'm glad you recognize that at least." She headed for the door and then turned back, an idea crossing her mind. "Are you worried about Sonya? Is that why you're being stuffier than usual today?"
"What nonsense are you talking about?" Giles asked. "I'm sure Sonya is fine."
"Whatever," Buffy replied, twirling back around and pushing the door open. She was even angrier now that her offer of bonding had been rebuffed. "Repress all you want. I'm going home."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The wind ruffled Sonya's shoulder-length, chestnut colored curls as she and Xander sped along the road in his jeep. She watched the scenery fly by with a calm detachment, not really paying attention to what passed by them as they drove. She knew that Xander wanted to talk to her about something. It was fairly obvious in the way that he kept glancing over at her, opening his mouth as if to speak and then snapping it closed and hastily turning his eyes back to the road. Sonya also had a pretty good idea of what he wanted to speak to her about. But she wasn't going to let him off easy by broaching the subject herself. If he wanted to tell her what was on his mind, he would just have to do it himself. Though with the way things were going, they'd probably be at the clinic already before he got up enough courage to actually say something. Sonya sighed. Patience had never been her strong suit.
"Sonya..." Xander began uncertainly, "Can we talk?"
(Finally,) Sonya thought. (I thought I would have to wait all day!) Aloud, she said, "Sure, what's on your mind, Harris?"
"Well..." he trailed off, biting his lower lip nervously. Sonya suppressed the urge to giggle. He looked like a little boy when he did that!
"Well..." she echoed him, a note of teasing in her voice.
"Uh, what I wanted to say was... that, erm..." he paused, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. "That I'm really sorry about this morning and I didn't mean to pressure you into this doctor thing," he mumbled in an almost incomprehensible rush of words. Sonya could barely make out what he said because it had been so soft and rushed. She rolled her eyes, marveling at how men could be such babies when it came to admitting that they were wrong. But she took it in stride, giving Xander a small smile. It was the thought that counted, she reminded herself. However, just because she appreciated his apology, didn't mean that she would let him off the hook so easily. She wanted to make him squirm a little bit first.
Pretending to examine her nails closely, she said brightly, "What was that, Xand? I don't think I heard what you said just now."
Xander scowled at her. "You know what I said, Parker."
She feigned innocence. "Really? I do?"
Xander turned the jeep into the clinic's parking lot and pulled up into a prime spot near the front. The handicapped stickers that Sonya had given him for his car after her accident definitely came in handy. Switching off the ignition, he turned toward her in his seat and replied, "I SAID that I was sorry, Sonya. I shouldn't have pressured you into coming here." Sighing, he added, "And if you want to leave now, we can. It's cool. I won't give you any grief over it." He looked down at his hands. "Besides, you shouldn't be doing this if it's just for my sake, or Giles' sake," he muttered. "That's not fair to you."
Sonya grinned and reached across the seat to grab his hand and give it a squeeze. "That means a lot to me, Xand. But the truth is, I'm not doing this for you or for Giles. I'm doing it for me." She smirked good-naturedly at his puzzled expression. "Yeah, I know, I put up a huge fight about it, but something Buffy told me made sense. I just can't NOT try, you know?"
Xander smiled a little. "Yeah, that's true." Opening the car door and moving around to get Sonya's wheelchair out of the back of the jeep, he said, "Well, we'd better get going. You don't want to be late."
"Leave it to your girlfriend to talk me into this insane venture," Sonya grumbled half-heartedly as he placed her in her wheelchair and pushed her toward the doors of the clinic.
Xander laughed. "Yeah, Buffy does have a way with words, doesn't she?"
"Well, I don't know if I'd go THAT far..." Sonya protested.
Xander rolled his eyes and replied in his best stuffy, Giles impersonation, "You, my dear, are incorrigible!"
Sonya smiled. "And you wouldn't have it any other way, Harris."
#2: In the Space of Desire
Authors: Sonya and Erin
E-mail: sonyajeb@swbell.net OR carynsilver@yahoo.com
Rating: PG-13
Category: B/X, O/Other, AU, action/adventure, romance
Summary: This is a sequel to our epic saga "In the Space of a Heartbeat," which is a story about what would happen if Buffy had never gotten the Slayer powers.
Disclaimer: We do not own Buffy or any of the original characters or ideas from the show. They all belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc. All we own is our own creative genius (unless that's too strong a word :) and any characters we make up.
Distribution: Regulars... SURE!!! Newbies... ask and you shall recieve!
Feedback: Love it! We want to know your likes AND dislikes. Flames are the only thing we do not accept.
Spoilers: None much for the shows, but heavy spoilers for the earlier installments of this fanfic series!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Chapter Four
Sunnydale High
Buffy and Xander had almost made it to the library when a lone figure turned the corner and came into view. It was a girl with longish blonde hair and a distinctive face. She walked with purpose. When Buffy looked at her, she thought that the girl looked like Buffy felt after getting her Slayer powers -- confident for the world to see. Buffy wondered if such confidence only came in formerly shy people -- Buffy had become extremely introverted after her accident, and was only now becoming more assertive again -- but then the Slayer pushed those thoughts away. While she had been drifting, Xander had yelled out a greeting to the new girl.
"Amy Madison! Long time no see! Where've you been hiding?" With a flash of a smile to Buffy, Xander dropped her hand and hugged the new girl.
The girl hugged him back. "I was living abroad with my dad. After everything that happened with my mom, and then at Halloween, Dad decided I needed some time away from this place."
"Well, wherever you were, it certainly agreed with you," Xander said, stepping back to look at her.
Amy preened under his scrutiny. Buffy was slightly jealous of the girl's cute outfit -- the green and blue tones really brought out her hair and fair complexion.
"We were all over the place. I got to see all of Europe, and I kept up with school through correspondence courses. Snyder didn't want to go with it, but Dad promised that his company would donate money to help the building fund so Snyder basically had no choice but to agree. The Mayor would have had his head if he hadn't."
"And now you're back."
"Yep, now I'm back. And better than before."
"I'm glad," Xander said with sincerity. "When you disappeared so soon after Halloween, I was a little worried about you."
Buffy took that instant to clear her throat. She stepped closer to Xander and slid a hand through his arm in what she knew was a possessive gesture.
Xander smiled and introduced her. "Amy, this is my girlfriend Buffy Summers. She moved to Sunnydale about a month ago."
Amy's smile seemed genuinely delighted. "I'm so glad to meet you, Buffy!" she said enthusiastically, pumping Buffy's proffered hand. "Xander... well, to put it bluntly, he saved my life. And it looks like you're making him happy. That is so great."
Her words made Buffy feel better and her jealousy mostly abated. "Thanks, Amy. It's nice to meet you, too." She glanced at Xander. "How did you save her life?"
"Spike kidnapped her. He wanted to use her as a vessel to bring back Drusilla, but a chaos demon got released instead. I had to blow up Snyder's car to stop it. It was a whole big thing." Xander looked a bit embarrassed.
Amy jumped in with, "It was the worst Halloween of my life!"
"Oh!" Understanding lit Buffy's gaze. "The Halloween Incident. Oz mentioned the rumors, but I never heard the whole story."
"Well," Amy said, "it's been really great to see you guys, but I've got to go to the office. I have an appointment with Snyder before I can start classes tomorrow. But I hope I'll see you both then..."
"Yeah," Buffy said. "I'll look for you."
"Great!" Amy replied. "See you later. It was great to meet you, Buffy." With a wave, the new girl was gone, and Buffy and Xander were alone in front of the library doors.
"I'm really glad she's OK," Xander said softly to Buffy. "She vanished after the Halloween thing, and I was worried she'd had a break down or something. She's had a pretty tough life. Her mom was a psycho-witch and tried to possess Amy's body or something. Giles told me about it once."
"Poor girl," Buffy said, looking down the hall after Amy. "We'll have to invite her to go out with us sometime. Maybe I'll get Oz to go, too."
"Are you trying to play matchmaker?" Xander accused.
Buffy smiled. "Guilty as charged. It's just, Oz has been such a good friend to me, and Amy seems like a really nice person. I had thought Oz and Sonya might hit it off. I even let it slip to him that she might need a ride to school today so they could be alone for awhile, but it doesn't look like anything is happening there." She paused, and then added, "Besides, for a minute there you and Amy were pretty chummy. If she dates Oz then I don't have to worry about that."
"You were jealous?" Xander asked. "Over me?"
"Well... yeah... a little." Buffy looked down at the ground, embarrassed.
"That's so sweet!" Xander swooped down and kissed her on the mouth. Buffy happily returned the kiss for a minute, and then they broke apart.
"I'm glad you weren't mad," Buffy said. "I was afraid you'd think I didn't trust you, and it's not that at all. I know you'd never stray."
"Stray... from the best thing that's ever happened to me? Never!" Xander vowed. "And actually, I'm more flattered than anything by the jealousy thing. I mean, we all have those weird feelings occasionally. It's normal. And they usually don't mean anything."
"Right," Buffy agreed. "Well, I guess we should go in."
Xander nodded. "Yep. But not before I get one more kiss." Buffy eagerly gave him what he asked for, and then they composed themselves and went inside the library.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"You're late," Sonya accused when they stepped inside.
"I know, I'm sorry," Xander said.
"We were... um... busy talking," Buffy added.
"Talking. Yeah, right." Sonya rolled her eyes and sarcasm dripped off her tongue.
"We were talking," Xander protested, "to Amy Madison. She's back."
"Great," Sonya said, "now that your little reunion is over, can we go? I'd like to get this done with, and we're going to be late as it is."
Xander looked at his watch. "No, we've still got enough time. The office is close."
"Whatever." Sonya wheeled herself out toward the parking lot, leaving Xander no choice but to follow. He gave Buffy a kiss on the cheek and jogged after Sonya.
Buffy watched them go, and when they were gone she looked over at Giles who stood by the circulation desk. "I hope everything goes all right."
"As do I," Giles said, staring after them as well. "As do I."
She detected a gleam of caring in his eyes as he looked after Sonya. Buffy knew that Giles cared a lot about Sonya. He'd turned his life inside out for her, and he was always so solicitous of her -- at least as solicitous as an Englishman could be. Buffy sighed. What did it matter? He was her Watcher, not her father. Her father was off gallivanting around the country with his new girlfriend Silvie -- a girl half his age. These thoughts were getting her nowhere!
"Giles, what are we doing today?"
The librarian seemed to come back into the moment with difficulty, and Buffy wondered where his thoughts had been.
"Ah, yes, training."
"Yes," Buffy repeated. "Training. That little thing we do every day to get me ready to face the minions of darkness every night. What are we doing today?"
Giles walked over to the weapons locker, removing his jacket on the way. He pulled two long, wooden staffs out and tossed one to Buffy.
"Stick fighting?" Buffy asked, catching it deftly and looking at it with a confused expression. "This would do me better cut up into a dozen stakes."
"Staff fighting," Giles corrected her in a long-suffering tone. "And it's very important. It's the first step toward learning many other types of fighting, such a sword play."
A smile lit Buffy's face. "Ooh -- swords. I want one."
"Not 'til you learn the basics of staff fighting." He lunged in and rapped her smartly on the shoulder.
"Ow!" Buffy cried. "No fair! You didn't say ready, set, go!"
Giles gave her one of his patented "looks" and then said, "Ready, set, go." He lunged in again, and this time Buffy was able to use her staff to block his strike.
"Now, Buffy," Giles said as they circled each other with the staffs, trading and evading blows, "you've got to be prepared at all times. Vampires and other forces of darkness won't give you a warning..." He jumped back as she darted in to hit him on the shoulder. He made it just in time. "Good shot."
"Thank you." Buffy accepted his praise in what she thought was a gracious manner. "I don't know why you're making such a big deal about this staff fighting. It's pretty easy. The cross bow was harder, and I picked that up on the first shot."
"Your powers lend themselves to the fighting arts," Giles said, trying to disguise his breathlessness as he dodged several of her attempted blows. "... but that doesn't mean you can just cavalierly skip any step you want to. It's a process... urg!" He grunted and doubled over a little when one of Buffy's raps hit home into his stomach.
Buffy paused at the pained look on his face. She stepped forward to help him. "Are you, OK, Giles?"
Giles waited until she was close enough to touch him before bringing his staff up behind her to trip her. The staff did it's work and knocked her off balance. "Aha! You see, never let your guard down... oof!" Buffy turned her fall into a flip and pulled his staff out of his hands with her feet. Then, grabbing the other staff with her hands, she flipped back up to her feet and rapped Giles smartly on the side.
"You're right, Giles," she said in an annoyed yet superior tone, "never let your guard down." She hopped up on the reading table, and sat twirling both weapons in her hands while Giles got his breath back.
"I say, that was good enough for today, Buffy." He glanced at the clock. "We've put long enough here. Why don't you go home and see your mother."
"How nice of you to suggest that," Buffy said sarcastically. She was kind of annoyed at Giles and his teaching style today. "I think I'll take you up on it."
She put the weapons down on the table, and picked up her backpack. "I could do with some quality Mom-time."
"She's not suspicious, is she?" Giles asked from behind the desk. "You know you can't tell her anything..."
"Secret identity... blah, blah, blah." Buffy rolled her eyes. "You've only told me a million times. But I think my mom would understand. I think it would be easier if she knew, because then I wouldn't have to fight curfews and all that to get to the evil."
"It's against the rules," Giles said severely. "You can NOT tell her anything, no matter how much you might want to."
"Jeez," Buffy muttered. "What is it with you and rules today? First you've gotta fight with sticks before you get to swords and then an interrogation on if I'm keeping my secret identity... Have I ever let you down yet, Giles? I think I'm keeping my end of this little bargain quite nicely, so you could give me just a bit of slack!"
Giles looked at her, a hint of contriteness on his face, but not much. "Go home and relax, Buffy. You deserve some time off. You're actually doing quite well, you know."
"Thank you!" Buffy said, still upset at him. "I'm glad you recognize that at least." She headed for the door and then turned back, an idea crossing her mind. "Are you worried about Sonya? Is that why you're being stuffier than usual today?"
"What nonsense are you talking about?" Giles asked. "I'm sure Sonya is fine."
"Whatever," Buffy replied, twirling back around and pushing the door open. She was even angrier now that her offer of bonding had been rebuffed. "Repress all you want. I'm going home."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The wind ruffled Sonya's shoulder-length, chestnut colored curls as she and Xander sped along the road in his jeep. She watched the scenery fly by with a calm detachment, not really paying attention to what passed by them as they drove. She knew that Xander wanted to talk to her about something. It was fairly obvious in the way that he kept glancing over at her, opening his mouth as if to speak and then snapping it closed and hastily turning his eyes back to the road. Sonya also had a pretty good idea of what he wanted to speak to her about. But she wasn't going to let him off easy by broaching the subject herself. If he wanted to tell her what was on his mind, he would just have to do it himself. Though with the way things were going, they'd probably be at the clinic already before he got up enough courage to actually say something. Sonya sighed. Patience had never been her strong suit.
"Sonya..." Xander began uncertainly, "Can we talk?"
(Finally,) Sonya thought. (I thought I would have to wait all day!) Aloud, she said, "Sure, what's on your mind, Harris?"
"Well..." he trailed off, biting his lower lip nervously. Sonya suppressed the urge to giggle. He looked like a little boy when he did that!
"Well..." she echoed him, a note of teasing in her voice.
"Uh, what I wanted to say was... that, erm..." he paused, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. "That I'm really sorry about this morning and I didn't mean to pressure you into this doctor thing," he mumbled in an almost incomprehensible rush of words. Sonya could barely make out what he said because it had been so soft and rushed. She rolled her eyes, marveling at how men could be such babies when it came to admitting that they were wrong. But she took it in stride, giving Xander a small smile. It was the thought that counted, she reminded herself. However, just because she appreciated his apology, didn't mean that she would let him off the hook so easily. She wanted to make him squirm a little bit first.
Pretending to examine her nails closely, she said brightly, "What was that, Xand? I don't think I heard what you said just now."
Xander scowled at her. "You know what I said, Parker."
She feigned innocence. "Really? I do?"
Xander turned the jeep into the clinic's parking lot and pulled up into a prime spot near the front. The handicapped stickers that Sonya had given him for his car after her accident definitely came in handy. Switching off the ignition, he turned toward her in his seat and replied, "I SAID that I was sorry, Sonya. I shouldn't have pressured you into coming here." Sighing, he added, "And if you want to leave now, we can. It's cool. I won't give you any grief over it." He looked down at his hands. "Besides, you shouldn't be doing this if it's just for my sake, or Giles' sake," he muttered. "That's not fair to you."
Sonya grinned and reached across the seat to grab his hand and give it a squeeze. "That means a lot to me, Xand. But the truth is, I'm not doing this for you or for Giles. I'm doing it for me." She smirked good-naturedly at his puzzled expression. "Yeah, I know, I put up a huge fight about it, but something Buffy told me made sense. I just can't NOT try, you know?"
Xander smiled a little. "Yeah, that's true." Opening the car door and moving around to get Sonya's wheelchair out of the back of the jeep, he said, "Well, we'd better get going. You don't want to be late."
"Leave it to your girlfriend to talk me into this insane venture," Sonya grumbled half-heartedly as he placed her in her wheelchair and pushed her toward the doors of the clinic.
Xander laughed. "Yeah, Buffy does have a way with words, doesn't she?"
"Well, I don't know if I'd go THAT far..." Sonya protested.
Xander rolled his eyes and replied in his best stuffy, Giles impersonation, "You, my dear, are incorrigible!"
Sonya smiled. "And you wouldn't have it any other way, Harris."