"The Old Maid"—Valancy's Song
("The Boxer")

I was just an old maid,
So my story's seldom told;
I had squandered my resistance
And listened to the jokes
That Uncle Ben told.
Then Doc's test—
I decided to live my own life
And disregard the rest.
When I left my home
And my family
I was already twenty-nine
I went to Roaring Abel's,
Nursing Cissy Gay until she died.
Then, oh no!
I'd not seek out my old quarters
Where my aunt and mother sew.
I was looking for my Blue Castle
Where I knew I could go.

CHORUS
Lie-la-lie.....

Asking only for a marriage
I approached Barney Snaith
And I got my answer—
Not just a husband but an island in Mistawis.
I do declare,
That ofttimes I was so happy
It was more than I could bear.

CHORUS
Lie-la-lie.....

Then I'm cleaning up our cabin
For I know I must be gone
Going home
Where I'll live out all my days
In perfect health, you see.
He'll hate me,
I'm going home.

But at my door stands Barney—
(He's a writer by his trade)
And he begs me to come back home.
He carries the reminders
Of all the friends who mocked at him
And yet he cries out in his anger and his pain,
"You're like a jewel in my heart!"
So I cannot remain.

CHORUS
Lie-la-lie.....