Destiny Lost
#2: In the Space of Desire
Authors: Sonya and Erin
E-mail: sonyajeb@swbell.net OR carynsilver@yahoo.com
Rating: PG-13
Category: B/X, O/Other, AU, action/adventure, romance
Summary: This is a sequel to our epic saga "In the Space of a Heartbeat," which is a story about what would happen if Buffy had never gotten the Slayer powers.
Disclaimer: We do not own Buffy or any of the original characters or ideas from the show. They all belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc. All we own is our own creative genius (unless that's too strong a word :) and any characters we make up.
Distribution: Regulars... SURE!!! Newbies... ask and you shall recieve!
Feedback: Love it! We want to know your likes AND dislikes. Flames are the only thing we do not accept.
Spoilers: None much for the shows, but heavy spoilers for the earlier installments of this fanfic series!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Chapter Nine
Summers' Residence
Joyce sat by her daughter's bed all night, pushing herself gently back and forth in the big, old rocking chair. It felt like old times. Joyce had taken this chair to the hospital during all Buffy's lengthy stays. When dawn broke, Buffy finally moaned. Joyce sat forward, blinking her tiredness away.
"Buffy, honey?"
"How could..." Buffy muttered, followed by a few things Joyce couldn't distinguish. Though Buffy was still asleep, tears were flowing down her cheeks. Her eyes moved back and forth with a rapidity that denoted dreaming. Joyce touched Buffy's cheek. It was warm, too warm.
"That's it," Joyce said decisively. "You are not going to school today. I'm going to go call them right now so they get the message first thing." Joyce hurried out of the room, a woman with a mission. She wondered how long she should wait before calling that nice girl Amy to get Buffy's assignments.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Buffy was standing in the dark. She could feel a breeze on her skin and grass under her bare toes, but she couldn't see anything. Buffy whimpered. She knew something was seriously wrong. She hurt -- not pain from a physical wound, but it hurt just as bad.
"Xander," she whispered.
A bright, white light flared before her, and suddenly Xander was there. She stepped toward him, but he floated back, just out of reach.
"Where are you going?" she called desperately. "Wait!"
But he floated away faster.
"Help me, Buffy! Help me!"
His voice drifted back to her on the wind, and then he was gone.
The darkness around Buffy dissolved into a freaky, dim, red light. She looked around and found herself standing in the old factory that had once been Spike and Willow's lair. Buffy slowly walked forward and came up to the table where she had been strapped down and held prisoner by a sorcerer assassin from the Order of Taraka.
A thin, pale face with cruel dark eyes topped by a shock of hair black as night floated in the air for a second.
"You're too late, Buffy."
"Too late for what?" she called, but the face vanished.
"I will get the power..." The words echoed and the room began to spin. Buffy grabbed the table that had once been her prison and tried to hold on.
She saw several brief images, mostly faces -- Amy, her mother, Angel, Sonya, Giles, Oz. Then there was Xander again, his face twisted in a rage that made him look feral. Then the silhouettes of a group of women bent over a candle. Words from a language she did not know assailed her ears, making her more dizzy. Buffy was only grateful that the words drowned out the echoes of the other voice -- the voice that ran chills up and down her spine. Then she closed her eyes and hung onto the table for dear life.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sonya was running, trying to escape the darkness that threatened to overwhelm her. As she ran, her breath taking an almost tangible form in the cold night air around her, she felt the shadows reaching out with clawed hands to capture her.
Her side began to hurt and she had to slow down a little. She squinted. The darkness was beginning to lighten -- to red. That spurred her forward again.
Suddenly she could see images in the light, and the farther she went, the worse the images got: Giles looking at her with a disapproving, hateful glare; Buffy laying in a crumpled heap, moaning painfully; a thin, pale face with cruel dark eyes topped by a shock of hair black as night. Sonya wracked her brain, but couldn't recall ever seeing that face before in her life. Then the face, it was definitely male, began to laugh at her, causing icy fingers of dread to run up and down her spine. Turning away from him, she suddenly saw something that made her blood run cold. It was Xander, laying in a darkened room with a pool of blood forming near his head. His clothes were torn and his left arm was bent at an odd angle. He wasn't moving.
"Xander!" she called shrilly, trying to go to his side. But she couldn't seem to move. It was like her feet were stuck to the floor.
Then, as suddenly as the terrible images had appeared, they were gone and Sonya was bathed in an eerie, white light. She saw the silhouettes of a group of women bent over a candle. Words from a language she did not know assailed her ears, confusing her.
"Stop it!" she cried, holding her hands over her ears. "Leave me alone!" She sank down to the ground, tears coursing down her cheeks. "Leave me alone," she whispered, brokenly. "Just leave me alone."
A pair of hands grabbed her shoulders, pulling her to her feet roughly. Sonya looked up, startled out of her daze, and saw Oz looking at her with an intense expression on his face. "Oz," she murmured, clutching at his arms like a drowning person would clutch at a life preserver. "Help me... make it stop..."
He didn't say a word to her, only leaned in and kissed her. Compared to some of the things she'd done with Xander lately, this kiss was almost chaste, but it still jolted her to her very core, awakening feelings in her that she'd never even realized she could have.
He pulled away from her and said simply, "Deplore thy concupiscences, Sonya." Then he was gone, leaving her alone in her nightmare.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
When Buffy opened her eyes, her stomach was churning. She could taste bile in the back of her throat.
"Oh, honey," Joyce said from the rocking chair, "you look positively green..." Then her mother's eyes widened and she lunged for the nearby trashcan, getting it to the side of the bed just in time as all the food Buffy had eaten in the past few hours spewed into the small, pink receptacle.
When she was spent, Buffy sank back among her pillows. A sheen of sweat covered her face and she felt a little dizzy.
"Mommy," she mumbled in a small voice, "I don' feel good."
"You aren't going to school today," Joyce said in a firm tone. "I've already called in and told them."
"Gotta go," Buffy protested weakly. "See Giles..."
Joyce put a cool hand on Buffy's hot forehead. "No, you're running a fever. Don't worry about tutoring. Your friend Amy is bringing your assignments." Joyce stood up. "Now I'm going to go get you some juice. You need to get fluids in you, and if you can't keep anything down, we're going to the doctor."
As her mother bustled out, Buffy sank down lower into the bed. Her knee twinged and hazy memories from the night before began to come back, and with them came the tears.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sonya woke up from her nightmare with a start. Her heart was beating fast, and her legs were burning. Sonya moaned, and then stopped abruptly. Her legs were burning! She could feel her legs!
Pushing the lingering images of her dream to a far corner of her mind to be analyzed later, she sat up and threw the covers off. Her legs actually looked a little pinker, but Sonya didn't know if that was real or just an illusion. She popped her morning pill from the bottle sitting on her night stand, and then sucked in a breath.
"Well, girl," Sonya told herself, "if you're gonna do it, do it now."
She slowly turned herself, positioning her legs so they dangled off the side of the bed. With one more deep breath, she set them flat on the floor. She could actually feel the carpet with her toes! Now came the test... Sonya slid her body off of the bed, and her legs supported her weight. She wobbled back and forth for a minute, and then found her balance.
"Giles!" Sonya screamed. "Giles, get in here!"
There was the sound of thumping footsteps and then Giles burst into the room. "What is it? What's wrong..." His voice trailed off into amazed silence as he took in the tableau before him.
"The treatment," he managed, "it's working..."
Sonya nodded. Then she tried to take a step... and tumbled to the ground. Giles swooped down to pick her up and set her in her chair.
"It's all right," he murmured consolingly. "Don't worry about that -- instead, concentrate on the fact that you stood!"
He put his hands on her shoulders, and she felt her anger and fear of falling fade away. Giles was right. The standing and the feeling was the important thing. Sonya couldn't wait to see Dr. Keller that afternoon and tell him the great news.
Giles leaned down and gave her a hug. "You're so strong that you amaze me sometimes," he said. Then, as if embarrassed to have shown so much emotion, he hurried out of the room to fix the two of them breakfast.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
During lunch, Amy sat at the table where she, Buffy and Oz had sat the day before. She had a turkey sandwich and an apple in front of her, but she wasn't eating. The scene outside the window was making her ill.
Sonya and Xander were playing kissy-face on the front lawn under the trees. Amy thought back to Joyce's call that morning, and she wondered how Xander could live with himself. Amy had no doubts that it was this Sonya thing that had made Buffy sick.
"Hey." Oz slumped into his usual seat.
"Hey," Amy replied with a sigh. "Sickening, isn't it?"
"Worse." Oz turned away from the window. "Where's Buffy?"
"She's really sick. Her mom said she's puking and running a fever."
"This just keeps getting better and better."
"Do you think there's anything we can do about it?" Amy asked. Then she looked at Oz -- really looked at him. There was something in his eyes... something that made Amy wonder what was really going on inside that head of his.
"We could kill Xander," Oz replied in a dead-pan tone.
Amy glanced sharply at him. His expression revealed nothing. "Anything besides homicide?" she tried again.
Oz shrugged. Then he stood.
"Are you all right?" Amy put a hand out to stop him from leaving.
"Fine." He shook her hand off and walked away. Amy watched him go, a worry frown crinkling her forehead.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"I'll be right back, OK, babe?" Xander asked with an endearing lopsided smile that made Sonya forgive him this new tendency to call her "babe."
"All right," she said with a smile. She watched him run into the school building with pride and pleasure. He was hers now... A footstep crunching the grass made her look to the side, and there stood Oz, looking at her with inscrutable eyes.
"What do you want?" she demanded, extremely embarrassed to feel a slight flush creeping onto her cheeks. The images of her nightmare came back to haunt her and she could actually feel Oz's lips on hers as if it had been real and not just a dream.
"Buffy's sick," Oz replied. "Buffy's never sick."
"So," Sonya muttered defensively. "What does that have to do with me?" But inside she started to feel a little twinge of worry. Slayers rarely got sick.
Oz squatted down so they were on eye-level. "It's got everything to do with you. Don't you see how things are spiraling out of control?"
"You're not going in for the 'Xander's demon possessed' theory, are you?" Sonya demanded in a biting tone, trying to keep from crying. "Angel tried that one out on me last night. As if the only way someone could love me is not of their own free will."
"I don't know if what's going on is real, or if there's something supernatural involved, but I don't like what it's doing to you, and to everyone else." Oz reached over and took her hand in his own, seldom-seen passion coloring his voice ever so slightly. "There were people who loved you before. You have a good and beautiful soul, Sonya. I noticed that the first day I saw you. But now something's clouding it. Let me help you."
After that speech -- the longest she'd ever heard pass his lips -- Sonya sat back, thoughts swirling through her brain. She examined some of the guilt that she'd been holding in check, and it shamed her -- what she'd done to Buffy especially. Sonya was not going to just give Xander back to Buffy. What good would that do? Xander had made his decision. But Buffy did deserve something better... She looked up at Oz and smiled a little, feeling a rush of trust and compassion for this reticent young man.
"Oz, what do you think I should do?"
Then Oz was roughly pulled backwards and thrown onto the ground.
"Get your measly paws off of my woman!" Xander yelled.
Oz sprang to his feet, and before Xander could do anything, Oz landed a punch to his midsection. Xander doubled over in pain, but quickly recovered to throw himself onto Oz. The two boys hit the ground rolling and fighting.
"Xander, stop it!" Sonya cried, watching helplessly. If she was still the Slayer she could have stopped this, but she wasn't...
With a sudden surge of strength Oz pushed Xander off of him and stood up, panting. Xander stood up too.
"It's not worth it," Oz said. His hooded gaze went from Xander, to Sonya, back to Xander. "I give up." Then he turned on his heel and walked off. Sonya watched him go, and saw Amy run up to him. Sonya frowned, feeling her gut twist painfully at the thought of something going on between Oz and the blonde, but then Xander took her attention.
"What were you doing holding his hand?" Xander demanded angrily.
"I wasn't holding his hand," Sonya protested. "He grabbed my hand. Do you really think I'd cheat on you, Xander, after everything I've gone through to get you in my life?" She paused, seeming to consider her words carefully. "I love you, Xander."
The expression on his face softened and he leaned in to give her a small kiss. "You're right, Sonya. I'm sorry."
Sonya held him tight in a long hug until the pressure of his arms around her drove the worries out of her head. But this time that tactic didn't work as well as it usually did...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
At her doctor's appointment that day, Sonya didn't even have to wait. Nurse Jane ushered her straight back to the examination room. A few second later Dr. Keller came through the door with all his girth in tow.
"How's my favorite patient?" he said, grinning from ear to ear.
"I'm OK, Dr. Keller," Sonya replied.
"Is something bothering you? You seem a bit perturbed." The doctor looked at her with concern.
Sonya shook her head quickly. She was not going to bore the doctor with the trials and tribulations of her rapidly evolving social life. But she did have good news to share.
"Not perturbed, more like ecstatic!" Then she filled him in on the toe wiggling and standing of the previous night and morning.
"Wonderful!" Dr. Keller boomed. "You're progressing so much more quickly than I had hoped. You've already moved leaps and bounds... er... to coin a phrase... beyond my other patients."
Sonya smiled, but didn't say anything. She attributed it to her Slayer genes. No more super-healing for her, but perhaps still a little more than normal people?
"After today's treatment, you may actually be able to walk out of here."
"You're kidding?" Sonya looked at him with wide eyes. She'd only dared think of this in her most secret dreams.
Dr. Keller shook his head. "No, no I'm not."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
After her treatment, Sonya sat up, and under Dr. Keller's guidance, she slowly slipped off the large, metal table. Dr. Keller took her arm and steadied her until she found her balance. Then he moved a few feet away.
"Walk to me," he ordered.
Suddenly, Sonya panicked. "What if I can't?" Crossing this boundary was scary. If it failed, she didn't know if she could pick up the pieces.
Dr. Keller's smiling face got suddenly cold. "Do it, Sonya. Do it now."
That was just the prodding she needed. She took a step. Then another, then another. When she reached the doctor on the other side of the room she cried, "I'm doing it!" She stopped talking to savor the experience. She was stepping forward on her own two feet, not dependent on a chair for movement. She could feel the cold tile under her bare feet and the air conditioning cooled her bare legs underneath her robe.
The doctor let her alone so she could change back into her street clothes, then he walked her -- albeit just a touch slowly -- out to the waiting room where Xander was slouched in a green chair. When he saw her standing there, Xander leapt from his chair and ran over to hug her tightly.
"I can't believe it! This is wonderful!" he yelled, causing Nurse Jane to make a shushing noise from behind her counter.
"I couldn't have done it without Dr. Keller," Sonya said, ready to finally introduce her boyfriend to the man who'd saved her life. They looked up to find Dr. Keller had gone.
"Oh well, I'll meet him next time," Xander said, kissing her on the cheek. "You have two more treatments, right?"
"Yeah." Sonya nodded, and together they started the long, slow walk to the parking lot. At the main door to the office, she turned and looked back down the long hall. (Where did he get off to so fast?)
"What's wrong, babe?" Xander asked, looking down at her with a quizzical expression. Then he leaned in and nibbled her ear lobe.
"Xander!" Sonya cried, pushing him off. "This isn't the place." But he'd succeeded in his mission to distract her.
"Where to now, milady?" Xander asked, helping her into the jeep with a flourish.
"The library," Sonya said decisively. "Giles has got to see this."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Amy stared up at Giles with a worried expression on her face as she finished updating him on Buffy's condition. The librarian seemed to be barely paying attention. And from what Oz had told her about the situation, Giles was supposed to be caring about this -- wasn't a Watcher some kind of mentor/father figure?
"...so her fever finally broke, but she's still not feeling well..." Amy paused and glanced at Oz standing next to her. He met her eyes and shrugged in agreement. Amy looked back at Giles. "And so Buffy permed her hair, bought a bunch of spandex and joined a cult that worships the almighty lima bean while listening to Madonna 24/7."
"I say, that's..." Giles paused with a furrowed brow. "What was that again, Miss Madison?"
"Just checking to make sure you were still with us," Amy said.
"Sorry," Giles replied, "it's just that I'm waiting for... nevermind. What were you saying about Miss Summers?"
"She asked us to come see if you had any messages for her, or any advice," Amy repeated in a firm tone.
"Buffy doesn't get sick," Oz interjected. "It's weird."
"True, true," Giles replied distractedly. His eyes kept darting to the door. "But perhaps it is just a normal flu. That has been known to happen."
Amy and Oz both frowned.
Suddenly, the outer doors to the library came open with a crash. Giles looked up with anticipation. Xander came running in. He skidded to a stop and held the door open.
"Dum, da, da, dum..." he said in ringing tones. "Lady and gentlemen, I am proud to introduce the new and improved, Miss Sonya Parker!"
Amy felt a rustling beside her. Oz had stepped forward and was staring at the door.
After a dramatic pause, Xander looked outside and said, "Hey, that's your cue."
"Xander!" Sonya's voice drifted in from outside. "Melodramatic, much? You didn't have to do that."
Then the girl came into view. She casually strolled into the library on her own two feet, wheelchair nowhere in evidence. Amy's mouth dropped open in shock.
Giles ran out from behind the circulation desk and gave Sonya a big hug. "I can't believe it. I'm so happy for you, my dear!"
Sonya hugged him back, a slight frown on her face. "Yeah, Giles... uh... thanks."
Her eyes met Oz's over Giles shoulder. Amy could practically feel the unspoken tension between the two of them.
"Oz..." Sonya said. Xander glanced between the two of them and scowled, but this time he didn't say anything.
"I'm glad you got what you wanted, Sonya," Oz said, his face unreadable. Then he turned and walked out of the library.
Amy watched him go, and then looked back toward the others. "Mr. Giles!" she cried. "Don't you even care about this Buffy thing?"
The faces of the three by the door turned to Amy with varying expressions. Xander seemed annoyed. "Why are we talking about her again?"
Giles was indifferent. "She'll be fine. Don't worry, Miss Madison."
Sonya was the only one to display any amount of concern over Buffy's welfare. She disentangled herself from Giles' grasp and walked slowly over to Amy. "What's wrong with Buffy? Is there anything I can do?"
Amy glared at the other girl. "Yeah, Sonya, you can just leave her alone!" Then, completely disgusted by this whole turn of events, Amy turned and walked to the doors through which Oz had disappeared. "Haven't you already done enough?" she called back over her shoulder. Then she left, the doors swinging shut silently behind her.
#2: In the Space of Desire
Authors: Sonya and Erin
E-mail: sonyajeb@swbell.net OR carynsilver@yahoo.com
Rating: PG-13
Category: B/X, O/Other, AU, action/adventure, romance
Summary: This is a sequel to our epic saga "In the Space of a Heartbeat," which is a story about what would happen if Buffy had never gotten the Slayer powers.
Disclaimer: We do not own Buffy or any of the original characters or ideas from the show. They all belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc. All we own is our own creative genius (unless that's too strong a word :) and any characters we make up.
Distribution: Regulars... SURE!!! Newbies... ask and you shall recieve!
Feedback: Love it! We want to know your likes AND dislikes. Flames are the only thing we do not accept.
Spoilers: None much for the shows, but heavy spoilers for the earlier installments of this fanfic series!
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Chapter Nine
Summers' Residence
Joyce sat by her daughter's bed all night, pushing herself gently back and forth in the big, old rocking chair. It felt like old times. Joyce had taken this chair to the hospital during all Buffy's lengthy stays. When dawn broke, Buffy finally moaned. Joyce sat forward, blinking her tiredness away.
"Buffy, honey?"
"How could..." Buffy muttered, followed by a few things Joyce couldn't distinguish. Though Buffy was still asleep, tears were flowing down her cheeks. Her eyes moved back and forth with a rapidity that denoted dreaming. Joyce touched Buffy's cheek. It was warm, too warm.
"That's it," Joyce said decisively. "You are not going to school today. I'm going to go call them right now so they get the message first thing." Joyce hurried out of the room, a woman with a mission. She wondered how long she should wait before calling that nice girl Amy to get Buffy's assignments.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Buffy was standing in the dark. She could feel a breeze on her skin and grass under her bare toes, but she couldn't see anything. Buffy whimpered. She knew something was seriously wrong. She hurt -- not pain from a physical wound, but it hurt just as bad.
"Xander," she whispered.
A bright, white light flared before her, and suddenly Xander was there. She stepped toward him, but he floated back, just out of reach.
"Where are you going?" she called desperately. "Wait!"
But he floated away faster.
"Help me, Buffy! Help me!"
His voice drifted back to her on the wind, and then he was gone.
The darkness around Buffy dissolved into a freaky, dim, red light. She looked around and found herself standing in the old factory that had once been Spike and Willow's lair. Buffy slowly walked forward and came up to the table where she had been strapped down and held prisoner by a sorcerer assassin from the Order of Taraka.
A thin, pale face with cruel dark eyes topped by a shock of hair black as night floated in the air for a second.
"You're too late, Buffy."
"Too late for what?" she called, but the face vanished.
"I will get the power..." The words echoed and the room began to spin. Buffy grabbed the table that had once been her prison and tried to hold on.
She saw several brief images, mostly faces -- Amy, her mother, Angel, Sonya, Giles, Oz. Then there was Xander again, his face twisted in a rage that made him look feral. Then the silhouettes of a group of women bent over a candle. Words from a language she did not know assailed her ears, making her more dizzy. Buffy was only grateful that the words drowned out the echoes of the other voice -- the voice that ran chills up and down her spine. Then she closed her eyes and hung onto the table for dear life.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sonya was running, trying to escape the darkness that threatened to overwhelm her. As she ran, her breath taking an almost tangible form in the cold night air around her, she felt the shadows reaching out with clawed hands to capture her.
Her side began to hurt and she had to slow down a little. She squinted. The darkness was beginning to lighten -- to red. That spurred her forward again.
Suddenly she could see images in the light, and the farther she went, the worse the images got: Giles looking at her with a disapproving, hateful glare; Buffy laying in a crumpled heap, moaning painfully; a thin, pale face with cruel dark eyes topped by a shock of hair black as night. Sonya wracked her brain, but couldn't recall ever seeing that face before in her life. Then the face, it was definitely male, began to laugh at her, causing icy fingers of dread to run up and down her spine. Turning away from him, she suddenly saw something that made her blood run cold. It was Xander, laying in a darkened room with a pool of blood forming near his head. His clothes were torn and his left arm was bent at an odd angle. He wasn't moving.
"Xander!" she called shrilly, trying to go to his side. But she couldn't seem to move. It was like her feet were stuck to the floor.
Then, as suddenly as the terrible images had appeared, they were gone and Sonya was bathed in an eerie, white light. She saw the silhouettes of a group of women bent over a candle. Words from a language she did not know assailed her ears, confusing her.
"Stop it!" she cried, holding her hands over her ears. "Leave me alone!" She sank down to the ground, tears coursing down her cheeks. "Leave me alone," she whispered, brokenly. "Just leave me alone."
A pair of hands grabbed her shoulders, pulling her to her feet roughly. Sonya looked up, startled out of her daze, and saw Oz looking at her with an intense expression on his face. "Oz," she murmured, clutching at his arms like a drowning person would clutch at a life preserver. "Help me... make it stop..."
He didn't say a word to her, only leaned in and kissed her. Compared to some of the things she'd done with Xander lately, this kiss was almost chaste, but it still jolted her to her very core, awakening feelings in her that she'd never even realized she could have.
He pulled away from her and said simply, "Deplore thy concupiscences, Sonya." Then he was gone, leaving her alone in her nightmare.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
When Buffy opened her eyes, her stomach was churning. She could taste bile in the back of her throat.
"Oh, honey," Joyce said from the rocking chair, "you look positively green..." Then her mother's eyes widened and she lunged for the nearby trashcan, getting it to the side of the bed just in time as all the food Buffy had eaten in the past few hours spewed into the small, pink receptacle.
When she was spent, Buffy sank back among her pillows. A sheen of sweat covered her face and she felt a little dizzy.
"Mommy," she mumbled in a small voice, "I don' feel good."
"You aren't going to school today," Joyce said in a firm tone. "I've already called in and told them."
"Gotta go," Buffy protested weakly. "See Giles..."
Joyce put a cool hand on Buffy's hot forehead. "No, you're running a fever. Don't worry about tutoring. Your friend Amy is bringing your assignments." Joyce stood up. "Now I'm going to go get you some juice. You need to get fluids in you, and if you can't keep anything down, we're going to the doctor."
As her mother bustled out, Buffy sank down lower into the bed. Her knee twinged and hazy memories from the night before began to come back, and with them came the tears.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sonya woke up from her nightmare with a start. Her heart was beating fast, and her legs were burning. Sonya moaned, and then stopped abruptly. Her legs were burning! She could feel her legs!
Pushing the lingering images of her dream to a far corner of her mind to be analyzed later, she sat up and threw the covers off. Her legs actually looked a little pinker, but Sonya didn't know if that was real or just an illusion. She popped her morning pill from the bottle sitting on her night stand, and then sucked in a breath.
"Well, girl," Sonya told herself, "if you're gonna do it, do it now."
She slowly turned herself, positioning her legs so they dangled off the side of the bed. With one more deep breath, she set them flat on the floor. She could actually feel the carpet with her toes! Now came the test... Sonya slid her body off of the bed, and her legs supported her weight. She wobbled back and forth for a minute, and then found her balance.
"Giles!" Sonya screamed. "Giles, get in here!"
There was the sound of thumping footsteps and then Giles burst into the room. "What is it? What's wrong..." His voice trailed off into amazed silence as he took in the tableau before him.
"The treatment," he managed, "it's working..."
Sonya nodded. Then she tried to take a step... and tumbled to the ground. Giles swooped down to pick her up and set her in her chair.
"It's all right," he murmured consolingly. "Don't worry about that -- instead, concentrate on the fact that you stood!"
He put his hands on her shoulders, and she felt her anger and fear of falling fade away. Giles was right. The standing and the feeling was the important thing. Sonya couldn't wait to see Dr. Keller that afternoon and tell him the great news.
Giles leaned down and gave her a hug. "You're so strong that you amaze me sometimes," he said. Then, as if embarrassed to have shown so much emotion, he hurried out of the room to fix the two of them breakfast.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
During lunch, Amy sat at the table where she, Buffy and Oz had sat the day before. She had a turkey sandwich and an apple in front of her, but she wasn't eating. The scene outside the window was making her ill.
Sonya and Xander were playing kissy-face on the front lawn under the trees. Amy thought back to Joyce's call that morning, and she wondered how Xander could live with himself. Amy had no doubts that it was this Sonya thing that had made Buffy sick.
"Hey." Oz slumped into his usual seat.
"Hey," Amy replied with a sigh. "Sickening, isn't it?"
"Worse." Oz turned away from the window. "Where's Buffy?"
"She's really sick. Her mom said she's puking and running a fever."
"This just keeps getting better and better."
"Do you think there's anything we can do about it?" Amy asked. Then she looked at Oz -- really looked at him. There was something in his eyes... something that made Amy wonder what was really going on inside that head of his.
"We could kill Xander," Oz replied in a dead-pan tone.
Amy glanced sharply at him. His expression revealed nothing. "Anything besides homicide?" she tried again.
Oz shrugged. Then he stood.
"Are you all right?" Amy put a hand out to stop him from leaving.
"Fine." He shook her hand off and walked away. Amy watched him go, a worry frown crinkling her forehead.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"I'll be right back, OK, babe?" Xander asked with an endearing lopsided smile that made Sonya forgive him this new tendency to call her "babe."
"All right," she said with a smile. She watched him run into the school building with pride and pleasure. He was hers now... A footstep crunching the grass made her look to the side, and there stood Oz, looking at her with inscrutable eyes.
"What do you want?" she demanded, extremely embarrassed to feel a slight flush creeping onto her cheeks. The images of her nightmare came back to haunt her and she could actually feel Oz's lips on hers as if it had been real and not just a dream.
"Buffy's sick," Oz replied. "Buffy's never sick."
"So," Sonya muttered defensively. "What does that have to do with me?" But inside she started to feel a little twinge of worry. Slayers rarely got sick.
Oz squatted down so they were on eye-level. "It's got everything to do with you. Don't you see how things are spiraling out of control?"
"You're not going in for the 'Xander's demon possessed' theory, are you?" Sonya demanded in a biting tone, trying to keep from crying. "Angel tried that one out on me last night. As if the only way someone could love me is not of their own free will."
"I don't know if what's going on is real, or if there's something supernatural involved, but I don't like what it's doing to you, and to everyone else." Oz reached over and took her hand in his own, seldom-seen passion coloring his voice ever so slightly. "There were people who loved you before. You have a good and beautiful soul, Sonya. I noticed that the first day I saw you. But now something's clouding it. Let me help you."
After that speech -- the longest she'd ever heard pass his lips -- Sonya sat back, thoughts swirling through her brain. She examined some of the guilt that she'd been holding in check, and it shamed her -- what she'd done to Buffy especially. Sonya was not going to just give Xander back to Buffy. What good would that do? Xander had made his decision. But Buffy did deserve something better... She looked up at Oz and smiled a little, feeling a rush of trust and compassion for this reticent young man.
"Oz, what do you think I should do?"
Then Oz was roughly pulled backwards and thrown onto the ground.
"Get your measly paws off of my woman!" Xander yelled.
Oz sprang to his feet, and before Xander could do anything, Oz landed a punch to his midsection. Xander doubled over in pain, but quickly recovered to throw himself onto Oz. The two boys hit the ground rolling and fighting.
"Xander, stop it!" Sonya cried, watching helplessly. If she was still the Slayer she could have stopped this, but she wasn't...
With a sudden surge of strength Oz pushed Xander off of him and stood up, panting. Xander stood up too.
"It's not worth it," Oz said. His hooded gaze went from Xander, to Sonya, back to Xander. "I give up." Then he turned on his heel and walked off. Sonya watched him go, and saw Amy run up to him. Sonya frowned, feeling her gut twist painfully at the thought of something going on between Oz and the blonde, but then Xander took her attention.
"What were you doing holding his hand?" Xander demanded angrily.
"I wasn't holding his hand," Sonya protested. "He grabbed my hand. Do you really think I'd cheat on you, Xander, after everything I've gone through to get you in my life?" She paused, seeming to consider her words carefully. "I love you, Xander."
The expression on his face softened and he leaned in to give her a small kiss. "You're right, Sonya. I'm sorry."
Sonya held him tight in a long hug until the pressure of his arms around her drove the worries out of her head. But this time that tactic didn't work as well as it usually did...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
At her doctor's appointment that day, Sonya didn't even have to wait. Nurse Jane ushered her straight back to the examination room. A few second later Dr. Keller came through the door with all his girth in tow.
"How's my favorite patient?" he said, grinning from ear to ear.
"I'm OK, Dr. Keller," Sonya replied.
"Is something bothering you? You seem a bit perturbed." The doctor looked at her with concern.
Sonya shook her head quickly. She was not going to bore the doctor with the trials and tribulations of her rapidly evolving social life. But she did have good news to share.
"Not perturbed, more like ecstatic!" Then she filled him in on the toe wiggling and standing of the previous night and morning.
"Wonderful!" Dr. Keller boomed. "You're progressing so much more quickly than I had hoped. You've already moved leaps and bounds... er... to coin a phrase... beyond my other patients."
Sonya smiled, but didn't say anything. She attributed it to her Slayer genes. No more super-healing for her, but perhaps still a little more than normal people?
"After today's treatment, you may actually be able to walk out of here."
"You're kidding?" Sonya looked at him with wide eyes. She'd only dared think of this in her most secret dreams.
Dr. Keller shook his head. "No, no I'm not."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
After her treatment, Sonya sat up, and under Dr. Keller's guidance, she slowly slipped off the large, metal table. Dr. Keller took her arm and steadied her until she found her balance. Then he moved a few feet away.
"Walk to me," he ordered.
Suddenly, Sonya panicked. "What if I can't?" Crossing this boundary was scary. If it failed, she didn't know if she could pick up the pieces.
Dr. Keller's smiling face got suddenly cold. "Do it, Sonya. Do it now."
That was just the prodding she needed. She took a step. Then another, then another. When she reached the doctor on the other side of the room she cried, "I'm doing it!" She stopped talking to savor the experience. She was stepping forward on her own two feet, not dependent on a chair for movement. She could feel the cold tile under her bare feet and the air conditioning cooled her bare legs underneath her robe.
The doctor let her alone so she could change back into her street clothes, then he walked her -- albeit just a touch slowly -- out to the waiting room where Xander was slouched in a green chair. When he saw her standing there, Xander leapt from his chair and ran over to hug her tightly.
"I can't believe it! This is wonderful!" he yelled, causing Nurse Jane to make a shushing noise from behind her counter.
"I couldn't have done it without Dr. Keller," Sonya said, ready to finally introduce her boyfriend to the man who'd saved her life. They looked up to find Dr. Keller had gone.
"Oh well, I'll meet him next time," Xander said, kissing her on the cheek. "You have two more treatments, right?"
"Yeah." Sonya nodded, and together they started the long, slow walk to the parking lot. At the main door to the office, she turned and looked back down the long hall. (Where did he get off to so fast?)
"What's wrong, babe?" Xander asked, looking down at her with a quizzical expression. Then he leaned in and nibbled her ear lobe.
"Xander!" Sonya cried, pushing him off. "This isn't the place." But he'd succeeded in his mission to distract her.
"Where to now, milady?" Xander asked, helping her into the jeep with a flourish.
"The library," Sonya said decisively. "Giles has got to see this."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Amy stared up at Giles with a worried expression on her face as she finished updating him on Buffy's condition. The librarian seemed to be barely paying attention. And from what Oz had told her about the situation, Giles was supposed to be caring about this -- wasn't a Watcher some kind of mentor/father figure?
"...so her fever finally broke, but she's still not feeling well..." Amy paused and glanced at Oz standing next to her. He met her eyes and shrugged in agreement. Amy looked back at Giles. "And so Buffy permed her hair, bought a bunch of spandex and joined a cult that worships the almighty lima bean while listening to Madonna 24/7."
"I say, that's..." Giles paused with a furrowed brow. "What was that again, Miss Madison?"
"Just checking to make sure you were still with us," Amy said.
"Sorry," Giles replied, "it's just that I'm waiting for... nevermind. What were you saying about Miss Summers?"
"She asked us to come see if you had any messages for her, or any advice," Amy repeated in a firm tone.
"Buffy doesn't get sick," Oz interjected. "It's weird."
"True, true," Giles replied distractedly. His eyes kept darting to the door. "But perhaps it is just a normal flu. That has been known to happen."
Amy and Oz both frowned.
Suddenly, the outer doors to the library came open with a crash. Giles looked up with anticipation. Xander came running in. He skidded to a stop and held the door open.
"Dum, da, da, dum..." he said in ringing tones. "Lady and gentlemen, I am proud to introduce the new and improved, Miss Sonya Parker!"
Amy felt a rustling beside her. Oz had stepped forward and was staring at the door.
After a dramatic pause, Xander looked outside and said, "Hey, that's your cue."
"Xander!" Sonya's voice drifted in from outside. "Melodramatic, much? You didn't have to do that."
Then the girl came into view. She casually strolled into the library on her own two feet, wheelchair nowhere in evidence. Amy's mouth dropped open in shock.
Giles ran out from behind the circulation desk and gave Sonya a big hug. "I can't believe it. I'm so happy for you, my dear!"
Sonya hugged him back, a slight frown on her face. "Yeah, Giles... uh... thanks."
Her eyes met Oz's over Giles shoulder. Amy could practically feel the unspoken tension between the two of them.
"Oz..." Sonya said. Xander glanced between the two of them and scowled, but this time he didn't say anything.
"I'm glad you got what you wanted, Sonya," Oz said, his face unreadable. Then he turned and walked out of the library.
Amy watched him go, and then looked back toward the others. "Mr. Giles!" she cried. "Don't you even care about this Buffy thing?"
The faces of the three by the door turned to Amy with varying expressions. Xander seemed annoyed. "Why are we talking about her again?"
Giles was indifferent. "She'll be fine. Don't worry, Miss Madison."
Sonya was the only one to display any amount of concern over Buffy's welfare. She disentangled herself from Giles' grasp and walked slowly over to Amy. "What's wrong with Buffy? Is there anything I can do?"
Amy glared at the other girl. "Yeah, Sonya, you can just leave her alone!" Then, completely disgusted by this whole turn of events, Amy turned and walked to the doors through which Oz had disappeared. "Haven't you already done enough?" she called back over her shoulder. Then she left, the doors swinging shut silently behind her.