~*Hooray! Onto breakfast!*~

Damaged Egos and Anti Twins

Chapter 6: Mini Brooms

"Uh, you guys. Do you mind if I sit with you?" Draco whispered as they entered the great hall.

"Why?" Hermione demanded with an air of superiority.

"Come on Granger! If the rest of the Slytherins see this thing," he said, shaking the jar with Flako in it, "they'll use him as a badminton birdie! And you heard Snape!"

"Fine, just don't cause any trouble, and don't hit on anyone!" Ron said, his face flushed with anger.

"Oh, I know how much you wish to get me in bed Weasley, but I'm afraid I'm straight as pole." He said, pushing past Ron and pinching his bum sarcastically.

"And he just happens to be the Slytherin bicycle. Everyone gets a ride." Harry snickered into Ron's ear.

"I heard that Potta." Draco said as they sat down at the closest end of the Gryffindor table. Even though Draco was trying to keep hidden, all the girls at the Gryffindor table saw him instantly.

"Hiya Draco." Lavender said seductively as she scooted closer to him.

"Hello." Draco said giving her the once over.

"What's in the jar?" Lavender asked.

"Oh, uh, nothing!" Draco said, shoving his jar into his lap.

"Come on let me see!" Lavender said, reaching into Draco's crotch.

"Hey, those are the family jewels! Watch where you're grabbing woman!" He barked as Lavender pulled up the jar.

"Aw, he's so cute." Lavender said, tapping on the glass.

"Hey, watch it!" Flako barked. Draco sighed and took the jar back.

"He's a little mistake of Snape's." Draco said, opening the jar and letting Flako onto the table. The others did also. Barry immediately went for the edge of the table, and of course Jon jumped on his mini broom ((A/N: Tee-hee, Bri, you and your naughty mind!)) and dived after him in a flurry of heroics. Before the quartet knew it, the entire Gryffindor table was crowded around to watch the anti-twin freak show.

"What's with yours Draco?" Seamus asked as Flako adjusted his boa and Draco tried to pretend he didn't exist.

"Hey there cutie, want to fly on my mini broom?" Flako asked, winking at Seamus. Everyone started to laugh, except for Seamus, and Draco (who started to bang his head repeatedly on the table).

"Hey Harry, yours is a little…disturbed!" Ginny said, pointing at Barry who was sitting in the middle of table rocking back and forth.

"Yeah, he, um, he's a little scared of everything." Harry said, looking at Barry with concern. "Hey Barry, you want some fruit or something…" Harry said, going to pick up Barry.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Barry said, jumping away and hitting the fruit bowl.

"Barry, calm down." Ginny said, going to pick him up also.

"GET AWAY! YOU VIRGIN! I'M A PARTHENOPHOBIAC!" he said, running back into his jar. Everyone started to laugh as Ginny's eyes filled with tears. She ran out of the hall and into the girl's bathroom for the rest of the morning.

"Like none of you knew she was a virgin." Ron scoffed.

"That can be changed." Draco said  mischievously.

"Don't even think about it!" The gumdrop clan barked in unison.

"Fine, ruin my fun." Draco said with fake disappointment.

"So, what's yours like Hermione?" Neville asked.

"I'm bad ass, that's what I'm like!" Harmony chimed. "What are you some kind of pig!?" she asked, looking at Neville with disgust as his nose crinkled up.

"Oh, god! NOT A PIG!" Barry cried, closing his jar tightly.

"Jeeze, I thought your anti-twins were supposed to be your opposites!" Neville said, getting back up.

"And what is that supposed to mean!?" Hermione asked furiously.

"I think what Neville is trying to say is that your anti twin is a bitch too!" Seamus said, before running back to the other side of the table with Neville and Dean.

"Want me to poison their kool-aid?" Harmony asked Hermione as she sat fuming.

"No, that would be wrong." Hermione said through gritted teeth.

"SO?" Harmony asked, wielding her switch blade and running towards the Gryffindork boys.

~*~

            The next few days were long and stressful. Harry, Hermione, Ron and Draco had to be given their own small table at meals because of the complaints the staff was getting about their anti-twins. Seamus had been hit on 24 times by Flako. Dean, Neville, and Seamus were all complaining about stomach problems. Ginny had been harassed by Barry about being a virgin 16 times, and Jon was distracting all the girls.

"This bites." Ron said at dinner on Wednesday.

"Only two more days Ron. Look, their wings are already starting to grow." Hermione said, pointing to the Harmony's back before taking a big bite of Lasagna.

"What is this?" Draco said, still not familiar with muggle food.

"Haven't you ever had Italian before?" Harry asked.

"No. I've never been there either. I want to though. Their wine is excellent." He said, poking at his food.

"I love muggle food!" Flako exclaimed, taking a big bite of garlic bread.

"Oh shut up!" Draco snarled pouring himself some Grape Gatorade ((A/N: GO GRAPE GATORADE!)).

"I can't wait till this whole thing is over…" Harry mumbled to himself as Barry tried to drown himself in his goblet of Gatorade.

"I am so sick of your whining Potta!" Draco said, stabbing his lasagna, making it spurt a little.

"There's an 'R' in his name you know!" Hermione snapped, taking a bite of her garlic bread. Draco just glared at her, and they became engulfed in a serious glaring contest.

"Anyway," Ron said, rolling his eyes at the two egotistical teens, "I haven't been able to get any sleep with these too messing around all night!" Ron said, eyeing Barry and Jon.

"Yeah, I know," Harry said, leaning back and rubbing his eyes, "I'm surprised one of Barry's methods of suicide hasn't worked yet." He said as Barry headed for the edge of the table again. Jon pulled out his broom once more and dived for Barry.

"3…2…1…" Harry and Ron said in harmony. Right after '1' Jon had flown back up and dropped Barry back on the table.

"If I wasn't a hemophobiac, I would so beat you to shit right now!" Barry yelled at Jon, waving his fist at him. Jon just rolled his eyes as he perched on his broom.

"Hey, look who got some balls!' Harmony said, munching on some of the meat from the lasagna.

"YOU BLINKED!" Draco cried, pointing at Hermione.

"I did not!" Hermione said defensively.

"I win, I win!" Draco said victoriously doing a little disco dance, humming "Saturday Night Fever".

"I thought you didn't know anything about muggles?" Harry asked. Draco stopped and looked at Harry incredulously, one hand still on his waist, the other pointing into the air.

"What?" he asked, lowering his hand.

"That is muggle disco." Hermione said, with a smirk.

"Whatever, I think not. We do that kind of dancing at ever Death Eater Barbeque, right after the live sacrificials. Oops, I shouldn't have said that." Draco said sarcastically, sipping his Gatorade.

"Sure…" Ron said, eyeing Draco wearily.

"But, the first half is true. You should see Voldy. He can sure Boogie-Woogie-Woogie. He won five competitions last summer." He said, smirking at Harry's angry face.

"Whatever…I'm going to bed!" Harry said through gritted teeth.

"Can I come?" Flako asked.

"NO!" Harry and Draco barked.