In the Space of a Journey
Chapter Four
The Streets of Sunnydale
"You sure knocked Faith down a few pegs, no pun intended," Buffy whispered to Sonya as they walked down the road. They'd driven across town in silence, hidden Sheila, and now Nicole walked several feet ahead of them.
"Maybe I got a little carried away," Sonya hissed back sheepishly. "She really pushed my buttons, and I let it show."
"Just a little bit." Buffy laughed softly. "But she deserved it."
"That's very unfair and judgmental of you."
The two girls glanced up to see Nicole had stopped walking, and was staring back at them with a hurt expression in her wide, green eyes.
"I'm sorry," Buffy mumbled. "I didn't realize you could hear us. Though I guess that's not much of an excuse..." Buffy still believed Faith had deserved her butt-kicking, but thus far Nicole hadn't done anything but follow orders. And having the girl catch them talking about her commander behind her back was disconcerting.
Sonya didn't have such a problem. She looked straight in Nicole's eyes as she and Buffy stopped walking and challenged her. "You may have to defend the girl because she's the leader of your commando squad, but I don't and I'm not going to. Faith is duplicitous, mean, sarcastic and she's got a real attitude problem."
Buffy glanced at Sonya with a small smile. "Some people could say that about you!"
The remark surprised a laugh out of Nicole, who could have no way of understanding the Slayer and the former-Slayer's complex relationship, but Sonya just shook her head at Buffy and continued her lecture. "If Faith isn't careful, she's going to get herself killed, and if you guys blindly follow her, she's going to get you killed as well."
Nicole's smile vanished, and an angry blush tinted her cheeks. When she spoke, emotion colored her gentle voice, bringing out the hint of a French accent that she still possessed after her long and thorough education. "Oh, yes? And what would you do if you were thrust into a strange and dangerous situation -- a situation where you'd been warned not to trust anyone? Would you just plunge in head first, or would you reconnoiter the area? And what would you do when you trail a vampire to it's lair and then discover that it has full access to the one person in town that you are supposed to trust?"
She stopped her barrage of questions for a moment and took a deep breath. Sonya opened her mouth for an angry reply, but Nicole started talking again before Sonya could get a word out. "Faith may have an 'attitude problem,' but she's got good reasons. And, yes, she's brash and sometimes unkind, but her job doesn't permit her the luxury of worrying about people's feelings. She's too busy worrying about their lives." Nicole finally stopped talking. Her cheeks were even pinker -- if such a thing were possible -- and her breath shuddered in deep gasps.
Sonya looked willing to continue the argument, but Buffy took pity on Nicole and said, "Come on, girls, we all feel we're in the right here, so maybe we should just agree to disagree." At the mutinous glances both girls gave her, Buffy added in her best persuasive tone, "Sonya, you know as well as I that we reacted to Angel badly before we knew the truth about his soul -- Faith can't be faulted for her caution there, even though it got her on all of our bad sides. But, Nicole, you have to admit that she goes about things in a way specifically designed to provoke us."
"I guess on the surface it looked suspicious," Sonya admitted, "but she should have asked before barging through the window."
"Perhaps," Nicole grudgingly admitted, "but you shouldn't judge until you know the whole story."
"And we'll try and be better about that from now on, right?" Buffy asked.
"All of us?" Nicole and Sonya both nodded. "Good. Now let's get on with it. Sonya and I have to get a little sleep before flying out tomorrow." Buffy checked her watch as they started walking -- 1 a.m. already.
The factory that had once housed Spike and Willow's lair loomed before them. A twinge of unease rushed up and down Buffy's spine. She paused, staring at the dirty building with broken out and boarded over windows, wondering if the feeling was her Slayer-sense trying to tell her something. Then again, some very traumatic things had happened to her within this building -- the feeling could just be old memories resurfacing.
As the Slayer, Nicole and Sonya looked to Buffy as the de-facto leader of the team. She took a deep breath, tried to put the feeling behind her, and said, "It looks deserted. Let's do a perimeter check and rendezvous by the front door. You two go left. I'll go right."
Not thrilled at the partnership, but willing to give it a try, the brunette and the red head vanished one way. Buffy crept around the other way. She looked for signs of habitation and found none. When she made it to the front door, Sonya and Nicole were waiting.
"Anything?" Buffy asked.
"Nothing," Sonya answered. Nicole nodded in agreement.
"All right," Buffy decided, "we'll go in and do a quick sweep. It seems deserted, but you can never be too careful. Sonya?"
In a routine the two girls had developed on the return of Sonya's walking ability, Sonya kicked the doors open, and Buffy sprang inside, stake extended and ready. The large room was deserted.
"Clear!" Buffy called back, and Sonya and Nicole entered the building.
"Why have we come here?" Nicole questioned, looking around in distaste at the inside of the factory. It hadn't been in stellar condition when Willow, Spike and their minions lived there, but now it looked even worse: crumbling furnishings, dirty walls, stray animal droppings, a big hole in one of the walls from Oz's van...
"This was where the last ruling vamps of Sunnydale made their home," Buffy explained briefly. "We check it out every now and then to see if Spike has come back or if some other vamps have reclaimed the territory."
"Spike... as in William the Bloody?" Nicole questioned.
"Yeah, we had a whole vampire civil war on our hands," Buffy said. She walked a few steps inside and stared down at a scorch mark on the floor. "This is where Willow, the vampire queen at the time, died. Spike killed her with a flame thrower. It was a mutiny and Xander, Angel and I were caught in the middle."
"With a so-called good vampire and a Slayer, those are good odds against even many vampires," Nicole commented.
"That was before I got my powers," Buffy said quietly. "Well, I did get my powers at the end of that fight, but I didn't even know what was happening or that me getting the powers was a possibility. It was amazing that we got out alive. Spike..." Buffy stopped herself. If the commandos resented them for letting Angel fight on their team, there was no way they'd understand an alliance with Spike -- no matter how short-lived the alliance or how bad the odds against them.
Nicole slanted a suspicious glance at the Slayer, but didn't say anything. Buffy had noticed a large, wooden table decorated with thick leather straps at the corners. She walked slowly over to it, reached out and touched one of the straps.
"It's still here," Buffy whispered, mostly to herself.
Sonya, who had walked over, heard the comment. "Well, I guess it hasn't been that long really -- only three months."
"Yeah," Buffy agreed, seeing Nathan, the evil sorcerer who wanted her blood, standing over her with a wicked-sharp knife. The only time in her life that she'd felt more helpless was two months ago when her powers started to vanish and no one knew why. "But somehow it feels more like a lifetime. So much has happened since then."
"I can agree with that."
Buffy looked up at Sonya, and from her expression, judged that the girl was having her own Nathan flashbacks. None of this was productive, so Buffy said, "All right, this place looks pretty beat. Let's go check out the graveyard."
"Maybe there will be some actual vampires there," Nicole muttered.
Sonya rolled her eyes and was about to make a snappy comeback, when they heard a growl behind them. The three girls turned to see golden eyes glowing at them in the darkness. Sonya readied her crossbow, and Buffy pulled out her stake again. Nicole just stood there. Buffy would have told her to get a weapon from her amply-supplied belt, but there wasn't time.
The figure that owned the glowing eyes sprang directly at her. Buffy tried to leap out of the way, but it moved too fast for that. It tackled her, and then they were rolling around on the dirty ground in hand-to-hand combat. Buffy aimed her stake at the creature's heart -- it looked like a vampire, but it didn't speak, and it seemed wizened somehow. It's skin hung loosely on it's bones. It batted her hand away, and the stake went clattering. Buffy was able to hold the thing away from her throat -- just barely -- but she wasn't making any headway in defeating it.
"Some help here?" Buffy grunted from between gritted teeth as the creature's claw-like fingers gouged a track in the skin of her shoulder. Buffy raised her foot and jabbed at the thing's gut, but that didn't phase it.
Sonya snapped into action and fired her crossbow, but the creature rolled at just that instant, and the bolt missed.
Scrambling for another bolt, Sonya hissed, "Nicole! A little help here..."
Nicole didn't reply. She seemed frozen, staring at the creature with her arms outstretched.
Then Sonya found another bolt, loaded and fired again. This time the bolt hit the thing in the leg. The strange vampire yelled and hissed in pain. Buffy used it's moment of distraction to kick it again -- in it's injured leg. Then she shoved with all her might and the thing went flying backwards. It landed on the concrete floor several feet away, and immediately it was struggling to its feet and moved toward them again on all fours. Sonya fired another bolt. It would have gone into the thing's heart, if it hadn't flattened itself to the ground.
Suddenly, Nicole screamed, and the creature burst into flames. Buffy and Sonya froze, their eyes glued to the grisly spectacle. It burned for a second, evil howls echoing in their ears. And then the fire took over completely, and the creature vanished in a huge burst of flame, turning into a pile of blackened ash.
After a second, Buffy said quietly, "It must've been some kind of vampire if fire can do *that* to it."
"It was a feral vampire. If a vampire doesn't find its first meal soon enough, it can go totally animal. It depends somewhat on the personality of the human that becomes the vampire -- if the person had access to their animalistic tendencies which can be amplified by the demon and the hunger -- so it doesn't happen often, but once a vampire goes feral, it's nearly irreversible. Even if it feeds, it will still be animalistic."
Sonya and Buffy stared at Nicole.
"How do you know that?" Sonya asked.
"I'm Watcher trained and educated," Nicole replied. "Our team doesn't have the luxury of a full-time Watcher. We have to know enough to figure out what we're dealing with ourselves."
"Those were some impressive pyrotechnics," Buffy said, giving the red head an approving look.
Nicole accepted the compliment with a nod. "And you two have some impressive skills as well."
"If I could learn to aim better," Sonya remarked bitterly.
"You did fine," Buffy assured her.
"I only hit it once!" Sonya cried angrily.
"You're always your own worst critic," Buffy said. "That thing was fast. And strong. And a good dodger."
"And after being the Slayer, I'd imagine it would be hard to get used to firing without the help of your powers," Nicole added.
Sonya looked at the new girl, trying to discern if there was an insult behind the comment, but she couldn't find one. "Well, I'm not happy about it, but thanks for trying."
"You're never happy about it, but I know you're good, so that's all that matters." Buffy slung an arm around Sonya's shoulders, and started them all walking out of the factory. "Now, let's get out of here. We've still got a graveyard or two to deal with."
As they stepped out into the warm nighttime air, Nicole looked at the two Sunnydale veterans and asked, "How many cemeteries are there here anyway?"
"Thirteen," Buffy answered quickly.
"Each with it's on distinct personality," Sonya added. "And don't forget that new one on the east side of town that's set to open in, what, six months?"
"Isn't that a bit excessive for one small town?" Nicole replied with a small frown.
Buffy shook her head. "Not when that small town sits on a Hellmouth."
A little later, when they were patrolling through the nearest cemetery, Buffy motioned for Sonya to go on ahead and stayed behind to talk to Nicole.
"Thanks for what you did back there," Buffy said sincerely. "You saved us."
Nicole blushed a little at the compliment. "You and Sonya would have gotten him eventually. All I did was end things more quickly. I just wish I hadn't frozen up for a minute -- I could have fried him before he jumped you."
"Your talent would come in really handy fighting vampires on a regular basis," Buffy remarked in a casual tone. "Do you know what the Council has in store for you once we get back from our trip?"
"We don't get to know that far in advance," Nicole said. Her pale skin glowed luminously in the silvery moonlight.
"Well, I can't say anything about the guys because I don't know them, and I won't say anything else to you about Faith," Buffy said with a smile, "but if you wanted to stay on in Sunnydale after we get back, I'm sure Giles would approve. A pyrotechnic is a great defense against vampires."
Nicole gave Buffy a sharp glance. "You think Giles is coming back?"
Buffy frowned. "Why wouldn't he? I mean, he did lie to the Council, but it was all for a good cause. Sonya's life is important. They have to see that, right?" Nicole's expression didn't reassure the Slayer. "Have you heard something, Nicole?"
The other girl shook her head. "I've heard nothing. I just know the Council. They don't brook betrayal well, Buffy, no matter the cause." Nicole swallowed nervously, and forced a smile. "But maybe you are right. Perhaps there's nothing to worry about."
"Or perhaps I'm not worried enough," Buffy mumbled under her breath.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In the living room of the condo, Faith and Angel eyed one another warily. Faith looked tense. Angel guessed she anticipated another attack. Not that he blamed her after those she'd endured thus far. He was tempted to fulfill her expectations, but he restrained himself.
"So," Angel said aloud, not voicing any of his thoughts.
"So..." Faith replied, placing her hands on her black spandex-clad hips.
"Any thoughts on how we should proceed?" Angel sat down on the couch, pretending to be perfectly at ease. With this girl he couldn't let her have any advantage.
"I don't suppose that you're going to step back and let me take charge of things," Faith said sarcastically. She straddled the arm of the couch and stared at him with snapping dark eyes.
"Not a chance," Angel replied, leaning forward.
"Didn't think so." Faith studied him for a moment, and then she was all business. "I think Rio should work with your witches. He's well-trained, but he's the newest member of the team, so he'll benefit from time with those who have more combat experience."
Angel nodded. "Sounds workable. I'm sure Ms. Calendar and Amy will be glad for the help. Of course, they usually stay behind during missions. They are the researchers and the spell casters, not the front lines."
"Agreed," Faith said. She seemed a bit surprised that the word actually came out of her mouth regarding the two teams. "Where's the headquarters?"
"Usually we use the Sunnydale High School library," Angel told her, "but it's locked up tight for the break. We can get in if we need to, but Giles and I thought this condo would make the best headquarters. We've all got keys. It has a good quantity of books and resources, and no one will get suspicious of people traipsing through the school."
"What about patrols?" Faith asked. "We generally break up into teams of two to cover more ground."
"And you still have backup," Angel surmised.
"Nicole and Terrance make a good team," Faith continued as if he hadn't even spoken. Angel flashed her a dark look, but listened. "That's the way we usually break things down -- Nicole and Terrance and me and Rio."
"Sounds fine, except for one thing," Angel inserted, talking loudly enough to ride right over her strident tones. She closed her mouth and listened, but obviously wasn't too happy about it. Angel continued, "If Rio is with the girls at headquarters, that leaves you and I... together."
"Think you can handle it?" Faith challenged.
"I'll be fine," Angel asserted. "I was just worried about you. You don't seem the type to be able to trust a vampire."
"Maybe that's why I want you on my team." Faith tucked a strand of shiny, brown hair behind her ear and then crossed her arms over her chest. "So you stay where I can watch you."
"Seeing as I don't trust you farther than I can throw you, I'll agree to this," Angel said. He didn't want to be stuck with her, but he didn't want to wonder what plots she was unfolding elsewhere either. "If you think you can keep up with me..."
"I can keep up with anyone." Faith stood and walked over until she was right up in Angel's face. She enunciated each word with a poke to his chest. "Especially you."
Angel reached up, grabbed her hand, and in one swift movement he was standing with her arm pinioned behind her back. "I wouldn't be so sure of that."
To his surprise, Faith laughed. "You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" Her hand behind her back twitched, and before Angel realized it, she had gouged his skin with her fingernails. The pain shocked him into letting her go, though his undead flesh began to knit itself back together almost instantly.
When he looked up, Faith had vaulted over the couch and out of his reach. He said, "You are, too."
"Don't I know it." Her smile shone with self-satisfaction.
Privately, Angel vowed that next time Faith would not win, but now was not the time for such things. Just then the door opened to reveal Sonya and Nicole, both looking a little the worse for wear.
"What happened?" Angel asked Sonya quickly. His eyes clamped on to the open door, but no one else was out there.
Following his glance, Sonya said, "I dropped Buffy off at home before we came back here. I would have dropped Nicole at her motel, but she insisted on coming back here, in case *she* was still here." Faith and Sonya exchanged a dark look, but neither was up to following through with the implied threat at the moment.
"Nicole," Faith said, "report."
"It was mostly quiet," Nicole said in her cultured voice. Angel noted the hint of French in the rolls of her "r's" and the pronunciation of some of her vowels -- but it was only enough to give her a mysterious air, not enough to impede understanding. She continued, "I learned the location of all the graveyards and several other places of frequent vampire activity."
"Something else happened," Faith said. "A full report, Nicole, now."
"There was a feral vampire. It jumped us, but we killed it." Nicole glanced at Faith to see if she wanted more details.
"A feral vampire!" Angel exclaimed. "I haven't seen one of those in years."
"Well, you know Sunnydale," Sonya said sarcastically, "if the demon is at all possible, it will find its way here." Then she looked up at Angel in surprise, belatedly realizing what he had said. "You knew about them?"
"Doesn't everyone?" Angel replied.
"I didn't!" Sonya exclaimed. "Buffy didn't."
"Some Slayer," Faith muttered. "Even *I* knew that."
"Be fair, Faith," Nicole inserted. "We *have* to know. We don't have Watchers to do that for us." Sonya and Angel both glanced at the girl in surprise for her defense of Buffy.
"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" Faith asked.
Sonya stepped toward Faith. Faith stiffened her spine and readied herself for more action. "Wanna take another swing at me?"
Sensing the deterioration of the situation, Angel stepped in between the two girls. He grabbed Faith by one arm and Nicole by the other. "All right, girls, let's get out of here and let Giles and Sonya have their home back." Nicole followed along willingly, but Faith he had to tug fairly hard to get her to move. Sonya followed them to the door.
Once they were over the threshold, she called, "Bye-bye, now. Don't let any monsters get you while we're gone."
"Thanks, Son, really," Angel said dryly, but he wasn't really offended. That's just how they were together.
Nicole just went on her way without responding.
Faith, on the other hand, gave Sonya a saccharine-sweet smile and replied, "Have fun in little, old England, my dear. I'll see you when you get back, and we can finish what we started. If you come back, that is."
Sonya looked puzzled, but she didn't give in to the temptation. Instead she just slammed the door in their faces. Faith ripped her arm out of Angel's grip and motioned to Nicole.
"C'mon. Let's go. The guys are waiting for us back at the hotel."
"I'll meet you here after sundown tomorrow?" Angel called after her.
"Sure, whatever," Faith tossed back over her shoulder. "Let's just hope no bad things come out during the day, while you're incapacitated."
"If they do, I'm sure you can handle them all by your bitty, little self," Angel replied with a sneer. Once the words were out of his mouth, he realized how ridiculous he sounded. He opened his mouth to say as much, but one glance at Faith's retreating figure stopped him.
"G'night, Angel," Faith responded cattily. "Don't let the sunbeams bite."
Angel watched her walk away, restraining any more comebacks. They could do that all night, and he was sure they would continue the witty repartee throughout the days to come. (What a hellion) Angel thought, shaking his head. (And I get stuck dealing with her. Great.) Looking up at her back, which was facing him, a wry smile twisted his lips. (Her only saving grace is that she's not bad to look at while you're fighting with her. Nice ass -- too bad it's her best feature.)
Still shaking his head, now because of his thoughts rather than the situation, Angel turned the other direction and headed for home.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
After the meeting, Xander went home. Emotionally exhausted, he fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He didn't move until the beeping of his alarm woke him up, very reluctantly, at seven thirty the next morning. Groaning, he rubbed his scratchy eyes and stretched.
"Turn that damn thing off, boy!" his dad bellowed from the master bedroom down the hall.
"Yeah, yeah!" Xander muttered, switching the alarm clock off. To himself, he grumbled, "It's WAY too early for this," he muttered. "Neither Giles nor the airport should expect me to show up this early after what I went through yesterday."
He stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom for a shower. That was the only thing that would wake him up this morning. He randomly twisted the knobs in the shower, waited a few second and then stepped in. The blast of cold water that hit him in the face woke him up completely! Xander had to bite his tongue so as not to yell and wake his father up again. That wouldn't be pretty. Leaning down, he twisted the knobs for more hot water. None came.
"Dad!" Xander moaned between chattering teeth. "You promised to get the hot water heater fixed so it would stop doing this." Quickly, he began to shampoo and lather up his body. "So much for promises. I should have known better."
A few minutes later, a cleaner, bluer and much more awake Xander was in his room throwing stuff into a duffel bag. In his head, he could hear Giles remonstrating, "Xander, Xander, you should have done that last night."
"Well, I would have," Xander mumbled to the phantom Giles, "if you hadn't summoned me for the so-called *emergency* meeting." Seeing the navy blue folder the Watcher had given him on the floor -- it was sticking out from underneath his bed, but how it had gotten there, Xander had no clue -- he picked it up and leafed through it. His ticket and everything else was in place. He doubled checked that he had his passport, and found it in the side pocket of his carry-on. Squinting at the "what to pack" list, Xander compared it to the rumpled clothing and junk laying scattered on his bed. His eyes darted to the clock. Eight fifteen.
"I'm going to be late. I'm going to be late..." The muttered phrase became his mantra as Xander clumsily folded clothes and stuffed them in the duffel bag.
"What are you doing, Alexander?"
Xander looked up to see his mother standing in the doorway wearing a red and white striped robe and a confused expression. A yellowed bruise colored her right cheek. Xander winced inwardly, as he did every time he saw marks like that on her. But he hadn't been here to protect her. He'd been out trying to save the world. He tried to tell himself that it was more important to save the world, but it never made him feel any better. Xander couldn't wait to be gone from this house. Forever would be good, but a week was a nice start. If only he could take his mother with him -- not to England, but when he finally left for good -- but she wouldn't go. He knew because he'd asked. When he was twelve, he'd told his mother that the two of them should leave and never come back. His mother had refused because of her 'love' for his father.
Trying to keep the emotions inside him from showing on his face, he answered, "I'm packing for my Spring Break trip. Remember, Mom, I'm going to England with Mr. Giles and some kids from school?"
She stared at him blankly. "Are you? How did we pay for the ticket?"
"I told you." Xander sighed, and went through the story again. He didn't know why he bothered. She never remembered anything about him. He was lucky if she remembered how old he was, much less his daily plans. "Mr. Giles got us discount rates because we're students. We're going with kids from other high schools on one of those pre-arranged tour things. I paid for the rest of it out of the money I saved from my summer job at the hot dog joint. Remember now?"
"Oh, yes, I suppose so." She moved into the room and surveyed his packing efforts. "Alexander, honey, you're not doing a very good job of this. By the time you get off the plane all this stuff will be wrinkled beyond repair."
"I know, but I'm running late." Xander looked helplessly at the mess on the bed.
Looking more maternal than she had in a long time, his mom bustled into the room and started folding clothes with an expert hand. "How long until you have to leave?"
Xander looked at the clock again. "I've got to leave here in about twenty-five minutes to be at the school by nine for my ride to the airport."
"We haven't much time." She shook all the clothes he'd already put in the duffel bag -- luckily he'd thought ahead enough to wash them two days earlier -- and started re-folding them. "I'll do this, and you take care of your carry-on. Don't forget shampoo and a toothbrush."
Reverting to childhood habits, Xander mumbled, "Yes, Mom," and the hustled into the bathroom to get the requested items. "This is like the time she got me ready to go to camp the summer after fifth grade." But secretly, he liked it.
Twenty minutes later, all his clothes were neatly folded and packed. He had everything from casual wear in case they got to do any sight-seeing to nice clothes to wear in meetings with the Council. He also had remembered all his toiletries, and even a book, a deck of cards and a notebook and pen for diversion on the plane. And thanks to his day job last summer, he even had extra cash for whatever expenses came his way.
His mother bustled out of the room and came back with a small object in a cloth bag. "Here take this."
"What is it?"
"My travel iron." She smiled a little sadly. "I bought it for that trip your father and I were supposed to take to Niagara Falls. It's never been used. Maybe you can get some use out of it."
"Thanks, Mom." He leaned down to give her a quick hug. "Don't miss me too much."
"How long will you be gone?"
Xander sighed. "A week, Mom. All of Spring Break." He started down the stairs, and she followed a pace or two behind. When he got to the front door, he reached back and gave her another fierce hug. "Be really careful, Mom, OK. If anything... happens, promise me you'll go to Uncle Rory's."
She darted a nervous glance at the staircase. "What would happen, dear? You're the one who should be careful. Traipsing around a foreign country. France, did you say?"
"England," Xander corrected her. "England, Mom. Do you want the number of the place I'm staying, just in case?"
"There's no need," she said, clutching the neck of her robe. "Bye, Alexander."
"Good bye, Mom." Sad that the moment of mother/son closeness was gone -- though he'd expected as much -- Xander opened the door and stepped out on the porch.
As he hoisted his bags onto his shoulders, she walked to the threshold to ask a question. "Is that nice girl going along with you?"
"Which girl, Mom, Buffy? I told you that she and I broke up."
"No, no, not her. That other girl. The really pretty one with the quiet ways and the sweet smile. Willow! That's her name. I always liked Willow. How is she, anyway? I haven't seen her around much lately." His mother looked up at him from her confused, watery blue eyes.
Xander had to fight back a sudden surge of tears. Of all the times for his mother to try and rekindle her interest in his life! He didn't know if her memory lapses about him were due to his father's beatings, her ever-growing taste for alcohol to drown out her pain, a lack of maternal feelings or just a lack of love for him completely. Over the years, beaten down by her lack of response and refusals to leave his father, Xander had thrown himself into whatever life he could find that would keep him out of the house as long as possible. It was funny how the horrible could become the usual, and you didn't even notice it.
Getting himself under control, Xander answered, "No, Mom. Willow's not going. She died two years ago, remember? The same time as Jesse." He looked into her eyes and watched as the clouded confusion crept back in. A moment later and the blank stare was back. "Good bye, Mom. I'll see you when I get back."
"Good bye," she called, waving, but the look on her face made him wonder if she still remembered where he was going.
Xander turned his back on the situation before the familiar, frustrating feelings of helplessness overcame him, and he got in the jeep and drove off with a squeal. He consciously did not look in the rearview mirror to see if she was still out there, or if she'd vanished back into the house.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Buffy and Joyce were the first people to reach the library that morning, mostly due to Joyce's prodding. Exhausted from her night of emotional ups and downs, physical exertion and surprises, she could have slept all day. But Joyce had woken her up at seven o'clock with a cheery, "Rise and shine, sweetie! I know you didn't get in until three, but that doesn't mean we can be late. Get up and get ready, and you can sleep more on the plane." They pulled into the library parking lot at five till nine.
Soon after, Oz's familiar van drove up with Sonya behind the wheel. When she screeched to a halt, a green-faced Giles got shakily out of the passenger seat. He walked over to Joyce and asked, "Would you mind if I rode with you to the airport?"
"That's fine," Joyce assured him. They had planned to take Joyce and Oz's vehicles for the drive to LAX. Theoretically, the drive should only take them two hours, but if traffic was bad, the California natives knew it could take them as much as four hours to make it through the maze of LA highways. That's why they were leaving at nine, and their plane didn't leave until two in the afternoon.
A few seconds later, Xander pulled up in his jeep. He grabbed his bags, and threw them in the back of Oz's van.
"Where do you want me?" he asked. He had a smile on his face, but Buffy could tell that something was bothering him. He had the tight look around his eyes that he got sometimes. When they'd been dating, she'd always wondered what caused that, but he would never tell her. She sighed. If only things were better between them, she'd try asking again. But things were worse now than before. And so confusing. She didn't know what to do.
Joyce took it upon herself to answer his question. "Well, I'm driving my minivan, and Sonya is driving Oz's van. I think Oz is comfortable in there, so he's not moving, and Giles and Buffy are riding with me. You can go wherever you want. There's more than enough room in both vehicles."
Buffy watched Xander glance between the two vans. She knew exactly what he was thinking. He could ride in the passenger seat of Oz's van, next to Sonya, whom he still was barely speaking to. Or he could ride in her mother's van, in the backseat next to her and feel awkward about their situation. What a horrible choice for him.
Abruptly, Buffy said, "Mom, do you mind if I ride with Sonya?"
"No, not if you want to," Joyce replied amiably. "We're all going to the same place."
"All right, everybody," Buffy said, "let's get out of here." As she made her way over to the zebra stripped van, Xander touched her shoulder.
"Thanks," he said softly.
"It's OK," Buffy replied. When he looked at her that way, she couldn't help but smile at him a little. Part of her wanted to reach out and hug him. The unexplained sadness in his eyes hurt her soul. But she settled for just touching his hand. He opened the van door for her. Buffy got in, and then looked at him.
He looked straight back at her. "Do you think maybe we can talk for a little while on the plane?"
Divided on this issue, as always, part of Buffy wanted to yell, "No, no, no! No more torture!" But the other part of her wanted that above all else. After a short pause, she said, "Yeah. We could do that."
"Good." Then he shut her door, and got in the backseat of her mother's van. A few minutes later, and the two vans pulled out of the parking lot on the way to the airport.
Chapter Four
The Streets of Sunnydale
"You sure knocked Faith down a few pegs, no pun intended," Buffy whispered to Sonya as they walked down the road. They'd driven across town in silence, hidden Sheila, and now Nicole walked several feet ahead of them.
"Maybe I got a little carried away," Sonya hissed back sheepishly. "She really pushed my buttons, and I let it show."
"Just a little bit." Buffy laughed softly. "But she deserved it."
"That's very unfair and judgmental of you."
The two girls glanced up to see Nicole had stopped walking, and was staring back at them with a hurt expression in her wide, green eyes.
"I'm sorry," Buffy mumbled. "I didn't realize you could hear us. Though I guess that's not much of an excuse..." Buffy still believed Faith had deserved her butt-kicking, but thus far Nicole hadn't done anything but follow orders. And having the girl catch them talking about her commander behind her back was disconcerting.
Sonya didn't have such a problem. She looked straight in Nicole's eyes as she and Buffy stopped walking and challenged her. "You may have to defend the girl because she's the leader of your commando squad, but I don't and I'm not going to. Faith is duplicitous, mean, sarcastic and she's got a real attitude problem."
Buffy glanced at Sonya with a small smile. "Some people could say that about you!"
The remark surprised a laugh out of Nicole, who could have no way of understanding the Slayer and the former-Slayer's complex relationship, but Sonya just shook her head at Buffy and continued her lecture. "If Faith isn't careful, she's going to get herself killed, and if you guys blindly follow her, she's going to get you killed as well."
Nicole's smile vanished, and an angry blush tinted her cheeks. When she spoke, emotion colored her gentle voice, bringing out the hint of a French accent that she still possessed after her long and thorough education. "Oh, yes? And what would you do if you were thrust into a strange and dangerous situation -- a situation where you'd been warned not to trust anyone? Would you just plunge in head first, or would you reconnoiter the area? And what would you do when you trail a vampire to it's lair and then discover that it has full access to the one person in town that you are supposed to trust?"
She stopped her barrage of questions for a moment and took a deep breath. Sonya opened her mouth for an angry reply, but Nicole started talking again before Sonya could get a word out. "Faith may have an 'attitude problem,' but she's got good reasons. And, yes, she's brash and sometimes unkind, but her job doesn't permit her the luxury of worrying about people's feelings. She's too busy worrying about their lives." Nicole finally stopped talking. Her cheeks were even pinker -- if such a thing were possible -- and her breath shuddered in deep gasps.
Sonya looked willing to continue the argument, but Buffy took pity on Nicole and said, "Come on, girls, we all feel we're in the right here, so maybe we should just agree to disagree." At the mutinous glances both girls gave her, Buffy added in her best persuasive tone, "Sonya, you know as well as I that we reacted to Angel badly before we knew the truth about his soul -- Faith can't be faulted for her caution there, even though it got her on all of our bad sides. But, Nicole, you have to admit that she goes about things in a way specifically designed to provoke us."
"I guess on the surface it looked suspicious," Sonya admitted, "but she should have asked before barging through the window."
"Perhaps," Nicole grudgingly admitted, "but you shouldn't judge until you know the whole story."
"And we'll try and be better about that from now on, right?" Buffy asked.
"All of us?" Nicole and Sonya both nodded. "Good. Now let's get on with it. Sonya and I have to get a little sleep before flying out tomorrow." Buffy checked her watch as they started walking -- 1 a.m. already.
The factory that had once housed Spike and Willow's lair loomed before them. A twinge of unease rushed up and down Buffy's spine. She paused, staring at the dirty building with broken out and boarded over windows, wondering if the feeling was her Slayer-sense trying to tell her something. Then again, some very traumatic things had happened to her within this building -- the feeling could just be old memories resurfacing.
As the Slayer, Nicole and Sonya looked to Buffy as the de-facto leader of the team. She took a deep breath, tried to put the feeling behind her, and said, "It looks deserted. Let's do a perimeter check and rendezvous by the front door. You two go left. I'll go right."
Not thrilled at the partnership, but willing to give it a try, the brunette and the red head vanished one way. Buffy crept around the other way. She looked for signs of habitation and found none. When she made it to the front door, Sonya and Nicole were waiting.
"Anything?" Buffy asked.
"Nothing," Sonya answered. Nicole nodded in agreement.
"All right," Buffy decided, "we'll go in and do a quick sweep. It seems deserted, but you can never be too careful. Sonya?"
In a routine the two girls had developed on the return of Sonya's walking ability, Sonya kicked the doors open, and Buffy sprang inside, stake extended and ready. The large room was deserted.
"Clear!" Buffy called back, and Sonya and Nicole entered the building.
"Why have we come here?" Nicole questioned, looking around in distaste at the inside of the factory. It hadn't been in stellar condition when Willow, Spike and their minions lived there, but now it looked even worse: crumbling furnishings, dirty walls, stray animal droppings, a big hole in one of the walls from Oz's van...
"This was where the last ruling vamps of Sunnydale made their home," Buffy explained briefly. "We check it out every now and then to see if Spike has come back or if some other vamps have reclaimed the territory."
"Spike... as in William the Bloody?" Nicole questioned.
"Yeah, we had a whole vampire civil war on our hands," Buffy said. She walked a few steps inside and stared down at a scorch mark on the floor. "This is where Willow, the vampire queen at the time, died. Spike killed her with a flame thrower. It was a mutiny and Xander, Angel and I were caught in the middle."
"With a so-called good vampire and a Slayer, those are good odds against even many vampires," Nicole commented.
"That was before I got my powers," Buffy said quietly. "Well, I did get my powers at the end of that fight, but I didn't even know what was happening or that me getting the powers was a possibility. It was amazing that we got out alive. Spike..." Buffy stopped herself. If the commandos resented them for letting Angel fight on their team, there was no way they'd understand an alliance with Spike -- no matter how short-lived the alliance or how bad the odds against them.
Nicole slanted a suspicious glance at the Slayer, but didn't say anything. Buffy had noticed a large, wooden table decorated with thick leather straps at the corners. She walked slowly over to it, reached out and touched one of the straps.
"It's still here," Buffy whispered, mostly to herself.
Sonya, who had walked over, heard the comment. "Well, I guess it hasn't been that long really -- only three months."
"Yeah," Buffy agreed, seeing Nathan, the evil sorcerer who wanted her blood, standing over her with a wicked-sharp knife. The only time in her life that she'd felt more helpless was two months ago when her powers started to vanish and no one knew why. "But somehow it feels more like a lifetime. So much has happened since then."
"I can agree with that."
Buffy looked up at Sonya, and from her expression, judged that the girl was having her own Nathan flashbacks. None of this was productive, so Buffy said, "All right, this place looks pretty beat. Let's go check out the graveyard."
"Maybe there will be some actual vampires there," Nicole muttered.
Sonya rolled her eyes and was about to make a snappy comeback, when they heard a growl behind them. The three girls turned to see golden eyes glowing at them in the darkness. Sonya readied her crossbow, and Buffy pulled out her stake again. Nicole just stood there. Buffy would have told her to get a weapon from her amply-supplied belt, but there wasn't time.
The figure that owned the glowing eyes sprang directly at her. Buffy tried to leap out of the way, but it moved too fast for that. It tackled her, and then they were rolling around on the dirty ground in hand-to-hand combat. Buffy aimed her stake at the creature's heart -- it looked like a vampire, but it didn't speak, and it seemed wizened somehow. It's skin hung loosely on it's bones. It batted her hand away, and the stake went clattering. Buffy was able to hold the thing away from her throat -- just barely -- but she wasn't making any headway in defeating it.
"Some help here?" Buffy grunted from between gritted teeth as the creature's claw-like fingers gouged a track in the skin of her shoulder. Buffy raised her foot and jabbed at the thing's gut, but that didn't phase it.
Sonya snapped into action and fired her crossbow, but the creature rolled at just that instant, and the bolt missed.
Scrambling for another bolt, Sonya hissed, "Nicole! A little help here..."
Nicole didn't reply. She seemed frozen, staring at the creature with her arms outstretched.
Then Sonya found another bolt, loaded and fired again. This time the bolt hit the thing in the leg. The strange vampire yelled and hissed in pain. Buffy used it's moment of distraction to kick it again -- in it's injured leg. Then she shoved with all her might and the thing went flying backwards. It landed on the concrete floor several feet away, and immediately it was struggling to its feet and moved toward them again on all fours. Sonya fired another bolt. It would have gone into the thing's heart, if it hadn't flattened itself to the ground.
Suddenly, Nicole screamed, and the creature burst into flames. Buffy and Sonya froze, their eyes glued to the grisly spectacle. It burned for a second, evil howls echoing in their ears. And then the fire took over completely, and the creature vanished in a huge burst of flame, turning into a pile of blackened ash.
After a second, Buffy said quietly, "It must've been some kind of vampire if fire can do *that* to it."
"It was a feral vampire. If a vampire doesn't find its first meal soon enough, it can go totally animal. It depends somewhat on the personality of the human that becomes the vampire -- if the person had access to their animalistic tendencies which can be amplified by the demon and the hunger -- so it doesn't happen often, but once a vampire goes feral, it's nearly irreversible. Even if it feeds, it will still be animalistic."
Sonya and Buffy stared at Nicole.
"How do you know that?" Sonya asked.
"I'm Watcher trained and educated," Nicole replied. "Our team doesn't have the luxury of a full-time Watcher. We have to know enough to figure out what we're dealing with ourselves."
"Those were some impressive pyrotechnics," Buffy said, giving the red head an approving look.
Nicole accepted the compliment with a nod. "And you two have some impressive skills as well."
"If I could learn to aim better," Sonya remarked bitterly.
"You did fine," Buffy assured her.
"I only hit it once!" Sonya cried angrily.
"You're always your own worst critic," Buffy said. "That thing was fast. And strong. And a good dodger."
"And after being the Slayer, I'd imagine it would be hard to get used to firing without the help of your powers," Nicole added.
Sonya looked at the new girl, trying to discern if there was an insult behind the comment, but she couldn't find one. "Well, I'm not happy about it, but thanks for trying."
"You're never happy about it, but I know you're good, so that's all that matters." Buffy slung an arm around Sonya's shoulders, and started them all walking out of the factory. "Now, let's get out of here. We've still got a graveyard or two to deal with."
As they stepped out into the warm nighttime air, Nicole looked at the two Sunnydale veterans and asked, "How many cemeteries are there here anyway?"
"Thirteen," Buffy answered quickly.
"Each with it's on distinct personality," Sonya added. "And don't forget that new one on the east side of town that's set to open in, what, six months?"
"Isn't that a bit excessive for one small town?" Nicole replied with a small frown.
Buffy shook her head. "Not when that small town sits on a Hellmouth."
A little later, when they were patrolling through the nearest cemetery, Buffy motioned for Sonya to go on ahead and stayed behind to talk to Nicole.
"Thanks for what you did back there," Buffy said sincerely. "You saved us."
Nicole blushed a little at the compliment. "You and Sonya would have gotten him eventually. All I did was end things more quickly. I just wish I hadn't frozen up for a minute -- I could have fried him before he jumped you."
"Your talent would come in really handy fighting vampires on a regular basis," Buffy remarked in a casual tone. "Do you know what the Council has in store for you once we get back from our trip?"
"We don't get to know that far in advance," Nicole said. Her pale skin glowed luminously in the silvery moonlight.
"Well, I can't say anything about the guys because I don't know them, and I won't say anything else to you about Faith," Buffy said with a smile, "but if you wanted to stay on in Sunnydale after we get back, I'm sure Giles would approve. A pyrotechnic is a great defense against vampires."
Nicole gave Buffy a sharp glance. "You think Giles is coming back?"
Buffy frowned. "Why wouldn't he? I mean, he did lie to the Council, but it was all for a good cause. Sonya's life is important. They have to see that, right?" Nicole's expression didn't reassure the Slayer. "Have you heard something, Nicole?"
The other girl shook her head. "I've heard nothing. I just know the Council. They don't brook betrayal well, Buffy, no matter the cause." Nicole swallowed nervously, and forced a smile. "But maybe you are right. Perhaps there's nothing to worry about."
"Or perhaps I'm not worried enough," Buffy mumbled under her breath.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In the living room of the condo, Faith and Angel eyed one another warily. Faith looked tense. Angel guessed she anticipated another attack. Not that he blamed her after those she'd endured thus far. He was tempted to fulfill her expectations, but he restrained himself.
"So," Angel said aloud, not voicing any of his thoughts.
"So..." Faith replied, placing her hands on her black spandex-clad hips.
"Any thoughts on how we should proceed?" Angel sat down on the couch, pretending to be perfectly at ease. With this girl he couldn't let her have any advantage.
"I don't suppose that you're going to step back and let me take charge of things," Faith said sarcastically. She straddled the arm of the couch and stared at him with snapping dark eyes.
"Not a chance," Angel replied, leaning forward.
"Didn't think so." Faith studied him for a moment, and then she was all business. "I think Rio should work with your witches. He's well-trained, but he's the newest member of the team, so he'll benefit from time with those who have more combat experience."
Angel nodded. "Sounds workable. I'm sure Ms. Calendar and Amy will be glad for the help. Of course, they usually stay behind during missions. They are the researchers and the spell casters, not the front lines."
"Agreed," Faith said. She seemed a bit surprised that the word actually came out of her mouth regarding the two teams. "Where's the headquarters?"
"Usually we use the Sunnydale High School library," Angel told her, "but it's locked up tight for the break. We can get in if we need to, but Giles and I thought this condo would make the best headquarters. We've all got keys. It has a good quantity of books and resources, and no one will get suspicious of people traipsing through the school."
"What about patrols?" Faith asked. "We generally break up into teams of two to cover more ground."
"And you still have backup," Angel surmised.
"Nicole and Terrance make a good team," Faith continued as if he hadn't even spoken. Angel flashed her a dark look, but listened. "That's the way we usually break things down -- Nicole and Terrance and me and Rio."
"Sounds fine, except for one thing," Angel inserted, talking loudly enough to ride right over her strident tones. She closed her mouth and listened, but obviously wasn't too happy about it. Angel continued, "If Rio is with the girls at headquarters, that leaves you and I... together."
"Think you can handle it?" Faith challenged.
"I'll be fine," Angel asserted. "I was just worried about you. You don't seem the type to be able to trust a vampire."
"Maybe that's why I want you on my team." Faith tucked a strand of shiny, brown hair behind her ear and then crossed her arms over her chest. "So you stay where I can watch you."
"Seeing as I don't trust you farther than I can throw you, I'll agree to this," Angel said. He didn't want to be stuck with her, but he didn't want to wonder what plots she was unfolding elsewhere either. "If you think you can keep up with me..."
"I can keep up with anyone." Faith stood and walked over until she was right up in Angel's face. She enunciated each word with a poke to his chest. "Especially you."
Angel reached up, grabbed her hand, and in one swift movement he was standing with her arm pinioned behind her back. "I wouldn't be so sure of that."
To his surprise, Faith laughed. "You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" Her hand behind her back twitched, and before Angel realized it, she had gouged his skin with her fingernails. The pain shocked him into letting her go, though his undead flesh began to knit itself back together almost instantly.
When he looked up, Faith had vaulted over the couch and out of his reach. He said, "You are, too."
"Don't I know it." Her smile shone with self-satisfaction.
Privately, Angel vowed that next time Faith would not win, but now was not the time for such things. Just then the door opened to reveal Sonya and Nicole, both looking a little the worse for wear.
"What happened?" Angel asked Sonya quickly. His eyes clamped on to the open door, but no one else was out there.
Following his glance, Sonya said, "I dropped Buffy off at home before we came back here. I would have dropped Nicole at her motel, but she insisted on coming back here, in case *she* was still here." Faith and Sonya exchanged a dark look, but neither was up to following through with the implied threat at the moment.
"Nicole," Faith said, "report."
"It was mostly quiet," Nicole said in her cultured voice. Angel noted the hint of French in the rolls of her "r's" and the pronunciation of some of her vowels -- but it was only enough to give her a mysterious air, not enough to impede understanding. She continued, "I learned the location of all the graveyards and several other places of frequent vampire activity."
"Something else happened," Faith said. "A full report, Nicole, now."
"There was a feral vampire. It jumped us, but we killed it." Nicole glanced at Faith to see if she wanted more details.
"A feral vampire!" Angel exclaimed. "I haven't seen one of those in years."
"Well, you know Sunnydale," Sonya said sarcastically, "if the demon is at all possible, it will find its way here." Then she looked up at Angel in surprise, belatedly realizing what he had said. "You knew about them?"
"Doesn't everyone?" Angel replied.
"I didn't!" Sonya exclaimed. "Buffy didn't."
"Some Slayer," Faith muttered. "Even *I* knew that."
"Be fair, Faith," Nicole inserted. "We *have* to know. We don't have Watchers to do that for us." Sonya and Angel both glanced at the girl in surprise for her defense of Buffy.
"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" Faith asked.
Sonya stepped toward Faith. Faith stiffened her spine and readied herself for more action. "Wanna take another swing at me?"
Sensing the deterioration of the situation, Angel stepped in between the two girls. He grabbed Faith by one arm and Nicole by the other. "All right, girls, let's get out of here and let Giles and Sonya have their home back." Nicole followed along willingly, but Faith he had to tug fairly hard to get her to move. Sonya followed them to the door.
Once they were over the threshold, she called, "Bye-bye, now. Don't let any monsters get you while we're gone."
"Thanks, Son, really," Angel said dryly, but he wasn't really offended. That's just how they were together.
Nicole just went on her way without responding.
Faith, on the other hand, gave Sonya a saccharine-sweet smile and replied, "Have fun in little, old England, my dear. I'll see you when you get back, and we can finish what we started. If you come back, that is."
Sonya looked puzzled, but she didn't give in to the temptation. Instead she just slammed the door in their faces. Faith ripped her arm out of Angel's grip and motioned to Nicole.
"C'mon. Let's go. The guys are waiting for us back at the hotel."
"I'll meet you here after sundown tomorrow?" Angel called after her.
"Sure, whatever," Faith tossed back over her shoulder. "Let's just hope no bad things come out during the day, while you're incapacitated."
"If they do, I'm sure you can handle them all by your bitty, little self," Angel replied with a sneer. Once the words were out of his mouth, he realized how ridiculous he sounded. He opened his mouth to say as much, but one glance at Faith's retreating figure stopped him.
"G'night, Angel," Faith responded cattily. "Don't let the sunbeams bite."
Angel watched her walk away, restraining any more comebacks. They could do that all night, and he was sure they would continue the witty repartee throughout the days to come. (What a hellion) Angel thought, shaking his head. (And I get stuck dealing with her. Great.) Looking up at her back, which was facing him, a wry smile twisted his lips. (Her only saving grace is that she's not bad to look at while you're fighting with her. Nice ass -- too bad it's her best feature.)
Still shaking his head, now because of his thoughts rather than the situation, Angel turned the other direction and headed for home.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
After the meeting, Xander went home. Emotionally exhausted, he fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He didn't move until the beeping of his alarm woke him up, very reluctantly, at seven thirty the next morning. Groaning, he rubbed his scratchy eyes and stretched.
"Turn that damn thing off, boy!" his dad bellowed from the master bedroom down the hall.
"Yeah, yeah!" Xander muttered, switching the alarm clock off. To himself, he grumbled, "It's WAY too early for this," he muttered. "Neither Giles nor the airport should expect me to show up this early after what I went through yesterday."
He stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom for a shower. That was the only thing that would wake him up this morning. He randomly twisted the knobs in the shower, waited a few second and then stepped in. The blast of cold water that hit him in the face woke him up completely! Xander had to bite his tongue so as not to yell and wake his father up again. That wouldn't be pretty. Leaning down, he twisted the knobs for more hot water. None came.
"Dad!" Xander moaned between chattering teeth. "You promised to get the hot water heater fixed so it would stop doing this." Quickly, he began to shampoo and lather up his body. "So much for promises. I should have known better."
A few minutes later, a cleaner, bluer and much more awake Xander was in his room throwing stuff into a duffel bag. In his head, he could hear Giles remonstrating, "Xander, Xander, you should have done that last night."
"Well, I would have," Xander mumbled to the phantom Giles, "if you hadn't summoned me for the so-called *emergency* meeting." Seeing the navy blue folder the Watcher had given him on the floor -- it was sticking out from underneath his bed, but how it had gotten there, Xander had no clue -- he picked it up and leafed through it. His ticket and everything else was in place. He doubled checked that he had his passport, and found it in the side pocket of his carry-on. Squinting at the "what to pack" list, Xander compared it to the rumpled clothing and junk laying scattered on his bed. His eyes darted to the clock. Eight fifteen.
"I'm going to be late. I'm going to be late..." The muttered phrase became his mantra as Xander clumsily folded clothes and stuffed them in the duffel bag.
"What are you doing, Alexander?"
Xander looked up to see his mother standing in the doorway wearing a red and white striped robe and a confused expression. A yellowed bruise colored her right cheek. Xander winced inwardly, as he did every time he saw marks like that on her. But he hadn't been here to protect her. He'd been out trying to save the world. He tried to tell himself that it was more important to save the world, but it never made him feel any better. Xander couldn't wait to be gone from this house. Forever would be good, but a week was a nice start. If only he could take his mother with him -- not to England, but when he finally left for good -- but she wouldn't go. He knew because he'd asked. When he was twelve, he'd told his mother that the two of them should leave and never come back. His mother had refused because of her 'love' for his father.
Trying to keep the emotions inside him from showing on his face, he answered, "I'm packing for my Spring Break trip. Remember, Mom, I'm going to England with Mr. Giles and some kids from school?"
She stared at him blankly. "Are you? How did we pay for the ticket?"
"I told you." Xander sighed, and went through the story again. He didn't know why he bothered. She never remembered anything about him. He was lucky if she remembered how old he was, much less his daily plans. "Mr. Giles got us discount rates because we're students. We're going with kids from other high schools on one of those pre-arranged tour things. I paid for the rest of it out of the money I saved from my summer job at the hot dog joint. Remember now?"
"Oh, yes, I suppose so." She moved into the room and surveyed his packing efforts. "Alexander, honey, you're not doing a very good job of this. By the time you get off the plane all this stuff will be wrinkled beyond repair."
"I know, but I'm running late." Xander looked helplessly at the mess on the bed.
Looking more maternal than she had in a long time, his mom bustled into the room and started folding clothes with an expert hand. "How long until you have to leave?"
Xander looked at the clock again. "I've got to leave here in about twenty-five minutes to be at the school by nine for my ride to the airport."
"We haven't much time." She shook all the clothes he'd already put in the duffel bag -- luckily he'd thought ahead enough to wash them two days earlier -- and started re-folding them. "I'll do this, and you take care of your carry-on. Don't forget shampoo and a toothbrush."
Reverting to childhood habits, Xander mumbled, "Yes, Mom," and the hustled into the bathroom to get the requested items. "This is like the time she got me ready to go to camp the summer after fifth grade." But secretly, he liked it.
Twenty minutes later, all his clothes were neatly folded and packed. He had everything from casual wear in case they got to do any sight-seeing to nice clothes to wear in meetings with the Council. He also had remembered all his toiletries, and even a book, a deck of cards and a notebook and pen for diversion on the plane. And thanks to his day job last summer, he even had extra cash for whatever expenses came his way.
His mother bustled out of the room and came back with a small object in a cloth bag. "Here take this."
"What is it?"
"My travel iron." She smiled a little sadly. "I bought it for that trip your father and I were supposed to take to Niagara Falls. It's never been used. Maybe you can get some use out of it."
"Thanks, Mom." He leaned down to give her a quick hug. "Don't miss me too much."
"How long will you be gone?"
Xander sighed. "A week, Mom. All of Spring Break." He started down the stairs, and she followed a pace or two behind. When he got to the front door, he reached back and gave her another fierce hug. "Be really careful, Mom, OK. If anything... happens, promise me you'll go to Uncle Rory's."
She darted a nervous glance at the staircase. "What would happen, dear? You're the one who should be careful. Traipsing around a foreign country. France, did you say?"
"England," Xander corrected her. "England, Mom. Do you want the number of the place I'm staying, just in case?"
"There's no need," she said, clutching the neck of her robe. "Bye, Alexander."
"Good bye, Mom." Sad that the moment of mother/son closeness was gone -- though he'd expected as much -- Xander opened the door and stepped out on the porch.
As he hoisted his bags onto his shoulders, she walked to the threshold to ask a question. "Is that nice girl going along with you?"
"Which girl, Mom, Buffy? I told you that she and I broke up."
"No, no, not her. That other girl. The really pretty one with the quiet ways and the sweet smile. Willow! That's her name. I always liked Willow. How is she, anyway? I haven't seen her around much lately." His mother looked up at him from her confused, watery blue eyes.
Xander had to fight back a sudden surge of tears. Of all the times for his mother to try and rekindle her interest in his life! He didn't know if her memory lapses about him were due to his father's beatings, her ever-growing taste for alcohol to drown out her pain, a lack of maternal feelings or just a lack of love for him completely. Over the years, beaten down by her lack of response and refusals to leave his father, Xander had thrown himself into whatever life he could find that would keep him out of the house as long as possible. It was funny how the horrible could become the usual, and you didn't even notice it.
Getting himself under control, Xander answered, "No, Mom. Willow's not going. She died two years ago, remember? The same time as Jesse." He looked into her eyes and watched as the clouded confusion crept back in. A moment later and the blank stare was back. "Good bye, Mom. I'll see you when I get back."
"Good bye," she called, waving, but the look on her face made him wonder if she still remembered where he was going.
Xander turned his back on the situation before the familiar, frustrating feelings of helplessness overcame him, and he got in the jeep and drove off with a squeal. He consciously did not look in the rearview mirror to see if she was still out there, or if she'd vanished back into the house.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Buffy and Joyce were the first people to reach the library that morning, mostly due to Joyce's prodding. Exhausted from her night of emotional ups and downs, physical exertion and surprises, she could have slept all day. But Joyce had woken her up at seven o'clock with a cheery, "Rise and shine, sweetie! I know you didn't get in until three, but that doesn't mean we can be late. Get up and get ready, and you can sleep more on the plane." They pulled into the library parking lot at five till nine.
Soon after, Oz's familiar van drove up with Sonya behind the wheel. When she screeched to a halt, a green-faced Giles got shakily out of the passenger seat. He walked over to Joyce and asked, "Would you mind if I rode with you to the airport?"
"That's fine," Joyce assured him. They had planned to take Joyce and Oz's vehicles for the drive to LAX. Theoretically, the drive should only take them two hours, but if traffic was bad, the California natives knew it could take them as much as four hours to make it through the maze of LA highways. That's why they were leaving at nine, and their plane didn't leave until two in the afternoon.
A few seconds later, Xander pulled up in his jeep. He grabbed his bags, and threw them in the back of Oz's van.
"Where do you want me?" he asked. He had a smile on his face, but Buffy could tell that something was bothering him. He had the tight look around his eyes that he got sometimes. When they'd been dating, she'd always wondered what caused that, but he would never tell her. She sighed. If only things were better between them, she'd try asking again. But things were worse now than before. And so confusing. She didn't know what to do.
Joyce took it upon herself to answer his question. "Well, I'm driving my minivan, and Sonya is driving Oz's van. I think Oz is comfortable in there, so he's not moving, and Giles and Buffy are riding with me. You can go wherever you want. There's more than enough room in both vehicles."
Buffy watched Xander glance between the two vans. She knew exactly what he was thinking. He could ride in the passenger seat of Oz's van, next to Sonya, whom he still was barely speaking to. Or he could ride in her mother's van, in the backseat next to her and feel awkward about their situation. What a horrible choice for him.
Abruptly, Buffy said, "Mom, do you mind if I ride with Sonya?"
"No, not if you want to," Joyce replied amiably. "We're all going to the same place."
"All right, everybody," Buffy said, "let's get out of here." As she made her way over to the zebra stripped van, Xander touched her shoulder.
"Thanks," he said softly.
"It's OK," Buffy replied. When he looked at her that way, she couldn't help but smile at him a little. Part of her wanted to reach out and hug him. The unexplained sadness in his eyes hurt her soul. But she settled for just touching his hand. He opened the van door for her. Buffy got in, and then looked at him.
He looked straight back at her. "Do you think maybe we can talk for a little while on the plane?"
Divided on this issue, as always, part of Buffy wanted to yell, "No, no, no! No more torture!" But the other part of her wanted that above all else. After a short pause, she said, "Yeah. We could do that."
"Good." Then he shut her door, and got in the backseat of her mother's van. A few minutes later, and the two vans pulled out of the parking lot on the way to the airport.