Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THIS SONG!!!!! It's property of Celine Dion! And
it's strongly suggested that you listen to the song while reading this
chapter. Harry and Hermione get together at last!
Wanted: Love Ch10: All by Myself
Harry stood at the entrance to the Great Hall. They all looked so happy and carefree. He didn't belong there, even if he wanted to. What he would give for things to go back to the way they were before he found out a wizard. Back when he was young and didn't need anyone. But he could never go back, not now that he knew what it was like to have friends. Harry watched Ron and Lavender dance around in circles. Both were laughing and looked like they were having a great time. He remembered when he used to pretend he had a friend. It was the only thing he could do to get some kind of love out of his life, even if it meant getting beaten doubly for it by his uncle for 'not being normal.' His eyes wandered around the room, they would all be fine without him. He just hoped they would understand. He couldn't go on. Not with the guilt of knowing he brought Voldemort back. Not with the knowledge that in less than twenty four hours the entire wizarding world would know the truth about his time at his uncle's house. All those chances to kill himself and he had always chickened out.
'But not this time.' he thought to himself. He was tired of being so alone all the time. No one truly understood him and no one ever would. Harry had come to grips with this but the thought of being all by himself for the rest of his life was too much to bear. He was going to rid himself of that pain tonight.
When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
Livin' alone
I think of all the friends I've known
When I dial the telephone
Nobody's home
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
Harry walked out of Hogwarts with a determined look on his face, even if it wasn't exactly the way he felt. Underneath his outer appearance his heart was racing. He was going to hide under the invisibility cloak and then kill himself. No one ever had to know what happened to him. They could just think that Voldemort had gotten to him. That was fine. But he wouldn't let them know the truth. He couldn't let them know that he was, in fact, too scared to go on with his life. No, it was better to let them think he went down fighting to the death with the Dark Lord himself. Walking swiftly across the grounds of Hogwarts, Harry began to think about what his friends would do when they found him gone. They would probably search for him for a few days, figure that he was dead, and go back to life as normal. Harry let a tear slip down his cheek at the thought of him being but a mere memory. No one had ever truly loved him. Voldemort had been correct about that.
Hard to be sure
Sometimes I feel so insecure
And loves so distant and obscure
Remains the cure
Hermione: Hermione followed Harry out of the castle. He seemed very distraught. And though she wasn't exactly sure why she felt so nervous, she definitely had a feeling that something was seriously wrong. Harry finally stopped at the edge of the Forbidden Forest and Hermione was not but ten feet from him and couldn't understand why he hadn't noticed her. He tossed something to the ground.
'What is it? The invisibility cloak? What's going on?' Hermione asked herself. Harry was still for a minute before reaching into his robe's pocket and pulling out his wand.
'What is he doing?' Hermione mentally asked but quickly found all the questions erased from her mind, however, as he pointed it to his chest and started to utter the two worst words she ever heard. Without thinking, Hermione started running as quickly as she could to him.
"Harry, no!" she yelled as she knocked him to the ground.
Harry: By the time he reached the edge of the Forbidden Forest Harry had come to the conclusion that this, without a doubt, was the best thing for everyone. But sighing, Harry threw the cloak to the ground. He couldn't let them not know that he was dead. Just another example of how weak he had become. Perhaps they would still think he went down fighting Voldemort. After all he was going to kill himself the same way Voldemort would.
Harry gulped, took one last shaking breath and pointed his wand at his heart, "Avada Keda---"
"Harry, no!" shouted a voice as something knocked him to the ground and the wand out of his hand.
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
All by myself
Don't wanna live
All by myself
Anymore
"Hermione!? What are you doing!?" asked Harry quite upset as he sat up. He had almost done it and now he wasn't sure if he'd be able to work up the courage again.
"Me!? Harry why are you trying to kill yourself!?" shrieked Hermione. Harry narrowed his eyes and looked to the side.
"It's none of your business. You wouldn't understand." he said quietly.
"Harry, what's wrong? You've been acting so weird lately." said Hermione. Harry didn't say anything, for fear of breaking down.
"Harry?" asked Hermione. He still didn't respond and Hermione moved in front of him and grabbed one of his hands.
"You can tell me, Harry." she said comfortingly. Harry yanked his hand away from her and stood up.
"Just leave me alone." he said as he picked up his wand and pointed it at his chest again. Hermione jumped up and was literally fighting Harry to get the wand away from him.
"Harry! Stop it!" she pleaded with him as she tried to get the wand from his grasp.
"Hermione, go away! It's none of your business what I do to myself!" said Harry, forcefully pushing her away and to the ground.
Pointing it at his chest, he was about to say the words when something stopped him. Hermione was staring up at him with tears flowing out of her eyes and a look of deep pain emanating from her facial expression; she didn't even seem to notice the cut on her cheek that was leaking blood. He looked at her thoughtfully for a moment but couldn't seem to place the emotion.
"Harry, please don't do this. Please!" Hermione said with utter desperation.
"Why not? Why shouldn't I Hermione!? My life's been screwed over a dozen times at least! Why shouldn't I just get it over with!?" Harry asked, feeling tears begin to creep up into the corners of his eyes.
"Harry you just can't! Everyone loves you too much!" exclaimed Hermione. Harry let his arm drop to the side and the wand slipped out of his hand. Did she just say love? People loved him? When had that happened?
"Me?. . .But. . .no one's ever loved me before."
When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
As she heard this, Hermione couldn't think of a single thing appropriate to say. Harry looked more confused than she thought it was possible for any one person to look as he sank to the ground.
"Harry?" she asked. Harry seemed not to hear her as he kept muttering nonsense under his breath. Cautiously, Hermione stood up and walked over to him then bent down in front of him. Putting a hand on his shoulder, she drew him into a hug. At first, it was one sided but after a few seconds, he hugged her back. The next thing she heard was the distinct sound of Harry's defenses breaking down and his back ups trying to prevent him from crying.
"It's okay, Harry. You can cry." She said gently running her hand over the back of his head. At this, he seemed to be trying even more not to cry but it was like trying to keep an ice cube frozen on a frying pan and eventually he broke down into full fledged sobs. It took him ten minutes, but he was finally able to control his emotions and pulled away looking rather embarrassed for so openly displaying his emotions.
"I'm sorry." he whispered.
"For what?" asked Hermione.
"Everything. I just don't know what to do anymore." said Harry.
"About what?" asked Hermione.
"You wouldn't understand. No one would." said Harry dejectedly.
"Harry, talk to me. Please, you can tell me anything, I promise." said Hermione.
". . .I. . .don't want to be alone anymore." said Harry looking down.
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
All by myself
Don't wanna live
Oh
Don't wanna live
By myself, by myself
Anymore
"Harry, look at me." said Hermione, cupping his face in her hands and staring deeply into his eyes. Oh how she loved those eyes. Every time she looked at him they were always the thing that captivated her. She felt as though she could do nothing else but stare into them for the rest of her life and be perfectly content.
"Harry, you've never been alone. Everyone cares for you. Don't you see that?" Hermione asked.
Harry lowered his eyes, "But they shouldn't! It's my freakin' fault that Voldemort came back! I'm responsible for everyone who dies!" With that he removed his head from Hermione's gentle grasp.
"Harry! It's not your fault and you know it! Everyone knows it's not your fault! We love you no matter what, don't you go thinking otherwise!" said Hermione.
"Even you?" asked Harry, barely suppressing more tears.
Hermione blinked, "What? Of course I love you! Sometimes. . .sometimes even more than I should." She finished softly, not believing she had actually said that, so that Harry could barely understand what she had said.
Disbelieving his ears he looked up at her, "What? But what about Krum?"
"We broke up two weeks before school started." said Hermione. There was a moment of silence between the two then before anyone knew what was happening, Hermione had grabbed Harry by the head and pushed her lips against his.
By myself
Anymore
Oh
All by myself
Don't wanna live
When she pulled away Harry had a look of complete shock on his face. He blinked a couple times but the look didn't go away. Hermione blushed deeply and looked away.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I don't know what came over me!" she exclaimed. Harry smiled slightly.
"Hermione." he said as Hermione was still going through her apologies. Hermione immediately stopped her talking and looked at him nervously. Harry's smile broadened and as he pulled her into him and kissed her. Hermione was shocked at first but then relaxed into it. They sat there, lip locked, for a long moment then broke apart for lack of air. Hermione blushed and looked down.
Harry lifted her chin up and looked into her eyes, "Thanks."
I never, never, never
Needed anyone
Author's Note: And so they're finally together! How was it? Harry wasn't too out of character was he? I don't think so but I need to know what you all think. Harry and Hermione are so cute together, aren't they? Just like PB&J! Yum! Sorry, on a sugar high right now! You know, this song is what gave me the entire idea for this story! Amazing isn't it? Well, next chapter something VERY big happens! Can you guess? I think you can, well give me a review and I'll start working on the next chapter!
Kristi: Thanks for the review! I'm so pleased to here so many nice things from everyone!
Carrierk818: Yeah, well, I was gonna but I got home late from a "dinner" party and my mom wouldn't let me on! I did give you the 2 chapters, though! So, go suck an egg (I know, real dumb but my friends came up w/it and now its habit!)!
Malexandria: I know, I wanted to make him paralyzed but you don't know my neighbor. VERY big! Trust me, you don't want to tick him off! But thanks for the compliment! And as to your other question about the Dursleys. . . .::grins maliciously:: you'll see. . .in next chapter!
Celebony: Wow, this is likely the longest review I've gotten so far. . .Okay. I'll start at the beginning. Ron and Hermione are gonna find out but I'm not telling you how b/c it happens this chapter so just read and find out. Second, ah, yes, the infamous fighting scene. Well, what would you do? I simply *couldn't* let the chance to beat some manners into those rotten Slytherins slip by, could I? Really? I thought the first chapter might have turned people off. . .guess not. And don't worry, I'll try to work in more flashbacks as I go on. . .there will be quite a few this chapter. And finally, one of the 4 elite, huh? Well, I'm honored! Thanks for the awesome review!
Wanted: Love Ch10: All by Myself
Harry stood at the entrance to the Great Hall. They all looked so happy and carefree. He didn't belong there, even if he wanted to. What he would give for things to go back to the way they were before he found out a wizard. Back when he was young and didn't need anyone. But he could never go back, not now that he knew what it was like to have friends. Harry watched Ron and Lavender dance around in circles. Both were laughing and looked like they were having a great time. He remembered when he used to pretend he had a friend. It was the only thing he could do to get some kind of love out of his life, even if it meant getting beaten doubly for it by his uncle for 'not being normal.' His eyes wandered around the room, they would all be fine without him. He just hoped they would understand. He couldn't go on. Not with the guilt of knowing he brought Voldemort back. Not with the knowledge that in less than twenty four hours the entire wizarding world would know the truth about his time at his uncle's house. All those chances to kill himself and he had always chickened out.
'But not this time.' he thought to himself. He was tired of being so alone all the time. No one truly understood him and no one ever would. Harry had come to grips with this but the thought of being all by himself for the rest of his life was too much to bear. He was going to rid himself of that pain tonight.
When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
Livin' alone
I think of all the friends I've known
When I dial the telephone
Nobody's home
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
Harry walked out of Hogwarts with a determined look on his face, even if it wasn't exactly the way he felt. Underneath his outer appearance his heart was racing. He was going to hide under the invisibility cloak and then kill himself. No one ever had to know what happened to him. They could just think that Voldemort had gotten to him. That was fine. But he wouldn't let them know the truth. He couldn't let them know that he was, in fact, too scared to go on with his life. No, it was better to let them think he went down fighting to the death with the Dark Lord himself. Walking swiftly across the grounds of Hogwarts, Harry began to think about what his friends would do when they found him gone. They would probably search for him for a few days, figure that he was dead, and go back to life as normal. Harry let a tear slip down his cheek at the thought of him being but a mere memory. No one had ever truly loved him. Voldemort had been correct about that.
Hard to be sure
Sometimes I feel so insecure
And loves so distant and obscure
Remains the cure
Hermione: Hermione followed Harry out of the castle. He seemed very distraught. And though she wasn't exactly sure why she felt so nervous, she definitely had a feeling that something was seriously wrong. Harry finally stopped at the edge of the Forbidden Forest and Hermione was not but ten feet from him and couldn't understand why he hadn't noticed her. He tossed something to the ground.
'What is it? The invisibility cloak? What's going on?' Hermione asked herself. Harry was still for a minute before reaching into his robe's pocket and pulling out his wand.
'What is he doing?' Hermione mentally asked but quickly found all the questions erased from her mind, however, as he pointed it to his chest and started to utter the two worst words she ever heard. Without thinking, Hermione started running as quickly as she could to him.
"Harry, no!" she yelled as she knocked him to the ground.
Harry: By the time he reached the edge of the Forbidden Forest Harry had come to the conclusion that this, without a doubt, was the best thing for everyone. But sighing, Harry threw the cloak to the ground. He couldn't let them not know that he was dead. Just another example of how weak he had become. Perhaps they would still think he went down fighting Voldemort. After all he was going to kill himself the same way Voldemort would.
Harry gulped, took one last shaking breath and pointed his wand at his heart, "Avada Keda---"
"Harry, no!" shouted a voice as something knocked him to the ground and the wand out of his hand.
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
All by myself
Don't wanna live
All by myself
Anymore
"Hermione!? What are you doing!?" asked Harry quite upset as he sat up. He had almost done it and now he wasn't sure if he'd be able to work up the courage again.
"Me!? Harry why are you trying to kill yourself!?" shrieked Hermione. Harry narrowed his eyes and looked to the side.
"It's none of your business. You wouldn't understand." he said quietly.
"Harry, what's wrong? You've been acting so weird lately." said Hermione. Harry didn't say anything, for fear of breaking down.
"Harry?" asked Hermione. He still didn't respond and Hermione moved in front of him and grabbed one of his hands.
"You can tell me, Harry." she said comfortingly. Harry yanked his hand away from her and stood up.
"Just leave me alone." he said as he picked up his wand and pointed it at his chest again. Hermione jumped up and was literally fighting Harry to get the wand away from him.
"Harry! Stop it!" she pleaded with him as she tried to get the wand from his grasp.
"Hermione, go away! It's none of your business what I do to myself!" said Harry, forcefully pushing her away and to the ground.
Pointing it at his chest, he was about to say the words when something stopped him. Hermione was staring up at him with tears flowing out of her eyes and a look of deep pain emanating from her facial expression; she didn't even seem to notice the cut on her cheek that was leaking blood. He looked at her thoughtfully for a moment but couldn't seem to place the emotion.
"Harry, please don't do this. Please!" Hermione said with utter desperation.
"Why not? Why shouldn't I Hermione!? My life's been screwed over a dozen times at least! Why shouldn't I just get it over with!?" Harry asked, feeling tears begin to creep up into the corners of his eyes.
"Harry you just can't! Everyone loves you too much!" exclaimed Hermione. Harry let his arm drop to the side and the wand slipped out of his hand. Did she just say love? People loved him? When had that happened?
"Me?. . .But. . .no one's ever loved me before."
When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
As she heard this, Hermione couldn't think of a single thing appropriate to say. Harry looked more confused than she thought it was possible for any one person to look as he sank to the ground.
"Harry?" she asked. Harry seemed not to hear her as he kept muttering nonsense under his breath. Cautiously, Hermione stood up and walked over to him then bent down in front of him. Putting a hand on his shoulder, she drew him into a hug. At first, it was one sided but after a few seconds, he hugged her back. The next thing she heard was the distinct sound of Harry's defenses breaking down and his back ups trying to prevent him from crying.
"It's okay, Harry. You can cry." She said gently running her hand over the back of his head. At this, he seemed to be trying even more not to cry but it was like trying to keep an ice cube frozen on a frying pan and eventually he broke down into full fledged sobs. It took him ten minutes, but he was finally able to control his emotions and pulled away looking rather embarrassed for so openly displaying his emotions.
"I'm sorry." he whispered.
"For what?" asked Hermione.
"Everything. I just don't know what to do anymore." said Harry.
"About what?" asked Hermione.
"You wouldn't understand. No one would." said Harry dejectedly.
"Harry, talk to me. Please, you can tell me anything, I promise." said Hermione.
". . .I. . .don't want to be alone anymore." said Harry looking down.
All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
Anymore
All by myself
Don't wanna live
Oh
Don't wanna live
By myself, by myself
Anymore
"Harry, look at me." said Hermione, cupping his face in her hands and staring deeply into his eyes. Oh how she loved those eyes. Every time she looked at him they were always the thing that captivated her. She felt as though she could do nothing else but stare into them for the rest of her life and be perfectly content.
"Harry, you've never been alone. Everyone cares for you. Don't you see that?" Hermione asked.
Harry lowered his eyes, "But they shouldn't! It's my freakin' fault that Voldemort came back! I'm responsible for everyone who dies!" With that he removed his head from Hermione's gentle grasp.
"Harry! It's not your fault and you know it! Everyone knows it's not your fault! We love you no matter what, don't you go thinking otherwise!" said Hermione.
"Even you?" asked Harry, barely suppressing more tears.
Hermione blinked, "What? Of course I love you! Sometimes. . .sometimes even more than I should." She finished softly, not believing she had actually said that, so that Harry could barely understand what she had said.
Disbelieving his ears he looked up at her, "What? But what about Krum?"
"We broke up two weeks before school started." said Hermione. There was a moment of silence between the two then before anyone knew what was happening, Hermione had grabbed Harry by the head and pushed her lips against his.
By myself
Anymore
Oh
All by myself
Don't wanna live
When she pulled away Harry had a look of complete shock on his face. He blinked a couple times but the look didn't go away. Hermione blushed deeply and looked away.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! I don't know what came over me!" she exclaimed. Harry smiled slightly.
"Hermione." he said as Hermione was still going through her apologies. Hermione immediately stopped her talking and looked at him nervously. Harry's smile broadened and as he pulled her into him and kissed her. Hermione was shocked at first but then relaxed into it. They sat there, lip locked, for a long moment then broke apart for lack of air. Hermione blushed and looked down.
Harry lifted her chin up and looked into her eyes, "Thanks."
I never, never, never
Needed anyone
Author's Note: And so they're finally together! How was it? Harry wasn't too out of character was he? I don't think so but I need to know what you all think. Harry and Hermione are so cute together, aren't they? Just like PB&J! Yum! Sorry, on a sugar high right now! You know, this song is what gave me the entire idea for this story! Amazing isn't it? Well, next chapter something VERY big happens! Can you guess? I think you can, well give me a review and I'll start working on the next chapter!
Kristi: Thanks for the review! I'm so pleased to here so many nice things from everyone!
Carrierk818: Yeah, well, I was gonna but I got home late from a "dinner" party and my mom wouldn't let me on! I did give you the 2 chapters, though! So, go suck an egg (I know, real dumb but my friends came up w/it and now its habit!)!
Malexandria: I know, I wanted to make him paralyzed but you don't know my neighbor. VERY big! Trust me, you don't want to tick him off! But thanks for the compliment! And as to your other question about the Dursleys. . . .::grins maliciously:: you'll see. . .in next chapter!
Celebony: Wow, this is likely the longest review I've gotten so far. . .Okay. I'll start at the beginning. Ron and Hermione are gonna find out but I'm not telling you how b/c it happens this chapter so just read and find out. Second, ah, yes, the infamous fighting scene. Well, what would you do? I simply *couldn't* let the chance to beat some manners into those rotten Slytherins slip by, could I? Really? I thought the first chapter might have turned people off. . .guess not. And don't worry, I'll try to work in more flashbacks as I go on. . .there will be quite a few this chapter. And finally, one of the 4 elite, huh? Well, I'm honored! Thanks for the awesome review!