After a restless night spent in my room (if It could be called a "room")
and the latest nightmare spent screaming from Spirit World Inc., I looked
out the window blankly.
My mind felt fuzzy and pressurized, like a balloon being squeezed. I remembered everything - and truly wished I hadn't said those things to my parents. They were too naïve, they would never understand. I should have accepted that first thing. Now they were probably certain that I was nuts - that my cheese was off my cracker. That I wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer. That my bananas had been peeled. That my brain was just a big huge coconut.
So, of course, I promptly began to cry. Luckily, I ended up falling asleep again, and didn't have any nightmares - just a happy dream spent with Haku. When I woke up once more, I felt better, and eventually got up and started pacing.
Rather sooner than expected, there was a knock on the door, and a woman came in.
"Miss Ogino?" she asked, giving me a tight smile. "I have somebody that you'll like to meet. His name is Mr. Kawa. All of the girls call him Yuki- chan, though," her smile became tighter, stretching over her lips. "He'll be your councilor. Come on, now, are you hungry? You must be."
"No," I muttered, hating this place. this... what was this? A jail? An asylum? "I had a big dinner last night, I'm not very hungry." Then, seeing the look on her face, I quickly added; "Yet."
Her tight smile became, if possible, tighter. "This way, then." She led me by the shoulders down a hallway and elevator, to a big room with a window in the hallway, so that one could see inside a desk, a TV, some games, and many, many different toys. A plate of cookies sat atop the desk, and behind the desk sat Mr. Kawa himself, it seemed. I was pushed inside (light classical music was playing) and sat down at the chair across from Mr. Kawa.
"This is Miss Ogino, Yuki-chan," the woman said, her smile genuine and hinted with a blush as she handed over a file - big thick yellow folder filled with papers - after he had turned off the music. Radio. Hmm. Interesting.
"Thank you, Nurse," Mr. Kawa replied, also smiling at her. She giggled (nervously) and left, closing the door firmly behind her.
Mr. Kawa smiled at me now, and I had a very un-Chihiro-like urge to scream myself hoarse at him and smack that fake smirk right off his face. "So, Miss Ogino, what did you do to get landed here?" he asked, voice soft as he rippled through the papers. I longed to see what Mr. Your-daughter-will-be- fine had written about me.
"I had an adventure and some dreams," I said flatly, suddenly realizing how hungry I really was.
There was an uncomfortable silence where he finished reading the papers, closed the file, and leaned back in his chair, placing it in a big file cabinet. Under 'O' for 'Ogino' no doubt.
"Hmm, I understand that you had a big adventure while moving here. Would you like to tell me about it?"
So, of course, I told him my adventure of everything, starting from when my new school had been pointed out to me and ended when we came at last to our new house. I didn't tell him how to get to the Spirit World. I didn't tell anybody - I couldn't let what happened to me happen to anybody else.
"I see," he said, placing his finger tips together. "And you say... you, love, this Mr. Haku?"
"Yes," I muttered, ducking my head as I felt a blush creep up my cheeks.
"And he is a river god, young man, and dragon all at the same time?"
"All wrapped up into one." Perfect being, I added mentally.
"Tell me more about your parents' reaction to this, their role during before and after your... adventure."
So I did.
"Ah-huh," he said, and I only just became realized that he was writing stuff down on a clipboard all this time. "Tell me about your dreams."
So I did. They were really - they had been more memories, really, that either ended in me waking up in the morning with a huge grin or at twelve at night screaming bloody murder. I even told him about the ones I had had when I had gotten here.
"I see," he murmured, and after a moment more of writing, he put his pencil down and smiled prettily at me.
I wanted to be sick.
"Miss Ogino," he started, "you have a condition - it's rare, but not relatively new. You're going to have a hard time wading through all of this reality and magical stuff, butt what I'm going to do is help you separate reality from fantasy so that you can go home to your mother and father safe and sound, better than before." He beamed. I scowled.
"It was real! I just told you, everything! It was all real, it seriously happened! It wasn't a dream, this isn't a lie! Just let me go home, I won't talk about it again, I promise, just let me go home." My shoulders slumped as tears polled in my lowered eyes and began to spill.
"You only think it was real," Mr. Kawa said. "Miss Ogino, you are terribly confused right now, mentally as well as emotionally. I'm going to get rid of that confusion, the staff and I, but we can't help you unless you accept our help."
I sighed, wiping my tears away. they hadn't worked.
Was I going to do? Just nod and say "Hai Yuki-sama" ever five minutes? It would probably get me out faster. Lying to myself, and going on and on about how they were right, I was wrong, that was how I would get home. "home" was back in Tokyo, not in that god forsaken town.
Still, saying that they - Haku - did not exist left a bad taste in my mouth just thinking of it - of betraying them. That's what it felt like.
Betrayal.
But what if... what if it all HAD been a dream?
No. my love for Haku was real.
"It was real," I said firmly through my teeth. "It IS real. I'm telling you the truth. It IS real. Haku IS real, and he loves me, and Baby, and Rin, and Kamajii, and Zeniiba and all of the others, they're my friends, and they're all real. It's the truth."
"I understand, Miss Ogino."
I could hear the disbelief in his voice.
"IT'S THE TRUTH!" I shrieked, jerking to my feet. The chair went out flying behind me, and a bouncy ball went sailing. "THEY'RE REAL, THE SPIRIT WORLD IS REAL, AND I WON'T LIE AND SAY IT ISN'T!" I set my jaw, breathing heavily. "It's real!" I cried again, and my ears were filled with a strange buzzing as Mr. Kawa pushed a button and spoke.
"IT'S THE TRUTH! IT'S REAL! THEY'RE ALL REAL!"
Doctors burst in, and held me kicking, struggling, screaming, crying, down, and I felt the pinch of a needle going into my arm. I screamed before I fell into darkness.
.
Another week passed in this manner.
.
My mind felt fuzzy and pressurized, like a balloon being squeezed. I remembered everything - and truly wished I hadn't said those things to my parents. They were too naïve, they would never understand. I should have accepted that first thing. Now they were probably certain that I was nuts - that my cheese was off my cracker. That I wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer. That my bananas had been peeled. That my brain was just a big huge coconut.
So, of course, I promptly began to cry. Luckily, I ended up falling asleep again, and didn't have any nightmares - just a happy dream spent with Haku. When I woke up once more, I felt better, and eventually got up and started pacing.
Rather sooner than expected, there was a knock on the door, and a woman came in.
"Miss Ogino?" she asked, giving me a tight smile. "I have somebody that you'll like to meet. His name is Mr. Kawa. All of the girls call him Yuki- chan, though," her smile became tighter, stretching over her lips. "He'll be your councilor. Come on, now, are you hungry? You must be."
"No," I muttered, hating this place. this... what was this? A jail? An asylum? "I had a big dinner last night, I'm not very hungry." Then, seeing the look on her face, I quickly added; "Yet."
Her tight smile became, if possible, tighter. "This way, then." She led me by the shoulders down a hallway and elevator, to a big room with a window in the hallway, so that one could see inside a desk, a TV, some games, and many, many different toys. A plate of cookies sat atop the desk, and behind the desk sat Mr. Kawa himself, it seemed. I was pushed inside (light classical music was playing) and sat down at the chair across from Mr. Kawa.
"This is Miss Ogino, Yuki-chan," the woman said, her smile genuine and hinted with a blush as she handed over a file - big thick yellow folder filled with papers - after he had turned off the music. Radio. Hmm. Interesting.
"Thank you, Nurse," Mr. Kawa replied, also smiling at her. She giggled (nervously) and left, closing the door firmly behind her.
Mr. Kawa smiled at me now, and I had a very un-Chihiro-like urge to scream myself hoarse at him and smack that fake smirk right off his face. "So, Miss Ogino, what did you do to get landed here?" he asked, voice soft as he rippled through the papers. I longed to see what Mr. Your-daughter-will-be- fine had written about me.
"I had an adventure and some dreams," I said flatly, suddenly realizing how hungry I really was.
There was an uncomfortable silence where he finished reading the papers, closed the file, and leaned back in his chair, placing it in a big file cabinet. Under 'O' for 'Ogino' no doubt.
"Hmm, I understand that you had a big adventure while moving here. Would you like to tell me about it?"
So, of course, I told him my adventure of everything, starting from when my new school had been pointed out to me and ended when we came at last to our new house. I didn't tell him how to get to the Spirit World. I didn't tell anybody - I couldn't let what happened to me happen to anybody else.
"I see," he said, placing his finger tips together. "And you say... you, love, this Mr. Haku?"
"Yes," I muttered, ducking my head as I felt a blush creep up my cheeks.
"And he is a river god, young man, and dragon all at the same time?"
"All wrapped up into one." Perfect being, I added mentally.
"Tell me more about your parents' reaction to this, their role during before and after your... adventure."
So I did.
"Ah-huh," he said, and I only just became realized that he was writing stuff down on a clipboard all this time. "Tell me about your dreams."
So I did. They were really - they had been more memories, really, that either ended in me waking up in the morning with a huge grin or at twelve at night screaming bloody murder. I even told him about the ones I had had when I had gotten here.
"I see," he murmured, and after a moment more of writing, he put his pencil down and smiled prettily at me.
I wanted to be sick.
"Miss Ogino," he started, "you have a condition - it's rare, but not relatively new. You're going to have a hard time wading through all of this reality and magical stuff, butt what I'm going to do is help you separate reality from fantasy so that you can go home to your mother and father safe and sound, better than before." He beamed. I scowled.
"It was real! I just told you, everything! It was all real, it seriously happened! It wasn't a dream, this isn't a lie! Just let me go home, I won't talk about it again, I promise, just let me go home." My shoulders slumped as tears polled in my lowered eyes and began to spill.
"You only think it was real," Mr. Kawa said. "Miss Ogino, you are terribly confused right now, mentally as well as emotionally. I'm going to get rid of that confusion, the staff and I, but we can't help you unless you accept our help."
I sighed, wiping my tears away. they hadn't worked.
Was I going to do? Just nod and say "Hai Yuki-sama" ever five minutes? It would probably get me out faster. Lying to myself, and going on and on about how they were right, I was wrong, that was how I would get home. "home" was back in Tokyo, not in that god forsaken town.
Still, saying that they - Haku - did not exist left a bad taste in my mouth just thinking of it - of betraying them. That's what it felt like.
Betrayal.
But what if... what if it all HAD been a dream?
No. my love for Haku was real.
"It was real," I said firmly through my teeth. "It IS real. I'm telling you the truth. It IS real. Haku IS real, and he loves me, and Baby, and Rin, and Kamajii, and Zeniiba and all of the others, they're my friends, and they're all real. It's the truth."
"I understand, Miss Ogino."
I could hear the disbelief in his voice.
"IT'S THE TRUTH!" I shrieked, jerking to my feet. The chair went out flying behind me, and a bouncy ball went sailing. "THEY'RE REAL, THE SPIRIT WORLD IS REAL, AND I WON'T LIE AND SAY IT ISN'T!" I set my jaw, breathing heavily. "It's real!" I cried again, and my ears were filled with a strange buzzing as Mr. Kawa pushed a button and spoke.
"IT'S THE TRUTH! IT'S REAL! THEY'RE ALL REAL!"
Doctors burst in, and held me kicking, struggling, screaming, crying, down, and I felt the pinch of a needle going into my arm. I screamed before I fell into darkness.
.
Another week passed in this manner.
.